Crossdressing and employment...

[tanya1976]

Recently while attending a training course for a position that will involve working with young adults the training supervisor advised us, if we had any myspace or facebook pages etc, to set the profile to private as, 'they', meaning the young adults 'will find you on there'.
This got me to thinking about crossdressing and photos I have published in various places on the internet. Now while my pics on crossdressers.com are all fairly tame there are others of a slightly, only slightly though (!), more sexual nature elsewhere. The dilemma I find myself in is whether I should take them down?
Now although I believe in freedom of expression, the fact that to find my pictures you would really have to search for them, and then whether I am even recognisable in 'female mode', I do have to accept that the job I am training to do does involve being a role model for young adults. I have seen news items where adults have been caught involved in internet activities, not crossdressing, such as posing naked or for sexually explicit pictures and been forced to resign. Basically I've worked too hard to allow that to happen. Yet I am reluctant to take the pictures down, it's a hobby damn it, and one I enjoy tremendously and does no harm to anybody.
So any advice from anyone here? I'm sure you can figure out the job without me having to spell it out. Am I am being silly? Overly paranoid? I mean surely it is no-one elses business what you do in your own time surely???....

[Laura_Stephens]

Even if you take them down now, the cat is out of the bag and can't be put back in. www.archive.com

[kellycan27]

If people are getting fired over these things I guess to say that someone feels like it is more than just the posters business. Wrong as it may be. I would think that the odds of first being seen and second being recognized are probably pretty slim, as the internet is pretty vast. Unless maybe you post using your real name,occupation etc. These social websites have thousands and thousands of members so someone happening to discover your page seems pretty remote,but I am sure stranger things have happened. I guess it's kind of a crap shoot, but with the odds in your favor against detection. You may want to consider this.. if someone sees these sexy pictures would they be inclined to mention it to a superior? Might they not be asked what they were doing there to begin with? :heehee:

kel

[tanya1976]

Even if you take them down now, the cat is out of the bag and can't be put back in. www.archive.com

Yes but people would have to be looking for Tanya Fawcett which is in no way shape or form close to my real name. I was thinking more about a student stumbling across a picture, for example say on Flickr, and putting two and two together.
Now like I say I still think it would be fairly difficult to associate my male self with Tanya. But of course, it's not impossible. In the event that did happen I'm wondering what would happen if a student came up to me and said 'Oh I saw your picture in a submissive transvestites group' for example. Of course I believe the student would have to be consciously searching through such groups themselves but...you can see the dillema. How would parents react for example, other members of staff..Maybe I should say to hell with it, why even bother taking a chance no matter how slight, and take the whole lot down?


If people are getting fired over these things I guess to say that someone feels like it is more than just the posters business. Wrong as it may be.
kel

Yes I agree Kel. I guess the underlying issue is one of having stepped out, after having been 'in the closet' for many years, my career path is forcing me back in:sad:.
Anyway I think I take enough precautions so hopefully, as you say, luck is on my side. Maybe the safest route would be to compromise. Keep up the moderate shots and remove any, that could be considered in any way shape or form, of an overtly sexual nature.
:hugs:
Tanya.

[lavistaa62]

Young adults come in all forms and from all sorts of cultures. Unless you're in some sort of conservative religious organization I'd assume taking down the explicit photos would be advisable although as someone else pointed out, the internet archive remembers all. The Internet is still new and growing so over time things will be lost in the shuffle. The odds even now of someone finding you at random are slim to none but if they are looking with a specific desire to cause you pain and suffering then there's little one can do.

[Karren H]

If there is a chance you could impact your job and your familys financial security.. Take It down. Personally I have a lot hung out there and don't really care because I can retire any time I want... Comfortably... So unless your there.. Don't take the chance..

[karen68]

Well tanya, others have said it, they would have to know your name and if it is, as you say, nothing like your real name hun, then I don't think you have anything to worry about and as you said, it isn't as if you were posing showing anything rude or degrading. Any how you look very fem, I don't know what you look like in drab, if you don't look like the pictures then don't worry, by the way you look great hun:hugs:

[kay2]

Search engines are powerful tools - it might be possible to infer your age, location, employment, etc from posts you have made. There is even software for facial feature matching that will not be fooled by make-up and a wig. And don't assume that all people that lurk on this site are CD-friendly.

