Where's all these crossdressers at?

[Julie York]

Do you actually know one? In real life?

I want to be all understanding and "cool" when someone reveals themselves but I don't think I've even seen a CD in real life for years.

And yeah I know that the guy next door could be one etc etc etc. But then no-one knows about me either.

That's not my point.

Do you actually KNOW one? I think the secret handshake is so secret no-one knows it.

Clubbing devas are excluded from this question, naturally.

[Tristen Cox]

Personally I have meet a friend who was gay and did say he worn sundresses etc.. for his husband, but no real proof. We just had an understanding I guess. Otherwise no I have never meet anyone else.

[LaceLuvr]

so very true in 25 years i can only say i've ever met 1 guy who was a crossdresser that i know of for sure and even he was more of the club dragqueen type :)

[Wendy me]

yes i do i have met with and talked to them and some of them i have gone to lunch with and shopping with just regular normal people like us....and thats not to meachon the hours on the phone with crossdressers....thay are realy cool people .....

[suanne]

Hey babe...were here. Ok....sorry....I really don't know any except me.

Ya know I have seen a number of cd's around over the years and I have wanted to go up to each one and say. Hey...how you doin? I am a cd to. But I haven't, just guess I couldn't figure out what to really say. I know one thing every time I see someone dressed up I really want to dress myself. I remember one cd or ts who worked as a cashier at a local Wal Mart and she wore some make up and long nails and a few other things. I was buying some clothes (womens sizes) and made it a point to get into her check out line. When I checked out and smiled and said do you think I would look good in these wow! she shot me a look that would kill. So I just let it go. I don't know if my choice in clothes upset her or she thought I was making fun of her. I suppose the latter.

Now this may be a stupid question. But I have never went out in public dressed and couldn't pass if I had a bag on my head, :eek: but what would be a good approach to one that is dressed, for those of you who have been in that situation?

Hugs, Suanne :)

[Wendy me]

Hey babe...were here. Ok....sorry....I really don't know any except me.



Now this may be a stupid question. But I have never went out in public dressed and couldn't pass if I had a bag on my head, :eek: but what would be a good approach to one that is dressed, for those of you who have been in that sitituation?

Hugs, Suanne :)


well think your a cd right??? a outting by someone you don't know would put you on edge right??? how's abought hi how are you? or good morning or what ever time of the day it is....on one occasion that i walked out a cd not passing and in a not so freindy place as we parted i simply said nice shoes....
being read then assumed your "in" can be a frightful experence for a cd ,. so think how you might want saome one to react to you if you were read ....
sometimes we just assume wow a cd this cool and fail to think she is going omg i have been read.......

[suanne]

Ok, sorry I didn't explain myself very well. I did say hello and smiled and then made my comment about what I was buying. But there was no outing. The person had on mostly drab clothing. I though she was making a statement and I was wanting to support her. But I didn't do a good job of that. Now please let me off the hook. SORRY.

Hey do you work at Wal-Mart? :D Just kidding, Now don't get mad at me. :)

[Phoebe Reece]

Over they years I have met more CD's than I can count. If you want to see a living breathing CD, all you have to do is join a support group that meets within a reasonable distance from where you live and go to a meeting. Or, in the USA you can attend one of the annual national gatherings that don't require membership in anything, such as the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta in September.

As for CD's you may encounter that are out shopping, dining, or whatever, scaring them by approaching them is a possibility - but not a certainty. I have had people approach me (and other CD's that I have been with) in stores and restaurants and ask what was going on. It doesn't frighten me. In fact, I greet them with a smile and use that as an opportunity to explain to them about crossdressing. Passing is nice, but acceptance is a much more practical goal.

[Laurie Ann]

Other than on this site I, to my knowledge, have not met anothed CD. I would love to find one and have the opportunity to have a girl's night.

[Brittney M]

I know a lot of CDers. but I also belong to a support group that meets once a month. It took me a long time to actually go to one and now I don't want to miss them.

[kysmet]

I have known many over the years through the support group. At one time our numbers were in the mid 30's for membership. That number went even higher when we started having luncheons with the local Tri-Ess group. People have traveled from other countries to attend some of our meetings.

Ericka Jean

[uknowhoo]

Nope (not that I know of)
Tho I hope to get to a Tri-Ess or similar meeting one of these months.

[Donna Delite]

Sure, I know some cd's besides myself, we're out there.

[StephanieCD]

I've had the same question myself, hun. I think back to a time I've talked about on here before. For a while in my more drug affected days, there was a group of guys that partied with myself and a GG friend/ex of mine. She encouraged us to wear those indian floor length skirts - you know the pretty batik ones? Anyway, there were a good 6 or 7 guys who did it and a couple seemed really, really at home if you know what I mean.

Other than the one true TS I've known - that's all I've confirmed. I did meet one from here - met Rayna once. And I haven't met Tristen yet ;)

But who's counting? LOL

[emmicd]

Most cd'ers prefer to remain anonymous and live in closet as they tend to have families, jobs and major responsibilites. They do it for various reasons but more as stress reliever and just cause it feels good.

If you look hard enough you would find cds/tgs at some clubs that are appropriate for them. I've seen on occasion some cd'ers in NYC.

They fit in just like everyone else!

Emmi

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

Well the best way to get to know some other CDs is to get out to a meeting of a T-groups, like Tri-Ess or equivalent.

I've met a several dozen girls face-to-face that way. Granted there's a lot more of us out in the Bay Area, but I'm on various forums and surprised to see the number of T-girls getting together in places around the country where I wouldn't have expected it.

