Persephone
02-19-2010, 09:50 PM
I've always thought that there were 4 kinds of "encounters" that we could have with others.
I've posted about them on a few occasions, like in the thread Close encounters of the 4th kind (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=108463&) around May 1st of last year, they are:
1st kind - those who only know us as men.
2nd kind - those who only know us as women.
3rd kind - those who know us as both men and women.
4th kind - those who only know us as men but who somehow communicate with our inner woman automatically.
None of these are particularly likely to “out” us to others. Those in “kinds” 1 and 2 have nothing to talk about because they don’t know there is anything “unusual” about us.
The 3rd kind is mostly made up of close friends whom we have deliberately taken into our confidence, so unless our relationship with them changes, they aren’t likely to “out” us.
The 4th “kind” reacts to us largely unconsciously, so they don’t particularly think there is anything to talk about.
But today I’ve realized that there is a 5th kind. Those who have known us as men and who now see us as women and will probably tell someone about it.
The fifth kind is more likely made up of casual acquaintances, people at work who aren’t particularly close to us, neighbors we aren’t very friendly with, folks who wait on us in stores, etc.
Here’s how I came to this conclusion. I’ve sort of “transitioned” at the salon where I get my eyebrows done every month. No-one there, including my æsthetician, has commented on my having gone from “androgynous” to femme. But I’m still known there under my male name and I hadn’t really made a point of changing it there.
This morning, when I arrived wearing a sparkly turtleneck over femme pants, open-toes heels, full makeup, and with a “C” cup rather than an “A” or “AA,” everyone continued to be friendly, and everyone, without really thinking much about it, continued to greet me in my male name.
Needless to say, this probably left a few clients confused, at which point the stylist, manicurist, or æsthetician was likely to turn back to them and say, “He’s a guy.” Bingo, the staff are the “5th kind.”
Maybe something to think about as you plan your adventures.
I've posted about them on a few occasions, like in the thread Close encounters of the 4th kind (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=108463&) around May 1st of last year, they are:
1st kind - those who only know us as men.
2nd kind - those who only know us as women.
3rd kind - those who know us as both men and women.
4th kind - those who only know us as men but who somehow communicate with our inner woman automatically.
None of these are particularly likely to “out” us to others. Those in “kinds” 1 and 2 have nothing to talk about because they don’t know there is anything “unusual” about us.
The 3rd kind is mostly made up of close friends whom we have deliberately taken into our confidence, so unless our relationship with them changes, they aren’t likely to “out” us.
The 4th “kind” reacts to us largely unconsciously, so they don’t particularly think there is anything to talk about.
But today I’ve realized that there is a 5th kind. Those who have known us as men and who now see us as women and will probably tell someone about it.
The fifth kind is more likely made up of casual acquaintances, people at work who aren’t particularly close to us, neighbors we aren’t very friendly with, folks who wait on us in stores, etc.
Here’s how I came to this conclusion. I’ve sort of “transitioned” at the salon where I get my eyebrows done every month. No-one there, including my æsthetician, has commented on my having gone from “androgynous” to femme. But I’m still known there under my male name and I hadn’t really made a point of changing it there.
This morning, when I arrived wearing a sparkly turtleneck over femme pants, open-toes heels, full makeup, and with a “C” cup rather than an “A” or “AA,” everyone continued to be friendly, and everyone, without really thinking much about it, continued to greet me in my male name.
Needless to say, this probably left a few clients confused, at which point the stylist, manicurist, or æsthetician was likely to turn back to them and say, “He’s a guy.” Bingo, the staff are the “5th kind.”
Maybe something to think about as you plan your adventures.