Why do women regard us as creepy?

[helenr]

I know I am generalizing big time, but, honestly, it seems that most women have more discomfort with men wearing their 'unmentionables' (as they were once termed) than many other sorts of abberations,if I may use that term.
This isn't meant as a huge put down,though I know it sounds very negative, but I am wondering if the 'creepy factor' is what is subconsciously viewed by women. I have seen talk shows when it seems that a guy could be there with two women-both pregnant by him-that is not so great, but sort of viewed as OK-ie he is straight, if careless.
Have a transgendered or just plain crossdresser and it seems the reaction is more negative, not sympathetic.almost mockery.
I don't mean this as a huge self put down, as I have been a crossdresser for over 50 years. now more transgendered feeling and no sexual eroticism left at 62, but just something I have struggled to comprehend forever.thoughts?

[Wen4cd]

I think the negative image in the subconscious goes something like this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJ7ApLuFLRo).

[AmberLynn]

I think it's because gentiec females are hard wired to see men as sweating,grunting,slobish and shirtless pig's. not beutiful careing human being's. Im out of date with women,thank goodness im married to an older oldfashioned woman that like's my careing sensitive side,even if she dont understand it.


it goes back to how they were raised,you are a girl you wear frilly pretty thing's and they are men and smell and dont wear shirts and belch and fart like common yard ape's :eek: at least thats what i belive. they like us are told we have to conform and most people buy into that sort of thing. after all man invented cloths and hence created the huge "gender barrier of clothing" to further separte them self's from women.

[kellycan27]

I think it's because gentiec females are hard wired to see men as sweating,grunting,slobish and shirtless pig's. not beutiful careing human being's. Im out of date with women,thank goodness im married to an older oldfashioned woman that like's my careing sensitive side,even if she dont understand it.


it goes back to how they were raised,you are a girl you wear frilly pretty thing's and they are men and smell and dont wear shirts and belch and fart like common yard ape's :eek: at least thats what i belive. they like us are told we have to conform and most people buy into that sort of thing. after all man invented cloths and hence created the huge "gender barrier of clothing" to further separte them self's from women.

Hmmmm, I am not a GG, and I believe that I must be "hard wired" in much the same way. Nothing does it for me like a big strong masculine man. Shirtless works too! :heehee: Not all masculine guys are sweaty,grunting,slobish pigs, and it doesn't take frilly panties and such for them to be sensitive and caring yet totally manly. To be perfectly honest I feel a lot safer with my big strong masculine guy than I would with one who complains about not being able to wear a dress in pubic, wants to wear my clothes , or shouts his protests from the inside of a closet. Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against cross dressing, but it does absolutely nothing for me. it strikes me as funny how the cd's in here complain more about men than the gg's and according you all, 85% are straight. WTF?

[Kathi Lake]

Wow, generalize much? :)

Seriously, I haven't really met a woman yet that would classify me as creepy (or greepy :)). And yes, I certainly do wear "their" unmentionables. It's kind of hard not to when a woman is measuring and fitting you for a bra, after all. :)

I have to go back to paraphrase my idol, "Creepy is as creepy does."

Kathi

[Kate Simmons]

It's just that to a lot of people and especially most heterosexual women, seeing a man don female skivvies or additional feminine stuff puts him in the light of "diminished capacity" as a man and they question how he is a good provider for his family or would be for a potential mate. Also, what would be more important to him when the going gets tough?

[sherri52]

I find most women get a kick out of it when your wearing thier panties. They'll even tell others in fun ( not ridicule). Wear the outer clothes and the attitude changes and they think your weird.

[Karren H]

Sometimes........ I even think its creepy...

[TSchapes]

None of the women I talk to (keep in mind I'm out at work) think that what I do is creepy. Do you have any specific examples, or are you just imagining what they would say? Are you watching Jerry Springer and thinking that all people are like the people on that show?

We are our own worst enemy some times.

Most of the gals at work like the way Tracy looks. Some have asked me for advice. Honest!

-Tracy

[Phyliss]

I can't begin to explain it, but, in my case, she knows I always under dress and wear ladies shirts, trousers, and "sensible" shoes, and that's OK. However, change the trousers for a skirt and it's "over the line" .

I guess it's a kind of invading their space thing. Undies are OK because they're not seen and it's sorta kinky, but anything more and now I'm considered to be mocking them.

I don't get it either, but I still do what I can as much as I can.

[Barbara Dugan]

I don't wear unmentionables unless I am dressing and not really into women so I am not sure they find me creepy or not as long as the shirtless hunk find me atractive for any reason I am fine:hugs:

[Kristy 56]

I think like everything else,you really can't put everyone in the same category. Some of us maybe are creepy,or come across as such ,just as the general population. Some GG's will think Cd-ing is cool,and some for moral,religious reasons etc. will think it's disgusting. In the end you have to please,and be happy with yourself. Everything else is gravy.

[Jeanna]

We are talking about impressions that people have of us. I have noticed a few gg's that show that they're not impressed, but I have met a lot more that are kind,helpful and understanding but maybe they're trying to sell me something.
Jeanna

[Gisele]

I have yet to meet a GG that had told me outright that my dressing is creepy or that I have a problem. Now what is said or thought of behind my back may be something else. :idontknow:

I have met many GG's that are VERY supportive of us and are members of TG/CD/TS support groups. Not all of them are SO's of CDer's, they just think that we have rights and accept us as one of the girls.:hugs:

[Andy66]

For the most part I don't see crossdressers as creepy at all ...but...

sweating,grunting,slobish and shirtless pig's.
that guy, lurking in the lingerie section and pawing the unmentionables... yeah, he's creepy. It's an appearance thing.

[AmandaM]

Appearances, yes. If you're a hairy ape in a bad dress, and act like a slob, yes, you are creepy. If you are refined, you are more accepted.

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

We are our own worst enemy some times.

Most of the gals at work like the way Tracy looks. Some have asked me for advice. Honest!

-Tracy

Ditto to what Tracy said. I have yet to encounter a GG that voiced that they thought I was creepy. Yes, its possible they may have thought it... but the general vibe from my section of the woods is acceptance.

So many stereotypes out there makin it hard for the rest of us.

*hugs*

Zarabeth

[AKASadieGG]

Well as a gg of a cding husband I do not see men as grunting, sweating, farting, shirtless pigs. I see the man I married as very sexy in his jeans, shirt and work boots. I also like spending time with him when he is "dressed". To me he is the same person either way. It's what's inside that counts. I don't see him as diminished capacity of being the man I married. If you are a creep then you will be seen as creepy. IMHO.

[AmberLynn]

i guess that's my problem "the neck of the wood's" where i live is just that wood's and farm land. if it's not natural it's evil incarnet. I ment nothing personal with my comment's earlier,that was actully a responce i got one time just 1 from a girl

[stefanie]

i have found the opposite...most gg seem to be intrigued and interested...almost in a fun way. All said, if you she is your significant other, then all of sudden it seems to become creepy!

now that is a weird double standard.

