No Regrets ...

[Nigella]

... Well just the one

My mother never got to know her other daughter before she left us. :sad:

Do you have any regrets about your choice of lifestyle?

[Karren H]

Choice?? What choice? I didn't choose to be this way..... But since I am.... The only regret I have is that I didn't start going out big time, sooner... And maybe that wouldn't have mattered..

[Persephone]

I completely understand your regret, Nigella. I've thought about that one on occasion.

My biggest ones have to do with not doing some things sooner.

I wish I'd had facial hair laser years before I did (although I'm not sure it had been invented way back when).

I wish I'd lost weight and gotten into better shape years ago. It would have been much more fun to be "sexy" rather than just "old."

But most of all I wish I'd realized that I was a perfectly fine grade A human being years before I did. Carrying around all that guilt for so long is probably what caused my slumped shoulders.

[Alice B]

I think Karren's answer pretty well hits the nail on the head for me. Were my mother still alive I'm sure she would accept Alice. My father would bee another story.

[charlie]

Wow! My regret is that I'm like this in the first place. Explaining (or trying to explain) to my wife why I wear a dress is a tough one! She is ready to leave me half the time, is angry when I dress, and is completely upset about anything CD. It would be great if I never had this part of me. When I married her I was in remission for 17 years. It just started a year and a half ago. Hence, I did not tell her about CD as I thought I was over that long ago. Surprise for both of us!

[Barbara918]

Only regret -- my wife never allowed herself to get to know Barbara.

[Christina Horton]

Choice?? What choice? I didn't choose to be this way..... But since I am.... The only regret I have is that I didn't start going out big time, sooner... And maybe that wouldn't have mattered..

What she said.


How can I regret expressing who I really am? I have not lost my mom or dad yet and they both are OK with it. Mom now more so then dad buy he just wants me to be happy. I would regret NOT sharing this with everybody and not going out as my true self.EH. Now that would be something to regret and kick myself for missing out on.

[SuzanneBender]

I agree with Karren this was not a choice. It was a gift I many of us were born to bear. I have multiple regrets that surround my transgenderism and all of them link to my failure to be brave enough to accept who I was when I was younger.

I envy the young ladies out there that now have the information at their disposal to know they are not alone or freaks. They are just people like many of us whose outside doesn’t always match the inside. I applaud every young lady that I meet that has had the bravery to step out into the light at a young age and let the world know who they really are.

I do wish my Mom had known. It would have had its challeges but I am sure she would have loved to had a daughter.

Youngins take a lesson from us old hags and make sure you follow your heart and don’t listen to your fears.

[Lorileah]

I only regret that which I didn't do and now cannot be done. I make no excuses for who or what I am. I do regret not fighting for more equal treatment before now. I regret hiding because I thought it was wrong to be me. Never regret anything that makes you smile.

[carolinoakland]

My mom got to meet carol, but not before I realized I was a ts not cd. I'd love to talk to her now, but she passed 12 years ago. I wish she'd gotten to know me... I'm so much more the person she said I was now.

[kellycan27]

I regret not have been able to resolve this thing with my dad before he passed. He was a great guy and I miss him dearly.

Kel

[tricia_uktv]

Regretting is pointless. I could regret that I didn't do this earlier, but then I've brought up three beautiful daughters (some of the time!). I think we should just live for the present.

[Carole Cross]

The one regret I have is not having the courage to start my transition 25 years ago, when I was 16. :sad:

[Laura_Stephens]

I didn't choose anything. God made me the way he wanted to.

My mother and my father didn't like me for the "boy" they raised. They certainly would not have liked me as a girl, either.

[Frédérique]

Do you have any regrets about your choice of lifestyle?

My lifestyle chose me, and I’m glad it did – it’s fun to be a girl, albeit a boy, but you know what I mean. :) I like that “boy dresses like a girl and acts like a girl” idea, yet he remains a boy in all but appearance, albeit a sensitive boy with a completely different take on things. I plow that field, as they say here in the Heartland. It’s not subjugation of boyishness per se, more like total gender integration for the benefit of one’s well-being…


I think Karren's answer pretty well hits the nail on the head for me. Were my mother still alive I'm sure she would accept Alice. My father would bee another story.

Same here – my mother would’ve accepted me without reservation, in fact she did, sheltering me from reality in the process, but I think her own life took a turn she didn’t anticipate. I knew my father more intimately than anyone (except my mother), and he also let me be who I wanted to be, encouraging and supporting my artistic endeavours, even building me a little studio. However, I think my crossdressing would have tested his patience, which was in very short supply, regardless of the circumstances…

[Leslie Langford]

I agree with Karren this was not a choice. It was a gift I many of us were born to bear. I have multiple regrets that surround my transgenderism and all of them link to my failure to be brave enough to accept who I was when I was younger.

I envy the young ladies out there that now have the information at their disposal to know they are not alone or freaks. They are just people like many of us whose outside doesn’t always match the inside. I applaud every young lady that I meet that has had the bravery to step out into the light at a young age and let the world know who they really are.

I do wish my Mom had known. It would have had its challeges but I am sure she would have loved to had a daughter.

Youngins take a lesson from us old hags and make sure you follow your heart and don’t listen to your fears.

...and it's not just the mere information that is at the disposal of the younger generation these days - it's the sheer volume of it, and to the point where it's almost in our faces on a daily basis now.

Unlike the U.S. which is still struggling with this issue, gay marriage in Canada has been legal for some time, and hardly a day goes by when someone prominent (especially in the field of arts or politics) doesn't come out of the closet, only to announce that they are about to marry their same sex partner. Ontario Energy and Infrastructure Cabinet Minister George Smitherman is openly gay and married to a man, and just happens to be Deputy Premier of the province as well. And far from being "swishy", he is known to be a pit-bull and has a track record for ramming through whatever legislation he gets his hands on. Oh, yes - he is also planning to run for mayor of Toronto in next year's municipal elections. And no one here even gives any of this a second thought.

Gay characters on television have now gone mainstream (Will and Grace, Sisters, Modern Family etc.), comedian Eddy Izzard goes on talk shows and openly talks about his crossdressing (and the women in the audience find him very sexy). Just today, Chaz Bono of Sonny and Cher fame appeared on "Good Morning America" to talk about his transition towards becoming a man, and segments on individuals who are inter-sexed were featured on both the Dr.Oz and Tyra Banks Shows over the last couple of weeks, including discussions on just how common this condition actually is.

It's almost as if being gay or transgendered is becoming fashionable these days, and people are becoming decidedly more curious about it as well as understanding and accepting. No doubt the fact that so many of us are now totally comfortable going out-and-about, shopping en femme, and being treated so well in stores like Lane Bryant and Dress Barn speaks to this evolving phenomenon.

As for me - I'm lovin' it. Better late than never!

[jenna_woods]

the only reget I have is I did not start sooner, all that time wasted before I found

[AmberLynn]

sadly my one regret is trying to come out to my mother. I think we could have choose better words and desision based on are talk but what was done was done and i will not try to walk thru that door again. it hurt for to long

[trannie T]

I wish I had come out to Mom. I got my first decent dress a few days after she died. She would have been supportive and would have understood.

[CherylFlint]

An ex-wife never knew Cheryl, too bad. Had I to do it over again, I would have told her, wish I had told her. Major regret.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

My biggest "regret" is that back in my earlier life, I did not know what I know

now - when I was 20 (1965), there was very little information about

crossdressing (transvestism, back then) - if I had been able to have the

knowledge that I have gotten from this website alone, my life would have

been different. So much lost time - this is my lament.

JoAnne Wheeler