Can you give up crossdressing?

[emmicd]

I have tried many times when I purged and have come to the conclusion I can not give up crossdressing.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

I thought many times I did and really tried hard to do so but what I realized is that I have been miserable when I gave away all my feminine clothes and wasted so much money in the process. Now I realize how important it is for me to dress and I have come to accept it after many years and many purges.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Ofcourse it has affected me. I live with it every day. There is no time when it is not on my mind. I am able to conduct my life but crossdressing is a very big part of my life.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

If I knew I would be able to answer it but I don't know why. I just feel I was born with feminine needs and crossdressing help me with my gender identity.

Is it still a big secret?

For most it is but for close family it is hard to keep it a secret as my need to crossdress has intensified.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes I am a crossdresser starting at age 4-5 and am in my late 40s and still doing it with the same excitement I felt as a child.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I would like to but am very shy about it.


emmi

[Mistybtm]

:DNo never as i get older it seems the more i do crossdress as of now when ever i am home i am always dressed.:D

[pantyhosecd]

No never

[Shelly Preston]

Can you give up crossdressing?
Its posssible for some I have no doubt but I don't think I could

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
No

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
Yes it has affected me. I live with it all the time its part of who I am.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
Again I think it is part of who were are

Is it still a big secret?
Yes for the most part it is

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Yes, I have had many years to think about this question

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
I do as much as I can and I know we all need support at one time or other

[Jenniferpl]

Girl, You hit the nail on head with your statements. I have given trying to stop. Oh I wish it would go away but it refuses, so I am learming to embrace it. The more I accept it, the happier I seem to be. I think it is more about the journey.


As far as reaching out to others. That is why I am a member of this site. It is comforting to know that other people have experienced smimilar challenges and thoughts.

[linnea]

I have abstained from crossdressing for various periods of time, and I don't crossdress at work (though I wear panties underneath every day). There have been a few times in my life when I didn't crossdress for a couple of years, but to give it up forever seems unlikely to me.

[Karren H]

If I knew I could chuck it all.... I would have by now.. Hell my wife told me I couldn't quit after she found out I crossdressed 4 years ago... Life would be so much simpler to be stuck in one gender or the other... Either one... I'm not pickie! Lol.

[jenna_woods]

never, in fact the older I ger the stronger the need to dress becomes,

[Samantha Girl]

Can you give up crossdressing? NO! :D


Do I want to give up crossdressing? NO! Why?! :heehee:


Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? Of course, it's opened me up to the many possibilities of life, it's liberating! :devil:


Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? because we love it, because it's a huge part of who we are, it's part of our identity, because it makes us feel great/sexy, because... :p


Is it still a big secret? Just to my family, all my good friends know, all my girl's friends too :)


Will you always be a crossdresser? Feels like I will be :cheer:


Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? YES! I think I have on here when I've felt like I could help ;)

[Rachelhouston]

Can you give up crossdressing? I could but I don't want to

Do I want to give up crossdressing? No

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? Yes, I think about the way the clothes feel. I know it has made me more sensitive to women and their issues.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? Everybody dresses for different reasons, so I'm sure there's a different answer for everybody. For me, it's just because I like it, but I'll go months and months without.

Is it still a big secret? Not to the wife, but Rachel doesn't really leave the house much (and even then only if she knows she won't be seen)

Will you always be a crossdresser? Yes

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? I'm happy to give advice when asked or share experiences, but there are limits. I'm lucky to have a supportive wife, but one CD is more than enough for her. She doesn't have any interest in dressing anybody else.

[MissKara]

I could not get rid of Karla even if I wanted to. She is too much a part of my life.

After trying to surpress her for three long, painful years with a girlfriend who was repulsed by the thought of men dressing in womens clothing, I found that she had grown stronger to the point that there is no way I could seperate her and me :love:

Lots of Love,
Miss Karla

[sarahcross]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
Sometimes I do. Its drilled in my head so hard that its not normal. But I do like it. I just dont like the secrecy

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
Absolutely. I feel better about myself a bit and it makes me feel like I am where I should be.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
Absolutely. When Im trying not to dress it makes the urge bigger.

Is it still a big secret?
Only two people know and one is a crossdresser. So i'd say yes

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Yes I will

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
Ive helped a friend who is one.

[Kate Simmons]

Evedently not, according to the general opinion here.

[PatriciaT]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Absoluterly not. This is by far the general view I have seen in various groups and I agree !00%

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Sometimes I do. It would make life simpler but then very dull. I have a kind of negative approach. I hate wearing boys clothes, I think thery're ugly, and uncomfortable.
when I am en femme I feel much more natural and comfortable, and don't look like a nerd. In one sense I would liker to give it up but the alternative is too horrible to consider.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Certainly. It's on my mind a lot. I am happier and more relaxed en femme. This is me. Once I came to accept it as natural and normal my whole life changed and I became I far happier person. I discovered the real "me".

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

We are born with this desire. This is hard to express, but most women are born with the desire to look a certain, "feminine" way. We are born with the same desire. Most women would shudder at the thought of having to spend their lives in men's clothing, expecially the really masculine type. So would we.

Is it still a big secret?

Unfortunately, yes.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes. I haved had this desire ever since I can remember, and as I noted above, the alternative would destroy me.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I have some difficulty, but a lot of symparhy for the transgendered. I would
love to reach out and help other crossdressers.


I guess I could sum up all of my comments by saying, "I'm in it for the duration."

[Sherry-Stephanie]

Probably not...but I haven't reached that point where I have to consider that option....

[Rachel Morley]

There's no way I can give up .... and why would I? Why would I want to give something up that makes me happy and ( I think) enhances my life and makes me a better person :)

[Rachel05]

I used to find it difficult to live with when younger, all that confusion and uncertainty about who I was and where it was all going, now I love cross dressing and don't want to give it up, it makes me happy to cross dress and so no thoughts of doing anything other than getting more confident, I really want to go out dressed now, just haven't got there yet, but I will

[Jilmac]

Emmi, I can relate to almost everything in your thread, in fact, I couldn't have said it any better. I don't want to give it up, I enjoy it too much to give it up. I have asked others if they would ever give up the pleasures they enjoyed; i.e. golf, bowling, gardening, outdoor sports, hunting/fishing, and they all replyed with a resounding, NO! So I see no reason to ever give up the thing that gives me a great deal of pleasure. I know for certain that the day I give it up will be when dirt is being shoveled over me.

[Nigella]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Yep, the moment I realised that I was a Transexual :)

[Alice Torn]

In normal circumstances, and dressing once a week, sometimes have gone a few months abstaining. In dire times, where just survival, is the issue of the day, homelessness, etc, I can quit, yes! When it comes to whether i eat, and have a dry place to sleep, or crossdressing, the cding is in last place! Of course, i still think about doing it. The human is quite adaptable, when circumstances didtate. But, in not so desperate circumstances, I am dressing only once a week or so, can;t seem to abstain for more than a few months.

[Deborah Jane]

Only if I stop breathing!!

[Rebecca Jayne]

Why give up a part of me that i enjoy, just as well do a lobotomy on me.

"All of me why not take all of me, can't you see I'm no good without you."

[VanessaVW]

When I have tried to quit, it becomes almost an obsession and that's just about all I can think of. When I wear something (hose or a slip) each day for a little while, I'm comfortable about it and can clearly think about other things.

I've just accepted it. It's not harming anyone, is it? Should I feel guilty?

Vanessa

[Amy Hepker]

Nope, it is in me and always will be no matter what. I have been through many girlfriends and 2 wives and I still crossdress. The thing is, I have known ever since I was a little kid that I was in the wrong body. I would look in the mirror and say to myself, that is not me, I did not recognize me in the mirror, I am a girl not a boy, but my body is male, EWWWWWW!

[theresa]

Can you give up crossdressing?
Never had to consider this question since I have no desire to stop.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
Nope, its part of whom I am

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes I probably am obsessed with dressing since the desire to act and feel female is always on my mind. It's a fault I'm aware of and usually maintain balance in my life.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
Maybe because we were born with "special" genes that make crossdressing and similar behavior a natural act for us. I'm no expert, but I wonder if this might be the case.

Is it still a big secret?
It's a secret with most people, but my wife knows and is very supportive. Im very fortunate in that regard.

Will you always be a crossdresser?
No question yes. It's part of how I define myself.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
Sure I would give advice and viewpoints if I felt I had some experience in the area. However I think there are very many types of situations and problems that TG folk face and there are no one size fits all answers. Various perspectives from others can help here as well.

[KateW]

The question is... can I give up being me? The answer is categorically no! I can certainly stop dressing, but I feel that its the desire to dress that makes you a crossdresser.

[Bridget Fitzgerald]

Yes you can. I haven't in ten years after the wife went cold on it. It's no fun, but you can. You can't stop "being" one, but you can stop doing it. You have and make a choice.

[Danielle76]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

A part of me definitely does, because then I wouldn't have to worry about keeping it a secret from the wife. For a while, it was all I ever thought about, which was another reason I wanted to give it up because it was such a distraction for me. Lately, though, I've chilled out a lot and only indulge once every few weeks. While I'm doing it, I'm thinking that I love it so much and I thank God I can do this, but then when I'm done, I usually wish I didn't have the desire to do it at all... So, to sum up my answer, I don't know!

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

It's definitely affected me. It was an obsession for quite a while, so it's definitely had more negative effects on me than positive.


Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

It's difficult for me because it turns me on so much. For me it's purely sexual, not a gender identity issue. I film myself and take photos while I'm dressed up...these days I look at pics of myself dressed up more than actually dressing up. It turns me on quite a bit, and I guess that's the main reason it's so damn hard to stop completely.

Is it still a big secret?

MOST definitely. I've only ever told one person, and I wish I could take it back. Wife still doesn't know, and I pray she never does.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

...Not sure. If something ever happened that my wife and I got divorced and I was single and living alone...then yeah. I would probably be a CD for the rest of my life. If things don't go like that, then I could see it dying out in a few years...then again, I've already been doing this for about 20 years, so if it hasn't died by now....

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Probably not. Not in person, anyway...

[Kara Connor]

One thing I have noticed people say on this forum, and which is true for me, is that the more accepting of yourself you become, the happier you are in "guy mode" as well as "girl mode".

I suppose I could give it up - at least the dressing part, not the mental part - if I really had to. However, since coming to an acceptance, and embracing of my feminine side, I feel more relaxed, happier and less aggressive. My internal conflict has gone away. I am also more interested in looking good in drab, and have found the motivation to lose quite a bit of weight so I think I look better as a guy too. Plus I get a better choice of women's clothes :)

My wife has known since before we got married, but it is only recently that we have both moved into the "I am what I am" phase (cue for a song?). Other than her, only four close friends know, and all but one of them are people I have told in the last three months. I would say that I have had a positive, or at worst neutral ("Is that it?"), response from all of them.

I actually enjoy going shopping for clothes with my wife now. used to feel resentful when she got to choose stuff I would have loved to get, so I had the typical "bloke looking bored whilst wife shops" attitude. Now that I know we will sometimes look for stuff for us both, I enjoy picking out things I thing she will like too - my taste does not always match hers but I am getting better. This weekend the woman on the makeup counter commented on how nice it was that I was being helpful whilst choosing a lipstick to match my wife's colouring. We both just smiled, but it was fun. It is also fun "critiquing" other people's outfits.

I also enjoy painting my toenails, and though it sounds rather silly, I find I can derive a certain calming effect during stressful situations at work by invoking what my wife and I call "tranny powers", focusing on my (completely hidden) toes :) I definitely think I am somewhat "female brained" which also helps me with interpersonal skills, and I hope makes me more understanding of other people.

I think we are really lucky, since we get to experience some of life from both the male and female perspective. Most people are stuck with one or the other, so we get double the value out of life!

- Kara

[girlalex]

I don't think its possible to stop cding. and if you do stop then sooner or later it would be on your mind again and before you know it you will probably find yourself on this website again asking the same question.

[sissystephanie]

Contrary to what many have said on this thread, you CAN STOP Crossdressing if you REALLY WANT TO! I put the Caps in on purpose, because the problem most CD's who try to stop is lack of attitude, or willpower! You can change almost any type of behavior, if you have the right attitude and the willpower to do it. To those who say you were born being a CD, I say "Hogwash!" Unless of course, you were born as a TRUE TRANSGENDERED person. On the other hand, if you are what I refer to as a True CD (one who dresses only for fun or pleasure) you can quit any time you want to, if you are really detirmined to do so! You LEARNED, somewhere along the line, to be a CD! You were not born with it! Now I will answer the questions in my own way.

Do I want to give up crossdressing? For the right reason I would! Example; if my GGF asked me to, I would do so in a heartbeat, and she knows it!

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? It has definitely made me more aware of my feminine side, which I don't think is all that bad!

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? It isn't, if you have the willpower to do it! Unless you are a true T-girl, then it certainly will be harder!

Is it still a big secret? From some people, yes, but not from my family!

Will you always be a crossdresser? Maybe, maybe not! I like to crossdress bacause it is fun, but it is not my whole life!

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? Here on the forum I have reached out to help other CD's and Transgendered many times. In addition I have met, in person, several other CD's here in Georgia and am currently waiting to have the opportunity to meet with another CD. I have a dress for him/her that is too large for me, but should be just her size. BTW, I am giving it to her!

[Kara Connor]

[snip]
To those who say you were born being a CD, I say "Hogwash!" Unless of course, you were born as a TRUE TRANSGENDERED person. On the other hand, if you are what I refer to as a True CD (one who dresses only for fun or pleasure) you can quit any time you want to, if you are really detirmined to do so! You LEARNED, somewhere along the line, to be a CD! You were not born with it! [snip]


Eeek! Sorry but I have to disagree here. What is a "true transgendered person"? I would identify as transgendered in the sense of not feeling myself completely male, and having a strong feminine aspect to my personality which I need to express in order to be true to myself. I think that many of us believe we were "born with it".

[DressyJenny]

I've thought about givening it up. Recently I actually tried. I actually haven't dressed since ( I actually don't dress much). But I started going to this site, so I guess I haven't really given it up.

Plus I like to fantasize about being femmed. My crossdressing is very much connected to my sex drive. I don't know if I would ever truely give it up.

I do have a strong mascline side though. So I don't feel the need to always be dressed or anything like that. I'm thinking of dressing up a little tommarrow.

Nothing major. I was thinking about wearing some Sandals. Some slides with a black footbed and two purple uppers. They feel pretty comfy when I wear them. If I do it, I'm going to make sure my face is shaved. I might put on some dress paints and some sort of top. Not sure how femine on the top. I'll probably come my hair to the left to make it more fem. I just want to look nice tommarrow.

[SuzanneBender]

Can I give up crossdressing. Sure I can think of some great methods:

1. Lock myself in a castle tower with no girl clothes.

2. Join an aboriginal tribe where they wear no clothes.

3. Become a nudist without the aboriginal affiliation.

4. Join a Buddhist monastery in the Himalayas. They get to wear cool robes, but I don't think that counts as crossdressing.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
Nope none of the above solutions are appealing to me at this moment.

Has it affected me?
Sure. At first I hated it now I love it so much that I am not sure where my female side ends. If I have to move to Nepal to quit dressing it will have a huge impact on my life.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
Because I don't want to move to Nepal, live in a castle tower, or become a nudist. Actually, it completes me now. I am as feminine as I am masculine. It would be like chopping my arms off if I gave that up.

Would I ever give up crossdressing?

Only if I transition. It seems silly to crossdress FtM after all of the trouble of going through MtF transistion.

Would I reach out to help other crossdressers and transgender people.
Of course. We are sisters and brothers in a struggle for acceptance with society, our loved ones, and most importantly ourselves. We all need a shoulder to lean on and I love being that shoulder. Lord knows I often need a shoulder to lean on.

[Bridget Fitzgerald]

Let's make sure we understand that the word, crossdressing, as used in the question indicates an act rather than a state of being. Anyone can stop the act. I chose my wife over my dressed self, mind you there is no judgment on others implied in that. That said, I think about it continuously now, and have the last ten years.

[karinels]

In regards to could I, would I, should I, Might I, what would make me, why do I, ect..... I say I need to dress, period, and that is me. I cannot speculate for anyone else, but to me, crossdressing is a part of my life that will never ever go away. I can only hope that it can progress into a more comfortable and accepted role for me.

As for the last part of the original post, I am a vol firefighter and it has crossed my mind often about dressing for my dept to get a feel for how they would react to helping someone like me in an emergency situation, and then thought about our local EMS company, and even thought about offering the service to local authorities in case of crisis that might just need a person who might be able to express deep pain to calm a situation. It might seem naive to some, or most, or all, but that would help me as well as possibly helping those who I work with voluntarily when the need arises.

[gail price]

No no no

[Mary Morgan]

Can you give up crossdressing? Yes, I think I can, but I cannot give up the need and it would be to my detriment as well as those around me.

Do I want to give up crossdressing? Yes, I would like to wear women's clothing all the time and free up some closet space.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? My crossdressing is a manifestation of who I am.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? Because it is as much a part of me as my left-handedness, my blue eyes, my sparkling personality.

Is it still a big secret? No, those who need to know do, those who don't are kept in the dark because of the fears of others I love.

Will you always be a crossdresser? Yes

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? Yes

[Frédérique]

Can you give up crossdressing? You can give it up, but it’ll come roaring back every time. Just surrender to the urges…:surrender

Do I want to give up crossdressing? I don’t want to. I married the compulsion some time ago, and I mate for life…:twirl:

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? It’s definitely helped my personality, my artwork, my writing, and…I’m happier! :)

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? Because it’s so pleasurable, but that’s my opinion – your results may vary…:battingeyelashes:

Is it still a big secret? Yes, secrecy is titillating. I like to keep things close to my bosom…:heehee:

Will you always be a crossdresser? Yes, because this is the role I was born to play…:daydreaming:

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? Absolutely – I am merely Freddy, and I am at your service. How may I help you?

[TabbyJames]

Can you give up crossdressing? I probably could if I really wanted to but I don't want to. I love dressing up and letting my female persona out. If I had to give it up, I couldn't delve through the clearance racks in the womens department any more.

Do I want to give up crossdressing? absolutly not, I find an inner peace when I "change".

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me? I allows me to escape, to become a different person, to let out a part of me that otherwise is locked in.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop? Because its part of who we are, you cant change your inner soul.

Is it still a big secret? Yes, but not to my wife. I did tell my best friend this last weekend and that went very well.

Will you always be a crossdresser? Yes, I always have been and always will be.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered? Yes

[Carly D.]

My answer to that question "can you give up cross dressing" is YES!! when I'm dead I'm sure try as I might it just isn't gonna happen anymore.. All kidding aside the truth is I have quit any number of times and I'd be willing to bet just about everyone on this forum has quit with the idea that "this time I mean it, I am done!!" and then that magical day comes along that hits you and you (I) just gotta get some of that on.. see that girl over there?? see that dress?? those shoes are killer cute... I need something like that!! NOW!! quit dressing?? yea right..

[sherri52]

THe answer is no but I wouldn't want to either. I love being dressed and every night that is how I am.

[Princess Chantal]

Can you give up crossdressing?
Yes

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

No, not yet.... Having too much fun with the experiences

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes, made me more emotional and sociable

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

For me, it is a combination of things. The main reason is that I have become very active in the local tg community and the kink community

Is it still a big secret?

To my family, but if they ask about it I'm willing to tell. Hmmm maybe some would see me on local tv while I tell my "story" for a documentary on the local crossdressing community

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I don't think so

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Yes, I put on the Big Sister shoes several years ago in both the cd/tg community and the kink community....

[ChrissieM]

I have tried to stop crossdressing but have never been able to go more than a few weeks before I want to get dressed up.

I have been crossdressing for about 10 years and it has caused me stress for sure, but I do love wearing frilly things and pretty dresses.

[jenna_woods]

no never, the older I get the more I need it, tried once a few years ago, got rid of everything, then a few mo's latter was buying new things to wear, from then on I know I would always enjoy my female side.

[Mardi]

I once gave up crossdressing, it was the most terrifying weekend of my life.

[NathalieX66]

I decided that I will have this component (CD'ing in my life, that is). I work in a creative business and I cannot tolerate constraints. Maybe a better word is regulation would be more fitting....such as in coping with alcohol....but not constraints, and certainly not elimination.
Freedom = power...well maybe some discipline is necessary to an extent, but not total suppression of the desire to crossdress.
Why punish your own mind? :wall:....did it do something bad to you?

[Stephanie81]

Can you give up crossdressing?
At this stage, I seriously doubt it..

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Not a chance.. I love it and reckon i look better as a girl..

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

It's certainly affected me in a few ways.. I have better posture, I look after my skin a lot more, I feel much better about myself.. so all good really..

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

Don't know.. I think if you cross-dress, it's probably part of your genetic make up.. ???

Is it still a big secret?

Ha, no way.. I've been "out" as a crossdresser since i was 18.. Most people know me as Steph pretty much full-time now :D

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes , definitely.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I would, will, and in fact do.. My friend Jo is just starting down the difficult path towards the permanent change and I intend to help her every step of the way..

[Stephanie81]

To those who say you were born being a CD, I say "Hogwash!" Unless of course, you were born as a TRUE TRANSGENDERED person. On the other hand, if you are what I refer to as a True CD (one who dresses only for fun or pleasure) you can quit any time you want to, if you are really detirmined to do so! You LEARNED, somewhere along the line, to be a CD! You were not born with it!

Whoa.. I think this is the first time i can truly say on this forum that I couldn't disagree with you more..

I have a lot of TRANSGENDERED friends, and I consider myself TRANSGENDERED also.

There are many points on the spectrum of Transgenderism, ranging from simple cross-dressing, right through to hormone therapy and the permenant change.. Dressing as a woman is part of who I am and i firmly believe that i couldn't be any other way.. Nor would I want to be. Nor do I feel the need to actually become "fully" female. However, I don't consider myself "fully" male either, as my day to day persona is, by its very nature, inherantly female.. Therefore, I AM transgendered. :jumping:

[sissystephanie]

Eeek! Sorry but I have to disagree here. What is a "true transgendered person"? I would identify as transgendered in the sense of not feeling myself completely male, and having a strong feminine aspect to my personality which I need to express in order to be true to myself. I think that many of us believe we were "born with it".

Kara,

You may be right in saying that many CD's believe that they were "born with it!" But where is the proof? I have done a lot of studying about being a CD, and have never found any proof of someone being "born with it!" At what early age did you decide that you were a girl in the wrong body? Or was it that you were attracted to soft feminine garments as a young lad?

A True Transgendered male is one who wants to look, and act, as feminine as possible without actually becoming a woman, except maybe for sexual reasons. A Transexual male wants to become a woman, even to the point of have SRS. A CD, or as I class it, a True CD dresses simply for the pleasure of wearing feminine clothing! Not for sex (except with the wife or SO on occasion), or any other reason.

As another poster put it so well, crossdressing is an ACT! Not a part of our being! Any ACT can be stopped, if the willpower is there to stop it. You could stop, Kara, if you really wanted to! I know you don't want to, and that is your right. Bridget stopped 10 years ago, because his wife was more important to him, as she should have been. I deeply respect Bridget for that!

I stopped completely many years ago to strengthen my family, at least I thought it would. After 5 years of no Stephanie, my WIFE begged me to bring Stephanie back!! She missed our girly times together! But the point is, YOU CAN STOP CROSSDRESSING IF YOU WANT TO!!!

Stephanie the English Rose,

We may disagree, but at least we both chose a great name!

Actually. I don't think we do disagree! You are a Transgendered person by definition. On the other hand, I am a heterosexual male who likes to wear feminine clothing from time to time. A Crossdresser!! I have no desire to be a woman, I just like to dress like one! Now that my late wife is gone, i don't even wear a wig or makeup. Nor do I wear forms, having been blessed with natural 40 B's! And no, it is not gyenomastica! Just natural growth, according to several doctors.

[MissyW]

As many have done, I started at an early age, too. Purged a couple of times. But with and accepting wife and a few friends I came out to, I am comfortable with the cd life. I probably won't ever quit and I really don't want to.

[Michelle_Anne]

Can I give up crossdressing?

Yes. I have done it dozens of times.

[shorty82]

Can I give up crossdressing?

Yes. I have done it dozens of times.

Then you have not truly given it up. You may have put it on hold a while but you keep coming back to it apparently.

IMO crossdressing is a part of how a person is wired, just like sexual orientation (again, IMO). One doesn't choose to like the clothes of the other gender, they just do. This is just like sexual orientation, one doesn't choose what gender they are attracted to, they're wired to like a particular gender (or both in the case of bisexuals). I didn't choose to like women's clothing or be attracted to women, I just do happen to like wearing women's clothing and to be attracted to women. On the same note, my homosexual male friends didn't choose to like men, they just do. My homosexual female friend didn't choose to like women, she just does.

Once society understands this then maybe crossdressing and homosexuality will become more accepted. But I honestly doubt society will ever accept these things fully, especially crossdressing.

[Nicole Anne]

Honestly? No i couldnt i have come to the point in life where as i know this is me and am very content and happy. If i was 20 yrs younger i would more than likely be living fulltime as a female.

[Ashlee]

Won't give up something I love doing, even if it's behind closed doors most of the time.

[maggiecdva]

Never ... Why would I want to give up something so important to me!

hugs - maggie

[chriscosmos]

recently about crossdressing. Like, why do I do it? But I've always liked women's clothes and makeup always noticed fashion, always envied women for their creative expression in creating a "look". As an artist that impressed me. Anyway, I tried giving it up and did sometimes for years because I knew it upset my wife (now that I'm separated it's different) and because it seemed like such a chore to hide it and prepare myself when I had so many other interests.

But why does it come back? Why can I not give it up? Because it lies at the center of my identity as a feminine male. I like being male but I'm very feminine though good at pretending to be very masculine. I don't want to pretend so why give it up? Why give it up until I really want to give it up? There's something very mysterious and profound about the whole gender-bender adventure we are on. Let's see where it leads.

[Spacey]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Absolutely no!


Do I want to give up crossdressing?

I've suppressed it many times. but not anymore. I'm getting too old to fight it.


Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Constantly and more each day. Been having some real ups and downs lately.


Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

I gave a little freedom to the girl in me and she has completely taken control. She is fierce!


Is it still a big secret?

Unfortunately yes. It's my biggest hurdle at present.


Will you always be a crossdresser?

Always. Mind, body and soul.


Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Right now I'm in need mostly but I would love to help others. I care too much of everyone.

[Jodi M]

Don't know if I could give up dressing. I think it is apart of who I am and I become miserable and stressed if I go for long periods without doing it. Just going out dressed for an evening can put me in a happier more relaxed mood for days.

[BWOemerger]

I am convinced that I can give it up but the incentive to do it (give it up) has to be better than the incentive not to give it up and I don't see that happening.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

No and that is the key, It I really wanted to I could, but I really like the way I feel and for the most part look.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Crossdressing has made me the person that I am. I have been dressing and wanting to be girlish since I can first remember at 4 or 5, maybe younger

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

Because of the way it makes me feel. I like the feeling of the clothes as well as how I feel dressed. It is an escape for me. It helps releave the stress of being a man. I feel that most of the time I am a very Inadequate man.

Is it still a big secret?

