Is she accepting?

[brittany]

Wow. Here lately my gf has been acting great! I mean I am still very much in the closet and I can not tell if she has any idea that i dress but it has been fun here lately.
The other night we were messing around and I made a joke that I was gonna put her pantyhose on. Well she told me i wouldnt so a few min. later I went and put them on. We had a great night messing around while I was wearing them! It would have been a great opportunity to tell her that I liked wearing them but i just told her i did it bc she told me I wouldnt. Well now somehow she told me to wear a dress somewhere and I told her I would but she doesnt believe me. If it had been a different event I would deff have worn it. Now she wants to dress me uompletely and take me out just bc she doesnt think i will let her. At least that is what she says. I love the idea and deff told her we could for it with alot of rules.
My question is: does she know and she is just trying to get me to tell her? I mean i hint and joke around alot so i wonder if she has caught on but i have never told anyone that I know.

What do yall think? Does she know or is just innocent fun?

[Kerigirl2009]

Innocent fun most likely. But have fun with it while you can and if it goes on for a while and she still wants to see you dressed. Then tell her what you are thinking. Have fun girl.

[Emma Leigh]

Why would she know, unless you have hinted about it to her? No,I think from what you have said, its probably just innocent fun, but it could lead to an oppertunity to come out to her, if thats what you want.

[joandher]

I would wait until that happens,and if she is still happy with it suggest that you would like to do it again, and that you enjoyed it ,then let her take the lead

hugs j-jay

[Holly]

Brittany, I don't know if she knows or not. If you dropped lots of "hints" then maybe she does. At any rate, it doesn't matter. If you decide to go through with it, then you better be prepared to share the whole thing with her... because if you don't, and it comes out later that you had been CDing before, she is likely to be very upset that you deceived her. And actually you couldn't ask for a better lead in to getting it out into the open. I hope it goes well with you and her.

[RADER]

brittany
Go for it; Play dumb and try this new game out. It just might suprize you.
She thinks that you will back down, so when doing all of this "dressing"
sound just a little reluctant. But with the conviction that you will call
her bluff. Have fun Rader :)

[Sally2005]

I messed it up... did this with my wife years ago and I was too scared and didn't really understand myself then so I couldn't talk to her about it. If I did it now, after I have accepted my feelings, I would just consider it good fun (you don't want to ruin the fun for her by making it a life event), but I would tell her I enjoyed it. I would try to include her (you have to know her well to use the right tact) and see if I could make it a challenge for her...say something like, "that was fun, but I could never pass without major work"...she might say, "oh a little makeup etc etc..." and you say, "okay, well if you could make me pass, you've got a new girlfriend!... but seriously, pick a day and I would be fun to see if it actually possible or not." ... after some playing around she is bound to ask you some of the questions...do you want to be a woman etc?... this is what I messed up, I said it was only for fun and went in to hiding and what I should have said was, I don't think so, but I feel like I need to have some fun with it if you are game... would have made a world of difference. Just be confident and accepting of yourself and she should buy in.

[sherri52]

I think she knows or at least suspects something and is apparantly ok with it and letting you know. Now she wants to see how far it can go.

[jessikasummerfox]

A word of caution though: playing around with clothes associated with the opposite gender is one thing, coming out as a crossdresser is something else.

It certainly could be possible that each of you is trying to tease a little more information and fun out of these events. I wish I was in a similar situation, as long as it stayed light-hearted. However, it is also possible that she is fine with playing around clothes, but totally not fine with your coming out as a crossdresser.

My ex-GF suggested on a couple of different occasions that I wear her leggings or some other article of her feminine clothing when I needed to wear something of mine that was in the wash. She was fine with that. But, she had a negative reaction when the whole crossdressing thing eventually came out into the open. After the initial shock and curiosity wore off, she determined that she didn't like it. I spent a few weeks or so trying to unsuccessfully manage her mis-perceptions. She finally decided cross-dressing was wrong in principle, and that I was wrong to do it.

Your situation may be (and probably will) different from mine. All I am saying is: if you're not prepared for both possibilities, good and bad, then you may not be ready to come out to her yet.

[lingerieLiz]

Time to come out. One of the problems is that we often tend to spin it in a very negative light. Your gf already has a positive attitude toward it. If you hide it and she finds out later that you fully enjoy it she may well feel deceived. It is not fair to her to withhold it from her. She should understand it to the full scope. Put a positive spin on it that you like to wear gg clothes and where you stand on relationships or progression.

I feel it is very wrong not to tell a future SO and then have her find out 5, 10, 20 years later that you have been hiding it. Then complain that she can not understand. It will cause you, her, and any children great grief. If she does not want to accept you now she will not accept it later and hate you for it. This is not an indictment of CDers who realize it later, but if you are on this board you know.

[kimdl93]

I would definately take her up on it at the first opportunity and enjoy it....and afterward, just quietly let her know that you LIKE it. I don't think it will be hard for her to accept if she's already encouraging it and wants to take you out.

[SamanthaS]

Sounds like she was ok with some aspect of it, so you should sit her down and tell her. That is, if you plan on staying with her long-term. Right now she's just a girl-friend, not a wife. If it doesn't work out after you tell her, you can go on your own way and she her's. If you don't tell her and later on marry her, your screwed because you didnt' tell her before the marriage. You don't have anything to loose now :)

[Bev06 GG]

Hi Brittany,
I dont suppose its crossed your mind that she might be trying to tell you something. CDs tend always to think that their partners are going to dislike this aspect of their personality. Its a known fact that some women do actually like it, it is a real turn on for them, some even go so far as to seek one out. It could be that she's the one testing the waters to gauge what your reaction might be. I can almost hear you all shaking your head in disbelief but believe me men aren't the only ones who like to have a bit of fun you know. Why dont you ask her, after all you dont have to come out to question her sexuality, youde just be showing a healthy interest in your partner and trying to understand her. Isn't that what we women are always wanting from our men.
take care
Bev

[NikiMichelle]

I think she has an idea about you....but either way do not A-S-S-U-M-E anything as we all know how this word works.

Since she is not hostile towards this why not just come out with it??? I wish I had come out to my wife much sooner than I did.

[sesissy]

Whatever you decide, just make sure honesty is involved. There is nothing worse in a developing (or long term) relationship than finding out that your partner is deceitful.

[Marissa Mae]

In my experiences with dating, on many, many occasions I have had girls do innocent "femmy things" to me: one girl painted my toenails, another my fingernails, one put a bra on, another had me carry her purse. The best was when the girl who painted my toes saw a pair of boots I had in my closet... I told her they were from a Halloween costume. She dared me to wear them out and later wanted me to order some ones that were less risque (should have kept that one)... its all good fun, but I can't say for sure how it would turn out if you suddenly converted to "I actually enjoy wearing these clothes, here, look at alllllllllll my shoes and skirts and wigs blah blah" :heehee: I think girls just like seeing how far you will compromise your manhood for them haha

My current gf of 4 years didn't know about my dressing in the slightest, and she too innocently joked about it. Somewhere along the lines of

"you know, I could wear heels like those"

And she says "I bet you couldn't, you wouldn't last a day!"

I say "Let's place that bet"

She replies "Where are we going to find boots your size?" :D

Later on I actually came out to her, and while it didn't go badly, it didn't exactly go over too well either. It was a long period of simple acceptance, denial, questions. Right now she is tolerant but likes to ignore it completely; when I bring it up, quickly changes the subject. I can't say I am miserable because every other aspect of our relationship is great, except this big part of me that she shuns. So yeah, be ready to have your relationship and dressing habits dynamically change if you decide to tell her. Like everyone else says, be honest with her and yourself, and take it slooooooowww.

Lastly, that one girl I mentioned earlier (painted toes, went out w/ me wearing boots), I caller her one day to catch up, and I told her about Marissa. She took it well, was really curious about that side of me. Then I asked her: "if we were dating and I told you, what would you think?", and she flat out said that it wouldn't have went over well, that she would feel weird because she wants a man, plain and simple. So you never know how they will react, but I don't think there is anyway you can't tell them unless you want to keep repressing such a huge part of you.