Can't QUIT it is HARDER then I Thought

[Cool Stacy]

Well if any of you ladys know my story. I was trying to quit dressing. I even purged and burned all my stuff. Well then there is Ebay. I now have new breast forms , four nice dresses and a new wig on its way. I am going CRAZY. Why is this so hard to shake. I cannot not wait for my new stuff.I still need to get nylons and makeup but I will get that local. This makes life so complex with a kid and all. Well type to you ladys soon. By the way everyone on this forum has been looking FABULOUS!!!!!

[Elle1946]

You can't shake it because that is who you are. Just enjoy who you are!

[DiannaRose]

I don't have any advice to offer, Stacy...but I can tell you I wouldn't be able to quit if I tried. I did try, in fact, but it just wasn't possible. It's too much a part of who I am, I now realize. So I embrace it, keep it hidden from my family, and enjoy Dianna as fully as I can.

:)

[Amy Hepker]

You cannot hide from yourself, silly.

You will only be able to handle yourself when you finally accept yourself, all of yourself both sides.

[Rebecca Jayne]

Never Burn always donate if you must!

Next time send your s*** to me.

[Karen564]

Many purge & quit, some do it many times over, but one thing I know for sure is they'll always come back & usually with a need to make up for lost time..

It's sad, but true, so maybe it's best to learn to live with it..

Oh, PS, Welcome Back!!!

:hugs:

[trisha59]

To paraphrase an old joke, Quitting crossdressing is the easiest thing in the world to do. Iv'e done it hundreds of times.

[Jaclyn NM]

We are who we are, which is crossdressers, so stop trying to quit, it won't work, and stop purging, because it's way too expensive.

[AmberLynn]

IM telling you, quitting is impossable imop. and purgeing is costly. if you feel a need to escape a purge hit the under the bed storage or a spot in the attic :hugs:

[Marcia Blue]

I second that purging is costly. I have purged, only to have to replace every thing. Next time the urge to purge hits you, just pack up all you fem stuff and put in hiding.

[sherri]

Hmm, well, I know two people personally who quit and never looked back. One about a year ago, the other five years ago. Actually I think I know of three but I've lost track of one so I can't say for sure that it stuck. I think it's silly to say it can't be done. We can do lots of things if we have to. Fortunately, most of us don't have to. Nevertheless, never say never, I always say. You never know what life's gonna throw at ya.

[Kari Lynn Franks]

I tried so many times it's not even funny. I would get depressed and then i finaly realized that dressing is half of my personality so I quit trying to kill that half and just except it I wish you the best of luck and maybe you will learn to coexist with both sides

[Heather J]

I agree with everyone on this one. I've purged several times over the years. But I've finaly learned and accepted that "it" never goes away and that purging is just a wast of time and money (unless you want a new wardrob) :heehee:.

[kay_jessica]

Stacey,

Don't waste your time or money purging. It is you! From the few pics that you have posted (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103454 ) you look great. You have great potential, and you're still quite young. Embrace your gift and enjoy it. You'll probably regret it as you get older if you do not. CDing is getting more and more acceptable, many more people are aware of us generically and basically say so what!

So enjoy your new gear and and let us see some more pics.

Hugs

Kay

[stefanie]

i don't think one can ever really quit. I think it is always in you. What and how you portray yourself on the outside may simply be a suppression of who we are on the inside.

[Jenniferpl]

Been down that road before. I have learned to accept and embrace it. It refuses to go away. In the long run, I discovered that purging is just a waste of time and money.

[Princess Chantal]

I know that I'll probably get plastered for asking this question, but what the hey...
Have you tried to keep your spare time occupied with doing other things like hobbies, exercising, house repairs or renovations?
From my own experience, I find that the more I keep busy the less I crossdress. It's getting to the time of the year where I usually have no time to crossdress or even think of it.

[erickka]

Embrace and enjoy the real you. Crossdressing is at least somewhat a part of all of us. IMO, it is who we are, not what we are.

