PDA

View Full Version : The "T" group seems to be a fickle one!!



Rogina B
11-26-2009, 08:23 PM
At least here around NE Florida....We have had three get togethers in the last month and so many girls say that they want to be there. Then,when asked to rsvp,it is sure,sure,etc. Get closer to the date and no answers of any kind...not even good excuses. Awful hard to get the community up and dancing when they won't come out the door!!! We are fortunate to have a GG now living here with much experience in the T community around Philly,trying her best to dig T girls out of their little holes.She is having little luck at it. However,I know that girls are always wishing for a place to go and meet others and have fun...So,why do you suppose that NE Florida girls hide so? Chicago was great and Boston as well..Here,no one{very few} want to actually get together out in public. :sad:

Karren H
11-26-2009, 08:34 PM
Has got to be something to do with the weather... Chicago and Boston.. Lots of clowds and cold winter... Florida is hot hot hot!! And since most girls like to go out when its cooler.. That's got to be it?

Rogina B
11-26-2009, 08:41 PM
I just think that the Bible Belt makes it tough enough for many to be out and about.Only hoping that we can get a group going here as there are girls around...hiding!!

sherri52
11-26-2009, 09:03 PM
Try reaching as far south as Flagler Beach. With the college there and Jacksonville toward the north maybe you'll get enough girls to make it a party. Dressed or drab

docrobbysherry
11-27-2009, 12:08 AM
Maybe it's something in the WATER?:drink:

Lauren1973
11-27-2009, 12:20 AM
I have problems making friends as well in Alabama. I have contacted many people and they are good then a week or two later gone! oh well it is hard in the south to go out and not get crap. I did go out today enfem to the store and it was a good experience I guess we just have to do it by ourselves.

Kate Simmons
11-27-2009, 08:01 AM
A lot of folks in Florida are older and more conservative. The GG you speak about sounds like Katie Wannabe. I hope she is doing well down there.:)

patti.jean
11-27-2009, 08:44 AM
We have the same no show problem in west Michigan. I think Chicago and Boston do better only because there are more in the community. When we have events with a draw from Chicago and Detroit the turn out is better. However when it is only West Michigan the results are different.

SuzanneBender
11-27-2009, 09:25 AM
I have problems making friends as well in Alabama. I have contacted many people and they are good then a week or two later gone! oh well it is hard in the south to go out and not get crap. I did go out today enfem to the store and it was a good experience I guess we just have to do it by ourselves.

Going out by yourself is never as fun as being with a sis or two. It's hard to find GFs but once you do they will be your BFFs. We have a bond that is hard to find elsewhere.

sterling12
11-27-2009, 04:56 PM
I'm not sure about NE Florida, but here on The West Coast of Florida we have a pretty vibrant and committed community. Christy's Tropical Escape will be coming up next weekend, and I know there will be over a hundred representing a broad spectrum of The Transgendered Community.

For what it's worth, Christy made her connections by involving people she met, who would pass The Word along to members of their particular sub-community. She also set up a Yahoo Group and that enhances communication.

My Particular Support Group keeps expanding, and finding new ways to explore commonality's with other people in our Community. Just yesterday evening, spent a delightful four hours meeting folks from a new All-Inclusive Start-up Group down in Sarasota. Brian, who is a Transman was very candid with us, is currently leading The Start up Effort. We shared a lot of talk and candor, and quickly realized how much we share in common with our Transman Brothers. It seems that we actually are very similar in attitudes, experiences, and lifestyles. I think we probably share much more in common with these folks, than anyone else.


By the way, those folks got talked into attending Tropical Escape too, and I will be setting something up with Brian involving a presentation at a Tri-Beta Meeting.

So, I think to get things going, you all will have to show a lot of commitment and fortitude. You have to physically go out and find people, interface with them, make friends, and motivate them to attend. It's not as hard as it seems. You have to be gregarious, and you will learn that. In time you start to see very positive results.

Peace and Love, Joanie

sherri
11-27-2009, 06:23 PM
It's the same here, all talk and no walk. The main reason is fear of being outed. Even when we can assure them of privacy and discretion, they just can't seem to find the courage. Consequently, I don't have much patience with their whining about being in the closet.

I also have a theory about another reason having to do with people's deplorable manners when it comes to online acquaintances etc. Anonymity appears to relieve many people of any obligation to be considerate. Sterling got it right -- if you can ever meet in the flesh things are different, but of course it's a chicken-or-egg situation if you can't get them out in the first place.

