Funny CD stories to cheer us up

[Emily Ann Brown]

It may be time to get laughter going again since the bug seems to be rampant as of late around here. Some body try to top this (true stories only please):

I've been wearing stockings and panties under my slacks to fight off the crazies I'm feeling in part from not fully dressing since early June. Yesterday I also had on an ankle bracelet and a ladies diamond pinky ring. I lost my socks somewhere too. I've got a little buzz going.

I'm at the drink machine and a coworker comes up behind me and puts a large hand on my shoulder and squeezes. It's one of the "redneck crowd". This is always trouble since I don't fit in.

"Emily (no, he used my real name), you got a big ol' secret you want to confess to or do I drag you out from where you're hiding?" (exact words)

It was deathly quiet....can anyone guess what is racing through my mind?
When in a crunch I believe it best to not cut and run until you know how big the guns are, so I didn't say a word.

"I think Emily is sweating, don't you guys?" Among the body fluids I was leaking was sweat I'm sure. " Go ahead Emily, we can all see your little secret" (again, exact words).

When in doubt play dumb. "I don't have a clue what you're talking about !"

"Oh come on...two months ago you were 75% grey Emily!"

I suddenly remember that for the last two months I have been using Greecian Formula to look younger just in case that layoff that's coming gets me.


Emily Ann

[Clare]

Whew! That was minties moment!

Lucky you didn't have a bra on honey, he would have felt the straps over your shoulders for sure!

I hope that doesn't happen too often to you - my nerves would be on edge otherwise.

Glad you got through it ok.

Christine

[Nicole Summers]

I only confess when I'm in a darkened closet, the other guy is wearing that white collar thingy and he always goes first

[kathy gg]

Okay, I'll throw a funny story in. When I was at Pride Day I of course was dressed up like a drag queen(and I am a genetic girl, in case any dont know) . I must have had about a dozen people want my photo. The funny part was when I was standing in front of Starbucks waiting for Amanda to come out of the washroom. I had one guy come up to me and ask to take my picture, he commented how pretty I looked. Then, right before I thought he was going to walk away, he says to me "I am not gay, okay? I am straight. But I find you strangely attractive." Of course me being a gg and him being a guy, well I just said thanks . but I so wanted to say "sorry for ruining the fantasy, but you are straight if you find me attractive."

[Melissa A.]

I have, on a few occasions, gotten up in the dark of morning(late!), rushed myself off to work, Only to notice, either in the driveway, or a block or two down the road, Pretty red fingernails operating my steering wheel. Gonna be REALLY late today...

Hugs,

Melissa :)

[eileen1969]

a year ago I came out! I was a nervous wreck! lol I came outside of my house! I knew one of the tenants were out there! I was very scared to just leave my home! As I was leaving he came into the house! (smiles) I left quickly as I could~ (giving that endless debate in my head) I slipped in my heels on the stairs! fell right on my ass! and sat there for a few seconds! he asked of I where I ok? I said "yeah~ in my manly vioce!" I was so embarrassed! its now funny! :eek: :eek: :eek: ;)

[Ophelia D'Void]

These all sound like Mentos moments to me.