[Kate Simmons]

The clothing , etc. can be replaced although it can be expensive. What cannot be replaced or supplanted is our dual nature which will always surface regardless. Learning to manage that is a challenge and requires skill and daring. Definately not for the faint of heart but quite satisfying once it is accomplished.:)

[AlisonRenee]

I've quit too. Several times. I suppose that I could "quit" for real, if there was no alternative, but I know I'd be denying who I am.

Who among you remembers dressing for the first time as a really young child, and what you felt when you did it? I was about four and I remember something close to euphoria.

[kelliboots]

I don't think you can "purge" your feelings and lock em out. I think it comes back twice as hard and the fog settles in again. Besides "it is cheaper to keep her" than purge and buy all new stuff.

[Brenda Freeman]

I have purged, I go in cycles from wanting (or needing) to dress often to long periods of not wanting to! I have learned to not purge because I have given outfits away that I dearly miss,just box it up and see what happens because the urge does come back for me! I also have kids though only one is still at home, My cross dressing is clearly part of me, my love of womens things is part of me, I do not let it get in the way of being a parent and husband ! But it is part of who I am what I like and part of how I enjoy life! If the other option is being miserable no thanks!

[SabrinaDubh]

I know that I'll probably get plastered for asking this question, but what the hey...
Have you tried to keep your spare time occupied with doing other things like hobbies, exercising, house repairs or renovations?
From my own experience, I find that the more I keep busy the less I crossdress. It's getting to the time of the year where I usually have no time to crossdress or even think of it.

While I don't purge anymore, or even tell myself that I am quitting or taking a break, I find that the busier I am the less I crossdress. Currently I have a new house, and a baby taking up alot of my time as well as my other hobby of medieval recreation. It's not that I don't want to CD... I just can't find the time!

But I don't "quit" anymore. It just doesn't work for me.

[Nadia-Maria]

I think it's silly to say it can't be done. We can do lots of things if we have to. Fortunately, most of us don't have to. Nevertheless, never say never, I always say. You never know what life's gonna throw at ya.

I believe you are perfectly right, although obviously not within the flow...

Some people even can do "impossible" things provided that they have the right motivation at doing them.

In french language we have this saying : "impossible n'est pas français !".
I am convinced that's not english either !

[Elizebeth]

I gave up on quitting.

[sherri52]

I am what I am and that's all that I am, a crossdresser from where ever I am.

[joandher]

Purging??? well you can ,but its always at the back of your mind and it comes back with vengeance,and more costs
It seems the older I get the more the urge to dress,it must be the hormones charging about

:hugs: J-JAY

[sterling12]

A brief message to our Moderators:

"Can we somehow have The Computer Key-in on The Words PURGE, and QUITING." Then, each time we get a Thread like this one, the original writer can be directed to about one thousand other messages on here that have said The Same thing!

I know it sounds like we just "want to have company," when we chant: "You can't quit, it's a part of your psyche," but that's The Simple Truth. Your rational brain will fight your emotions each and every time you try to short-circuit The System.

And truthfully, if your brain still thinks about things femme...you haven't "quit anything." You have merely abstained from wearing clothing! Your brain is still transgendered.

Sounds rather bleak, doesn't it? We just condemned you to a life of stress and angst. But, that's true only if you refuse to embrace the unique individual that you are. Your different, and so is everybody else. Time to pick up The Pieces, lose The feelings of guilt because you failed. Simply put, you didn't fail....you just didn't "redesign" because there was nothing wrong with The Original!

Always look at life as a continuum. Ask yourself a simple question: "In a few weeks, in a few years, after I'm dead and gone, will any of this make one smidgen of difference in The Universe?" See....it isn't so bad after all!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Jessinthesprings]

Well if any of you ladys know my story. I was trying to quit dressing. I even purged and burned all my stuff. Well then there is Ebay. I now have new breast forms , four nice dresses and a new wig on its way. I am going CRAZY. Why is this so hard to shake. I cannot not wait for my new stuff.I still need to get nylons and makeup but I will get that local. This makes life so complex with a kid and all. Well type to you ladys soon. By the way everyone on this forum has been looking FABULOUS!!!!!