Me, I'm through worrying about it. If they wanna stay in the closet that's their business, as long as I don't have to listen to them. I just accept the fact that I have to make friends -- non-CD friends -- some other way.

akaCathy
11-27-2009, 06:34 PM
Hi Rogina,

I'm in Gainesville, but go to Tampa where Tropical Escape is very active. There is also AltPathways, but their focus is not exactly what I am looking for. Try south and I look forward to meeting you.

Hugs,

Cate

Rogina B
11-27-2009, 09:03 PM
I know it is better in Tampa but I don't have the free time to get there!! I would love to as I see and hear so much. All I am trying to say in my post is that often the T girl has no social manners in not rsvping or making a phone call after they said they would come. And yes Denise,it is Katie that is trying to get it going here. For me,I am happy going mainstream alone,but enjoy the company of another T if they are comfortable in public.I wish there was more T activity here and we hope to get a group back together.

sterling12
11-28-2009, 02:38 AM
"I'm in Gainesville, but go to Tampa where Tropical Escape is very active. There is also AltPathways, but their focus is not exactly what I am looking for. Try south and I look forward to meeting you."

Oh come on Cathy! The Alt is just very different! Actually, I think we have more fun there, than at The Gay Bars. Rule #1 at The Alt...."you don't have to participate." I get your point, but it don't get any kinkier than at a place near you, "The Sawmill!" Now that's bizarre!

For all you who aren't a part of our scene down here, I'm having fun with my Sista'. I guess we are a bit spoiled, we have a great variety of things to pick and choose from. Down here, it's pretty much "live and let live." I guess we are lucky.

On The Subject of Sista's not keeping their word. When we interview for our Group, about one in three actually goes ahead and attends a meeting. I think T-Gurls have hidden for so long, kept secrets, and denied their own feelings; that it's very easy to not keep your word. That's just a minor sin compared to the much larger burden!

Yeah, I wish they could do better; they miss so much! But, I try to be patient and try, try, again. You know what, sometimes perseverance works, and you gain a very loyal convert and friend.

Peace and Love, Joanie

noeleena
11-28-2009, 04:40 AM
Hi...
.It seem s to be the same over here in n z . for the most part
Where i live we dont have any other trans who are out . well not like i am . we have 3 communitys .waimate of 3500 people were i live then oamaru . at 15.000 & timaru . 38.000.
i know of 3 c d.s . now i am well known . yet never see any others .
What i have done is join in with womens groups . & a camara club . plus have quite a bit to do with other groups .
So if like me you find it hard . join up with groups most people dont care what you are . or may be i get accepted were ever i go . I m not saying by every one .
yet i talk to many people . I would ask the groups if you could join in .
...noeleena...

Josephine 1941
11-28-2009, 07:52 AM
Hi Rogina, I am even further south in Venice. I had join Tri-est about 2 yrs ago but found it very hard to travel up to Tampa. When you are older it is harder to stay up all night. I am very interested in Sterling note on something getting started in Sarasota. I am talking to some of the Grul here in Venice and trying to get thinks going here too. I an leaving today for a trip to Mexico will be back on the 5 of Nov. Will drop Sterling a E-mail then. JO

Deidra Cowen
11-29-2009, 10:54 AM
Maybe you just live in area with not enough population to support a Tgirl social scene. We girls that go out are rare as heck, you just might not have enough prospective girls to get it going. Also from what I have seen Tgirls social scenes tend to flourish in big liberal cities where a CD can go out and not create a stir.
I know there are exceptions but that tends to be the rule.

But! All is not lost. Keep looking around for girls in your area. Ask them to meet you out at a club or someplace. After a while maybe you can get 2 or 3 friends or at least one that will regularly do stuff with ya.

Jan Michell Collins
11-29-2009, 11:17 AM
It's just as bad here in South carolina

Christina Horton
11-29-2009, 08:57 PM
I think it's the falic shape of the state, have you girls noticed that. I think that's why......To much the manly state , Now the Rocky's.........

Ediosa
11-29-2009, 10:44 PM
:sad::sad:Rogina, I'm one of those that you have invited and not responded. Sorry, I have not had the opportunity to go out but am willing when I can. I have a son and finding a babysitter is hard, especially one that you can trust. Plus, the days in which you have wanted to get together, I was busy with other activities that were planned. Trust me, I want to get together. I think it will be fun. Again, sorry for not responding.

Elizabeth.

Jodi M
11-30-2009, 12:42 AM
I think a lot of CDs are in the same situation I am. I like to associate and atend Cd functions but I also have a social life as a man as well as family activities and functions and it's hard to commit to doing things with other CDs.
I do belong to a Transgender organization and I sometimes feel bad that I can't do more with them. Most often I am out by myself when oportunity presents itself.