How much notice to give employer?

[Faith_G]

Three questions for those of you who have transitioned on the job:
How far ahead did you tell management?
How far ahead were your co-workers told?
If you got a do-over, would you give less time or more?

Thanks! :happy:

[Zenith]

Management HR...3 months.

Close friends and immediate co-workers very shortly after HR (via one-on-ones).

Other co-workers about a month (via letter).

Seemed to work very well for me, but YMMV...

BTW nobody was surprised...;)

[Jenn2716]

Even though my first day at work as Jenn won't be til Monday:

My direct Manager - 6 months
My direct co-workers - 5 months
HR - 4 months
Other Mangers in my building - 1 month
Everyone else - 1 week

So far I've had nothing but positive feedback. Hopefully that will continue as I start actually coming to work as myself.

good luck!

[pamela_a]

Faith, my situation may be different than most. When I started the job in 1999 I dressed male and had a full beard and mustache. Over the course of the past 5 years I started changing my attire and appearance. I shaved my beard and mustache, replaced my male clothing with womens' and changed my hair style to a more feminine one.
When I started HRT last July I started talking to my HR dept. My company's stance was since it didn't affect my ability to do my job it wasn't an issue to them. I met with HR a couple of times going over my announcement (which I handled). When I transitioned 1 month later in August, I notified my IT department to change my name to all the systems and I sent out my announcement letter.

It turned out to be a big non-event. Most of the people I work with were not at all surprised. A few asked what took me so long.

Best of luck however you do it.

[Frances]

Supervisor and HR - 18 months
Co-workers - 6 months

It was perfect. Everyone had ample time to get used to it, and to ask me questions. During the six months until full-time, I used the special needs bathroom on the ground floor of the building, which was a pain because it was 12 floors down and I had to ask for a key everytime. Once I went full-time, I started using the women's bathroom with everybody else, and never experienced a problem. The company wrote a letter of support 6 months before full-time, and another one the week before telling everyone to use my female name, and that I would be using the women's bathroom.

[Kimberly Marie Kelly]

My Hr Rep knew 10-11 month's prior. (2 people)
Senior management about 2 month's prior (8-9 people)
One very close co-worker 5 month's , others 1-2 month's ( 18-22 people)
All co-workers in building and other people I work with by email and phone the day I became official (> 150+ people)

I transitioned slowly in dress over a year's time wearing more and more feminine clothe and makeup. Prior to my official announcement I started wearing a Bra permanently for about 1 1/2 months. So I was out with people talking before the official announcement was made. It didn't bother me as I chose personal friends at work to talk with privately, so the overall impact was minimal. Kimberly Marie Kelly :battingeyelashes:

[melimelo]

I work for a large software company where each team works mainly on their own with occasional coordination meetings with other department. I simply could not meet every single person with which I have contact (>100) nor send a global e-mail to the company (>10000)...

I told my immediate supervisor 3-4 months notice, but HR and the women of the team (to settle the bathroom issue) has barely a week's notice. And the rest of the team was told Friday that I would come to work Monday as Melanie!

It's still pretty new, as I came out 2 weeks before Christmas, but it seems to go well. One thing I realized at some point is that this is a personal event, that does not affect my performance at work. So I'm not that keen to explain to hundreds of people how I felt and why I did this. If they have questions, they can come and ask me. Otherwise, let get back to business, please... I have a project to deliver for next week! :D

Cheers,

[Starling]

...my first day at work as Jenn won't be til Monday...

Jenn, it sounds like you've made all the right moves so far. Good luck, sweetheart, and Happy New Life.

:) Lallie

[Deborah_UK]

Even though my first day at work as Jenn won't be til Monday:




Me too!! :) (as Deborah not Jenn!! LOL)

A close colleague - last May
My direct Manager - 6 months
Her Manager (and area assistant director) 5 months
HR - 4 months
Close colleagues (who are friends too) 2 months
Other Mangers in my building - 2 months
Everyone else - 6 weeks

And just like Jenn, so far I've had nothing but positive feedback. Hopefully that will continue as I start actually coming to work as myself.

[Jennifer in CO]

My story is a bit different and is posted elsewhere here...
Notice?...instant and 3 days +-. Instant in that 2 managers and a co-worker found out at the chemical spill, 'bout 15 minutes later HR found out, 'bout an hour later HR told the plant manager and the owner of the company. I took the next few days off (at the direction of HR) and came back on the following Monday. On that Friday, the company owner and manager held several plant wide meetings (about 200 people in the company at that time) and explained what I was going thru (based on what my Doc told them of the study and its "unfortunate" side effects) with the owner telling everyone that if they had a problem either see him, keep it to themselves, or leave now with recommendation. Anyone with a problem after Monday morning would be fired. Monday morning the only difference between the previous Wednesday and then was I didn't wear a tight t shirt and didn't wear a bra under my regular shirt. Got some looks, got 99% support from everyone else. By the end of the week HR asked me to go back to wearing a bra (seems perk breasts under a t shirt with no bra are distracting to some people). Within 6 weeks I had totally transitioned to coming to work/presenting as female with no problems.

Jenn

[KaraChristine]

I started about 6 months before going full time by asking around at a trans support group for a lawyer who might have experience dealing with transgender employment issues. I spoke to the lawyer and on her advice, notified my company about 3 months before presenting full time. They chose to extend a medical leave during the transition which actually worked out well for all !

Good luck :hugs:

[Teri Jean]

I started the process in July 09 and told HR the first part of Aug. It was not until the end of August did I tell my supervisor why I was going for therapy and since he has been in my corner. Then the last week of September the HR department went out and had the meetings with co-workers and departments of the university that are under my care. The first week in October was the first I came to work full time as a woman.

Would I change anything(?), I would tighten the time of information coming out between my work and off work groups. The rumor mill went from the off site groups and onsite workers in the matter of one week so the news was out before the meetings on campus.

Oh well stuff happens. The up side is the freedom to be myself and enjoy myself as me.

Teri

[Angel.Marie76]

I'm in process as we speak:

HR, Nov. 2009:
(announced ~1 year warning, with a mid-2010 plan to start HRT)
Co-workers, 'Friends': Currently, one at a time.. (with >1yr noted)
Co-workers, Manager: ET mid-year 2010, give or take, in person
Co-workers, General: probably with a letter, 1 month from F/T.
...with F/T @ work tenatively planned for late 2010 / early 2011.

I also told them I would keep them informed of anything significant that may come up in the future that might affect employees / workflow.

I came out to HR so much in advance now because I'm starting to bump into coworkers outside the office, while dressed, and am not necessarily talking to them about it afterwards. I simply declared that I would like to keep the mangement informed so that if a rumor stirred they would be preparred with a statement - That I've come out as TG, and plan to transition in the near future.

I don't feel that I need a do-over at this point, I think things are going as I would hope. I am out more and more outside the office and around town, etc. As more coworkers pick up the rumor off the books, the more I perhaps won't have to 'drop it in their laps all at once' to deal with.

[carolinoakland]

Well, my union doesn't have a HR dept. i've pretty much had to make my own way of it... kind of sucks. I come out every time I show up for work. Or just do stealth... no wait! I just be me and they figure it out. One of the turning points is when I realized
"OK, I'm transitioning, so I guess I better stop being IN transition and start being what I am...Carol" That was probably as clear as mud and just as helpful. carol

[Jennifer Marie P.]

I told my HR dept 6 months and most of my co-workers already knew about it it was no sweat.

[Frances]

I forgot an important detail: When the letter was sent out to the employees (1 year after notifying HR and 6 months before going full-time), I asked the company to change the non-discrimination clause to include gender identity.