[kellycan27]

i have found the opposite...most gg seem to be intrigued and interested...almost in a fun way. All said, if you she is your significant other, then all of sudden it seems to become creepy!

now that is a weird double standard.

I think what she meant is that some gg's don't have an issue with someone crossdressing as long as it isn't their SO. I don't see a double standard there... just personal preference. I find most of the gg's I have met nice, but i wouldn't want to marry one. I said the same thing above. I don't see anything at all wrong with being a crossdresser, it's just not my preference in an SO. Clear things up for ya?

[CherylFlint]

Good question. I used to get upset when I would ask the saleslady at a lingerie store if they sold mastectomy pads, or 3/4 underwired bras in size 42 C and the little old sales person would get all nervous. Some wouldn't know what to do they would become so ditty. I've learned to avoid people like that at all costs which is why I buy my underthings, and wigs and shoes, through catalogs. Most of the other stuff I get at thrift shops.
I don't know why it makes them so nutty. I've thought about it and have come to the conclusion that the world is mostly made up of small minded people and let it go at that.

[Barbara Jo]

Personally I have found that some woman have a problem with CD because they keep hearing "I feel like a womam" from from us.
They maintain that we can't possible feel like a woman and we can only feel like a man pretending to be a womam. There is probably some degrees of truth to this unlees one is a true M to F transexual.

Anyway some woman begin to feel we are making a mockery of being female.

One must realize that as there are males who don't like CDs,TG persons etc, there are also females who don't like us either.

[kellycan27]

Personally I have found that some woman have a problem with CD because they keep hearing "I feel like a womam" from from us.
They maintain that we can't possible feel like a woman and we can only feel like a man pretending to be a womam. There is probably some degrees of truth to this unlees one is a true M to F transexual.

Anyway some woman begin to feel we are making a mockery of being female.

One must realize that as there are males who don't like CDs,TG persons etc, there are also females who don't like us either.

That might be true or the gg's who read the boards, but they pretty much seem to be in favor. I think we're talking gg's in general. ???
I could be wrong.

[Joanne f]

Personally i have found it the opposite way around , GGs accept me far more than Gms do , infant when everyone found out it was only GGs that would acknowledge me whereas GMs would turn their back on me so i have a very big respect for GGs (even the ones that are hard to get on with ):heehee: that was just a joke (or was it):battingeyelashes:

[Sammy777]

I don't know what to say to that, but I know one thing for sure:

http://samantha.arcaco.com/cowbell.jpg

[noeleena]

Hi.
In many ways you male s that is your takeing over a role that belong s to women . & is seen this way by many . many male s can not take a male crossing over to live as a female . or a woman . & yes some men are creepy . wether they dress or not . in the term s of m to f .
As a i e . our grand daughter was with me running up the road . she saw a guy . stoped dead in her tracks turned then flat out run back to me jumping in to my arms . & said so soft . i dont like him . she glung to me so tight . what does that say . she was 5 . she s 6 y 10 m now .
She saw some thing that was not right . not the clothes ... instinct..
Being a andro . i see both sides . because thats how i m wired .
I m accepted . with in our groups . i meet many new people because of what we do .
The other detail would be many people dont know you . & so that acceptance is not there ,
It depend s on the person . attatude s . & to some degree how that one dresses . & acts . or is the person just trying to imitate a female or a woman. for what ever reason .
Many male s are like as has been said . & i dont like being around them from a male or womans perpective. the hackels are crawling up my back . & that s from a woman ....
Me ......
Now of cause not all men are like that .
I know for me men are okay at 4 feet away . women are better at 2 feet & closer
There is a difference . its in built . its not some thing you just add on. later on when men dress as female . there is that differenance between men & women ....even tho some dont wont to accept that . well it s life ....
For me it s i dont relate in the same way men do with men . never did ..nor will i because i m a woman ....
...noeleena...

[Fab Karen]

...than I would with one who complains about not being able to wear a dress in pubic, wants to wear my clothes , or shouts his protests from the inside of a closet. Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against cross dressing, but it does absolutely nothing for me. it strikes me as funny how the cd's in here complain more about men than the gg's and according you all, 85% are straight. WTF?
Speaking of BROAD generalizations...
Not representative of us all, here or elsewhere. Let's not attack entire groups of people as though they are all alike, you get further from reality that way.

[sometimes_miss]

The main reason that crossdressing would upset a woman (or 'creep them out'), especially if it's HER MAN that's doing it, is because it upsets how she sees the world. We're brought up to believe that everyone has a role in life, and that they will responsibly accept it. With that role comes expectations, and everyone pretty much learns to function in a way that depends on others doing what is expected of them. For example; we depend on police to uphold the law and protect us from violent criminals, firemen to respond quickly in the event of a fire and save our lives and the lives of our loved ones, doctors to help us when we're sick, etc.. Men throughout history have been depended upon to protect women, and provide for them when necessary, often make the hard decisions and taking responsibility for them, even when those women aren't necessarily our own mate. When a woman sees a man wanting to and taking a female role, it upsets her view of how society (and perhaps her relationship) functions, and can throw much of what she believed life was supposed to be like, in doubt. Her feeling of security is suddenly gone, and depending on how close she is to the guy who she has suddenly discovered as wanting to be feminine, it will disrupt how she feels she will have to respond to all of the parts of her life. Whether creepy or just unsettling, it's easy to see how she'd feel that way.

[Paige.]

Some CD men are creepy.
Some men that have never dressed are creepy.
Some women that are repulsed by a dressed man are creepy.
Some women that suport CD's are creepy.
Some women think any man is creepy.
Some women think all women are creepy.

Creepy is just another creepy label used by closed minded people.

I am a creepy acceptor of CD's.

[kellycan27]

Speaking of BROAD generalizations...
Not representative of us all, here or elsewhere. Let's not attack entire groups of people as though they are all alike, you get further from reality that way.

Some...not all, I stand corrected. One the other hand I make my assumptions from observervation and interaction over the past 6 six years or so. I have no axe to grind with cross dressers, and if you have read my past threads I think that you would have noticed that i really don't have any issues with what anyone does...live and let live. I am sorry that you feel I was attacking anybody, as it was not my intent. I base my opinion on the impressions that I get from these same observations and interactions. What else do we have to go by? I truly believe that I am an open minded and fair person, and I also believe that experience is the best teacher. So far in my short life this is the impression that I have been given. I don't know how else to explain it.
:hugs:
Kelly

[tamarav]

It is easy to sit back and speculate what women think, rather than ask them. I find this topic rather refreshing since it does point out one of my problems with some of our fellow CDs.

Many of us tend to want to shove out crossdressing down unsuspecting people by telling them outright that we are a CD and like to wear _______ ( fill in the blank with your proclivity) In my opinion, there is nothing creepier.

I meet some really wierd people. I work with real women. Those same women that many of you speculate about what they are thinking. Ever try asking them?

Face the facts. We have some very creepy members, simply because they remain hidden most of their lives and eventually reveal some aspect of their secret world as if everyone else is supposed to react to it, either positively or otherwise.

