So if you're interested in guys, where do you meet them?

[shesgotleggs]

The previous thread about dating guys was getting pretty long and was addressing several different topics of sexuality and dating, so I thought I'd start another thread to focus on one specific question........

You gurls that said you had dated guys and liked the whole "being treated like a lady" experience, is exactly what I'm looking for. So tell me how/where you met a man that didn't mind dating a CD!

Hugs, Tracy

[bridget jones]

I am so happy this thread has started.I'd love to get dressed,go out and maybe meet a guy.I'm just curious,that's all.

[sherryleigh]

I wouldn't mind the answer to that question either! :)

[Kate Simmons]

Obviously you look for places where open minded people go.:)

[sherri52]

Many of the girls here have gone to gay bars and have been hit on so I would say that's a good place to start.

[eluuzion]

It depends on the size of the city, but there are usually some clubs that gay oriented. Some in larger cities become specific in advertising their "TG" orientation.

Although I am always clear that my desire is focused specifically upon "passable TG" on any forum, dating site, etc. I always receive lots of replies from "guys", giving it a shot anyway, hehe. Many seem sane and genuine. There are several sites (free, sort of), that cater to dating CD,TS,TG etc.

Of course, you never know if a guy is really "Chester the Molester" in real life, so you have to use common sense and stay safe.

[joyce483]

the easiest place to meet a man would be at any truckstop, i go there all the time!

[kellycan27]

you'ed probably stand a better chance if you went to a gay bar...in drab.


I am so happy this thread has started.I'd love to get dressed,go out and maybe meet a guy.I'm just curious,that's all.

If you go to a gay bar..... people are gonna think, and you know how tired you are of that..:lol2: Just messin with ya.

[SuzanneBender]

The rules are the same for everyone if you are dating. You will not meet other if you are hiding in your rooms.

2 weeks ago I was in San Diego and went out to eat en femme by myself at a local restaurant. I was happy reading my book and enjoying the view, but I was asked to join a group of people. To make a long story short they asked me to join because they were trying to set a guy from their group up with me. My point is I would have never been in that postion had I not been willing to go out on my own.

If you are looking for Mr. Right you never know where you are going to meet him.

[Tracii G]

I actually met a guy at the grocery while I was dressed.We dated for a year or so.
He was all gay I was mostly bi so it didn't work out in the long run.
I have met guys that seem intersted in CD's at book stores quite a bit.I was looking at travel books one day and a guy asked me where I was thinking about going.I said I would love to go to Spain one day and he said he had been there and said it was very nice.
Then he asked you really look like a woman and present very well but you are male aren't you?I said yes and thank you for being descreet.
He said would you like to go out sometime?
I said sure and we have been out several times.A nice guy but still hung on his ex wife.

[Carol123]

would love to know

[Nicole Erin]

Craigslist is a reputable website for finding quality relationships.

[kellycan27]

Craigslist is a reputable website for finding quality relationships.

I have heard that craigslist is a meet market for hook ups and one night stands. Just what I have heard though and have never had the occassion to use it.. Just be careful.

[StayceeCD]

Craigslist is a reputable website for finding quality relationships.

I wouldn't call Craigslist a "reputable" place! It can be dangerous!! I would say if you're interested in meeting guys who are into us "special" girls, go to a place that has a reputation for having TG nights on a regular basis.. Thats where the "admirers" will be.. Usually that will be a gay club.. Gay men are not usually into girls like us.. Gay men are looking for other men.. Plain and simple.. I've been complimented many times by gay men but they are just simply not into us if we're presenting as women.. Now on the other hand, alot of TGirl admirers are pretty damn creepy! But there are some who are perfect gentlemen that will treat you like a lady! As always, use your common sense and be careful!!

[Elsa Larson]

I've been a widower for 4 years and I have 3 teens at home.

In guy mode, I look for ladies on several free dating sites:
PlentyOfFish.com
OKCupid.com
DateHookUp.com
Each works a bit differently bit I notice tgirls on each of them.
Search functions allow you to find specific words in profiles or forums SO look for words like "transgender", "transsexual", "crossdresser" or "transvestite" to narrow your search. Be sure to check for all combinations: women seeking men, women seeking women, men seeking women, men seeking men since these sites only have binary gender options.

I'm officially looking for an "old fashioned girl", i.e. one born female BUT I do think that a reasonably tall guy (6' 1", 1.86 m) can be the perfect fashion accessory for any tall lady. Once my teens fly the nest, I will open my search to nice ladies regardless of birth gender.

As a guy, I tell about my own crossdressing before a first date.

[StarrOfDelite]

I moved to New York to get away from having to go to GLBLT bars to meet people.

Most smaller cities just don't have sophisticated night spots. You have three basic choices in Pittsburgh or Cleveland, for example, neighborhood bars where everyone knows everyone and nobody would be seen dead with a TV even if they are interested, clubs full of thirty-something teenagers and music playing at 110 decibels, and a few GLBT bars.

In the city there are plenty of the kinds of bars you would find in Pittsburgh or Cleveland, but if you have a couple of friends to hang with, and it doesn't matter if they are gender girls, trans-girls, gay men or straight men, it's easy to go to regular bars and meet people and be absolutely truthful about one's sexuality. Being New York, the chances of meeting someone who is interested, and might even have some experience with us, is relatively higher than most places, and being New York one usually doesn't get stared at like a five-legged horse even after coming clean.

There are bars in the city which are T-oriented, but they are Meat Markets for the most part, same as any other place. In fact, I would guess that at the famous TG-bars most of the girls are pro's (and some of them are gorgeous) and most of the patrons are tourists.

I wouldn't go out alone, someone posted a thread on that, dressed as a woman, and no gender women I know go out to bars alone either. It's just not what women do unless they are absolutely looking for a pickup.

[MaryAnn40c]

I was with a good GG friend,going to clubs. She was friends with guys who were into crossdressers/bisexuals ect. It was months before I would trust going out with any of them. As time went on and you get to know these people then a relationship can start from there.

[dilane]

I've been picked up on in TG clubs (the worst, imo), at the mall, in bookstores, in straight bars, in mixed (straight or gay or Lesbian) bars.

They've been working class guys, retired businessmen, a director, a policeman, and a lawyer -- how's that for a cross-section?

Guys who would go out with a T-girl are all over the place, but they're probably a small percent of the population.

If you're out and about, and are reasonably presentable, and maybe if you're in a bigger city, it's probably inevitable.

[windycissy]

I'm not into the bar scene, most of the guys I've met have been from Craigslist, a catchy personal with a picture in the T4M Miscellaneous Romance will get a lot of responses...you have to be super careful to weed out the sickos, and if you do land a live one, choose a meeting place where you'll be safe. Honestly, there's so much risk of possible physical harm, let alone STDs, that I haven't done Craigslist in a while.

[Barbara Dugan]

I've never been on the army but I get very lucky with the military personnel:daydreaming:

[vikki2020]

Craigslist is a reputable website for finding quality relationships.

I do believe this was delivered with just a hint of sarcasm,in her usual delightful manner, eh, Nicole?
Meeting guys will happen, if you're out there.I've had some fun lately on Hot or Not, way more than I would have believed! Guys from all walks of life have contacted me, and they understand what's behind door #2! There are some who didn't read the profile, but are still chatting after I broke the news to them.If you want to play the game, you have to get in!

[Karen__Starr]

I usually meet men online from various forums. I approach dating as first get to know them by writing, then phone followed by meeting say at Starbucks and if things go well perhaps to a bar or dinner. I have found several bars and places to eat that are trans-gender friendly. I would avoid Craig's List, I have tried using this and found most men are only interested in one night stands, several were married and I am not into that. Also there are some real crazy people on Craig's List so my suggestion is to not is CL.

[Deidra Cowen]

Well this is one area I know a bit about! :doh: :devil:

Anyway forget the net. Adultfriend Finder, yahoo chat, Craigslist, etc. I honestly in all the time I chased men only met one or two from the net. 90% of the guys are fakes or just having a fantasy. They will not followup. Of course factor in serial killers, rapists and the scum of society that will be there on the net too.

The GLBT bars, very spotty, these places seem to draw the standard creepy admirer types. Not much personality and usually have a wierd vibe. But I have met a handful of guys. Its much safer to meet a guy at the club too with your girlfriends there around you if the guy gets creepy.

The best place I have found where I have met really handsome nice guys? Theme parties at straight bars! Skin Too, Twinkledome or any fetish/bondage gathering. You get a mix of people who are open minded. Anyway at those events I can remember three really nice guys I met. One of which actually ended up dating me and taking me on real dates. If you are a wild child like me at the theme parties you will meet M/F couples too, let me tell ya its a hoot to hangout with a couple.

[jo_ann]

craigslist are full of horny men looking for one night stands for sure. I'm more interested in dating other crossdressers, which has almost happened. Biggest problem with other crossdressers is they are usually married, and it's hard to find time.

[KimberlyJo]

Craigslist is a reputable website for finding quality relationships.

ahahahahahaaaaaaaa....heeeeeeeeh.....hahahahahaaaa *gasp* haha ha ha


Hello, we're MURDERERS! .... Twix pls

[Monica93304]

I've been out a lot lately, but it's been to the Gay bars. No luck there. The few admirerers have been creepy. I've attended bars like The Oxwood in LA. I've had no luck finding men there. I've been hit on by CD's there, but not my thing either.

I hope to be able next year to live in my own place and be able to go normal things as a girl. Grocery shopping, going out for coffee, and things like that. Hopefully I'll meet men that are more in the main stream.

[jill_gossard]

two places that have worked for me in England.
sweetwednesday.co.uk its a sex club for tvs and admirers.
its advantage is that is begins after lunch so you could still be home on time.
You will get attention there.
on line I have had most success with swingingheaven.co.uk
the adverts and profiles let you chosse quite well.
I have had plenty success there.

all dirty though no serious relation ships expected.

[Lilly 40C]

I had my best success when I was involved with two couples. Sometimes we met as a couple with me both dressed and not, and other times I met dressed with just him. It was always great. Anyway, in one couple the man died and the other couple moved away. So, I'm presently without a man but looking. Does anyone in New Jersey know a good place to met men?

Kisses,

Lilly:daydreaming:

[Bowmanls2]

It is also hard to find other CDs to date and have fun with!

[Veronica75]

I did all of my crossdressed dating back before the whole craigslist era, so I can't speak to that-- there were chatrooms, but I never really got into that. In NYC there was never a shortage of parties-- so much so that some had become very specific to transsexuals, others to crossdressers.

I only went to the CD parties, and as Starof Delite said, most were meat markets and you wouldn't want to go alone unless you were looking to get picked up. Since I WAS looking to get picked up, I never had a problem going alone. :D A lot of the guys were creepy, but not all of them, and it was usually very easy to tell very quickly. I found too that you could always count on a sister to get you out of trouble if a guy was giving off bad vibes-- even total strangers would respond if you flagged them down going by and help extract you without too many clues-- or at least that was my experience.

I always had fun at (and often after...) the CD parties, I really miss them!

[christinek]

I would say go to your local TG/CD support group! You will meet people accepting right off the bat.

I have been invited to some odd places to include knitting classes at Barns & Nobles, theaters for some interesting play topics.

You never know where you might meet Mr. or Ms. Wright

Christine

[MimiLee]

I've dated a few guys that I met through aol and craigslist and have had pretty good success. This route is definetly not for everyone; I was extremely cautious and spent alot time weeding out the good guys out from the bad. Before I would actually meet a guy, I would probably chat, IM, email with them for a few weeks to two months. If your patient as well as the guy, it can work out. Just remember to be careful.

[PaulaSF]

Tough to find either guys, or other out & about t-gals (my preference ;-) on CL.

Seems that the fellas are generally "newbies"/curiousity seekers that haven't sorted thru all the confusion, guilt, paranoia & shame re. bi/gay sexuality/dating and have a lot of fantasy vs. reality disconnects, seemingly fueled by a lonely "dating" life associated with on-line ******* porn (shake my head at how we must be fulltime/passable, yet they're only seeking a closeted, "down-low" hookup).

Of course, this cuts both ways, many t-gals come off as "boy crazy," ditzy 12 -year old girls, and perhaps not really "ready" for serious dating, either (I know, we all gotta start sometime!).

Misc. Romance (MR) vs. Casual Encounters (CE; home of the "closeted, sex-only, quickie hookup!") is a slight help.

Downside of CL, is anyone can flag you, & get your ad removed, so for those of us that are at all selective, tough to avoid the disgruntled would be suitors, that are upset we declined their cretin-esque overtures!

Having dressed fully, gone out dressed, and dated as a tranny for a quarter century, now, I find that there isn't really any "magic," to it- getting out there, doing things you enjoy, while presenting in a time of day, and venue appropriate manner is a biggie. This, by itself, will avoid lots of on-line "time-wasting" with those, of any gender/presentation , that aren't really ready to enjoy the whole see & be seen vibe that fun urbane evenings out entail.

I think its natural for both guys & t-gals to sorta "roam in packs," which can be offputting to potential suitors. A single wingwoman (or man, as appropriate) is best- fun to have someone to share the evening with, and not too daunting to get approached/chatted up. But, the downside of getting ever more confident & adventuresome is the realization that you're likely going to be doing it solo, which has the added benefit of making one seem more approachable & "available."

Far less gay/t-dar, beyond the "tranny ghetto" of drag shows & gay bars, too. Museums/galleries, and live theater (inevitable chatting when at the interval, queueing for the loo/cocktails, etc.!) have been a great source of fun evenings, in my experience.

Agree that large cities are likely best- a certain upside to being fairly "anonymous," afterall!

cheers,
Paula

PS "Rules Girl" disclaimer: I'm not big on the whole conquest/one-night stand mindset, and disdain being treated as an unpaid escort/once every month, or two, "booty call," with no communication or follow up/thru! Caveat Emptor!

[Julie in Virginia]

I've had most of my luck at TG bars. Divas in San Francisco has been a particulary good place for me to find an interested guy or two:). I've also had a good time at the TG weekend at Rainbow mountain in PA.

Of course, most of the guys were only looking for one thing. But if you make them work for it-it can be a fun adventure!