Hey! Is there a reason for the purge? For most of us it don't work. I think it's time you come to accept this side or yourself. hideing it and pretending that you are not transgendered is not good for you are those around you. Just enjoy it and be yourself. There is absolutly nothing wrong with this despite what the bigots say.

[Natalie de Valley]

It is easier to accept rather than prolong, it is apart of who we are. Quiting just makes it harder.

[Joanne f]

Can't QUIT it is HARDER then I Thought
Now that is a big surprise to hear ,:nailbiting::lol2:

[Cool Stacy]

Well you all give good advice. My wife kinda knows I dressed up in womens clothes. I tell yea I tried it but I do not do it anymore. I do wanna tell her. But I don't want her to think of me as any less a man. When I am not dressed I think about it but I am stiil me. When I am dressed I wanna be a Women all the way I love it. I so badly want her to come home from work one day and meet Stacy. But I think she would freak. I think it would be fun. I have a 6 month old now also so I do not want him to see me dressed. Purgeing does cost allot of money I am up to like $200.00 dollars already and I don't even have makeup or nylons yet. This is so helpfull having you ladys to talk with. Thank You.

[girlalex]

honestly just the thoughts of cross dressing and how much i think i like curtain men really gets in my life but i can't do anything about it because my feminine side is simply more dominant. and the older i get the more i become myself.

[Amy Hepker]

The only good thing about a purge is going shopping to buy more, that is if you have the money.

[Kitty Sue]

Hey Stacy, I feel ya. Purging is horrid. I purged for the first time in more than 8 years last year. I though I was done purging. The clothes do not make me crossdress, they are only clothes. I crossdress as it is part of who I am.

Acceptance takes time. I suppose if I really wanted to I could try hypnotherapy, but deep down I do not think I really want to quit. I am just afraid that people will not accept me. More than that I need to accept myself. Nobody is harder on me, than me.

I need to remember that I am not hurting anybody. I am not alone, and being CD/TV etc does not make me bad.

I don't know if you can identify with any of that or not. I am glad you are here and thanks for your honesty. It gives me hope and shows I am not alone, KS.

[Amy Hepker]

I am not a crossdresser, I just dress like a Male because my body looks like one, I am female inside.

[simplykaelyn]

I've purged twice now and finding heels in a 14+ is harder than it used to be.

I've accepted that Kaelyn won't be denied for long. From now on I will just store my things instead of throwing them away.
I wish I had all that stuff back.

[Stephanie Stephens]

My parents did not raise a quitter.

[Ugly Michele]

My parents did not raise a quitter.

LOL Stehanie, same here.

[Carly D.]

I can find more reasons not to dress now.. but I know better than to purge to "0".. I know that every time I get the urge to empty out my clothes that it's just a sign to chill.. take a step back.. "don't shake that baby" as they say when the baby gets to be too much.. just hide the clothes, put them in the attic, put them somewhere just DON'T TOSS THEM..

[sheidelmeidel]

I believe the urge to purge is the same as the urge to dress, just the opposite. If you want to avoid wild swings of pink fog and then guilt, I think you should learn to accept yourself and not purge. Just put your stuff away so it is very hard to get at. You will feel like you are on the road to quitting and save yourself money and grief when the next fog rolls in.

[AlisonRenee]

Do you ever ask yourself "when am I really crossdressing" - is it when I put on guy clothes, or girl clothes?

[Sarah_new]

I've purged before and then some time later regretted it because I got rid of stuff I liked then I cant find replacements I like.

I appreciate that things in life change and that may trigger a desire to purge, but other things may trigger a desire to come back to this. We never now whats around the corner for any of us.

I not sure I'm helping a great deal, but one thing for sure you're not alone Stacey, many of us have done this before and no doubt will do it in the future. For some of us it appears to be part of the journey.