One day at work in a salon I worked in, a big rig stopped right in front of the shop. A burly, bearded hulk that had failed to shower in the past few days jumped down and made a beeline directly toward me. I went into a defensive posture, ready to kick his ass, when he smiled great big and blurted out that he was "Maxine" (real name not used here). He knew of me and we had written via this forum and he had dropped by to look at some wigs.

Creep factor = 10 at first, but after a few minutes we were best friends and she left with 3 nice wigs and some makeup.

So, don't undersell us. Some of us do come off as creepy, at first.

[MonikaW]

Some CD men are creepy.
Some men that have never dressed are creepy.
Some women that are repulsed by a dressed man are creepy.
Some women that suport CD's are creepy.
Some women think any man is creepy.
Some women think all women are creepy.

Creepy is just another creepy label used by closed minded people.

I am a creepy acceptor of CD's.

Well said Paige!

[docrobbysherry]

Why would ANYONE think CDs r CREEPY?:Angry3:

( Said the pirate, wearing a female suit and mask!):brolleyes:

[AmberLynn]

maybe it is because women think we are try to take away another of the thing's that's supossed to belong to them. I never thought about asking a woman why they would or if they do think cd's are creepy. maybe a street poll on the subject would be a idea. claim it as a study,might be a interesting poll of normal everyday woman,as the guy's to. what do you gal's think?

[kellycan27]

maybe it is because women think we are try to take away another of the thing's that's supossed to belong to them. I never thought about asking a woman why they would or if they do think cd's are creepy. maybe a street poll on the subject would be a idea. claim it as a study,might be a interesting poll of normal everyday woman,as the guy's to. what do you gal's think?

I don't know Amber, that could explain some peoples reaction. there are probably as many different answers to this as there are people. People being the key word. We all have our likes,dislikes and predjudices, and the creep factor is going to be based on these things. Take me for example. I have never hidden the fact that my preference is for men. Although my own personal preference doesn't really affect anybody that doesn't go in that direction, a lot of people including a lot of cross dressers find the idea pretty dang creepy. A lot of people, while it isn't their cup of tea don't have an issue with it. You can educate people until the cows come home, and still have people that, while they may understand....still aren't going to like it.Whether we believe them right or wrong,fair or unfair, it is what it is. For me personally I believe that understanding this has made it a lot easier for me to be out there amongst society. You can't please all of the people all of the time. You just do your best to eek out your little piece of the pie.
kel

[Sally2005]

If anyone does, I think it is because you feel and act that way. If you act normal, people treat your normally. If you mix male and female traits that can weird some peope out.

[joandher]

Well my wife used to say drag artists and c/ders they fascinate me and she would watch them on the TV with great interest but as soon as I start coming out to her she doesn't like it,
I think its the old saying you can please some of the people all the time,but you cant please all of them, all of the time

anyway there would be no fun in it if everybody excepted us cross-dressing all the time,would there


:hugs: J-JAY

[Sherry-Stephanie]

I've had many contacts with women when I've been dressed and have yet to have any negative response back....and panties have come into conversation one way or another and no eeeekkkkk from the ladies....actually women I've found are Wwwwaaaaaaaaaaayyyy more accpeting than anyone else out there....

[Veronica75]

I'm finding a LOT of broad generalizations here... and, in a sense, this is one more.

To most people, crossdressers are strange and foreign. Generally, some of the more common responses by folks to something strange and foreign are:

1) They want to kill it
2) They want to laugh at it
3) They want to marginalize it
4) They want to explain it
5) They want to discover it
6) They want to procreate with it (or try)

Which of these (or some other response) a particular person falls into depends on his or her culture, education, past and present exposure to other strange things or customs, personal experiences, religious beliefs or lack thereof, and a million other potential influences on their thoughts and attitudes, and how all of these factors relate to the characteristics of the particular strange and foreign thing being experienced.

In short, some GGs will find any CD creepy. Some will not find even creepy CDs creepy. Some will find the creepiness exciting, some will find it frightening. I could go on, but there are as many reactions to crossdressing as there are people reacting to crossdressing. Some are close to each other on the spectrum, others are not.

[Fab Karen]

Some...not all...
So far in my short life this is the impression that I have been given. I don't know how else to explain it.
:hugs:
Kelly

On this site at least, there's a vocal minority expressing the way your language said all of us are. The larger reality is far more diverse. A person could be exposed to the worst stereotypes of a TS, but does that mean then ALL TS people are like that?

[Lorileah]

Do you suppose they find CDs creepy because we talk about what color underwear we have on (or cut or material) or we act like silly little children or even worse the "S" word when we get out in public OR we think that dressing up is a reason to have sex. I find those creepy myself

[Jessinthesprings]

My personal experiance is this.

It does not matter what sex/gender that the person is, it is up to the individual. However, the women who do accept us seem to be more understanding.

Western society is male dominated. Being a man in this coulture is like being top-dog, or even best version of human. All through the bible, and history there are tones of women "wanting" to take on the male role. My pastor made a sermon once that the woman's biggest sin is to take the man's place.

So with all of this sociatal pressure wher being the man is better a male to female is going aginst what is accepted by the majority. You are giving up being the evolutionry equvilant of perfection for imperfection, and taking a lower place in society. Neither sex can understand why we would do this for reasons above.

There are plenty of excuses why they feel this way but, we are fighting inate human nature, but we can overcome this as we are not ignorant animals controled by our insticts.

[Karen564]

Eew, This whole thread is getting kinda Creepy... LOL Just Kidding:D

My Ex wife says I'm creepy, but it's not because of the clothes I'm wearing, it has more to do with seeing my boobs, hair & figure..

As she explained it to me, it's only because she knew me as a guy before, but if she didn't ever know me before, and just say as a co-worker, she could tolerate it much better, but all the same would still think of it as weird, but not creepy..

I dont see myself as creepy at all, but sure do see my fair share of creeps out there...
The world is loaded with them..but I do my best to keep my distance, they just scare me too much..

:hugs:

[Toni_Lynn]

I know I've said this in other threads, but I feel that it succinctly answers the question. If you were a GG and your impression of TG/ CD based was based on some of the more outrageous and over the top drag queens out there -- someone who satirised the way you as a GG looked and acted, you would also find us creepy -- Just as we as male may not like to be associated with the sweaty hairy macho over the top image of a guy -- and are creeped out by that!

Yet we as a people embrace these individuals and hold them as idols and heroes. This is our very public face. Shouldn't our heroes be the likes of Renee Richards and Wendy Carlos, or even people like the old classic female impersonators like Jim Bailey -- people who have a certain amount of dignity. If we treat the woman that we choose to emulate with dignity, then they in turn would not find us creepy

That's my thoughts.

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Dutchess]

I am jealous of my husband getting to wear all thos demi bras I wish I could wear ( I am a natural 34D ,my boobs laugh at demi bras) not creeped out ....

However ,, I ONCE ,, only once was creeped out to the point of fright by a CD-er once out in public here in South Texas at a gas station in Aransas Pass ( For those from Texas that know what that town is like ) who was totally dressed but ,, had REALLY wild greasy hair , runs in his panty hose,, wasn't shaved and you could see his bra real badly ,,like the clothes didnt fit ,,hair all over his arms and chest and he was swishing his skirt all around near me getting gas.. It was bizarre and it did scare me . I was at least 40 at the time ,, and like alot here know, I was literally raised around beautiful, wild , silly drag queens and now my beloved CD-er so it takes alot to scare me like that . I didnt know if he was joking, serious, drunk , mentally ill , or just was trying to get the hang of CD-ing .

[kellycan27]

On this site at least, there's a vocal minority expressing the way your language said all of us are. The larger reality is far more diverse. A person could be exposed to the worst stereotypes of a TS, but does that mean then ALL TS people are like that?

I did correct myself and admit that NOT ALL ARE, and in future I will be careful no to generalize. If you want to continue to hold on to that...so be it. However, it does not change the fact that I based my opinion on observations and interactions that I have encountered on this site and in my personal life. You are right in saying not all, but suffice to say enough to influence my opinion. I have no animosity or ill feelings about crossdressers. I see no conflict of interest between transsexual and CD, so what would be the point of (as you put it) attacking them? Let me ask you another question. Where was your indigence when someone stated that men were sweaty,smelly,uncaring yard apes? Are not crossdressers still men whether dressed or not? Do you agree with that statement? If not.. where is your ire? Could it be because the statement was made by a cross dresser and not a TS that it was OK?
And if so.. Is that statement less inflammatory than mine. Doesn't the language that that person used seem to include ALL men?
I am sorry that you seem to have taken my statement so personally, and I am sorry that you won't accept the my apology for "generalizing. For me this isn't about crossdressers or transsexuals, just differences of opinions between people. You are entitled to yours as I am mine.

Kel

[AmandaM]

I'm getting creeped out.

[VeronicaMoonlit]

Do you suppose they find CDs creepy because we talk about what color underwear we have on (or cut or material) or we act like silly little children or even worse the "S" word when we get out in public OR we think that dressing up is a reason to have sex. I find those creepy myself

I suppose that might explain it.

But as I've said, the closet can make us " a bit barefoot in the head" and it takes a while to break some of the behaviors picked up because of the shame and guild and hiding. It did me.

Veronica Rogers

[Fab Karen]

You are right in saying not all, but suffice to say enough to influence my opinion.
The point I was trying to make to you is, don't judge an entire group ( no matter the category) just by your personal experience. People are individuals.
Let me ask you another question. Where was your indigence when someone stated that men were sweaty,smelly,uncaring yard apes? ...where is your ire? Could it be because the statement was made by a cross dresser and not a TS that it was OK?
I assume you meant indignant, rather than being destitute. No, I just hadn't gotten around to the subject of defining males with that kind of broad brush in this thread. Don't take that as implying I condone it. Doesn't matter WHO says it. All men aren't like that ( and I've said so in other discussions), and I suspect the T-girls who say such things are trying to win points with GG's, "See, I'm not an 'icky man.' ":rolleyes:
I am sorry that you seem to have taken my statement so personally, and I am sorry that you won't accept the apology
Kel
I do accept it, I just wanted you to be aware of what you're saying & be more careful. No hard feelings.

[Fab Karen]

Do you suppose they find CDs creepy because we talk about what color underwear we have on (or cut or material) or we act like silly little children or even worse the "S" word when we get out in public OR we think that dressing up is a reason to have sex. I find those creepy myself
As Tonto said to the Lone Ranger: What you mean "we," white man?

[Frédérique]

I know I am generalizing big time, but, honestly, it seems that most women have more discomfort with men wearing their 'unmentionables' (as they were once termed) than many other sorts of abberations,if I may use that term.
Have a transgendered or just plain crossdresser and it seems the reaction is more negative, not sympathetic.almost mockery.

I’ve said this before – my theory is that women don’t understand men wanting to look or “be” like women because they…are women! I mean, they’ve been there, done that, so what’s the big deal? Men have spent years with uncomfortable, unstylish clothing, so it’s obvious that nicer things (to wear or simply to touch) would be attractive to them. I don’t know how women feel about the clothes they’ve been wearing all or most of their lives, but, I’m guessing they’ve felt somewhat trapped by it – how else to explain their reaction? I’ve heard women complain about bras, hosiery, heels (ankle problems), makeup, wearing dresses or skirts in cold weather, and so forth. Any self-respecting woman would turn to a crossdressing male and think “why on Earth would you want to go through all that we have had to put up with?” I can see their viewpoint, but I think a more enlightened female would at least understand the urge to crossdress…

I was thinking today that I have no problem understanding FtM crossdressing – I mean, being a crossdresser myself, I‘m tuned in to that wavelength, but I rewired my own brain years ago…:heehee:


To be perfectly honest I feel a lot safer with my big strong masculine guy than I would with one who complains about not being able to wear a dress in pubic, wants to wear my clothes , or shouts his protests from the inside of a closet.

Appearances can be deceiving. If you feel “safe” with your big, strong, masculine guy, that’s OK, but keep in mind that he (like most males) is bluffing his way through life on perceived strength. I speak from experience – I’ve been among these supposedly “strong” males my whole life, and they are as insecure as the rest of us. I wish you well…:straightface:


Not representative of us all, here or elsewhere. Let's not attack entire groups of people as though they are all alike, you get further from reality that way.

A wise statement…

[Satrana]

If someone can define what a creep looks like and how they are supposed to behave then I would be very grateful so I could ensure that I don't possess any of those creepy qualities.

Or maybe creepiness is an entirely subjective label used to demean others who do not conform to your definition of normality.

So if someone finds your CDing "creepy" it actually tells you alot more about that person than it describes yourself. As others have said, it is small-minded people who have strict sexist ideas of what constitutes a man who get upset when their prejudices are challenged.

[Sheila]

If someone can define what a creep looks like and how they are supposed to behave then I would be very grateful so I could ensure that I don't possess any of those creepy qualities.

Or maybe creepiness is an entirely subjective label used to demean others who do not conform to your definition of normality.

I find myself agreeing with you here Satrana ........ a rare occurrence we will both agree


So if someone finds your CDing "creepy" it actually tells you a lot more about that person than it describes yourself. As others have said, it is small-minded people who have strict sexist ideas of what constitutes a man who get upset when their prejudices are challenged.
but you see that last bit lets you down ........... because you then begin to demean those who do not conform to your idea of prejudices or rather your definition ....... just because some one does not agree with you does not make them small-minded people sorry just my :2c:


In general I find people creep me out by mannerisms, looks rather than by dress and I am a GG :)

[Danielle H]

I believe Buffalo Bill may have something to do with it, as well as a couple other real or mythical serial killers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCSZfmbFJyQ&feature=related

[Samantha B L]

I think some women are creeped out by CD'ing,hell yes. But really it seems like the ladies are more accepting than guys.

[Nicole Erin]

If you try to act and dress to blend in as a woman, even if you are a non-passable TS or CD, you should do fine.

What most people find "creepy" is when someone seems to want to publicly display their fetishes. If you are decently dressed, everything covered, honest effort on your looks, people probably won't even notice you. It is when you get these TS or CD who walk around with their butt hanging out of a too-short mini skirt or whatever that draws attention.

