Happier

[VS Fan]

Hi all... first real thread here...

I came out to my wife just last weekend... and she commented last night how I was acting much happier and easy around her since then... and that I had seemed distant recently (obviously the turmoil I was going through trying to work up to tell her) and that in retrospect it all made sense.

There has been discussion around here at times about easing our own burdens and dumping them on our SOs, but I was thinking that while that's true, a happier husband often makes for a happier wife and household in general... I hope that ends up being the case...

Just wanted to share,

VS Fan

[il.dso]

Good luck!
Wishing you all the best.

[mklinden2010]

Dumping, vs explaining and discussing...

One leaves her with a mess to wander through, the other moves you both onto a real path to real solutions together.

Yours is the latter case of explaining, etc., correct?

[Elaine Michelle]

Your wife sounds like a wonderful woman.

I've read your other posts and it seems like your wife's obvious intelligence, both intellectual and emotional, is helping immensely.

And it sounds like you both are communicating very well which, based on the other posts I have read, is key.

I hope things continue to go well.

Thanks for sharing!

Elaine

[Leslie Langford]

...There has been discussion around here at times about easing our own burdens and dumping them on our SOs, but I was thinking that while that's true, a happier husband often makes for a happier wife and household in general... I hope that ends up being the case...
VS Fan

Kind of a twist on Dr. Phil's oft-repeated homily of "When Momma's happy, then everyone's happy...", which my wife takes great pleasure in reminding me of whenever it suits her purposes. Needless to say, she is a big fan of Dr. Phil, and his clearly dismissive and unsympathetic attitude towards crossdressing doesn't do me any favors. I guess that beneath all that "book-learnin' '" and M.D. degree, he's still a Texan "good ol' boy" at heart.

[Kiera79]

Hi VS

Just wanted to say congrats on telling her. I know it feels good. I'm tryin to figure a way to introduce the idea of my SO doing me up in makeup for the first time. That will be fun. :D

[Sarah Doepner]

Honestly, I was such a frump and grouch to be around in the last year before I told my bride about my crossdressing, I was lucky not to have been pitched out of the house. Once that was done (well after our subsequent talks that worked out the details), I was a much nicer person to be around.

I still get frumpy and grouchy, but not as bad and we know what it takes to get me out of it.

[Ashley_in_Texas]

she commented last night how I was acting much happier and easy around her since then... and that I had seemed distant recently (obviously the turmoil I was going through trying to work up to tell her) and that in retrospect it all made sense.

Same with me


I guess that beneath all that "book-learnin' '" and M.D. degree, he's still a Texan "good ol' boy" at heart.

Personally, I think Dr. Phil is a blithering idiot. Neither my wife or I can stand him, but please don't think most Texans are backwoods morons. There are "good ol' boys" in every State, and probably in Canada too. Aye?

[Kerrylee61]

Same with me



Personally, I think Dr. Phil is a blithering idiot. Neither my wife or I can stand him, but please don't think most Texans are backwoods morons. There are "good ol' boys" in every State, and probably in Canada too. Aye?

Oh yes indeed we have a wealth of "Good old Boys" and "Red Necks" in Canada too unfortunately. Alberta is a virtual haven for them. Must be all the oil and natural gas that attracts them :heehee:

Hugs
Kerry

[VS Fan]

Yours is the latter case of explaining, etc., correct?

Indeed!


Your wife sounds like a wonderful woman.

I've read your other posts and it seems like your wife's obvious intelligence, both intellectual and emotional, is helping immensely.

And it sounds like you both are communicating very well which, based on the other posts I have read, is key.



Absolutely wonderful! You're right also that she's made it a lot easier on me. I'm sure it's still hard on her, and we have a way to go (it's only been a week) but she has definitely not been afraid to make little jokes or wink at me when something even remotely related to CD/TG (or mental issues hahah) is mentioned on TV or general conversation.


Hi VS

Just wanted to say congrats on telling her. I know it feels good. I'm tryin to figure a way to introduce the idea of my SO doing me up in makeup for the first time. That will be fun. :D


Definitely!! Good luck!! :)

Thanks all!
VS Fan

[Teri Jean]

The old adage "when she's happy you will be" applies but in this case you are the she.

Huggs Teri

[VS Fan]

The old adage "when she's happy you will be" applies but in this case you are the she.

Huggs Teri

Hahah.. yeah that's part of the fun we've been having... finding new meanings to things you hear that we wouldn't have thought twice about before :)

[JennyS.]

Same with me



Personally, I think Dr. Phil is a blithering idiot. Neither my wife or I can stand him, but please don't think most Texans are backwoods morons. There are "good ol' boys" in every State, and probably in Canada too. Aye?

Yep. Dr. Phil's 'drawl' drives me nuts, can't stand him either.

