I only dressed 4 times last year.... So why am I not depressed?

[Karren H]

Oh yeah... Was going through my photos and sorting them... By date and location and .... You know........ Anal engineer syndrome.... But I soon realized I only had 3 folders for 2009... And I new I dressed once without taking photos.... (I must have been ill). So that 4... Compared to 100's of folders in 05, 06, 07, 08.......... And the reason is mainly due to the economy and things at work.. Less travel and have a trainee who I send out in the field... (And no he wouldn't fit into my clothes!!!)

But surprising to me is I do not feel bad about this at all... A few years ago I might have but there is so much more to my life than just crossdressing.... Maybe I've grown or matured... I'm always remodeling something at home, currently finishing a new oak starrway and railing... Have to put a new power steering pump on the van.... Rebuilt my Megatouch Evo ion bar game system... Exersizing daily. Playing ice hockey twice a week.... Kids alwyas need attention... Work is crazy... Taking the wife to see Cirque De Sole's Dream illumination tonight.. .. Posting online here and modding on makeuptalk. And on and on.... If I get 5 hours sleep a night I'm lucky.

I have been under dressing a bit more over the holidays... But though I don't dress hardly at all lately......... I still talk about it and shop for stuff and buy makeup.... (Though that has fallen off). So on a daily basis I'm getting my fill of crossdressing without actually crossdressing... I have no real need to show everyone the "real" me... I'm not really obsessing over crossdressing..... Don't get me wrong I would jump at the chance to jump into a dress... It just doesn't bother me that I'm not...

I really have a hard time relating to all the doom and glomm I read here.... And I really have no clue why I started this rambling thread.... .except to say.... That you be happy with the cards your dealt.. They are hardly ever the ones you wanted... But with some effort and the right attitude you can make it work and be pretty damn happy!!! Whether you like it or not! Hahaha.

Crossdressing is supposed to be fun!!!! Celebrate it every day like its your last....

Ok... I'm putting my pom poms away and going back to work!! :)

[jenna_woods]

I agree I dress every chance I get and love it

[Kimmy55]

I at least underdress every day and have been wearing my 36C forms almost daily( did I mention it's been very cold here in Texas and big jackets are the norm) but on days I dont I feel ok with not dressing.Although it does make you look foward with much more anticipation to the next oportunity

[ikatrina]

maybe you're just settling into a more typical "middle-aged" male or female lifestyle, where you really only would get dressed-up 3 or 4 times a year :)

[Tamara Croft]

I think you're just getting old Karren :raspp:

:hiding:

:bs:

[SuzanneBender]

Karren you just show that no matter what we have on the outside we are ourselves on the inside. I just love being femme and I miss it when I can't express it.

Are those Penguin or Steelers Pom Poms?

[Karren H]

I think you're just getting old Karren :raspp:

:hiding:

:bs:


Now I'm depressed!!!

Getting?? I've gotten... Then some.. Sigh.

[Tamara Croft]

Aww, it's ok :bh: When I get to your age, I'll cry with you :lol:

[Wen4cd]

My theory is that once you've brought in all the stuff that really matters into your personality, dressing then becomes secondary or tertiary. You know you're both and neither gender at once, and how you dress becomes external.

What's inside, even if originally discovered through dressing, stays with you no matter what you're wearing, after you make friends with it, and the training wheels become no longer necessary for this or that trait to express.

It's a good thing, fulfillment.

[Miranda09]

I like your attitude Karern, and it's pretty much the way I feel as well. As much as I love to dress, I'm not going to let it take over my life...there's so much more to do. I don't know, maybe it has something to do with being in my 50's and developing a clearer outlook on life. Whatever the reason, I'm having fun. :)

[Tess]

It just shows that you are living a well balanced life without becoming obsessed by any particular facet of your personality. We either adapt to our circumstances and live a happy life or its doom and gloom.

[JenniferR771]

oK Karren, perhaps this is a good sign. I have a friend who is affected by the pink cloud (two actually) (three if you include myself). When does the intense craving and obsession relax its hold on you? If I built an oak bannister--would it help?

[AllieSF]

Great thread Karren. And yes when we are older than dirt (I like to say as old as a rock before it erodes into dirt). Right now, I do have the opportunity to go out dressed and I take advantage of it when I can. However, I do not have all those other just as important and almost as important and not important activities that you do, since I am kinda stuck in this Pink stuff for now. I do hope that I can change that somewhat this year, so that when I do need to cut back on my dressing due to maybe having an SO, a real job or whatever, I will have those other activities to keep me busy and as happy as I am today! Thanks again for bringing reality into this life of ours, as you so well do in your posts.

[LisaElizabeth]

Karen,
I look back and it has been OVER 1 year since I last dressed. I attended the Chicago Gender society christmas Party in december of 2008. That was the last time Lisa was out and about. Am I sad? No. Am I angry? No. Do I miss going out as Lisa? Apparently not! Will I go out again as Lisa? Most likely!! When? No idea!
Like you said, personal activities have kept me very busy and I truly have not had time to dress for a 'girl's night Out'.
Since seeing Lisa in full dress and going out a few times a year since 2003, I just do not have a desire to 'underdress' anymore. It's either all or nothing for me at the moment.
Maybe if I get the 4 cars rebuilt, the sunroom built, the new garage up, put in some solar panels and a couple low speed wind turbines, I'll find time for Lisa again!!
Oh, that's if the kids don't start providing grandchildren!! that will take up more time!!
But such is my life! I won't purge anything, since I'm certain what I do have is generic enough it will be 'in style' for a little longer and if not then I'll add a top or buy a skirt to update things!!
Hey! I can ramble too!!
Lisa E

[ReineD]

Karen, I am so happy to have read your post! :hugs: Not because you are dressing less, but because you are not plagued with a ceaseless, unsatisfiable craving that takes you away from the other things you enjoy doing.

I like what Wen said. :)

[Viv]

I still talk about it and shop for stuff and buy makeup.... (Though that has fallen off).


Did no one pick up on the fact that Karren isn't buying that much makeup anymore!?! Impostor!! Not really her that posted this :laughing:

Honestly, as long as one is content, that's all that matters.

[Karren H]

My theory is that once you've brought in all the stuff that really matters into your personality, dressing then becomes secondary or tertiary. You know you're both and neither gender at once, and how you dress becomes external.

What's inside, even if originally discovered through dressing, stays with you no matter what you're wearing, after you make friends with it, and the training wheels become no longer necessary for this or that trait to express.

It's a good thing, fulfillment.

Yes!! And it is very fulling...


Great thread Karren. And yes when we are older than dirt (I like to say as old as a rock before it erodes into dirt). ............. Thanks again for bringing reality into this life of ours, as you so well do in your posts.

Why do I say exactually the same phrase? GE 101 maybe? Lol.

I do have my wife to thank... Though now a hobby fan.... She is the ultimate bringer backer to reality.


Karen, I am so happy to have read your post! :hugs: Not because you are dressing less, but because you are not plagued with a ceaseless, unsatisfiable craving that takes you away from the other things you enjoy doing.

I like what Wen said. :)

I've always said.... Family first...... Then work and friends..... If and when there is time left then I can claim it as mine... Great. If not that great too..

[victoriamwilliams1]

I thought I was the only one who tracked my dressing in folders:) I did not count mine for last year and I had to dress because of stress! I do understand about 4 times a year:) Not need to stress it just means you found the balance.

[SherriePall]

Glad you are not depressed about not dressing, Karren. But the gentleman attendant at that rest area where you used to change is really depressed because he hasn't seen you for a while.

[kristinacd55]

Karren, sounds like ur too busy to crossdress. Just stop all those other projects & get to it!! :itsok:
That's why they closed our rest areas here in joisey!! Too many crossdressers, and no attendants!

[Karren H]

That's too funny Sherrie because I stopped at that rest area the other day and he did not recoginize me any more!! Lol. I keep thinking I need to go do that again... It was a blast... Wonder what my schedule looks like tommorow? :D

[Nicole Erin]

I think you're just getting old Karren :raspp:

:hiding:

:bs:
GYOD Tamara, you are worse than people thought!

Now Karren, the reason you are not depressed is cause you are not emo.

[Tamara Croft]

GYOD Tamara, you are worse than people thought!OI! :slap: it's not my fault Karren is getting too old to dress is it :eek:


:hiding:

(she'll be wearing granny slips and fluffy slipper boots, with her hair in curlers and a blue rinse)

:devil:

[Karren H]

I'd reply to that buy I accidentially crushed my tri-focals with my walker trying to ring the nurse!! Sigh...

[ReineD]

I've always said.... Family first...... Then work and friends..... If and when there is time left then I can claim it as mine... Great. If not that great too..

Don't get me wrong. I don't believe that CDing should come last. CDers also have needs that are just as important. I meant that it is sometimes hard for a CDer seeking to achieve a balance (who does not wish to go full-time), to do this happily when she is constantly yearning to dress. The yearning and craving takes her away, in spirit, from enjoying the other parts of her life. Then it seems as if the rest of her life is flat. :sad:

[Tess]

Did no one pick up on the fact that Karren isn't buying that much makeup anymore!?!

Now we know why the economy sucks.

[Karren H]

Now we know why the economy sucks.

I sold all my L'oreal stock just in the nick of time!! Maybe I shouldn't have said that... Bordering on insider trading! Lol.

[Kate Simmons]

You have a full life my friend. CDing is only a part of it. You're always my hero anyway.:battingeyelashes::):hugs:

[msniki48]

Karen, I know i''m new here, and I must say from the way you carry yourself, i thought you wer always dressing.


I sort of purged this summer...stopped dressing....didn't get rid of the clothes... My therapist said when you need her she will be there. i have needed her of late, and that is why i am at this site. you girls have really touched on alot of what goes on in our heads....finding balance...being the woman on the inside and not needing to dress to still let her shine...i agree with all these things. the one thing that gets me is when i am just going about the house with not a care....[cause i am in niki mode, but not dressed]....and suddenly i come to a mirror.....oooops the wrong person is looking at me. it still hits me like a smack!

I am so glad you don't get depressed as you go about your life....maybe you have found balance

than again....maybe your just freekin old!;)

just some thoughts


hugs

msniki48

[susie evans]

KARREN

it's not all bad you are probaly like me even thoe i have not been out and about as much i make sure the quality of the outing is good

:hugs: susie

[docrobbysherry]

Then, I read your post. It made me happy that YOU'RE so happy! THAT'S what life is all about, my friends!:thumbsup:


I'd reply to that buy I accidentially crushed my tri-focals with my walker trying to ring the nurse!! Sigh...

All u youngsters bragging/complaining about old age; to me u ALL sound like 16 y/o boys talking about all the sex u had last weekend! U REALLY HAVE NO IDEA! :brolleyes:

But, with any luck, you'll ALL get old as dirt!:devil:

[Stephanie-L]

Karren, Like you I had very limited chance to dress in the last year, and also I am not depressed about it. I am envious of those who can dress often and especially of those who travel dressed, and I do miss dressing, more along the lines of thinking my skills are getting rusty. One of the things that has helped me keep my sanity regarding dressing is the fellowship gained here on this forum. Reading and posting messages and emailing friends helps make life a bit easier. Anyway, you are something of a hero to many of us here, and I always look forward to reading your posts.......Stephanie

[cindychan]

Well sometimes I view crossdressing as a specail event in which the other me needs to come out(like a holiday or ritual ). Its a way to celebrate yourself and destress that has no minimum or maxium frequency requirements. I crossdress about 2-3x's a month and thats just fine and I don't feel depressed. I also express my femme side through artwork, playing as female online game characters, and having TG movie nights. It's a good life!:dom:

[Chari]

IMO, and from a fashion viewpoint, it is not how often we dress, but how well! Certain that the four times you did dress were in outfits that were co-ordinated and your makeup flawless, as usual - and I'm not refering to your ice hockey uniform!

[KarenHiller]

I really have a hard time relating to all the doom and glomm I read here.... And I really have no clue why I started this rambling thread.... .except to say.... That you be happy with the cards your dealt.. They are hardly ever the ones you wanted... But with some effort and the right attitude you can make it work and be pretty damn happy!!! Whether you like it or not! Hahaha.

Usually we deal ourselves the cards we get, so "deal" with it! :devil:

The other Karen :heehee:

[Lisalove1976]

Some times I feel the need to dress often and other times the urge is more peacefull, I guess you are in your confort zone and that's what really matters.

B.T.W. for someone that only dressed 4 times you did a GREAT job each time.

[Tamara Croft]

All u youngsters bragging/complaining about old age; to me u ALL sound like 16 y/o boys talking about all the sex u had last weekend! U REALLY HAVE NO IDEA! :brolleyes:Well I hope I don't sound like a 16yr old boy... seeing as I've never been one :slap:


But, with any luck, you'll ALL get old as dirt!:devil:Yeah but you're old already :raspp:

:hiding:

[Brandi Wyne]

Karen,
It is so true that CDing shouldn't become some sort of maddening competition if it's who we are and we are comfortable with that. I have only recently really begun to reach out to discover Barb, and that journey has been one filled with a lot of emotions and conflicts.

For me, the obsession takes over like a starving person who is finally getting to eat again. Now I am at another point and have been asking myself just how important is it to dress so much or so often.

Thanks for a friendly and frank viewpoint.

XXs,

[DAVIDA]

Hi Karen!
I am pretty happy also! But, I can't think of four days last year that I didn't dress.:daydreaming:
It doesn't bother me to be either way. I am pretty much the same no matter what I happen to be wearing at the time.:D

[SherriePall]

Well, Karren, it is now today and all of the CD'ers on this forum want to know if you went down to the rest area all dressed up to give that poor depressed man some cheering up! Hope you wore a nice skirt set and not a pair of jeans!

[Karren H]

But, I can't think of four days last year that I didn't dress.

Have I told you I hated you lately?? :D

After having a wonderful tine together at Cirque De Sole last night, my wife just anounced that she wants to go visit her mother for a few weeks.... (YES!!!!!) And I say.. "When WE going?". "You want to come along?" "Sure if you need my help with anything". She really wants the van up there so said we could drive up and I could fly home then fly back when she's ready to come home!!


:)


2010 may be better than 2009... I need to loose 10 pounds...

[shadyterri]

Well I will admit I do get depressed if I can not fully dress more often than 4 times a year. And in my experience as I age I still have that strong urge. Even while on my Flomax the urge has not decreased.

[Karren H]

Well, Karren, it is now today and all of the CD'ers on this forum want to know if you went down to the rest area all dressed up to give that poor depressed man some cheering up! Hope you wore a nice skirt set and not a pair of jeans!

Ohh yeah.... Sooo close!! But instead I went to the dentist... She is a uber cute hockey fanatic...... so got my tooth repaired and a fill of the latest hockey news and then met my wife for lunch and am back at work... Almost the same thing? Right?

[Sandygal]

Hi Karen...Its good that your home more and dressing less. Now you will have more time with your inventions. We are waiting for more breast enlargement machines....get crackin!

[michelle64]

i went out 3 times...i feel just fine as well..no worries

[Karren H]

i went out 3 times...i feel just fine as well..no worries

Three?? I think I'd be depressed if I only did three!! :D