If someone likes to wear their intimates under their presentable clothes where the public cannot see it, no big deal. I don't think women find lingerie so sexy though, maybe on themselves but not on a TS or CD unless she truely has the body for it. Even then I don't imagine most GG's would be impressed.

I do think passable and non passable TS/CD each face slightly unique problems with things though.
If a TG is seen in public and isn't passing, but is decently dressed, the reaction would be mostly "OH hmm, well I thought it was a woman for a second." If a passable one has her cover blown, people really seem to freak.
"OMG, did you know Jane Transgirl is really a man?!"

Yeah but basically it is the public display of fetishes that bothers people. Not so much the gender variance.

[Wen4cd]

I believe Buffalo Bill may have something to do with it, as well as a couple other real or mythical serial killers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyTSeBcvubM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCSZfmbFJyQ&feature=related


You can thank the pop culture prototype (http://www.legendsofhorror.org/images/bates/pimg6.jpg) for this I guess.

[Prissy Linda]

If you try to act and dress to blend in as a woman, even if you are a non-passable TS or CD, you should do fine.

What most people find "creepy" is when someone seems to want to publicly display their fetishes. If you are decently dressed, everything covered, honest effort on your looks, people probably won't even notice you. It is when you get these TS or CD who walk around with their butt hanging out of a too-short mini skirt or whatever that draws attention.

If someone likes to wear their intimates under their presentable clothes where the public cannot see it, no big deal. I don't think women find lingerie so sexy though, maybe on themselves but not on a TS or CD unless she truely has the body for it. Even then I don't imagine most GG's would be impressed.

I do think passable and non passable TS/CD each face slightly unique problems with things though.
If a TG is seen in public and isn't passing, but is decently dressed, the reaction would be mostly "OH hmm, well I thought it was a woman for a second." If a passable one has her cover blown, people really seem to freak.
"OMG, did you know Jane Transgirl is really a man?!"

Yeah but basically it is the public display of fetishes that bothers people. Not so much the gender variance.

I totally agree Nicole... Leave the fetishes at home.

[helenr]

wow! so many reponses. thanks to all. I should try to clarify, if this helps. I think that for most of us, crossdressing is accompanied by a mental shift-we would prefer to pose and present as we percieve a woman would-sit like Leslie Stahl (60 minutes) , not like Joe College at a football talk. This probably isn't how most women would like to picture their guys deporting themselves. Unfortunately, sometimes, there is 'aping' that might be seen in a cheap burlesque and this may be part of the stereotyping that may go on. Clearly, if we are met in a non weird context, discussion carried on, etc on-it would become OK and less fearful to females. just my thoughts. best to all, helen

[xd-tigger]

I think that some women are too close minded, I think they think we are creepy becuse we should wear jeans t-shirt and boots and not skirts or dresses. It's like we are invading their space.

[PetiteDuality]

Hmmmm, I am not a GG, and I believe that I must be "hard wired" in much the same way. Nothing does it for me like a big strong masculine man. Shirtless works too! :heehee: Not all masculine guys are sweaty,grunting,slobish pigs, and it doesn't take frilly panties and such for them to be sensitive and caring yet totally manly. To be perfectly honest I feel a lot safer with my big strong masculine guy than I would with one who complains about not being able to wear a dress in pubic, wants to wear my clothes , or shouts his protests from the inside of a closet. Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against cross dressing, but it does absolutely nothing for me. it strikes me as funny how the cd's in here complain more about men than the gg's and according you all, 85% are straight. WTF?

I see your point. You can see much of this here, people who have accepting SO that come here and complain about their SO using their clothes without permission, calling them "he" instead of "she", not letting use specific wardrobes while in public...

No one wants to be close to a whiner, and I sometimes see too much whining and self pity in CDs. To be too much self-centered can also be annoying. Being too obsessed about looks can show that a person is insecure. And watching an unattractive overweight aged man in the streets using a mini skirt that not even young girls would use, is kind of repulsive.

All this is not attractive to a woman, and can be perceived as creepy. Specially if you mix some of the above examples...

[Rogina B]

If you try to act and dress to blend in as a woman, even if you are a non-passable TS or CD, you should do fine.

What most people find "creepy" is when someone seems to want to publicly display their fetishes. If you are decently dressed, everything covered, honest effort on your looks, people probably won't even notice you. It is when you get these TS or CD who walk around with their butt hanging out of a too-short mini skirt or whatever that draws attention.



Yeah but basically it is the public display of fetishes that bothers people. Not so much the gender variance.

I agree completely! Fetish dressers when outside of clubs or private venues put the rest of us in a bad light.I don't care to be anywhere near these people...let them have the attention while I pass by unnoticed. But the image of the fetish dresser will stick in the minds of all that saw the "big trannie in the too tight minnie,with platform laceup boots" forever!!:2c:

[gemsay32]

I'm not sure why you think most woman would think CD's are creepy. If anything, it's unattractive. Some woman might not like it if their man doesn't want to be a man because they want a man, not a woman. If they wanted a woman, they'd be with one.

I know that for me.. I once was in a goodwill looking in the woman's section for particular types of clothing... (When I first did that it took a great sum of will and courage to attempt it. I knew that people would give me funny looks. Some younger people made comments about me. I knew people would think it was weird. However, I didn't care. My appetite needed to be quenched.) ..... One of the ladies that moved stuff around and worked at the cashier came over next to one of the racks nearby and grabbed one of the peices of clothing I had just looked at. I don't know if she was paying attention to what I was doing, but she lifted it up and asked the other coworker how it looked??? Then she put it back on the rack and resumed whatever she was doing. I felt so embarrased and did my best to ignore it and get what I wanted so I could leave. Anyway, that's what I've done in public. I haven't done that for years and don't plan to. For me this "hobby" is purely for sexual fun. I'm not trying to be a woman, nor do I want to be one. I do my best to hide it precisely because I'm not trying to creep anyone out. I have to try things to learn though and that means I make mistakes.

I'll admit though that I have no interest in being a hairy smelly sweating shirtless grunting muscleman. I'm more of the metro-type. I like being thin and being free. I mostly like who I am. A lot of woman don't like metro-sexuals because they're not attracted to it, but some are ok with it. I will say that metro-sexuals are not woman stuck inside a mans body. They're just males with a deeper appreciation for things on both sides of life. Why limit yourself to one thing? I could say the same thing for CD's. They're like explorers. We're all explorers in life, we're just in different places doing different things. We don't always understand eachother or understand the motives of one another. Sometimes we let fear get the best of us. Then again, this diversity is what makes life interesting - just so long as noeone gets hurt.

If anyone asked me what would be my ideal body I'd have to say something efficient, sleek, refined, and fast. I wouldn't say male or female. Is that creepy? Why? For the most part, males and females have issues. If you're going to have kids, you need a reproductive system and this means a lot of hassle. I'd go without one if I could. I guess to some extent, what scares people about CD's could be what scares them about gays. For example if everyone was gay we wouldn't have any children, correct? If all men wanted to be woman, we wouldn't have any men and wouldn't have any children. The bottom line is, we all live in fear too much and make broad generalizations too often. If you don't know that someone trully has ill intentions to harm someone, then don't feed those fears. There're more than enough men and woman in this world that want nothing else other than to be exactly what they were born as. There's no shortage of children, either. There's plenty of room for a bit of divergence, as long as it's peaceful in nature.

