Told my wife, at last

[anouk]

This morning I told my wife at last. First I served her coffee in bed and gave her a letter. There I explained the basic facts about my crossdressiing and told her how much I love her. After quite a long silence she gave me warm hug that seemed never ending (and I didn't it to stop, either...). And then we gradually started to talk about the issue.

She seems to take it very well, at least at first. I hope it will continue so that it will not be too big burden to her.

Oh, how much I love her!!!

[Melamie2]

Excellent! You seem to have passed the big hurdle and you did it so lovingly. I am so happy for you that your wife is accepting you for who you are. She must be a wonderful woman, good luck!!

[Joanne f]

I think a letter was quite a good idea as it gives your wife chance to read it over again , i hope it go`s well for you both .

[Jonianne]

That is good! I'm glad she is so receptive. I would spend time talking about boundries and groundrules and stick by them so she will feel secure. They give both of you a safe place to play/operate in.

[DaphneGrey]

Thats wonderful. Take it slow at her pace, when she asks questions answer them. Try not to push let her take it all in and let her lead when and as she is comfortable. She sounds wonderful I am so happy for you.

[JoanFlores]

I am so happy for you, now only good thing can happen.

[Samantha Girl]

Congratulations anouk! :) I hope your situation continues to go well ;)

[Andy66]

Yay! That was very brave of you. I'm happy for you that you have a kind, understanding wife; and I'm happy for your wife that she has a loving, honest husband. :love:

[Jessinthesprings]

This morning I told my wife at last. First I served her coffee in bed and gave her a letter. There I explained the basic facts about my crossdressiing and told her how much I love her. After quite a long silence she gave me warm hug that seemed never ending (and I didn't it to stop, either...). And then we gradually started to talk about the issue.

She seems to take it very well, at least at first. I hope it will continue so that it will not be too big burden to her.

Oh, how much I love her!!!

That was the scariest thing I ever did, but in the end the most rewarding. It was very brave and congratulations. Just a little sugguestion, the ball is in her court now so let her come to terms with it and let her set the boundries for now... And as always keep the lines of communication open.

[PretzelGirl]

Congrats Anouk! It sounds like you handled it very well. I am going to "third" the boundaries comments. I think letting her set some and then you abiding by them gives our SOs a sense of safety. If they can say "I can only handle X" and we never stray beyond that, then they can relax and the acceptance settles in better. In my case, I was surpised at how the boundaries started being pulled back over time as the comfort level went up. Good luck!

[trisha254]

Anouk

You are a very brave Gal ,that was a big step , I also I :love:make that move ,and work out I now have and you have alot to look forward .

Trisha

[SuzanneBender]

Congratulations. It sounds like you handled it perfectly. I remember coming out to my bride. It was the most terrifying thing I have ever done in my life.

The girls are right. Don't get overtaken by the pink fog and overwhelm her with your femininity right now. I am sure that she has all kinds of thoughts and worries working through her mind right now. You need to be thoughtful of that. Right now she needs to see that although you are now out you are the same person that she married. True acceptance takes time. Give her as much time as it took you to accept your dressing. Make sure you are discussing boundaries and stick to the rules.

You are so brave girl. Now go get a Pedi to celebrate! :hugs:

[AmberLynn]

grat's and good tactic using the letter. I agree with all the girl's above let it sink in then let her come forward with a few bound's and rule's and keep talking when she want's to so she better understand's :hugs:

[Cheryl T]

What a great way to begin the long journey together...

[Lorileah]

Yay! I am so happy it went well. It shows that you and your wife are really more than just a pair. You really do care for each other. Awesome

[Karen564]

Good for you, that's great!!

But just a word of caution for you, The 1st reaction is usually that of shock & what seems as acceptance which it may, but later after it sinks in & she thinks about it more, dont be surprised if she later expresses some anger issues about it, so just take it slow & calmly and give her reassurance that shes the most important thing in your life that you love & care about..

:hugs:

[anouk]

Good for you, that's great!!

But just a word of caution for you, The 1st reaction is usually that of shock & what seems as acceptance which it may, but later after it sinks in & she thinks about it more, dont be surprised if she later expresses some anger issues about it, so just take it slow & calmly and give her reassurance that shes the most important thing in your life that you love & care about..

:hugs:

Thank you for your advice, you are absolutely right. There will be some other reactions to come and I must be ready for that

[Gennifer]

Anouk,

It sounds like you handled this very well. I wish the best for both you and your wife.

[Fran Moore]

And many more to take on the path to acceptance Anouk, but congratulations, and I'm sure you are feeling much better today, both about yourself and your situation. You have successfully transferred some of the weight of your "mental burden" to your wife, and that has to be a great relief. Her response is to be commended, but as others have stated, the initial response can, and probably will change as time passes. In my opinion the best thing you can do in the short term is to just be "normal" and let her digest and process the information. You may feel as though you would like to dress up and show her how you look in your other "personna", but I would caution against that unless she asks you to do so. I wish you both the best as you continue your journey forward, one small step at a time.

Suzanne:)

[Melanie R]

Anouk,

Glad to hear that your wife took the news so well. Just go slow and give her time to digest. My wife and I will be in Helsinki next Sept. with some other CD friends on a cruise and would love to meet you and your wife - my wife is Dr. Peggy Rudd.

Hugs,

Melanie

[Alice B]

Way to go and it sounds as if your wife is very special. Now just take it slow and easy.

[susant]

Congratulations Anouk, i think you are very brave and that you have a wonderful wife. I wish you every hapiness in the future.

Susan

[Sheila]

congratulations Anouk, am glad it went well for you.:)

Perhaps your wife would like ti chat with other GG's, if so our FAB forum is brilliant, yes we chat about CDing in there but we also have a laugh and a joke or three about life in general :)

[anouk]

Now I have something more to tell you. Something I would never have believed such things can happen to me.

We had two nervous weeks after I told her. Last monday she was so nervous I got really worried. Then on Tuesday she sent me a phone message: "Come home soon, I want to see you as a woman!" My heart took some extra beats, wasn't that too fast for me...

At home I dressed up and did my makeup and called her to upstairs to see me. She looked at mee slowly and showed her acceptance by hugging me a very long time. Then we talked a lot and she told it would be ok for her if I would go out to bars (even though I'm not ready for that myself...), if I shave my body (without my own suggestion...) and planned to go out with Anouk during our trips abroad. Then she gave me a nice basque with panties she had bought me!!!

I was just amazed, how could that kind of day dream come true...??

Now I have epilated my chest, hands and legs, ironed my wrinkeled dresses and put them openly to my drawer, planned to visit a cd club next week,.... and hugged and kissed her every now and then. I just have to take care of her needs, she may be even too supportative. She still feels hurted because I have not told her, but I hope she will come over it gradually, especially, because she has made some contacts with other crossdresser's wives.

So just now I'm propably the happiest man and woman in the whole world!

[linnea]

How wonderful! I am hoping to do this with my wife sometime in the very near future, so I am inspired by your story. Thank you so much and best wishes for you to have greater and greater positive responses from her. It's sounds as if you got off to a very good start.

[Missy Anne's GG]

Anouk,

I am so happy for you! May your good times continue!

Hugs, :hugs:

Anne

[Blaire]

I just have to take care of her needs, she may be even too supportative. She still feels hurted because I have not told her, but I hope she will come over it gradually, especially, because she has made some contacts with other crossdresser's wives.

I suspect that if you focus on taking care of her needs, as you've apparantly always done, the rest will take care of itself. At this point, it's hard to screw up much.

[catriona36]

now, this is what you do..:love:for when she wakes up. not just a bunch, more like a garden :heehee: that is to compliment the breakfast in bed.
She will need it for "her day out" that you are now planing for her ;)
and if there is shopping involved remember it's her day (unless she insists ;) )
Your wife is a special woman. and tho you are excited at whats happened,(as you should be) dont let it get away from you, or let it detract from whats important :hugs:

[Samantha Girl]

Thanks for the amazing update Anouk! :) Sounds like you are both working it out nicely ;) Your wife sounds like just an awesome woman. I hope things continue to go well for you :love:

[Angie G]

That's really good news hun. Just always keep letting her know you love her And go forward real slow as to give her time to absorb all this.:hugs:
Angie

[Sheila]

Anouk, this is great news :) remember to hug her often :) and that if she would like to talk to other GG's our FAB forum is great, we chat about all sorts there not just CDing :)

[WandaRae2009]

It seems that you are quickly getting the acceptance that most of us only wished for.

Proceed slowly and carefully and good luck. I'm sure she still has the desires to be with the "man" she married. It's a delicate balance between both sides to manage. I hope it continues for you. Keep us updated, it's the positive ones that give some of us the hope that or SO's will some day accept.

[anouk]

It seems that you are quickly getting the acceptance that most of us only wished for.

Proceed slowly and carefully and good luck. I'm sure she still has the desires to be with the "man" she married. It's a delicate balance between both sides to manage. I hope it continues for you. Keep us updated, it's the positive ones that give some of us the hope that or SO's will some day accept.

Thanks for your advice, I will be her man as much as she wants. And I will not push her to anything she is not ready.

But on the other hand she really wants to know Anouk better as well. This week she already visited a cd club with me!! There we were welcomed really warm hearted by other sisters and their SO's. Actually we were "the stars of the night", everybody asking us about "our story" and giving many valuable hints and advice for the future. Oh, how a happy moment it was!

[aggi123]

oh anouk, I have to say I'm a tad envious of your courage and how accepting your wife is! I'm so glad that everything is working out great for you. Here's to the road ahead!