Therapy

[Spinningjenny]

Hiya,

I'm starting to see a therapist this Friday as my GP (doctor) has advised me to do so prior to an initial assessment with a psychologist. I'm wondering just what exactly a therapist can offer apart from being a friendly stranger to talk to. Can't friends do the same thing? They don't cost the earth either! Forgive me if I'm being naive, I just don't know what to expect.
Thanks,

Jenny

[CharleneT]

Friends are great! They can provide insight and advice, but they normally do so from their view point of you. Therapists are neutral and do some things friends do. Therapists are professionals at it though ... hun, they are actually good at the process of getting you talking - but also telling you what that means in terms of dealing with your problems. OR for that matter, whether or not you even have "problems". They can help you in ways friends can't, because they are not your friends, they can tell you anything they need to and there isn't a concern about "keeping the friendship" or whatever.

[Veronica_Jean]

Jenny,

I agree with Charlene and wanted to add that a good therapist will help you look inside yourself and find the answers to some very difficult questions. Answers only you have, but typically don't have the skills to get past the hurdles on your own.

Friends, as caring as they are, cannot do that.

Veronica

[Stephenie S]

Gender therapy is also the first step towards transition. It's the gender therapist who gives you the referral to an endocrinologist for your hormone therapy. The endo will NOT treat you without a referral. The first surgery letter should come from your therapist. You need a diagnosis. Also experienced gender therapists have a good grasp on the community and it's resouces. My therapist sent me to voice therapy and support groups and other valuable assets in the TG community.

Also, you just might need THERAPY.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[helenr]

all sound advice,but to save time and money, perhaps you can email and quiz these potential wallet thinners if they indeed are experienced with 'what ails you',if I can inject some humor. Maybe even get some 'anonymous' recommendations?
I have met some that are clearly hostile to transgenderism and you don't need to waste time with these discouraging types.
I recognize that 'therapy' is often a required 'entre' to further treatment, but I think for someone who has been transgendered for many years, most of these 'professionals' are still working on chapter 1 and we are way ahead of them-so you end up educating them and you pay their tuition! I am sure this sounds negative, but it is based up personal experience. It would be wonderful to find a caring, competent individual who wasn't biased or judgmental, but their numbers are sadly very few.

[akaCathy]

I must agree with Charlene and Veronica. A good therapist will help you to look into what really drives your soul and what truly matters. They are indispensible if you are on a path to transition. Good luck and only settle for the right therapist for you.

Hugs,

Cate

[luvSophia]

...wanted to add that a good therapist will help you look inside yourself and find the answers to some very difficult questions. Answers only you have, but typically don't have the skills to get past the hurdles on your own.

I would say that is pretty much it in a nutshell. Your therapist should be a part of the medical team, along with your family doctor, that helps you with your transition. Any GOOD therapist should be able to get you started, but at some point you will probably want a good gender therapist if for no other reason than because they will be more familiar with the additional resources you need.

If at all possible see if you can get references from other people who have seen the same therapist. Not all therapy styles will agree with all patients. I know that in my area there are some highly regarded "gender" therapists who practice reparation therapy. And that would been an immediate no-no for me.

[PortiaHoney]

My GP gave me my referral to the Endo so I hope things happen slightly different here in Oz.

This has been a lifelong thing for me so this would mean a trip back to a therapist and further delays - ugh.

If I do have to see a "therapist" I hope my endo will at least start the ball rolling as it has taken far too long to get to this stage as it is.....

:-P HUGGS Portia :-)

[Nicola2876]

I have had one session of therapy and found it a massive help to just talk honestly about my childhood and my feelings without judgement or prejudice. I did a lot of talking and she did a lot of listening. I'm being referred to a specialist but while I wait I'm continuing to see the therapist. This is a tiny step on a long journey for me but feels like a massive stride!

[Angel.Marie76]

I'll chime in here too, basically in chorus with the rest, and say that, depending on your personal situation, Therapy can be useful or as a means to an end. Essentially it's whatever you make of it.

For Transition-related issues, /most/ of the time (a) Therapists input is required to move along. Transition is no light-handed topic, and it's effects on the body as well as the mind of yourself and others can be significant at times. I do realize that counciling doesn't suit everyone's tastes, and certianly can be frustrating for someone who's not very good at opening up about themselves to another. I agree though with one previous statement - FINDING the best Therapist for YOUR needs is key. Having to go through the effort to 'teach' your councilor about TG/TS issues is counter-productive. Sure, it will make you dig deeper into yourself and your experience(s) and show that you're not some lost ship in the pink fog, but only when the person on the listening end of the session is absorbing the material within reasonable timetables. If you find yourself really fighting to qualify your feelings and perspectives, then you need to find someone else to talk to.

Lastly, I've found with a good therapist, that my transition is actually moving along quite nicely, and I don't really need much more guidance, but more someone to check in with every now and then just to make sure I'm not missing something. What has emerged from my sessions, without me even realizing it, is that my time with my son has been more critical than anything else (and also a hotbed), and that because most of details of my life are already in order, my Therapist has focused on my dynamic with him more than anything else. She's helped ground me a bit and pay attention to [the] details of the parent-child relationship, which will hopefully foster a positive transitioning environment. Same goes or family too.

So, you see, even without realizing it, my therapy sessions have given some focus to things that perhaps I might have glossed over and paid the price for, the value of which is immesurable. One can't say that counciling 'fixes' everything, but, at least for me, it's had it's values already. When I'm ready for the rest of the paperwork of my transition, I know the letters are already written - I need only ask for them.