[Jenny Brown]

Seriously, I haven't really met a woman yet that would classify me as creepy (or greepy ). And yes, I certainly do wear "their" unmentionables.
And do you really think SA's and the women you meet in public aren't saying anything at all about you when your back is turned?

[Alice Torn]

When people, including gg's, say "its That Guy", uh-oh!

[Jamie001]

They are probably saying "how nice you look" to other sales associates after you leave.


And do you really think SA's and the women you meet in public aren't saying anything at all about you when your back is turned?

[Jenny Brown]

They are probably saying "how nice you look" to other sales associates after you leave.
If you buy things - absolutely they're going to say "how nice you look". But after you leave, do you really truly believe they're saying that?

[skirtsuit]

If you buy things - absolutely they're going to say "how nice you look". But after you leave, do you really truly believe they're saying that?

Of course people say things behind our backs but you're being far too cynical.

How do you know some of them aren't saying nice things about us?

Lili, a makeup person at the Nordstrom's in the King of Prussia Mall probably wouldn't have told me that several of her coworkers approached her to say how good I looked unless it really happened. Yes I bought some expensive Dior makeup from her and will do so again, but she doesn't have to make up stories to get me back because she was soooo nice to me in person that I want to go back anyway.

It is not hard to tell the difference between a person doing their job and just being polite and someone who is really interested and happy to deal with you as you are. When I was in Cinema II (a very nice wig store on S. Broad ) the women who looked me in the eye and told me how nice I looked were not just doing it for a laugh - I could tell they meant it. Hell, one of them, an older lady customer offered to give me a ride as we were leaving!

Would the 42 YO GG manager of the Sephora store on Chestnut readily accept my offer for a 'girls' lunch if she and her coworkers were laughing at me behind my back?

When I got my ears pierced, the 2 super cute teenage girls working at Clare's were absolutely wonderful, chatting and laughing with me. I'm a middle aged guy, but I know enough about cute teen agers to know that they would not be able to pretend that well. If they had been creeped out by me it would have shown.

I could go on and on. I'm sure people do talk about me but I believe a lot of it is probably positive, mostly because I'm really nice and super good looking!

All the Best,
Ann / SS

[sissystephanie]

In my 60 plus years of crossdressing I have never heard a comment from a GG indicating she thought I was creepy! If such thoughts were uttered behind my back, so what!!

What I have heard is pretty much the opposite! During my 60 plus years I have spent many hours trying on various types of clothing, everything from the skin out. SA's have seen me in panties and bra, and completely dressed! I have been fitted for a bra on many occasions, in more than one store! The only type of comments from them is about how nice I looked!:) One SA, from whom I was buying a dress, begged me to tell her where I purchased the pretty panty and bra set I was wearing. And yes, she did know I was a man!! Pretty hard to disguise that when you are standing there in your panties!:heehee:

Early in out marriage some of our friends knew I CD'ed. Some of the ladies had been on shopping trips with my wife and I. So they also had seen my lingerie. No comments, other than compliments.

I think if you act creepy, you will be regarded as creepy! When I am dressed, I always try to act as though I belong in that clothing. I don't dress in outlandish clothing, in order to draw attention! I dress to please myself, not everyone else!

[Rogina B]

If you buy things - absolutely they're going to say "how nice you look". But after you leave, do you really truly believe they're saying that?

So,the T girl being in the store gave them something to talk about..so what!!It doesn't mean they feel the T girl is a creep.Some might be very jealous...we can fix our trucks and do our makeup!!!:2c:

[Jenny Brown]

Look, you're most certainly entitled to believe whatever you want. But I have a very hard time believing that some of you are so naive as to really think these SA's don't talk about you behind your back. It's human nature.
People will say one thing to your face but when you're gone - it's a completely different story. They get paid to make you feel good and make sales. But hey, if it works for you - that's all that matters, Right?


Of course people say things behind our backs but you're being far too cynical.

How do you know some of them aren't saying nice things about us?

Lili, a makeup person at the Nordstrom's in the King of Prussia Mall probably wouldn't have told me that several of her coworkers approached her to say how good I looked unless it really happened. Yes I bought some expensive Dior makeup from her and will do so again, but she doesn't have to make up stories to get me back because she was soooo nice to me in person that I want to go back anyway.

It is not hard to tell the difference between a person doing their job and just being polite and someone who is really interested and happy to deal with you as you are. When I was in Cinema II (a very nice wig store on S. Broad ) the women who looked me in the eye and told me how nice I looked were not just doing it for a laugh - I could tell they meant it. Hell, one of them, an older lady customer offered to give me a ride as we were leaving!

Would the 42 YO GG manager of the Sephora store on Chestnut readily accept my offer for a 'girls' lunch if she and her coworkers were laughing at me behind my back?

When I got my ears pierced, the 2 super cute teenage girls working at Clare's were absolutely wonderful, chatting and laughing with me. I'm a middle aged guy, but I know enough about cute teen agers to know that they would not be able to pretend that well. If they had been creeped out by me it would have shown.

I could go on and on. I'm sure people do talk about me but I believe a lot of it is probably positive, mostly because I'm really nice and super good looking!

All the Best,
Ann / SS

[skirtsuit]

Jenny -
What part of this leads you to think I'm naive?


Originally Posted by skirtsuit
Of course people say things behind our backs but you're being far too cynical.

Read the new thread on the Dress Barn in the Clothing Talk section. Do SAs normally ask customers out to diner, or are they just out for the sale?

I'll say it again - Of course people talk behind our backs.


All the Best,
Ann / SS

[victoriamwilliams1]

I think if you seen it on television where the shows are produced to give a negative to one extreme while giving a positive on a dog of a man.

For the most part it is about how you carry yourself! For me women have not been an issue in public and I think it is on how I present myself publicly.

The creepy feeling is when they see a full bearded man dressed using the ladies room!

[linnea]

I don't have much experience with this, but so far I have not found that women find crossdressers and transexuals to be creepy. Of course, some must feel this way, but that's really a "bell-curve" kind of thing. For the most part, I think that women are pretty accepting and supportive of CDs.

[EveMarie]

Wow, talk about getting on the bus after the gate is shut (or how ever that saying goes), stay away for a bit and you fall way behind. Anyway, I've had a few "professionals" rationalize that GG's see us as no threat to their world (more so for gay men), but CD's, at least in my case, find that most women see me more as a curiosity than any kind of "creepy" person. and if I get to know them long enough prove my innocence, and that I'm harmless to their world. When I'm out socializing I usually find myself surrounded by more Gay and Lesbian people than straight, so I just enjoy:heehee:

p.s. I buy and wear my own "unmentionables":o

[kelliboots]

I wonder if Nature has any effect? The need to reproduce the human race and competition for a mate. Could be they see us as competition...lol.