And some of those 'good ol boys' are very accepting, too... Some are, really.
I was in far east Texas a couple of years ago. I think the town is called Nacadoches, spelling is prolly wrong. Although there were 'backwoods morons', I met a TS there and she was the nicest person. She seemed well accepted, too. She worked in a little cabin looking cafe. I have to admit, that she looked pretty masculine (like many of us do), but no one in that little East Texas town seemed to care too much. I asked her to sit with me for just a second, after a minute and realizing that I'll prolly never se these people again, I revealed my desire to dress and after a little while asked her about her experiences (this could be a much larger story). She told me that she had more problems being TS while living Houston than living in that little town. I always thought that was interesting.

[Ashley_in_Texas]

Oh yes indeed we have a wealth of "Good old Boys" and "Red Necks" in Canada too unfortunately. Alberta is a virtual haven for them. Must be all the oil and natural gas that attracts them :heehee:

Hugs
Kerry

Probably so! I live in a small town, pop. about 12000. The folks here are welcoming, kind, and generous. I am a plumber, so I meet MANY, MANY people on a daily basis. I have done work for a dozen or so G and L households. The all say that this is a freindly and wecoming town. ON THE OTHER HAND, just down the highway about 15 miles is another small town, about half the size of the one in which I live, that is an oil producing area. There are more rednecks there than you can shake a stick at. The streets run brown with chewing tobacco spit. LOL. (no offence to anyone that chews tobacco)

[lemonlover]

= )
That's pretty cool.
I had a girlfriend that was so in peace with the idea, that she would buy all kinds of accesories and panties for me <3 Even a skirt once.
She loved to dress me up, so i let her.
I really loved those days!
I don't think i am ever going to find another person so open with it as her!

[sherri52]

Sounds good. I hope it gets better for you.

[joaniek]

It's good that you spoke up to your wife. I took care of my other side before we got engaged. The topic can be uncomfortable when I'm uncomfortable - but she's been okay about the whole thing. Better off having been open and honest.

[Fab Karen]

Kind of a twist on Dr. Phil's oft-repeated homily of "When Momma's happy, then everyone's happy...", which my wife takes great pleasure in reminding me of whenever it suits her purposes.
Just say "You're NOT my 'momma' "

[ColletteCD]

Hi all... first real thread here...

I came out to my wife just last weekend... and she commented last night how I was acting much happier and easy around her since then... and that I had seemed distant recently

VS Fan

Does anyone else, who has told their wife, notice that they tend to get a bit more edgy (grumpy) when you haven't had the chance to dress in a while? I know that if it has been several weeks, I tend to be a bit more grumpy. With little ones around, time is limited for dressing, so there is a fine line. With the little ones gone for the night, it is a challenge, do we give the wife a night with her husband, or do we get the chance to relieve our dressing stress?

Just wondering if I am the only one that feels this way, but expecting that I am not.

[VS Fan]

Just wondering if I am the only one that feels this way, but expecting that I am not.

Definitely not alone! It's a fine line between wanting to stay awake later than the wife to get a little time in... (of course wondering if she is thinking that you must be doing "that")... and realizing that family is first and you don't want to be selfish.

Funny though, wanting time alone to play xbox or something seems less selfish to me.. why is that?

Anyway, you're not alone :)

VS Fan

[Shelly67]

Brilliance all round , I'm glad you've both noticed a positive difference . The rest is up to you , although you've blossomed , don't forget that wife of yours - treat her like the special lady she is , woo her , spoil her .........

As my wife pointed out , as partners they know us like no one else . We give off such odd signals when trying to hide our " other side " that it sometimes becomes evident we have a secret . My wife remarked that at first she had worried there was another woman involved , that I was having an affair and was cheating . What a horrid worry that is to endure .......

As for Dr Phil , I'd like him to go argue with Jordans ( Katey Price ) cage fighter crossdressing partner . :doh:

[Sarah_GG]

... she commented last night how I was acting much happier and easy around her since then... and that I had seemed distant recently (obviously the turmoil I was going through trying to work up to tell her) and that in retrospect it all made sense.


As my wife pointed out , as partners they know us like no one else . We give off such odd signals when trying to hide our " other side " that it sometimes becomes evident we have a secret . My wife remarked that at first she had worried there was another woman involved , that I was having an affair and was cheating . What a horrid worry that is to endure .......

Congratulations VS Fan. When my SO told me I could feel the huge weight lifting from his shoulders and he became a much better person to be around. It was also a relief for me since I'd been through the whole suspicion thing too and thought my SOs absence from our relationship meant he would rather be elsewhere.

Glad you got it sorted and that it seems to be going well. Perhaps you can guide your wife towards this forum where she can get support from everyone here.

:love: