Unexpected dealing with TSA

[Phyliss]

Following on the post by kay2 , but not trying to bash the TSA or talk about flying in a dress.

Last evening ( Dec 23 ) I took my Cavalry Sgt. Son to the airport. He’d been home on emergency leave for his Mother’s , my wife’s funeral.
As usual I got dressed for the day with all proper under things and had decided to wear my 1” heel tall boots under my trousers (from Fashion Bug).
[He doesn’t know about me and this really wasn’t the time or the place to “come out”]
We had dinner at a local restaurant and left for the airport in plenty of time. He does the check in thing and we head to the departure gate. I kinda get in line with him while we’re making our way to the front. About 7 or 8 people from the front I duck under the cordon ribbon. As he heads for the machine I give him a handshake and big hug ( men can do it at times like that)
Just then a TSA agent walks over to us and asks me if this man is my son. I say yes and she says to me, “ If you go to the airline counter and tell them your son is flying to a war zone they’ll issue you an Escort Pass. Would you like one?”
Of Course I’d like one
Just show a picture ID card.
Son says, “I’ll wait right here on the other side of the machine Dad.”
Hurry to ticket counter and get the pass. ( United was the Airline)
Get back to the security gate.
Now I’ve been through these things before so I know the drill. Everything out of pockets, take off belt, take off shoes, ( OMG! not shoes but tall boots. ) How badly do I want to be with my son for as long as possible? Off come the boots and into the tray.
Side note, Last year I had a heart attack , so now I have two metal stents in place around my heart. I have to be hand wanded when going through the scan machine. I’ve been in a federal building with the same sort of machine. One hand over my heart and extend the other while they pass the wand over me and shift hands for the other side.
Sounds easy enough. I show my medical card to bypass the machine.
The agent calls out “Male assist line 4”
Some BIG, burly, beefy, fella comes over and quite politely asks me to step into the sterile area and then onto the mat with the two foot prints.
“Please turn to face the end of the conveyor belt to keep an eye on your items”
How can I? This guy is 10 feet tall and just about as wide.
“Please extend your arms for a full pat down”
OH Crap!!!! As I start to realize my bra is a slightly padded one.

“How badly do I want to be with my son for as long as possible?”

Besides, if I request a screened private pat down that’ll just add more questions and time.
Take it like a lady, buddy!!!

Standing there like a scarecrow in my stocking feet I sorta mentally time the rhythm of his actions. Didn’t miss a beat as he went about his job. I was half expecting him to either cop a feel or slow down when he felt the bra straps. Nothing and very professional about everything. Even checking the bottom of my feet.
“Thank you for your patience.” was his only comment.

Not sure if I’m ready to “fly in a dress” yet, but I’ve had my experience at “The Gate”

BTW … it was nice to be able to be with my son until he headed down the flyway ramp. Must have been something in the air around there. My eyes kinda watered up just then.

I figure the agent sees about 10,000 people a day, so if they seems to be a bit "testy" at times, it's probably due to the person who was just ahead of you, the one with the attitude of "Do you know who I AM?"

[linnea]

Overall, it sounds as if things worked out pretty well and you got to be with your son--a very nice result, even with the tears.

[Angel.Marie76]

Hey hunny, glad to hear you made it through the checkpoint alright. :hugs: I am sad to hear that your son is, I assume, being deployed right before xmass... :-( You have my very best wishes for a safe and speedy return!

I think you did great through the checkpoint BTW, and it was good to hear that the agent was in good order. There is a definite variance of respect and tolerance with security folks, we can only hope that we get the generally 'nice' ones. 'Why yes, I'm packing what might be considered a concealed weapon. What kind? Hmm.. well, my partner at home calls it a Hobart..'

Happy as possible holidays to you hun.

[Nicole Erin]

I can't even imagine what it is like for parents who have kids serving in the military or going to a hostile area.

[gabe]

I had been selected for the special treatment while underdressed in my business attire a few times. The wand would go off along the metal under wires and the clasps. The male employee would trace the contour of my bra with the back of his hands, not the front so that he might appear to be groping. They might try to pinch my bra strap slightly to ensure it is what I tell them. Most of the time they figure out what it is without asking. The experience is very professional.

I can relate to your apprehension while this is being carried out with your son looking on. Sometimes my colleagues would look on too, but I really do not think they can tell what is going on from a distance, the whole process had been very subtle.

I am flying international while underdressed again this week, maybe I will get lucky and receive the special treatment again.

[Phyliss]

Posting this part through copious tears, I guess I got unlucky and spotted the remark that was removed.

My heart is hurt. Thank you to whoever edited the thread.

Yeah it kinda hurts to have him leave at this time, but it hurts even worse knowing why he was here in the first place. NO Soldier should have to take emergency leave to attend the funeral of a parent.

[Persephone]

our thoughts and our hugs are with you, Phyliss, at this time and always.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Presh GG]

Phyliss,

Through all the trials in life, know we are here to support you.

With great respect and thanks for the sacrifice of your son in the military.
He will be home soon.

Can you tell us a little more about him? Age ect ? We'd love to hear.

Best wishes,
Presh GG

[SuzanneBender]

Phyliss you have me crying like a baby. God bless you, your son and your dear wife. You all are in my prayers.

I came home from Iraq in 2003 when my father passed. Emergency leave is tough, but trust me his thoughts are not on his difficulties or the holidays. They are on you. Those few minutes that you were able to carve out in the gate area while your son was waiting on his plane are precious and will be a moment that you both will remember for ever. I am glad some tall boots and a bra didn't get in the way of that moment.

It isn't much, but I wish I was there to give you a big hug. Next time you talk to your son tell him Thanks from all of us for his service and sacrifice.

[Vicki-Z]

Phyliss I'm so sorry for the loss of your wife and to have your son sent overseas at the same time. My heart goes out to you.


Vicki :hugs:

[sissystephanie]

Phylliss, as a member who lost his wife a little over four years ago I do know how you feel! Anytime you want to chat, I am here for you.

Fortunately, I don't have any family members in the military service at this time. It is bad enough that you lost your wife, but to have to send your son back to the war zone is certainly enough for watery eyes!!My Best to you and yours!!

[Alien7up]

Phyliss, Sorry to hear the loss of your wife. My father passed away a year ago and i know it hurts, my heart goes out to you hun :hugs:

I hope health wise you get better, I couldnt imagine what your son is going thru, losing a Mother and serving in the military.

Yours
Christine

[Laura Evans]

What a close call for you with your son so close by, you had me in tears, glad it ended well. My condolence to you and your son for the lost of your wife and his mother and on the departure of your son to a war zone. With the holidays upon us this cannot be easy for you, my heart goes out to you.:hugs: Take care, Phylliss

[susann_gardener]

Thinking of you at this time.

[Jason+]

Phyliss,

From a fellow service member I offer both condolences and the wish that your son returns home as safely as he left.

Jason

[Leslie Langford]

Phyllis,

My heart goes out to you during the difficult time that you are facing right now, and I know that mere words cannot express the hurt and sadness that you must be feeling over the loss of your dear spouse. And given the time of year, this loss becomes especially poignant.

I can relate very well to what you are going through at the moment, so I feel your pain. This year marks the 20th anniversary of my dear mother's passing, and she actually died on Christmas Day. Christmas has never been the same for my family and myself since that time :sad:.

[jenniferishappy]

you know phyllis, i never thought about it but they must encounter bras on men on an almost daily basis in a full shift.
lets look towards 2010 as being a big and good year for you. i always enjoy your posts. merry xmas girly.
love jennifer

[Karen564]

Phyliss,
Please accept my belated condolences, I didn't know your wife had recently passed...I'm so very sorry to hear that:sad:...and I'll say a prayer for your son so he stays safe, as well as one for you & your late wife..:Pray:

:hugs:

[Phyliss]

Overall, it sounds as if things worked out pretty well and you got to be with your son--a very nice result, even with the tears.
I guess I had a quick lesson in bravery.


Hey hunny, glad to hear you made it through..
I think you did great through the checkpoint BTW, and it was good to hear that the agent was in good order...
Happy as possible holidays to you hun.

I'm rather pleased the agent was professional also.


I can't even imagine what it is like for parents who have kids serving in the military or going to a hostile area.

Dear, I pray you never have to learn


I had been selected for the special treatment while underdressed in my business attire a few times. The wand would go off along the metal under wires and the clasps... The experience is very professional.
I can relate to your apprehension while this is being carried out with your son looking on. Sometimes my colleagues would look on too,...
I am flying international while underdressed again this week, maybe I will get lucky and receive the special treatment again.

If he did kinda get an idea of what was happening he didn't ask any questions.


our thoughts and our hugs are with you, Phyliss, at this time and always.
Hugs,
Persephone.

Thasnk you


Phyliss,
Through all the trials in life, know we are here to support you.
With great respect and thanks for the sacrifice of your son in the military.
He will be home soon.
Can you tell us a little more about him? Age ect ? We'd love to hear.
Best wishes,
Presh GG

Sorry, he's married with 3 of his own sons. 32 yr old Presently stationed at Ft Lewis Wa.

Phyliss you have me crying like a baby. God bless you, your son and your dear wife. You all are in my prayers.
I came home from Iraq in 2003 when my father passed. Emergency leave is tough, but trust me his thoughts are not on his difficulties or the holidays. They are on you. Those few minutes that you were able to carve out in the gate area while your son was waiting on his plane are precious and will be a moment that you both will remember for ever. I am glad some tall boots and a bra didn't get in the way of that moment.
It isn't much, but I wish I was there to give you a big hug. Next time you talk to your son tell him Thanks from all of us for his service and sacrifice.

Believe me, that bit of time will ALWAYS be special to me. You'd think we would be talking up a storm during those few moments. Just quietly sitting next to each other as Father and Son. No words were needed.


Phyliss I'm so sorry for the loss of your wife and to have your son sent overseas at the same time. My heart goes out to you.
Vicki :hugs:
Thank you


Phylliss, as a member who lost his wife a little over four years ago I do know how you feel! Anytime you want to chat, I am here for you ...

Not to worry dear, I have your address in my book.


Phyliss, Sorry to hear the loss of your wife. My father passed away a year ago and i know it hurts, my heart goes out to you hun :hugs:
I hope health wise you get better, I couldnt imagine what your son is going thru, losing a Mother and serving in the military.
Yours
Christine

As I've said, I pray you never have to learn


What a close call for you with your son so close by, you had me in tears, glad it ended well. ... With the holidays upon us this cannot be easy for you, my heart goes out to you.:hugs: Take care, Phylliss

My military training kicked in ... do what has to be done, when it has to be done ... no matter what.


Thinking of you at this time.

Thank you


Phyliss,

From a fellow service member I offer both condolences and the wish that your son returns home as safely as he left.

Jason

I salute you for your service, To those who understand no explaination is needed, to those who don't .... no explaination is possible.


Phyllis,

My heart goes out to you during the difficult time that you are facing right now, and I know that mere words cannot express the hurt and sadness that you must be feeling over the loss of your dear spouse. And given the time of year, this loss becomes especially poignant.

I can relate very well to what you are going through at the moment, so I feel your pain. This year marks the 20th anniversary of my dear mother's passing, and she actually died on Christmas Day. Christmas has never been the same for my family and myself since that time :sad:.

20 yrs of Christmas with that memory!!!! OMG ... and here I thought I was special, you have my respect and deepest sympathy.


you know phyllis, i never thought about it but they must encounter bras on men on an almost daily basis in a full shift.
lets look towards 2010 as being a big and good year for you. i always enjoy your posts. merry xmas girly.
love jennifer

That's what I was thinking as his hands slid over the cups. "Just another guy wearing a bra, ... oh hum"


Phyliss,
Please accept my belated condolences, I didn't know your wife had recently passed...I'm so very sorry to hear that:sad:...and I'll say a prayer for your son so he stays safe, as well as one for you & your late wife..:Pray:

:hugs:

And a hug back to you.



Thank you to every one who commented.

I guess the point of my post was the unexpected encounter and the ooooppppsss feeling it produced in me. BUT having learned from the others on this site, I was able to carry it off. In anothe time and level of CD, I'd have probably made a quick stop in the mens room and gotten rid of the bra.

These days I'm much too cheap to pitch a $45 bra because of what somebody might say or think.

[Caroline C]

I'm sorry for your loss and I hope your son does well. I'm sure TSA agents have seen it all. Being professionals who's job is on the line their not going to point and make a scene. And if anyone ever questions you a simple excuse would be something like a bra for support helps with the discomfort from the stents. My grandfather had Gynecomastia and as much as he hated to wear support he did admit it was more comfortable.

[flatlander_48]

Turn! Turn! Turn!
The Byrds

Words - adapted from The Book of Ecclesiastes
Music - Pete Seeger

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven

A time to build up,a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven

A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing

To Everything (Turn, Turn, Turn)
There is a season (Turn, Turn, Turn)
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late