[Wendy Green]

I bought two pairs of high heels this Halloween and the sales associates seemed to enjoy helping me. They really liked seeing me walk around in them.
I don't think they thought I was creepy. They asked me to come back completely dressed.

[Danielle H]

I wonder if Nature has any effect? The need to reproduce the human race and competition for a mate. Could be they see us as competition...lol.

No, that's not it. Most GGs I know don't regard gay guys as creepy, in fact most of them love their gay friends.

[Sammy777]

Well lets take a long hard look at some things considered normal or OK in the CD universe shall we?

Cross dressing in general -
If you want to wear a dress n heels fine go right ahead, but either do it proudly with your beard [as a man in a dress] or do everything and try to look and act like a real girl.
But for frack sakes, don't plaster 10lbs of makeup on top of a 10 o'clock shadow and have a hairy body with 44DDD's covered with a tube top and equally hairy legs barely covered by a micromini skirt that looks more like a belt and then try to tell me, or anyone else your a lady.

You want to dress and act like Brittney Spears fine - but if your not 22 or just don't have the body for it then Please keep it to yourself and at home.

Breasts -
What is with all the talk about getting breasts???
Come on - Really?? What the f*ck are you thinking?
Unless you are a full-time cd'er or a ts you don't need breasts.

And what are you going to do when you get them??
Ask questions like - can I hide 45 DD's under a sweat shirt while at work??
Or maybe ask the transguys how to bind them during the week

I may want breasts, [because I'm a TS that's why]
but not because I think they would be cool to have or fun to play with.

Relationships -
There seems to be an overload of whiney its all about me me me posts lately.

Here I am pretty much avoiding a relationship right now because I don't want to heap all this transitioning crap I'm going through onto some poor unsuspecting person yet all I see are posts about how you are the victim all the time.
Never do you hear someone say YES it is all my fault, I take full responsibility and I am sorry for putting my wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever through all of this. And I learned my lesson and will not do it again. Nope, just all back to me me me, with a new SO and how do I tell them its been XX months now.

Shopping -
Either say proudly - YES this is for me, or use the present for a SO or whatever other excuse you may or may not need to get you through the day.
But don't spend an hour in a store pawing through thongs with a look of - I left my overcoat in my double parked blacked out windowless van outside.
Oh - and the "I get stares while in the woman's section - BS!, and I will tell you why, next time your in the mens section take a look at how many stares women get from other men for being there. They don't just stroll in without no one caring, you just don't notice it, or even think your doing it when you give a woman a look while waiting for her to get out of your way to shop. Think about it.

Dressing -
In short - dress your age - or just go sooooo over the top you cant help but to be looked at, at then be proud of it, don't try and do both, or again weight 285lbs while trying to pull off a Brittney schoolgirl look and NOT expect to get looked at.

Clothes -
Figure out your size - 2 sizes 2 small is never a good look, and for fracks sake buy your own clothes - nothing says creepy x100 to a girl then to have her walk into a room and seeing you wearing her clothes.
Never come between a girl and her wardrobe, never, lol.
That is like borrowing your friends snap-on tools without asking. :D

Most women I see have little to no problem with CD'ers, if its done well or at least with a genuine effort.

Was this helpful hints or just a late night rant? That is for you to decide, :lol2:

Disclaimer: I am not saying what I wrote pertains to every CD'er, these are just my observations from this site and my thoughts regarding them. Some may pertain to you, some may not.

[DaphneGrey]

What Samantha said!!!!

[paulaW]

Eh, probably just afraid we're gonna raid their wardrobes!!:devil:

[CLARRISA]

I'm sure not so long ago i stumbled on a you tube video and this girl said that crossdressers are creepy...till this one made me feel a lot better....ok i don't agree or condone with everything she says but she is accepting and definetely doesn't appear creeped out..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5leE9B_Hzkk

[Sammy777]

This could be the proof as to why -

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/cBLbKq60FhI&hl=en&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/cBLbKq60FhI&hl=en&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Ya - WoW - Talk about someone getting ready to feed Peaches and tell the girl in the basement to put the lotion on the skin.

[Ugly Michele]

I wonder if Nature has any effect? The need to reproduce the human race and competition for a mate. Could be they see us as competition...lol.

I feel many do. I'm not, but don't mind if a guy whistles.

[Bethany_Anne_Fae]

This could be the proof as to why -


Ya - WoW - Talk about someone getting ready to feed Peaches and tell the girl in the basement to put the lotion on the skin.

Yep.... serious creepy factor there.

and your first post... spot on!

*hugs*
Zarabeth

[Karen564]

Well lets take a long hard look at some things considered normal or OK in the CD universe shall we?

Cross dressing in general -
If you want to wear a dress n heels fine go right ahead, but either do it proudly with your beard [as a man in a dress] or do everything and try to look and act like a real girl.
But for frack sakes, don't plaster 10lbs of makeup on top of a 10 o'clock shadow and have a hairy body with 44DDD's covered with a tube top and equally hairy legs barely covered by a micromini skirt that looks more like a belt and then try to tell me, or anyone else your a lady.

You want to dress and act like Brittney Spears fine - but if your not 22 or just don't have the body for it then Please keep it to yourself and at home.

Breasts -
What is with all the talk about getting breasts???
Come on - Really?? What the f*ck are you thinking?
Unless you are a full-time cd'er or a ts you don't need breasts.

And what are you going to do when you get them??
Ask questions like - can I hide 45 DD's under a sweat shirt while at work??
Or maybe ask the transguys how to bind them during the week

I may want breasts, [because I'm a TS that's why]
but not because I think they would be cool to have or fun to play with.

Relationships -
There seems to be an overload of whiney its all about me me me posts lately.

Here I am pretty much avoiding a relationship right now because I don't want to heap all this transitioning crap I'm going through onto some poor unsuspecting person yet all I see are posts about how you are the victim all the time.
Never do you hear someone say YES it is all my fault, I take full responsibility and I am sorry for putting my wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, whatever through all of this. And I learned my lesson and will not do it again. Nope, just all back to me me me, with a new SO and how do I tell them its been XX months now.

Shopping -
Either say proudly - YES this is for me, or use the present for a SO or whatever other excuse you may or may not need to get you through the day.
But don't spend an hour in a store pawing through thongs with a look of - I left my overcoat in my double parked blacked out windowless van outside.
Oh - and the "I get stares while in the woman's section - BS!, and I will tell you why, next time your in the mens section take a look at how many stares women get from other men for being there. They don't just stroll in without no one caring, you just don't notice it, or even think your doing it when you give a woman a look while waiting for her to get out of your way to shop. Think about it.

Dressing -
In short - dress your age - or just go sooooo over the top you cant help but to be looked at, at then be proud of it, don't try and do both, or again weight 285lbs while trying to pull off a Brittney schoolgirl look and NOT expect to get looked at.

