Are You a Competitive Crossdreser?

[msginaadoll]

Do you check out the other CDs at the club, support group, etc to see how you compare to them. Do you look at pictures and say Oh my God I could never look like that I'm throwing in my mascara. Or maybe in some cases what were they even thinking when they put on that wig/dress etc. After all most of us are men here and at times we do have a competitive appetite. I almost stopped going out in my early years cause I felt like I was a hideous freak. It also seemed I was meeting some girls that felt that they were better than me, and I was letting them feel that. I admit I'm still working on my self image at times I still feel out of place, ugly, etc. Recently I cut a trip out to the club short because I felt that I was unattractive and dumpy. I had dressed to go shopping earlier and not wearing clubwear. In many ways we try to emulate women and I wonder if we dont also bring some female insecurity about our looks along with a male need to be the alpha dog. Anybody else ready to fess up?

[Kate Simmons]

You look fine to me Hon. Comparing myself to another CD is the least of my concerns. Too much fun to be had my friend to get hung up with that stuff.:)

[Sally24]

That's pretty common with women as well as men. I try not to let it affect me much but yes I take note of the others around me when I go out. I don't have to be the best looking in the group but it's nice to be one of then!:heehee:

I like to pick up tips from everyone so I do that with other CDs as well. Certain clothing types can make you look better as well as the ways you use your makeup. I try to learn more every time I dress. Not too old to learn a few more tricks.:devil:

[Eve_WA]

Dont forget the olde adage...

'Women dont dress for men, they dress for each other.'

In a lot of cases this is true. (and before I get slammed... many other cases it doesnt). I see competition among women and what they wear to be far greater than what I myself feel. Now that is just my perception, granted. But having spent a great deal of time with good looking, competitive women, I do find the stereotype to have at least some limited merit. I cant tell the times Ive heard a gal friend calling another to ask what she was wearing. And not only to coordinate, but also I surmised to up the ante, get an upper hand. Did they ever ask their man what they should wear? Hardly ever.

Now granted, I do care how I look. I also, as one said, dont need to be the best looking in the room, but Id like to be ONE of them! I do look at what others wear (whether they be CD/TG/GG). I analyze how I think they pulled it together. If I think it 'works'. And maybe what I would do differently. Its kind of like a game or exercise. I do have to laugh, at the one club I tend to patronize, most of the ladies wear jeans, and most of 'us' wear dresses and skirts.

[Sarah Doepner]

I have no expectation to be among the best looking girls in the room. I hope to think I'm not at the other end, but that may be my fantasy world kicking in. My hope is to finish in the middle of the pack where no one pays much attention. I look to see what ladies my age are wearing and how they behave and strive for that. I am pleased when I'm around another CD who is dressed to the 9's and looking good because she will draw the attention.

Is that competition or just a compromised strategy? Maybe the middle of the pack is the best I could do so I will be as competitive as the next girl, just not necessarily with the same goal.

[flic]

I think some competitive aspects can be healthy in all aspects of life,,,as long as it doesn't become all consuming and crippling to self esteem. I've definitely looked at others and thought 'oh my god, i could never look that great',,,,but then i look at ways i can work with what i have, I suppose in that way I only really strive to be as happy as I can be rather than trying to beat anybody else. Sure i've suffered terrible lows with self esteem,,,but i'm sure most of us have,,,so now i try not to have a yardstick and to do the best I can!!! sooooo cheesy, but soooo true!
x flic x

[Karren H]

I don't go to clubs... I don't really look at other CD's photos other than to see what they are wearing.. But I'm competitive as hell.... I don't compete aginst other crossdressers.. Or aginst other women.. I compete aginst myself.. To see if I can do better than the last 100 yard dash in heels? 0 to madeup in 3.2 minutes... Now you want competition!! Shopping should be an olympic sport!! In my humble opinion! :)

[Alice B]

I am an extremely competitive person in most events, especially sports. But, not so with respect to dressing. Sure I check others out, mostly on this site. But, when I see someone that is especially beautiful I find that I want to learn from them. Not be competitive by any means. I try not to compair myself to others because we are all unique in our style and I know that I am not going to pass in a general public setting. This has been a great learning experience for me to first accept that I like to dress and then to accept the look I achieve and be proud of it.

[AllieSF]

I don't know if it is really competition, but I occasionally compare myself to other CD's. I must admit that it makes me feel good if I think that I am up to par with them. At other times I take no notice.

[Rianna Humble]

I think some competitive aspects can be healthy in all aspects of life,,,as long as it doesn't become all consuming and crippling to self esteem. I've definitely looked at others and thought 'oh my god, i could never look that great',,,,but then i look at ways i can work with what i have, I suppose in that way I only really strive to be as happy as I can be rather than trying to beat anybody else. Sure i've suffered terrible lows with self esteem,,,but i'm sure most of us have,,,so now i try not to have a yardstick and to do the best I can!!! sooooo cheesy, but soooo true!
x flic x

What she said in spades!

[MarciManseau]

I think we should push to make it an Olympic sport :devil:

Just think of all the media attention we'd get, and maybe some extremely lucrative endorsements. I'd love to be on the cover of Cosmo!

Who else wants to help me start a campaign by writing to the International Olympic ruling group? :daydreaming:

[docrobbysherry]

After being at the SCC event for 4 days, I can't recall hearing one catty or critical remark from any of the girls there!

And, I guess I was oblivious to any feelings of competition or jealousy! Just walking around among all those Tgirls was SUCH an AMAZING experience! I think I WAS learning from them, tho.:)
When I saw a particularly good looking girl, I tried to see what she had done! Same as I do with GGs!:brolleyes:

Like Karen, my competition is ALWAYS with, and against myself! To try and appear more fem!:heehee: