busker
10-07-2009, 09:43 PM
A half century ago, puberty played a practical joke and left me with a desire to wear panties, bras and other items of women's clothing for which I was not correct anatomically. I didn't understand it then, and I don't understand it now. I was viewed by the few who knew , I think ,as some sort of pervert and science or society haven't changed their views much, though from reading the daily news, it may be the pot calling the kettle black.
Aside from that, I am a normal male doing the usual manly things like cooking, cleaning, sewing, taking out the trash, and of course, washing my nylons. Alas, I live alone, I'm divorced (but not for any reason relating to my "hobby" which wasn't in play during my married years). Though I must admit to now enjoying a tight skirt and lacy drawers, had someone offered me a potion to "cure" me way back when , I would have taken it no questions asked. That would have left a lifetime to persue some other things rather than spend time needlessly worrying about how I came to be perverted.. It's actually been a mostly off rather than on affair but I do admit to a certain pleasure when I'm in the mood . I'm am not, though, interested in strutting my stuff at the local mall.
I'm too old now to worry much but I thought I would see how others in the world handled their peculiar desire. Like most kids, I was the only one suffereing this problem but over the course of the last 50 years, I've learned that many things are universal--including "perversions" --it's called the human condition, warts and all. That we are no better at getting to grips with individual psychology is another thing but the people themselves have reached out to others to compare experiences. Searching brought to me to this site but the CD side was not quite as interesting or as heartbreaking as the TG side.
This brings me to the main part of my post. After reading many of the threads here and reading of the anguish and tortured lives, I wonder why it is that so many persue a path based on faulty (?) body chemistry (my assumption). My upbringing was "normal" for the times and so I conclude for myself that it is body/brain chemistry that has affected me and left me with a keen desire for lacy undies. We all have a mix of male and female hormones and having a male body with a bit too much of the female hormone seems to have left some to conclude that they are women/men trapped in the opposite body. The psychology of that notion has got to be overwhelming, and dealing with the sexual orientation question a task of Herculean proportions.
On the premise that a person has too much of one hormone to match his or her body type, why are not men in the m2f group trying to use HRT to become more male by replacing the excess(?) female hormones and thus obviate a lifetime of anguish to fullfill an unknown. Men struggle thinking they were meant to be women but what is that based on? A therapist who has a patient who believes that, is going to try to help that person achieve that goal if they feel that is the correct path. But from where is the path derived? How can one prove that nature intended something other than what is presently visible? [there is currently in the news a story of an African women runner who is being tested for excess male hormones because her perfomance is just too good for a female athlete].
There don't seem to be so many f2m transitions but of course, in modern society, women can be more masculine without being chastised for it, while men being too effeminate will always face a barrage of criticism. I did read of one poster who transitioned back to being a male (for reasons unstated)--it wasn't clear if that was only through hormone therapy, psychological therapy or surgically as well. What was the benefit, what psychological differences were there? Does he feel more maleness now?
Several posters, in providing answers to questions from those beginning a transition, indicated that after some period of time a persons brain would start to reflect a more female interest and point of view of their surroundings. Wouldn't that be the same then if a male used HRT to increase their testosterone levels and thus making them more "male".
The difficult part for those transitioning is that some lose their families,friends--everything to achieve their goal, only to remain alone--as so many have already pointed out. No relationships for the obvious reasons, and some not so obvious. A very high price to pay for nature's mistake.(?). If that magic potion were simply more male hormones would there be any takers? [In truth I don't know that that is a possibility medically, just an assumption on my part at this time].
Ignorance is like an iceberg--you only immediately see a small part and this may apply to my view of this subject. What little I know thus far would barely fill an a-cup, so I have posted this with the object of learning more. Human nature is complex, the brain infinitely so and not so well understood even in perfect health.
Thanks to any and all who might provide personal clarification on this topic.
Aside from that, I am a normal male doing the usual manly things like cooking, cleaning, sewing, taking out the trash, and of course, washing my nylons. Alas, I live alone, I'm divorced (but not for any reason relating to my "hobby" which wasn't in play during my married years). Though I must admit to now enjoying a tight skirt and lacy drawers, had someone offered me a potion to "cure" me way back when , I would have taken it no questions asked. That would have left a lifetime to persue some other things rather than spend time needlessly worrying about how I came to be perverted.. It's actually been a mostly off rather than on affair but I do admit to a certain pleasure when I'm in the mood . I'm am not, though, interested in strutting my stuff at the local mall.
I'm too old now to worry much but I thought I would see how others in the world handled their peculiar desire. Like most kids, I was the only one suffereing this problem but over the course of the last 50 years, I've learned that many things are universal--including "perversions" --it's called the human condition, warts and all. That we are no better at getting to grips with individual psychology is another thing but the people themselves have reached out to others to compare experiences. Searching brought to me to this site but the CD side was not quite as interesting or as heartbreaking as the TG side.
This brings me to the main part of my post. After reading many of the threads here and reading of the anguish and tortured lives, I wonder why it is that so many persue a path based on faulty (?) body chemistry (my assumption). My upbringing was "normal" for the times and so I conclude for myself that it is body/brain chemistry that has affected me and left me with a keen desire for lacy undies. We all have a mix of male and female hormones and having a male body with a bit too much of the female hormone seems to have left some to conclude that they are women/men trapped in the opposite body. The psychology of that notion has got to be overwhelming, and dealing with the sexual orientation question a task of Herculean proportions.
On the premise that a person has too much of one hormone to match his or her body type, why are not men in the m2f group trying to use HRT to become more male by replacing the excess(?) female hormones and thus obviate a lifetime of anguish to fullfill an unknown. Men struggle thinking they were meant to be women but what is that based on? A therapist who has a patient who believes that, is going to try to help that person achieve that goal if they feel that is the correct path. But from where is the path derived? How can one prove that nature intended something other than what is presently visible? [there is currently in the news a story of an African women runner who is being tested for excess male hormones because her perfomance is just too good for a female athlete].
There don't seem to be so many f2m transitions but of course, in modern society, women can be more masculine without being chastised for it, while men being too effeminate will always face a barrage of criticism. I did read of one poster who transitioned back to being a male (for reasons unstated)--it wasn't clear if that was only through hormone therapy, psychological therapy or surgically as well. What was the benefit, what psychological differences were there? Does he feel more maleness now?
Several posters, in providing answers to questions from those beginning a transition, indicated that after some period of time a persons brain would start to reflect a more female interest and point of view of their surroundings. Wouldn't that be the same then if a male used HRT to increase their testosterone levels and thus making them more "male".
The difficult part for those transitioning is that some lose their families,friends--everything to achieve their goal, only to remain alone--as so many have already pointed out. No relationships for the obvious reasons, and some not so obvious. A very high price to pay for nature's mistake.(?). If that magic potion were simply more male hormones would there be any takers? [In truth I don't know that that is a possibility medically, just an assumption on my part at this time].
Ignorance is like an iceberg--you only immediately see a small part and this may apply to my view of this subject. What little I know thus far would barely fill an a-cup, so I have posted this with the object of learning more. Human nature is complex, the brain infinitely so and not so well understood even in perfect health.
Thanks to any and all who might provide personal clarification on this topic.