CD,ing in the family and it passing down .

[pernille d]

this is may be a question for the older ones amongst us , but i am welcome for imput from all sides .

i was just wondering if any of you that have heard or have first hand experience that being a cd can be in passed down in the family , like from father to son .

i ask as i have a 14 year old son that we have been having a lot of problems with ( like you do with teenagers but there is more ) we know there is something bottled up inside him that he is not telling us My wife works away alot and i have noticed the last few times my son has called me for no reason to find out exatctly what time i am home ,i know he has no friends home so this is makeing me wonder what is up to or he is hideing , ( i know from myself i call my wife so not to be caught out .so is it a case of father like son ???? )

[sherri52]

There is no way of knowing from his behavior. Have you had a father/son talk with him and are you willing to come out to him if it comes down to it. He could be CD, Bi, or Gay and keeping it all inside of him. As long as your with him and talk it may come out. all I can say for sure is that you have to support him in whatever it is that bothers him. If he needs counciling get it for him. Your talking on his level may be all that he needs. Good luck

[Mary Morgan]

Teenagers have alot of issues and their behavior may appear secretive and private as to most of them. If he is dressing, just leave it be and you'll find out sooner or later. If his behavior is destructive or harming him, get professional help. He may be having the usual issues associated with growong up, drugs, peers, girls, school, etc. Above all, make sure he knows that you are there for him.

[kimdl93]

To answer your question - I don't know of any examples, but I would not be entirely surprised. Still, I think it would be adviseable to separate the issues.

As stated above, teenage years a difficult for nearly every kid and nearly every parent. Watch out for signals of significant behavioral issues, and as Mary said, seek appropriate professional support when needed., but most ofall be there for him every day.

[StephanieH]

I think it is genetic, or hereditary, or whatever. I believe my much younger brother dresses as well, based on some of his behavior and a lot of other factors, but obviously, since he doesn't know about me, I'm not going to bring the subject up. Wouldn't surprise me a bit to see a bunch of heels in his closet, and he's fourteen-years younger than me! :)

[Sandra65]

Teenagers have alot of issues and their behavior may appear secretive and private as to most of them. If he is dressing, just leave it be and you'll find out sooner or later. If his behavior is destructive or harming him, get professional help. He may be having the usual issues associated with growong up, drugs, peers, girls, school, etc. Above all, make sure he knows that you are there for him.

Totally agree with your advice Mary.

We've had issues with my son but I've always considered them as being typical of teenage boys and have seen no signals or evidence to indicate that he may be crossdressing. Given how discreet we all try to be however, you would never know if your brothers or father also crossdressed.

I have to be honest though and say that it is my fervant prayer that he doesn't inherit this trait. I know that this may run counter to the general consensus that society should be more tolerant of us, but I really don't want to him to wrestle with this like I have for the last 35 years. One minute I am comfortable with being in skirts, panthyhose and heels, then the next I am wracked with guilt.

[Jamz1b]

For me and most of us at that age, it was the dressing. For others though, it was something else. Just do your best to create a good open relationship where he can feel ok to talk about things. I know that the one time I was confronted with my dressing I just went right on the defensive and ended all talks. Looking back I feel that my mom was doing her best to be understanding. That was my fault for not taking her up on the effort.

This may happen with him, but you can just continue to be a good and loving parent and show that.

Though if you really want I am sure there are very subtle ways you can figure out, similar to the "dropping hints" idea most have with testing out the SO's acceptance. This may or may not help.

Long story short don't push any thing and be open to chit chat.

Ever find any thing of yours or moms things "rearranged"?

[Tonya Stolenski]

at some point just let him know that no matter what you'll understand and not think any differently of him... if my father and myself were closer i would probly long for him to ask me about this kinda thing. the subtile hints is a good thing to i think... mainly just stay open to anything he may have to tell you.

i sure do remember runing through the house ripping off clothes as my mom come home.... lol.. ahh memorys

[Alice Torn]

It seems like it , or leg fetishes, at least, are traits me, my brothers, and physical father have. No doubt about it, my dad, at 89, still has leg fetishes, and it would not surprise me, if all crossdressed some. I was about 14, when i first started, and i kept it bottled up. My parents did try to get me to go to psychiatrist, but i wouldn't go. My dad would not go with me, either! He's got lifetime secret issues, still bottled up, and now, he wants me to move in with him. It will be a living hell. If you are relaxed, tolerant, yet strong with your son, he may be open, but, he may be so ashamed, that he will not give any info.

[PippaJ]

If he's anything like i am/was he probably wont tell you about whatever he may be hiding, so your best bet is to go to him and ask.

[Elle1946]

I think that my father was. We never talked about it and I never saw him dressed. It is just a feeling that I got by some of the things he said. My daughter only dresses in what I would call mens clothing, jeans and t shirts. She has no hose, dresses or skirts. So, it may cross gender lines from father to son to daughter. I know that that is a heavy thought.

[Loni]

if you must know....then install a secret ccw cam.:eek:

if not then let life take it course.

might try leaving a book or to "just laying about" dealing with cross dressing.

has your wifes panties gone missing?

not a expert..but once was one. lots of problems in a kids life. even just not being able to "make the grade" with friends...or at school?

i say try to talk...but let things go there own way.

.

[Kerigirl2009]

I hope not, Please no because I have 3 sons and a daughter. This would devestate my wife I think and I too would wonder what I could have done different.
As a parent and a Crossdresser we do have an advantage, we know the hiding spots that we used when we where their age.
I would probably cry if I found out one of my children had this feature added to their life. But I would ALWAYS support them and if they asked offer advice.
If you are concerned then you should do a light search, not evasive but make sure things are normal for a teenage boy. Good luck and blessings

[sissystephanie]

As others have said, I sure hope not! I am neither a Doctor or a Therapist, but I have been a CD for 70 years so have learned a few things. My late wife and I also raised two lovely children, a girl and a boy. Neither had dressing problems, but plenty of other ones like all teen agers.

I don't think CD'ing is something that be passed down by heredity, but what do I know? If you have computers at home he may be doing something there that he doesn't want known. He may just be lonely, which does happen to teen age boys sometimes. As has been suggested have a talk with him and see if you can draw him out about his life!! Good Luck!:hugs:

[Kelly DeWinter]

My parent meeter in ringing warning bells on this.

If he is having problems and cal to know exactly what time you will be home you can be assured something is up, but you will need to deterimine what it is.

. A girl over
. Drugs
. Drinking

would be my main concern.

I would count crossdressing as a blessing not something to be worried about.

Kelly

[Fab Karen]

Your son may be trying to hide something like drug use or looking at porn- odds of him also being a CD are pretty unlikely.


and I too would wonder what I could have done different.

Nothing, as sexuality or being TG is not caused by parents actions/behavior.


My daughter only dresses in what I would call mens clothing, jeans and t shirts. She has no hose, dresses or skirts.
That is not MEN'S clothing, it is clothing, and very common for young women these days. That is not crossdressing.

[pernille d]

i have my reasons to almost say 100% that drugs,girls and drink are out . that is why i wonder what he is up to .and you could be right that infact that it could be most simply that he is lonely .i just see a lot of me in him and he acts like me when i hide things , so i cant help but wonder !!!

of cause i am not worried about that i might be crossdressing, and in that area if i ever found out i hope i could help him by learning from my mistakes

[Frédérique]

i have a 14 year old son that we have been having a lot of problems with ( like you do with teenagers but there is more ) we know there is something bottled up inside him that he is not telling us My wife works away alot and i have noticed the last few times my son has called me for no reason to find out exatctly what time i am home ,i know he has no friends home so this is makeing me wonder what is up to or he is hideing

I’d like to think your son is crossdressing while nobody’s looking, but who knows? It’s certainly something worth hiding – so special you want to keep it to yourself and protect the “magic” of it all. I had ZERO time to myself while I was growing up, yet I was isolated within my family, mainly due to age difference. I found it nearly impossible to hide anything, but nowadays I’m free to be secretive. Fourteen is at (or near) that age when gender confusion is most confusing (for males), so hopefully that’s it, but I’m no child psychologist. I’d be amused to learn that crossdressing was “passed down” in my family, but, since nobody ever told me anything I wasn’t meant to hear, I’ll never know…:eek:

[Christina Horton]

Ok here's how I see it.

First in my family my dad is not a CD but he is very kinky in bed with his girl friend. I know that has nothing to do with CDing but hay it's not what most 60 some year old would do in bed.

Second my sister is gay and a very big Tom boy. She hates dresses skirt and makeup. Hell she really combs her hair. We are like we changed spots . I amid the girl and she the boy. Like my dad like to say " I lost a son and a daughter , but I gained a son and a daughter."

Third My uncle is a transvestite and wears only lingerie. My mothers brother.

So does it run in the family I would say yes. My grandpa might have been a cd and we never knew it.

Now what was he doing well it could be just as simple as he was just pleasuring himself and just wanted to know when he should be done by. There are lots of reason for the secrets and not all means he's a CD.

Now if it were me and my wife was ok with it I would tell him about my CDing and then tell him that since I was able to talk to him about something personal then his should feel free to do the same if her ever need to. Now it could back fire on you but it could be the door he was looking for to relieve his (guilt ,shame, and frustration) and may be he tells you he's a CD or gay or doing drugs ya know ETC. Just be ready for something to shock you and not what you may expect. I wish my dad was a CDer and told me when I was a kid . I know I would have told him after he (told me) and would have been much happier . But I know my dad is not a CDer and that make me a little sad but I love him and he love me. My whole family knows about my CDing and are now ok with it.

So just tread softly and just be there if he needs to talk.

[Paula_56]

I have a post op ts friend who's dad was TG.