Telling people about it...

[Neelix]

Hi,

I recently found the courage to tell my Cousin who is very open minded that i like to crossdress. He seemed to be ok with it....


So after that i went ahead and told it to a female coworker of mine, hoping that it after some time she would want to dress me up, but that wasnt the case...

After telling her, she seemed worried about my hobby... Now she swears she is gonna "FIX" me. I took my "Clothes" to her place asking her to wash them for me as i cant do that at my place, but after some psychological talk she convinced me to throw them away.


Although we are closer with her now, there is no chance of us having a relationship since she is 28 and i'm 22 and there's no chance of her dressing me up... What a letdown :(



I was wondering if someone here managed to create a relationship with a woman where the woman herself would want her man to dress as a woman.
I believe that the sex between a couple in such a relationship would be better than normal, can someone confirm this?

Thanks

[kimdl93]

Coming out to your cousin was fine - its good to be open with family. Coming out to the co worker was, I think, based on wishful thinking, rather than a genuine understanding of that individual.

I would very strongly advise against telling someone in the hope, based in nothing but hope, that she'll accept, encourage or even dress you. I'm glad you've been able to preserve a somewhat friendly relationship with her. At best you can hope that she'll leave well enough alone.


Hi,

I recently found the courage to tell my Cousin who is very open minded that i like to crossdress. He seemed to be ok with it....


So after that i went ahead and told it to a female coworker of mine, hoping that it after some time she would want to dress me up, but that wasnt the case...

[Neelix]

As i said, she now wants to "Fix" me by making me more manly, taking me to the gym, giving me nutritional advice and advising me on what cologne to wear or what shower gel to use...

She invited me over at her place alone yesterday we drank wine... I'm still confused on what her intentions might be.

[Presh GG]

Gosh, what a mess!

Ok, first please don't hand over your life to someone else. I am the 56 yr old wife of a cder. I don't mind if she dresses and I have much input but I don't "dress her " she's an adult and as such can dress herself.

I suggest you look for a Transgender club in your area, ask the members there for "help" if you REALLY can't dress yourself and for goodness sake LEARN to do your own laundry.
You have zero chance of a relationship with this co-worker and I'm wondering why she's the one you chose to tell.

Presh GG

[sarah_alexander]

You certainly have to be careful. I am currently dating...kinda...a girl who loves me dressed. She has me try stuff on till i'm tired...lol. Also, two coworkers I trust and consider close friends know. Just make sure you know them and trust them completely!

[sherri52]

First, Welcome to the forum. Your co-worker seems to want the role of big sister and turn you into her little man. If that's what you want then get yourself a nose ring so she can have something to pull. Lead your own life and as Presh has already mentioned, do your own laundry. Learn to stand up then you can walk, and don't trust everyone with your secret. The wrong person will spread the news to the world if they have a chance.

[Raine]

I had a friend in high school who wanted to dress me up. We were just friends but she thought I'd look cute in a dress. Back then I was coy and didn't take the offer despite much nagging, although I accepted the dance lessons. :)

I prefer being single, but if I did have a significant other, I'd prefer a woman that I can dress up rather than dress me up. I'm a tailor and dressmaker in the making after all.

There are plenty of women into crossdressers in the BDSM community, if anyone is into kinks. Don't expect to find a vanilla relationship though...

[Kate Simmons]

Not unless the relationship was forged in past life and then only if each partner is aware of who they were.:)

[tinalynn]

There's nothing like forcing a relationship based on wishful thinking! There are no intentions for your coworker to date you. She probably thinks your gay, which is why she likes having you around - your no threat. Seriously, you can't do your own laundry? Not even at a laundromat?

[Danielle76]

I once told someone. My ex fiance. I told her as if it was past tense, and something I just did at one point, which was a lie. I still, to this day, totally regret telling her. She wasn't judgemental or anything, but she wasn't happy about it either. I'm still friends with her, and it's many years later. It's weird for me knowing that she knows a bit of that part of my life, even if she doesn't suspect I still currently do it....

[gabimartini]

The part about the co-worker seems to be going in the wrong direction.

First, she needs to understand that you don't need "fixing" because you "ain't broken". Don't let her run your life for you! Do your own laundry, buy your own stuff, wear what you like!

Second, I don't see much chance for a relationship to develop, so if that's what you are expecting from her, be careful. Doesn't look like this is what she's offering. Don't be tricked into thinking that she will date you if she "fixes" you. She probably won't.

Take care of yourself and good luck!

[Amymonroe]

i have told a select few people. i have gotten to know them and have gotten an understanding about how they feel about tg and gay people in general. i have asked them in casual conversation and their response is how i judge on weather or not i tell them about me. my wife first told a close friend of hers, because when i first told her about it she needed someone to talk to. it just so happens that that particular person is supporetive and has passed some things down to me. but she does not want to see me dressed. any way what i am trying to say is you have to kinda "fish" around the subject with the people you want to tell to see what their reactions are before doing something hasty.

amy

[MargaretJ]

I think your being rather foolish. You may have some sort of expectation of how you hope this will pan out, but how do you know what will happen in the future? I notice you used the phrase co-worker, and not friend. Be carefull who you come out to, and that you can trust them to respect your feelings.

[mklinden2010]

>>Although we are closer with her now, there is no chance of us having a relationship since she is 28 and i'm 22 and there's no chance of her dressing me up... What a letdown


Well, welcome to the forum(s) and welcome, apparently, to the planet.

You already have a relationship with this woman. If you mean a "romantic" or "sexual" relationship, you may not be aware that foreplay comes in many shapes and sizes. Be careful, she may be more aware than you are...

("Not that there's anything wrong with that...")

Do, in any case, get your head out of, er, the clouds, and realize that YOUR sole focus on clothes and dressing up - with anyone willing to "help" you - is liable to get you trapped in some very sticky situations as you lead yourself into trouble following gum drops y-o-u throw onto the path ahead of you.

Life ain't all frills and bows. Some critters will eat you whole.


>>I was wondering if someone here managed to create a relationship with a woman where the woman herself would want her man to dress as a woman.

You apparently just got here. Look around and read the numerous affirmative posts that address your inquiry in various ways.

Realize, however, how sad and ultimately useless a relationship based on just this narrow interest would necessarily be.


>>I believe that the sex between a couple in such a relationship would be better than normal, can someone confirm this?


To more experienced adults, an involuntary cringe occurs each time such sentences are read. If that's what you currently believe, I'm not going to hold it against you. But, in time I hope you'll (also) realize that "better" and "normal" are not words you should use to speculate about sex with people or persons you (should) love for a variety of complex and caring reasons.

Sorry to sound like "Dear Abby" but you sound young and willing to explore the world. And, since you asked, I'll respect your efforts to do better - and even better than normal - by offering what fuddy-duddy experience I've gained since I started where you were many years ago.

Good luck to you then. May yours be a long and happy life.