Clothes -
Figure out your size - 2 sizes 2 small is never a good look, and for fracks sake buy your own clothes - nothing says creepy x100 to a girl then to have her walk into a room and seeing you wearing her clothes.
Never come between a girl and her wardrobe, never, lol.
That is like borrowing your friends snap-on tools without asking. :D

Most women I see have little to no problem with CD'ers, if its done well or at least with a genuine effort.

Was this helpful hints or just a late night rant? That is for you to decide, :lol2:

Disclaimer: I am not saying what I wrote pertains to every CD'er, these are just my observations from this site and my thoughts regarding them. Some may pertain to you, some may not.

Excellent!!

Rant or no rant, it's all true..

And finally at the very least an very honest post saying it as it is, which I also just so happen to agree with..

:hugs:

[Lorileah]

Yay Samantha! and that does not just pertain to TG's, take responsibility for your actions. You break something don't say it was built badly. You get a speeding ticket don't say everyone else was doing it. In my thread I am trying to get Tg's in general to stand up. say "look at me!" It is like history does indeed repeat itself but with a new minority. Things tend to grow and thrive when brought into the light. Things wither and die in the dark. This illogical feeling that one cannot wear a beard and a dress is just that illogical

[Amy Hepker]

This subject is kinda hard to see from our point of view, but really, I do believe that most, not all Females grow up with their Ideal Man in mind. It does not include a Man that wears Female clothing, and when girls are young they are in the "ewwww that is creepy" sence. I am not saying all girls go through this growing up, but I do believe that most do. I heard my GGfriend the other day talking to a Lady she worked with and is good friends with, I heard her friend on the phone say, "Is he OK, he's not wierd or anything is he?" Of course she said "no" (she does know but has never seen me dressed) I believe the problem is a peer pressure thing really. I mean us as guys have talked with other guys saying "what kind of girl do you like?" Well, the girls do the samething and then they get into "some guys are so wierd, yea they wear womens clothes and all kinds of crap." and of course no woman really wants a man that beats her or runs her into the ground as a tramp. But the Guys beating their wives or girlfriends is not as bad as the wierdo that wears womens clothes.

Now, don't get me wrong, I know there are a lot of Ladies out there that know about and work around guys that wear womens clothes, but ask one of them if they would ever marry one, and if she says "yes" then ask her to say it in front of her Peers. She won't do it. She would no longer be Jane, but rather the wierd girl that wants her guys dressed like women. It is a very strange thing, and Males do have it ruffer than Females when it comes to crossdressing. Recently there was a vote around here about discrimination of crossdressers. One politician said "I don't want to see Tom come in one day in a dress and the next day in a mans suite, it would be to disruptive in a job enviroment." Yet, Females can do this any day all the time and no one says anything. I someday hope that it will change and will not be this way, but I do not see it happening in my lifetime.

[MsJoann]

Great thread going here!
I wear women's clothing every day, even to work. (self employed).
In the summer, always short shorts with ladies sneakers and usually a toned-down shirt.
My negative experiences recently have been with a two female cashiers at a local convenience store on my everyday morning stops for coffee. One in particular makes it very clear that she stares at my clothing, shoes and legs. No comments were made but rather her attitude is clearly visible and rather snotty. Believe me, all of us can pick up those kind of vibes.
Several times, especially if I go a bit overboard with the clothes.... she will clearly address me with a loud SIR!
I do believe that some women think that we are "strange" for not wearing the appropriate clothing. I dress this way normally and I don't show signs of nervousness for them to pick up on. I'm rather casual about it.
I recently received an anonymous note in the mail at my office. Inside was a magazine article clipping regarding men who wear short-shorts and tights! There was handwriting on the clipping asking me to ignore the text of the clipping, and, that (we) love your legs.
Along with this was another note stating that "we've been watchin' you"....signed, "the girlz in your hood" followed by 3 hearts!
Now if there was something creepy, that would be it!

[Jamie001]

Yes Amy, women come dresses either fem or masculine all of the time. You can see this everywhere, but it is really important to understand that male crossdressing is not the same. The reason it is different is that when Jane puts on male clothing and comes into the office, she is not pretending to be male. That is the big difference! You can still tell that she is female. That is the main reason that I believe my form of crossdressing which includes simply incorporating female clothing and items into my otherwise male appearance is more acceptable to society. I am not attempting to make anyone believe that I am female. I am simply incorporating fem items into my look just as many women incorporate male clothing items into their look. Does this make sense?

:2c: Jamie

Amy stated:

It is a very strange thing, and Males do have it ruffer than Females when it comes to crossdressing. Recently there was a vote around here about discrimination of crossdressers. One politician said "I don't want to see Tom come in one day in a dress and the next day in a mans suite, it would be to disruptive in a job enviroment." Yet, Females can do this any day all the time and no one says anything. I someday hope that it will change and will not be this way, but I do not see it happening in my lifetime.

[kellycan27]

Appearances can be deceiving. If you feel “safe” with your big, strong, masculine guy, that’s OK, but keep in mind that he (like most males) is bluffing his way through life on perceived strength. I speak from experience – I’ve been among these supposedly “strong” males my whole life, and they are as insecure as the rest of us. I wish you well…:straightface:



I am not sure what your interaction with these "supposedly" strong men has been, but let me tell you this. I am not some fuzzy, frilly, obedient little girl who gets weak in the knees because some guy shows interest. I have definite ideas of what I am looking for in a guy, and he better be able to tow the line. He needs to be able to handle himself if he ever has hopes of handling me. I am not talking just physical strength, I am talking strength of character, self confidence, honesty,compassion,caring and kindness.
Insecure as the rest of us? Not me! I m very secure in myself and with what I am. A guy may try and bluff, but if he doesn't have the traits that I have mentioned he'll soon out himself,just by virtue of trying to keep up with me, and my beliefs. No need for you to wish me luck.. I make my own.:straightface:

Kelly

[Amy Hepker]

Jamie,
I understand what you are saying, but who is to say that Jane is not trying to be a man that day. See, we never know and we never will know how that Female feels when she dresses like a Male, I mean she could go back and forth and no one would say anything either. Who's to say the guy that comes in in a dress is trying to be female that day, maybe he just wants to do it.

[lissetta]

I bought two pairs of high heels this Halloween and the sales associates seemed to enjoy helping me. They really liked seeing me walk around in them.
I don't think they thought I was creepy. They asked me to come back completely dressed.

I bought a pair of shoes this halloween and the sales girls said the same thing.

[Sammy777]

What Samantha said!!!!



Yep.... serious creepy factor there.
and your first post... spot on!
*hugs* Zarabeth


Excellent!!
Rant or no rant, it's all true..

And finally at the very least an very honest post saying it as it is, which I also just so happen to agree with..
:hugs:


Yay Samantha!
and that does not just pertain to TG's, take responsibility for your actions. You break something don't say it was built badly. You get a speeding ticket don't say everyone else was doing it. In my thread I am trying to get Tg's in general to stand up. say "look at me!" It is like history does indeed repeat itself but with a new minority. Things tend to grow and thrive when brought into the light. Things wither and die in the dark. This illogical feeling that one cannot wear a beard and a dress is just that illogical

Thank you all for your kind words and support :D :love: