Forks in the Road, Sliding Doors & Watershed Moments

[FionaAlexis]

There are moments in all of our lives when we zig when we might just as easily have zagged. Those 50/50 moments of decision when you are tossing a coin in your mind to select the next step. Or like ‘Sliding Doors’, by a quirk of fate, you’ve missed a connection or an opportunity or whatever that has then resulted in something great. Or when because of some personal trial or trauma you’ve re-evaluated yourself or your life.

When I was around 20 I found a job in London and moved there to live mainly so that I could find a way to live my life as a female. After about 9 months I was pretty unhappy and I went home for the Christmas period. My father was taking me to the ferry and, on the way, we had a ‘heart to heart’ chat. At one point he said I only had to say the word and he’d turn around a go home and I could a job in Ireland. It was a cold, wet, late December day and I was very tempted not to go back to my shared flat in London but I did. On the way I picked up a copy of Forum magazine, found an article on transvestism and a contact address at the Beaumont Society. Within a few months I had connected in real life with other trannies for the first time in my life. I had moved into my own bedsit and I had put together a wardrobe of clothes.

I have corresponded with other TGs who have finally accepted who they are or that life was too short…or whatever – and they have started dressing from point after years of suppression. One had this realization and acceptance in a fox hole in Bosnia. Another after being kicked out of the armed forces through ill health. Another after the end of a period of therapy for another issue.

Have you zigged when you could just as easily have zagged, have you had a quirk of fate or a watershed moment that has changed your world? And thereafter you….start dressing…or joined the local CD/TG group….or came out….or went public…or just decided to be yourself ???


Fiona xx

[Clare]

Well, i'm hoping for one right about now!

My life is currently s*** and i see no future for me as things stand. I desperately need one of your quirky moments that are life changing. Can you arrange one for me?

But in all seriousness, i have always been a person in 'control' and never left things to fate as such. Everything has been planned and organised in my life to some extent - maybe thats why it's all come crashing down around me?

Perhaps I needed to take a chance on one of those zig/zag opportunities! I know that in the future i'll be sure not to miss them and to 'take a punt'. (Aussie slang Tristen).

Christine

[FionaAlexis]

Christine,

Sounds like you're having one of those traumatic watershed periods right now? These periods pass but I'm sure it will impact on your life from here on.

Good luck!

Fiona xx

[kathy gg]

hi Fiona,

I thought this was such an interesting post. My life has been full of zig's and zag's and unplanned events. Most of my friends that have known me any length of time are always amazed that for being as spontaneous as I am that somehow I always land on my feet.

Almost every chance I have ever taken on a person or a career or something, altough terrifying usually worked out to a better place than where I started. I often think about all the different paths that I could have been down had I made the 'grown-up' decision and I am glad I was reckless. Being so open to what ever comes my way landed me my wonderful husband, and I think we both took huge chances by having a long distance internt romance. I mean, I moved to a new country and changed pretty much everything about my life to be with my hubby. I am glad that I was adventorus, becuase sticking to the straight and narrow would have kept me maybe in 'status -quo'land but without the true happiness that I have now.

Three cheers for all those who choose the raod less traveled.

hugs
kathy in canada


There are moments in all of our lives when we zig when we might just as easily have zagged. Those 50/50 moments of decision when you are tossing a coin in your mind to select the next step. Or like ‘Sliding Doors’, by a quirk of fate, you’ve missed a connection or an opportunity or whatever that has then resulted in something great. Or when because of some personal trial or trauma you’ve re-evaluated yourself or your life.

When I was around 20 I found a job in London and moved there to live mainly so that I could find a way to live my life as a female. After about 9 months I was pretty unhappy and I went home for the Christmas period. My father was taking me to the ferry and, on the way, we had a ‘heart to heart’ chat. At one point he said I only had to say the word and he’d turn around a go home and I could a job in Ireland. It was a cold, wet, late December day and I was very tempted not to go back to my shared flat in London but I did. On the way I picked up a copy of Forum magazine, found an article on transvestism and a contact address at the Beaumont Society. Within a few months I had connected in real life with other trannies for the first time in my life. I had moved into my own bedsit and I had put together a wardrobe of clothes.

I have corresponded with other TGs who have finally accepted who they are or that life was too short…or whatever – and they have started dressing from point after years of suppression. One had this realization and acceptance in a fox hole in Bosnia. Another after being kicked out of the armed forces through ill health. Another after the end of a period of therapy for another issue.

Have you zigged when you could just as easily have zagged, have you had a quirk of fate or a watershed moment that has changed your world? And thereafter you….start dressing…or joined the local CD/TG group….or came out….or went public…or just decided to be yourself ???


Fiona xx

[FionaAlexis]

Thank you Kathy.

Your story is certainly a total adventure and very romantic. Many of us toy with the idea of changing the cornerstones of our lives but few, in the end, have the intestinal fortitude to do it. And you can usually find family and friends who will tell you that you are being foolish and happy to talk you out of it.

Having changed countries myself - I know what a huge step that is - even when the country you are moving to seems very frendly and somehow familiar - like Australia - or Canada in your case.

Meeting on the internet and then falling in love is quite amazing, and inspirational in some ways. Having chatted on the 'net quite a bit I can understand how you really get to know the other person very well if you chat regularly over a period - and maybe more so than through normal dating? On another site I read a post by another Irish-Australian tranny who has recently become engaged to a Dutch woman and they plan to live in Ireland.

I'm glad everything has worked out so well for you both.


Fiona xx