Yes only my wife and few family members know

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes, I just like it.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Yes that is what this site is all about isn't it :-).


BWOemerger

[LaurenKLee]

i think if it was wrong i could, but its not so i wont :)

[Amanda Styles]

Personally, I have never been able to give up crossdressing even when I was married (twice).
Now it is part of who I am, so why would I want to give that up.
As for the difficulty in quitting crossdressing perhaps it is because it is
hard wired into our brains
It is pretty much a secret at this time, I have a couple female friends that know but that is the extent.
Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
Without a doubt.
Will I always be a crossdresser?
More than likely.
Just joining this forum was a huge step for me, helping someone else who is a crossdresser or TG?
I certainly hope I can

[k lynn]

NO have tried always come back Love to crossdress.:daydreaming:

[Nicola2876]

I've tried but it's who I am and it's never going away. Plus I love it!

[RachelZ]

I never gave up cross dressing... I just take breaks from it once in a while which is my case now. I've taken several breaks before the longest lasting 6 months. I've gone about 4 months now. I miss it but I know its not the end. Its going to feel amazing when I do start up again.:daydreaming:

[marlene4]

I once thought that you could, but then I read, "once a cross dresser, always a cross dresser", and the realization hit me like a tonne of bricks...

[MelodyS.]

I tried several times to quit and it just doesn't go away. I have come to terms with it. There are days I hate it (like when I see a size 3 beautiful dress and I know I will never fit into it) but it's how I am. I have a close freind that is very supportive of me dressing and have become a bit more confident in it. I may be still in the closet to all but a small handfull of people, but that's where the clothes are :)

[christinek]

Can I give up cross dressing?
Sure, we all die someday.

Oh wait, I want to be cremated in a dress and heels!

So NOPE!

I want to meet the maker and look them in the eye dressed like that and say really? This is the vision you had for me, so here it is :D

[txrobinm]

If it were a matter of absolute survival, sure I could give it up. But there would be consequences- I would drink too much, eat too much, become a generally bitchy person all around. I wouldn't want to, though.

I make a CHOICE to dress. We all do. I feel that I am a better person when I have the opportunity to present myself as Robin a couple of times a month. When I deny myself that time, for whatever reason, I become depressed and angry. Still, it is a choice.

[Emma England]

I have heard that the crossdressing desire lasts for about 900 years.

[markinhose]

ahhh no.


without even thinking about the idea, no i cant. ive been dressing since the age of 12 and its now become over the years a very big part of my life. i am the female i cant see in the mirror every morning.

[ShirleyO]

I tried to purge once and luckily I just stored averything away, that lasted a month, surprised I made it that long. I am a widower and lost my wife of 37 years to cancer. So as time goes on I have attempted to meet a new lady but the rejections have been nearly 100% so I thought if I purged then I wuldn't have to explain my self. Ya know what I am always happiest when dressed even with all the tragedy of the last few years. So I would never quit again and Yes, the older I get the more I want to be dressed all the time.
Shirley

[Elsa von Spielburg]

Can you give up crossdressing?

I've barely just begun, so... I guess? I dunno, after my initial stint with it, stuck in my brain pretty deeply and I fantasized about it until I did it again.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Not at all. I have a loving, supporting GF and brother who know and it will be just a matter of time til my family knows, so I am on my way to fully embracing it.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Certainly. It's going to become a part of my life, if only a small part for now, but it's putting my confidence through quite the trial.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

Dunno. People like what they like.

Is it still a big secret?

Not really, the most important people in my life know.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I have no idea.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Perhaps, once I am more learned in the subject.

[pernille d]

its funny to think that none of us know the answer to why we crossdress but at the end of the day we can not stop it if we tried , and the mail thing in most posts is that we dont want to stop it .
it makes us what we are,so it does affect us, i have tried a few times to quit but no more as now i know it will be with me till i die,but thats also because i like it so much .

i have kept it a secret unti now but i want to come out now , so i know how hard it is keeping things bottled up so i of cause would help other crossdresseds if i could .

[Daniela76]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Now that I have accepted it as part of me & not shameful, I could if I needed to for a really good reason.


Do I want to give up crossdressing?

No, not really at all. I don't think I'd want to even for a GG.


Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Oh yes. I think I'm already a better & happier person for accepting it as a true part of me.


Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

If I knew that I could probably stop. I'd say it is because it is fun, and secret & part of me.


Is it still a big secret?

Pretty big. Only my mom & psychiatrist know so far. And of course all my sisters on here!!


Will you always be a crossdresser?

Most likely unless I end up having SRS. Which would only be after getting married & having children & being a father for a few years. Then I'd be a woman.


Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

As soon as I get myself sorted out, yes I will. I want to reach out to other Christians (and anyone else) who feel that what they are doing is wrong. Not to convince them that they have to do it, but that they determine where the shame is actually coming from. There is a Christian suicide/depression hotline that is housed very near where I live & I would love to help out there. And make the pharmacy I work at be CD/TG friendly. (I know we already have a couple there & many homosexual male & lesbians.)

[bridget jones]

I don't believe I can give up crossdressing,believe me I have tried several times.I don't understand why I have the urge but I do and always have since the first panties I put on.I often questioned GOD "why me?".I am not comfortable being "out there yet".I do however enjoy chatting with my friends on this site and I'm happy to do so.I have so many things to ask and understand.I have struggled with CD'ng all my life and still have so many questions that need to be answered.The thing that amazes me is how comfortable and relaxed I am in heels and hose while most I know GG's hate the idea of having to dress like that.I do know I am most relaxed and comfortable when completely dressed which makes me ask"why was I not born a GG?"

[Julieanne]

Can you give up crossdressing?
No. No more than I can give up being tall.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
In many ways life would be easier, but since I’ve always been a crossdresser I have no idea of life without being one. But no, it’s too much a part of who I am. I would still be a crossdresser even if I never dressed again.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
It goes both ways. Crossdressing affects who I am and who I am affects my crossdressing. It relaxes me.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
It’s difficult since I’m only out to my family, but as a teacher (“schoolmarm”) I talk with a lot of students, and I am sensitive to sex and gender identity issues. Either crossdressing gives me greater insight, or the greater insight feeds into my crossdressing, or, more likely, both.

Julieanne

[mmandy31]

I tried so many times to give up crossdressing i gave up.
I would say this is it and get rid of everything but that lasted about a week because i would see something that i like and go buy it and start all over again so now if i have the urge to quit i put everything away for awhile until i am ready to dress again .

[LauraKCD]

There is no doubt that I am with the majority here

[Angie G]

I have had long breaks when I was younger. But no I could not and would not want to stop cross dressing. After coming out to my wife 4 years ago I need not even think of stopping she's great about it.:hugs:
Angie

[vivianann]

I have tried to give up crossdressing, a few times, the longest stretch was 11 yrs, but it took its tole on me, I went into a deep depression, and it destroyed everything I had worked so hard to attain. it was Jan 2006 when I was in my deepest despair and alot of soul searching that I finally crossdressed for the first time in 11 yrs, it was the the first time in a long time that I felt like I have come home to my true self, it was like the chains of depression was finally broken, I have come along way from that moment on, I have since come out to family and friends, I am enfemme almost everyday, sometimes because of work I may not be able to cd for a week or more at a time, and yes it does cause me to start getting depressed, so I need to dress to keep my sanity. So the answer is no I cannot give up crossdressing, it is a way of life for me, and it brings much happiness and fulfilment to my life. There is only one drawback to crossdressing, it makes it much harder to find a wife.

[Cheryl T]

Can I give it up?...I think so

Do I want to and will I ever try to ... NEVER, EVER!! :thumbsdn:

I am Cheryl and Cheryl is me. There is no separating my feminine self from my being. As others have said, the older I get the more I need to express this ingrained part of my being. I would never give it up any more than I would try to cut off my arm or leg.

It's taken years to become who I am and I love me! :hugs:

At last I have no guilt, no remorse, no shame and I will not turn my back on that struggle to find who I really am and was meant to be.

[Tiff Rivera]

I've tried many times to quit. Did I succeed? No

In the last year, I've had a lot of reflection time and I began reading journals I've written over the years. And I found a direct correlation on my unhappiness with myself that always seemed to coincide with the times I quit.

I realized, these thoughts were not just thoughts, these were feelings of who I am. If this is who you are inside, IMHO, to quit would be to deny your inner self, the true you. So why fight it?

[MissAmy]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

I want to be normal so I woudln't have to live in the closet. But I can't change it so no

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

It has in many ways, but has never changed me really as a person

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

Because women's clothes feel so good

Is it still a big secret?

Oh yeah, but I plan to come out in June.


Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I wish I knew some locally I could meet.

[Raychel]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Not really, This is a part of my life that I actually enjoy, Why would I want to give up one of the very few things that I enjoy

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
Sure it has affected my life. If it weren't for those time when I get to dress and just relax, then I probably would have gone completely crazy by now.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
Because it is a big part of my life and one that does not give me too much stress

Is it still a big secret?
Too big of a secret. My wife knows. But that is about it.

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Pretty sure that I will be till the day I die.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
Probably not, Still pretty deep in the closet.

[Loni]

give it up.....why?

it is me.

would love to help if I can,
but for now Loni is trying the next big jump for her.
she has pocked her head out a bit, now it is time for a walk down main st.

as another said " the older I get, the more it is" or something like that.

when the spring dresses come out and the days have warmed up a bit, Loni is going shopping dressed....no more need to shop in drab.

.

[Jason+]

Can I give up crossdressing?

Can I make the conscious decision to never put on another article of feminine clothing ever again? Yes. Could I ever reach a point where I didn't wish I still did or want to? Could I ever walk through a store and see things I would have liked and not want for them? No, not any easier than I could remove note by note every piece of music I've ever played or heard. If I made that decision to not wear another thing could I be strong enough not to eventually let bitterness and unhappiness bring as much negativity as the clothes may have? I am not sure I could.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Sometimes when it has been the big red bull's eye that was easier to attack than the actual issue.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

It has to. It's made me take a hard look at who and what I am and what I'm willing or not willing to be.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

While I don't know for sure if it's something I was born with or not I do believe there is some basic component of my personality that allows me to be softer and more gentle and nurturing. I feel it is that same softness that allows for the wearing of a dress rather than running screaming in the opposite direction.

Is it still a big secret?

The people whose opinion really matter know. My parents, my wife and the kids that live with me. Some of my co-workers know or at least suspect but it's not out in the open at work at all.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Probably up until the point where putting on a skirt and heels isn't crossdressing any more. :D

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

All are welcome to any help or comfort I can offer.

[Molly17]

I stopped when I was younger for a while, but I couldn't fight it for long. It's had such a huge effect on my life, and I don't think I can stop (I hope I won't stop, too)

[LeeBe]

Can you give up crossdressing?
No

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
No, in the earlier years I tried, I'm most here would agree you don't loose the desire.
Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
I'm sure it has, but it is the sum total of who I am.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
I believe I am just wired that way, you just can't give up something that is a key piece of you.
Is it still a big secret?
None of my "regular" friends know.... at least I don't think they know.

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Never dabbled in it until I was on my own, I always would wonder what it would be like to wear dresses. I originally did not understand my secret desire to dress in women's clothes, I guess that's where the seeds sprouted from.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
I feel I am still at a point where I get advice rather than give advice. If someone needed my help, I would gladly give it.

[serinalynn]

No, I don't believe I can quit Crossdressing. It's part of who I am am who I became. I am hooked for life. I love the soft feel of womans clothing.

[VS Fan]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Personally, I don't think so.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Definitely not.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Not in any negative ways, but it has definitely impacted my life for the better... nothing major, but it's lots of fun.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

It's either an addiction or just simply part of who I am... one is called an addiction for a reason.. and the other is something you can't really do much about. And since it's not a harmful addiction (unlike smoking which I quit years ago) I figure what the heck!?! :)

Is it still a big secret?

Well, out to the wife now for a couple months, otherwise still a secret, and will probably remain that way. I have driven en femme before on long trips, but that is about the extent of my "outings/outness."


Will you always be a crossdresser?

I suspect so... Had it not been for this forum I would have thought that when I got older (I'm mid 30s now) that the need would dwindle, but after seeing all the folks here in their "golden years" I look forward to this even more so when I'm able to do it without worrying about the kids :)


Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Absolutely... I might not "out" myself in the process, but I would not fear any public ridicule over helping someone in need regardless of the circumstances.



VS Fan

[Rianna Humble]

Can you give up crossdressing?

Frankly no. I gave up trying after too many years in denial.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

You might just as well ask if I want to give up living.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes, it has released me from tensions due to the denial, but at times has caused me other tensions - especially when I have been in a pink fog

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

Because it is hardwired into my being

Is it still a big secret?

More so than I would like :sad:

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I may give up being a crossdresser a few years after I die. Alternatively, if I get to the stage where I need to transition, I may no longer consider myself a crossdresser once I am fully woman

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I already do

[Samantha B L]

I can't quit. I've tried. I purged several times years ago and it was a big waste of money. I threw away clothes of mine in the seventies and the eighties that nowadays go for big money on Ebay and in Vintage clothing stores. I would have to quit if they made it illegal or threatened to shoot me but I would still think of myself as a crossdresser and I would be good and p_____ o__ about the whole thing and I would look for ways to make myself heard and I would argue the point.

[jasmine57]

I'm like everyone else here. No I can't quit. And more importantly I don't even want to try anymore. For a long time I felt like there was something wrong with me because I liked to crossdress. Now I figured out that the only time something is wrong is when I don't. I don't dress every day as much as I'd like to go 24/7 but I probably dress at least 5 times a week because of the situation I'm in. I feel like something is missing when I'm not dressed but it goes a lot deeper than that. Anyways to make a long story short- NO I can;t give it up.

[Jason+]

I can't quit. I've tried. I purged several times years ago and it was a big waste of money. I threw away clothes of mine in the seventies and the eighties that nowadays go for big money on Ebay and in Vintage clothing stores. I would have to quit if they made it illegal or threatened to shoot me but I would still think of myself as a crossdresser and I would be good and p_____ o__ about the whole thing and I would look for ways to make myself heard and I would argue the point.

Samantha if they made it illegal I would have to hide like normal; if they threatened to shoot me I guess I'd have to decide what my funeral outfit would be. Knowing the :D sarcastic me it would be the black lace dress my wife calls "Grandma's Funeral Dress."

[eluuzion]

Could I give up crossdressing?
No, but I could and do "supress or conceal" it enough to avoid any social consequences for myself or others.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
No

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes, from the day I began and will continue to for life.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

It is a paraphilia and has all the normal characteristics. It has a deeply "engrained" origin, compulsive nature and very low success rate in eliminating it from a person's core behavior ritual.

Is it still a big secret?
Yes, aside from the internet world.

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Yes, at a minimum.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered

Isn't that what we are all doing here?

[jacques]

hello,
could I give up - probably not - but why would I want to?
I do wish I could stop shopping though (just for a while)!
luv, J

[Karen564]

Yes, I finally gave it up for good last August...So I no longer CD as a man & never will again...:heehee:

That's what you wanted to know, right??...;)

[sissystephanie]

Why in the world would I want to? I have been doing it for well over 60 years, so why stop now? If the right person asked me to, I would stop immediately! But she has told me that she would never ask me to stop dressing as a female! I love her!!

[NathalieX66]

I have a serious question:
Why would anyone want to defy what one's imagination and human spirit conjures if it is not hurting or affecting someone else? Did your brain do something to you cause you to embarrass yourself?
A clothing designer sits at a table to design something that was intended to make women look attractive to men in order to have his/her company dole out a nice paycheck.
Secondly, if crossdressing is so controversial, why do we continue to base our judgement on what a lot of the public thinks, when that chunk of the population has zero ...."0" understanding exactly what crossdressing is, and why men do it?
Men....ugh!!!

[Brenda Locke]

Can I give up crossdressing ?
ABSOLUTELY NOT. After repressing the desire for 15yr's due too my work and living arrangements. Finially getting my own place allowed me too release Brenda and let her be free.
Having said that, just being Brenda is just so relaxing and in a way rewarding for me it would be impossible for me to give up...
I find that Brenda is slowly taking over, to the point that when I am not working, I am at the very least underdressed all the time, and quiet comfortable being so.
I don't know if going full time is coming in the future or not but at this time I am not concidering it. But hey who knows things happen ,things change, that's life after all.

Brenda :daydreaming::heehee:

[theresa]

Nathalie,

Short answer. No way! I will always have the need to present myself as Theresa.

But you've asked the fundamental question. Why is crossdressing even an issue? On a fundamental level, we're simply talking about exchange of clothing. Probably wasn't an issue hundreds of thousands of years ago when everyone ran around naked. But now society has established "norms" which say that people wear clothing, and that males are identified by certain types of clothing while females are identified by somewhat different (and better!) styles of clothing.

So perhaps what we are talking about here, is not so much what clothing we are wearing, but what gender is being presented. For me, I know that when I dress as Theresa, I'm really trying to present myself as female. If society readily accepted men wearing little black skirts, I doubt I would find much joy in wearing those black skirts and would switch to whatever society had established as social "norms" for women to wear. For me, I think it's not so much what society has forced upon me, but rather, how I have interpreted societal norms for "what is female" and applied those norms toward my desire to present myself as Theresa.

[Jaclyn NM]

No, I can't give it up, and I've tried many times, but keep coming back. I guess it's just a part of me, and I have stopped fighting it. Besides, it's my favorite part of who I am.

[Mardi]

No, never, no way

[TGMarla]

Can you give up crossdressing?
I don't know. I don't think so. I've never really seriously tried to.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Well, no...I really don't want to. What I'd rather give up is the stigmas attached to it, the secrecy involved, and any guilt or shame about it in any way. I'd like to not think about it day in and day out, and not have this constant craving to dress up and be feminine.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Heck yeah, it's affected me. How much time have I spent crossdressing when I might have been doing much more productive things? How many times have I forgone other activities, and made reasons to be home by myself for long periods of time just so I could crossdress? How much money have I spent on this which could have been spent elsewhere and more wisely? It's an omnipresent part of my life that never leaves me alone. How could it NOT affect me?

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

I think it's because it gets imprinted on your being. It becomes a part of your blueprints. It's not like other activities, as it involves gender, and thus presents a way of approaching life that we otherwise miss. It's a part of life as a human being that is denied to us as men, and so it teases and tantalizes us like forbidden fruit.

Is it still a big secret?

Not to my wife. She knows. I don't think she knows how far I take it, though. And my immediate family found out, but I doubt they have any details as to just what it is that I do. Generally, I don't tell other people about it, and as far as I know, other than my immediate relatives, no one is aware of this part of me. And no one is aware of just how deep it goes with me. I've told one friend who found my Flickr page, and that's all.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I think so. If it was going to stop, it probably would have done so by now. And as long as I feel that I'd rather have been a woman to begin with, I doubt the desire to "be" a woman will ever go away. I don't know what it's like to not be a crossdresser. Perhaps it's like addictions in that once you are one, you'll always be one, whether you partake or not.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

I would. And I have done so. But I doubt I'm ever going to be some kind of Transgender Warrior about it. But when others need help, or need to talk, I usually do it. I'm happy to help.

[shycd1]

I have tried and I have failed, so for me no.

[lowlavalentine]

Pretty much hard wired as far as I can tell. Had a cd friend once who claimed she was "cured" of crossdressing through some sort of religious experience. Turned out she returned to worship at the altar of her feminine side after a short while. There have been times in my life where I thought how simple things would be if I didn't dress, but simplicity is overrated.

[Christina Horton]

Why would I want to stop ("I love love love love :D being a Crossdresser")!!!!!

[DaisyG]

Can you give up crossdressing?

I tried numerous times but it never works. The urge always returns.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

No. Probably never.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Certainly it has. Second only to my 39 year marriage, CD has had the most significant impact upon me over nearly all my 70 years.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

It seems to be hardwired. I'm not sure even brain surgery could re-route the circuits.

Is it still a big secret?

Yes. My wife was the only person I'm aware of who knew. Probably because at my (pre internet) age, I grew up with a huge load of guilt, and isolated my soul so much I thought I was the only CD in the world. Only in the last couple of years have I got enough of a handle on myself that I'm considering coming out to my grown grandchildren.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I wouldn't at all be surprised to carry CD to my grave.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Absolutely. I have supported CD and transgendered people on the web for years. I will continue to do so but wish my support not pull me out of the closet when I don't want to go.

Good provocative and thought-searching set of questions!

Daisy

[JoAnne Wheeler]

NO

I DON"T WANT TO

YES IT HAS AFFECTED ME

CANNOT STOP - TRIED TO - CAN'T

NOT AS BIG A SECRET AS IT USED TO BE

ABSOLUTELY

JoAnne Wheeler

[Emma Leigh]

If I could give it up, I probably wouldnt have wrecked the lives of my partner and kids, and maybe wouldnt be typing this from my mothers spare room. Sorry for sounding depressing, but thats how it is.

[Samantha43]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?
I couldn't even if I wanted to. I learned long ago to embrace it and enjoy it.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?
Yes. I believe it has made me more tolerant of people in general. It's allowed me to experience things that a "normal" guy would never experience.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?
I have no idea.

Is it still a big secret?
My immediate family knows. Other than that, it's a secret, and I prefer it that way.

Will you always be a crossdresser?
Yes.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?
It might make me uncomfortable, but I would probably do it.

[ReneeT]

As if I was unsure of the answer, I have proof, yet again. I gave it all up last January, and fell back on the wagon today! It feels nice to be home!

[Charleen]

no.

[Jayne]

I agree with all your points and feel the same.

My honest answer is no I can't stop.

[Rachel05]

Can you give up crossdressing?

I no longer think about it because I no longer want to, I did when younger and more confused, but now it is part of me

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

No

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

It has affected me yes but not in a negative way and now it is as much part of my life as anything else

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

I don't know but it is or it was when younger

Is it still a big secret?

My wife knows because she found me out but she will not talk about it with me, but it has made it easier for me to live with tat is for sure

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Yes for sure, there is no way I want to stop and it harms no one, started at 8 and now 50, so it has been with me a wee while

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Well when I first came to this forum, I found that a little tough to start with but it is getting easier, I think it is hard to share when you have lived this life all alone for so many years

[Magickman]

The more important question is, "Why would I want to?"

[victoriamwilliams1]

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

I tried and it was stronger each time. I do take breaks fro dressing for up to 30 days:)

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes, in a positive way:)

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

It is like an addiction for some and like a thrill ride for some and like both you push the boundries.

Is it still a big secret?

YES! However I am out in the public:)

Will you always be a crossdresser?

I think one day I will stop.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

Yes I do in the online world.

[bimini1]

I think it depends on the person, some can, some can't some will some won't.

I think CDing can give up you before you can give up it.

My Cding has caused more stress than it has relieved. It stresses me out on a daily basis, especially when I hear co-workers make derrogatory remarks about people like me.

[camillegirl]

I have tried and thrown out a fortune in clothes, but I am old enough to see myself as I am, therefore the answer would be no, if it is in you, it is, if it isn`t then you can give it up.

[danielle.cd]

i think at some point we all have tried and with no sucess, the minute i try to go against how i feel i find my self going and buying more things whithin a week, in the last two years i purged twice for my wifes sack saying never again but with in two weeks of each time i had bought half the makeup and clothes again, i was feeling ashamed that i couldnt keep my promise to my wife, who didnt call me out on it until i sat her down and fully explained that i have tried so many times to quite but its like cutting off an arm or some thing its part of me and i cant just stop u married ME and thats a part of me if we accept it now it will save us alot more money, she was fine after that and i respect her now and dont throw it in her face because we both had ACCEPTED it! until u do that your gana go thru alot of money

[FireflyGG]

to be honest, I hope that my SO never does. It's a part of who she is and I love that about her. I fully support Melissa and everything about her and she's a part of my relationship with my SO. If she decided for herself that it was something she wanted to end, we would have to sit down and seriously talk it out. I would want to know why. I can't suddenly decide not to be bi, and I feel that my SO can't suddenly decide not to like stockings and heels and skirts. So we're in this for the long haul. :)

[Emme]

Never: I am lucky that I have accepted Wendi Emme Thomas as me!

The years of thinking I was the only CD on earth were lonely. As we get older and mellow out a little, what others think is not so important. What I think about me is important, AND WHAT YOU MY SISTERS.......... THINK ABOUT YOURSELF.......THAT IS WHAT IS IMPORTANT.

I am comfortable in my own skin(as oily as it is) LOL

I may not be very pretty, and I may be extremely tall, but I can be happy with myself.
I does not matter who knows. We do nothing wrong, there is nothing to give up.

OK I confess: I buy too many coats, dresses and shoes. I might could slow down on that
but that is just the real girl trapped inside my big ole male body.

I LOVE MY GIRLS

[kimmy p]

Me? No.

[Lacelover]

I am the same as the rest of us. The answer is no. I don't have as many opportunities as I used to, but have learned to make the most of them. I also am glad to have found this community and get a lot of emotional support from everyone here.
Lacelover

[Christa001]

Never,Ever. Christa has been part of me most of my life(however not until recently has she been given a name) and is a permanent part of my soul.

[Michelle Lynn A]

Never The Older You Get the worst it becomes!!!!!!!

[crusadergirl]

i believe so can u?

[NatashaCD]

no ive tried many times but cant ive thrown ou alot of $$$ in clothing and im not doing that anymore ive accepted i am who i am

[annsummers]

i couldnt give up i have tryed b4 but every time it gets a few weeks then i can hear something its my clothes calling me im sure lol cant even stay away from the chat rooms or fb for too long lol

[Tiffanycd]

Hello everyone with me every time i have tried it comes back with even more erg's to dress and when it comes down to it i thank it's just personal choice really but with me it's if you can't beat it give in to it :laughing:.
has it been fun yes i have had some fun times with crossdressing could it be funner yes if i knew how to properly dress makeup and all i have gotten so used to only partly dressing i am just happy doing that example pantie's pantyhose and 5 inch heeled boots under my male jeans (i know funny thought LoL) and it could be funner if i could get over my shyness. (work in slow progress)


Tiffanycd

[tashaly]

Can you give up crossdressing?

I can. In my experience, when I start getting serious with a GG, I stop thinking about it. I seem to switch over to full-time guy mode.

Do I want to give up crossdressing?

Insofar as I'd like to be with a GG, yes, but I don't seem to be in a hurry to do this, ha ha.

Do I feel my crossdressing has affected me?

Yes! I'd like to think that getting in touch with my feminine side has made me more sensitive to other people. Also, I think my fashion sense has carried over to my guy side.

Why is crossdressing so difficult to stop?

For me, shopping for skirts and dresses still feels novel to me, so it keeps my interest to find new things that might look good on me.

Is it still a big secret?

You betcha.

Will you always be a crossdresser?

Maybe, maybe not. Like I said, I've stopped when I dated GGs, but maybe subconsciously I'm preventing myself from fully succeeding in this goal? Also, I worry that as I get older, I won't look as good as a woman, so I might not feel as good as a woman, so that might provide an incentive to hang up the heels.

Would you ever reach out to help others who are crossdressers or transgendered?

No more than I try to reach out to help my fellow man or woman, CD or not.

[Tina P Hose]

I could give up dressing, but I would not be a happy Tina.