You might post information that you prefer not to make public, but never post information that must not be made public.

Yes, you are entitled to pursue your hobby, but don't be surprised at the repercussions should you advertise your hobby.

[Angel.Marie76]

It's a risk we take my putting our faces on the net. Many have said it before, and for various reasons: Loose lips sink ships - If you're in the closet, and you don't want yourself being found out, then you must stay completely IN that closet. If you've already posted content to 'Tha Intarweb' consider it submitted to the ever-growing vastness that is a ticking bomb of social distortion. If you know the right way to look for exactly what you want, and know the right keys to use in the kingdom, then doors WILL open and secret passageways will be found.

When I first joined this board, I felt giddy with excitement that I could talk and interact with people like myself.. and then, one day, I was poking about Google for something, and I don't even remember how, but my search brought up one of MY posts on this forum! Talk about a jaw dropper! There was my avatar, for all to see (which was me, no fakeness) tied to my pseudonym with no curtain draped. Granted, my real name wasn't used, but, c'mon, boolean searches with advanced parameters of : "name1" + "name2" with a little boredom and teen angst and poof, a correlation might be made. If your face is even somewhat recognizable dressed, then it stands to reason that someone will do a double-take and start digging.

A good friend of mine, who went into teaching a few years back now, had the full boat, MySpace, facebook, whatever.. and as soon as the kids found out it was like a bomb went off.. thankfully she was relatively discreet to begin with, and when the first match was lit she locked her profiles down tight and that was that.. Her admin said 'she aught been more careful' but were thankful it was contained quickly.

Do as you will, but tread lightly; the footprints you leave in this e-world are not soon erased. (if ever.. here... these folks tried and, from the report, didn't do that well to pull it off. It's kinda scary:
Deleting your digital past - for good... or not - http://www.computerworld.com/s/article/328752/Deleting_your_digital_past_for_good (http://www.computerworld.com/s/article/328752/Deleting_your_digital_past_for_good) )

[sherri]

and then, one day, I was poking about Google for something, and I don't even remember how, but my search brought up one of MY posts on this forum! Talk about a jaw dropper! There was my avatar, for all to seeThis has happened to me a couple of times, too. Googling something totally unrelated to me and boom, up pops a link to my forum posts. And one time I was Googling a subject that had nothing to do with CDing and on the first page of search results was a link to my blog.


If there is a chance you could impact your job and your familys financial security.. Take It down. Personally I have a lot hung out there and don't really care because I can retire any time I want... Comfortably... So unless your there.. Don't take the chance..Imho, this is likely to be the best advice you're liable to get on this subject. When you weigh the potential risk against what you have to gain ... well, what Karren said. 'Specially since your supervisor has already given you a pretty clear heads-up.

[Ashley_in_Texas]

This is the kind of thing I think about often. I own my own business in a small town. I try to always remember that I can't let CDing interfere with business in any way. I have worked too hard to build this business, just to loose all my customers. Besides, if I go broke, I can't go shoe shopping anymore!

[Jamie001]

How do you know that you would go broke if folks found out about your Cding? Everyone always seems to assume the WORST and usually the worries are unfounded and never happen.


This is the kind of thing I think about often. I own my own business in a small town. I try to always remember that I can't let CDing interfere with business in any way. I have worked too hard to build this business, just to loose all my customers. Besides, if I go broke, I can't go shoe shopping anymore!

[NathalieX66]

if someone sees these sexy pictures would they be inclined to mention it to a superior? Might they not be asked what they were doing there to begin with? :heehee:

kel

Exactly.:battingeyelashes:

Actually, in some weird way, I'd actually try to draw someone in who just happens to find me. ..."et tu Bruté?"

[sherri52]

As long as your using a different name you should be safe. However, it is a new generation and thes people can find thier way around a computer. I know less than most of the girls here for I didn't need a computer in my job (mailman on foot). I do watch television and most of what is said on these programs are possible like finding out ip addresses or whatever. If they find you the info will be out and you can't stop it, so be carefull especially if it means your job.

[Ashley_in_Texas]

How do you know that you would go broke if folks found out about your Cding? Everyone always seems to assume the WORST and usually the worries are unfounded and never happen.

I understand what you're saying, and in most cases you are right, BUT....
I live in a small town in Texas. There are people here that I know that probably wouldn't care, but I do have competition in this town. They are the tobacco chewing, gay bashing, homophobe, rednecks that could ruin my business. They already don't like me very much, because I came into their turf. If you lived here, and were in my shoes, you would undertand. If I were still living and working in Austin, I probably wouldn't worry as much. And no, I don't want to move back to Austin. I have a comfortable place in the country, and don't want to move or commute 45 min to an hour a day.

[kimmy p]

I've spent the last hour googling my femme name in all sorts of manner. I have found none of the few pictures that I have posted. Just my Avatar, which is why I don't use an actual picture of myself. Now if someone copied my pictures I'm screwed. But I think that Crossdressers.com does a pretty good job of locking things down.

[Rogina B]

I just googled my fem name as posted and scrolled through the numerous pages...comments and posts with different groups.It really is too much info.Glad it is not any closer to my real name!!!!How do you get rid of some of it???

[Ashley_in_Texas]

I just googled my fem name as posted and scrolled through the numerous pages...comments and posts with different groups.It really is too much info.Glad it is not any closer to my real name!!!!How do you get rid of some of it???
I'm not sure you can. Maybe delete everything from every site you are on. Not sure that would work once Google got its hands on it.

[Melinda G]

Since you asked, if it involves your livelihood, I would definately err on the side of caution. And yes, parents would most likely react very strongly negative. Parents seem to be very protective of their children.

[tanya1976]

Thanks to everybody for all the replies. I hate to do it but I have to decided to err on the side of caution. Most of my pics are still up but I've restricted who can see them. Ultimately I suppose it is better to be safe than sorry.

[erickka]

That is the biggest reason that I don't do any internet stuff. If it has never been out there, it is a lot harder for someone else to mind your business. Unfortunately, those who are hell bent on screwing up people's lives will still find a back door to achieve their ultimate goal.

[EjayeCD]

I would definately set them to private. Why take the chance to expose yourself & take the chance of losing the job that you trained for?

[sherri]

But I think that Crossdressers.com does a pretty good job of locking things down.I'm not sure what you mean by this, but in the interest of disspelling any sense of false security, I can download a copy of any public photograph on this site -- posts, profiles, galleries, avatars, you name it -- and do with it as I wish without anyone being the wiser. (As a matter of principle I don't do it without the owner's consent, and even then I think I've done it only once cuz it involved a good friend.) Even the private photos are available to our contacts for copying. And the content of this forum is wide open to search engine crawlers. Just so you'll know, not being critical of the forum.

[Angel.Marie76]

I just googled my fem name as posted and scrolled through the numerous pages...comments and posts with different groups.It really is too much info.Glad it is not any closer to my real name!!!!How do you get rid of some of it???

See my post above, and the links to the articles I brought forth. The summary is, as much as Laura_S noted, once it's out in the 'net, its out, there is no retraction. You can do as much damage control as you'd like, but it's generally permanent, with images stored with indelible ink, backed up on archives and archived servers for the rest of whatever time exists. It is the 'Butterfly effect', for whatever it's worth, without the ability to go back in time and actually squish the cute little thing. This is more 'You let the butterfly out of its cage into the world' and no one's ever seen that pretty butterfly before, so now they're curious.. tick tock, tick tock.. It might get lucky and fly happily off into the atmosphere, or it might end up like Icarus and come crashing to the sea after being too giddy with its new found freedom.

My best suggestion, if you were to choose to 'erase' yourself online, is to do just that. Archives are archives, and people can search to their hearts content.. but active content will only go so far. If you wipe all immediately visible traces of yourself online, consider it only the first layer. That includes, for the record, wiping out your profile here, and so on... Don't ever email anyone again either, that's all stored as well. You can basically browse the web anonymously if you're careful, but the second you buy anything.. ding! there's another tangible log.

Remember though, 'Paranoia will destroy ya..' if you let it.

[charlie]

Hello Tanya!
Why risk having to say "damn I should have removed all that" later when it could be easily done now? Our "hobby" is not accepted by society in general and if any of your pictures are traced back it will be a problem that you do not want to have. You will be fired as not acceptable to being around children or worse. It (removing all female pictures of you) will go against your feelings and sense of right and wrong, but safe, and the right thing to do.