Don't know what's in the UK, but you might try contacting the Beaumont Society (http://www.beaumontsociety.org.uk/) to see if there's any group or gathering place near you. There's a T-group in Manchester (http://www.northernconcord.org.uk/) in case that's near you.

Another alternative would be to attend one of the various T-conferences. I'm sure there's got to be some in the UK. And if you ever get down to London, I know there's a sizable CD scene there.

[Jen_TGCD]

Key word>>> TG Support Groups !!!

[Ya... I know. It was three words! :rolleyes: ]

Julie... get your plaid clad fanny out the door and find a Support Group!!! :thumbsup: :D

[maryannsung]

Wait a minute. This is a crossdressers' forum. Why would you ask such a question? Go out and meet some other sisters.

[Mitzi]

I've posted this in another thread (or two). If you're in the San Jose area, drop by Carla's. Her shop/boutique is strictly for CD/TS's. You're likely to meet other CD's there, some just as nervous as you. You can go drab and dress there (or not), or go en femme. You can then say you've met other CD's!

Mitzi

[JoannaDees]

Yes, I know a couple of them. I'm sure they are on this forum and near you, just meet 'em.

[Abraxas]

Oh my God, I know TONS of them. Err, I've seen tons of them. When I was going out with Dianne (a transsexual, for those of you who don't know the whole bit), she introduced me to some of her friends... Took me to a bar and there were at least fifty CDs/ TVs/ TGs/ TSs there. Not kidding. And this is UTAH.
I've hung out with a few of her friends, who I can say I know personally (4 besides her, although I believe 2 (if not 3) of them were TS).

[Claire B]

Oh my, I have tried to find out if there were any crossdressers up here in my neck of the woods. For I would like to meet with another special lady like myself. But so far I have ran into a dead end. So I must say that no, I do not know any crossdressers in person. Just all of you ladies here on the forum.

Hugs Claire

[Abraxas]

Now... if anyone knows where to find other FTMs around me, we'll be in business! ;)

[Emily Ann Brown]

We're out there.....I have had lunch with a couple locally. Fun having lunch and discussing the ladies going by...well actually what the ladies going by are wearing. Sat next to one recently on a plane flight but did not try to strike up a friendship. She looked uneasy enough just having to sit next to me. When we landed I got her carryon out of the compartment and said "here you go mam." She smiled ear to ear.

Isn't the idea that we wouldn't see them because they blend in ????


Emily Ann

[Wendy me]

Ok, sorry I didn't explain myself very well. I did say hello and smiled and then made my comment about what I was buying. But there was no outing. The person had on mostly drab clothing. I though she was making a statement and I was wanting to support her. But I didn't do a good job of that. Now please let me off the hook. SORRY.

Hey do you work at Wal-Mart? :D Just kidding, Now don't get mad at me. :)


girlfreind i did not mean for you to be felt like you were on the hook .... not what i was saying at all sorry that you thought it that way...simply what i was saying is we have to walk on eggshells sometimes to not upset someone and what we thought ment one way was taken quite diffrent ....just look at my frist replay....see??? see i never ment you to be defencfull or think i was getting on you ...so you never know what the person before you said to her ....huge wendy hugs.....

[carson]

Do you actually know one? In real life?

I want to be all understanding and "cool" when someone reveals themselves but I don't think I've even seen a CD in real life for years.

And yeah I know that the guy next door could be one etc etc etc. But then no-one knows about me either.

That's not my point.

Do you actually KNOW one? I think the secret handshake is so secret no-one knows it.

Clubbing devas are excluded from this question, naturally.

I don't know if my answer will help because it depends on the purpose of your question. Are you trying to verify that CD's really do exist in the "real world" b/c by seeing if any of the forum members actually know one personally outside of this cyberworld? Or are you just, as a CD, feeling a bit isolated and looking for reassurance that this "thing we do" extends beyond our little online club?

Well darlin', drag queens excepted, I can't honestly say that I've met another crossdresser as I think you are describing. As someone else implied, not too many people are willing to be outed and if I did meet or "made" one in public somewhere, I don't think I would even have the temerity to let them know I knew by saying something subtle like, "I like your shoes." Their private business is their own and even if we're "sisters," I wouldn't want another CD making me in public either.

However, if even with the support of this forum you find yourself wondering if there really are CD's out there besides yourself (I've done this from time to time) let me tell you about the non-personal interaction I've had with crossdressers. Years ago my first wife and I used to live in Charleston, SC. Occassionally we would go clubbing b/c she loves to dance. One club in particular that had good dance music was called The Treehouse and it was a CD/TV club. And this place was not just for "clubbing divas" as you put it. Going there was singnificant for me b/c I was so deeply in the closet yet yearned to be able to go out in public en femme. My wife and I would sit at the bar between dances (I'm in drab of course!) and people watch. We would see CD's of all shapes and sizes, casually mingling and having a great time - often with their female SO's. It was the first time that I ever saw crossdressers and particularly some really HOT looking CD's! Oh how I yearned to be out there with them! So yes, I may not have personally met any CD's, but I have certainly rubbed shoulders (or shoulder pads!) with them. :)

[Katie Ashe]

I only can think of one... I work with a girl whom is FTM. But it took us almost a month to figure it out there sex. She doesn't talk, short asian person, total guy image. Even used the uni-sex bathrooms all the time.. no-one had the courage to ask. We found out her name is fem. I'm leaving this at that for privacy reasons.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

I've posted this in another thread (or two). If you're in the San Jose area, drop by Carla's.Mitzi

I'll second Carla's, she's a real sweetie, and also organizes monthly dinners. We had about 20 people last time. For those who are shy, I Love It Girl in Fremont offers weekly dress-up nights in privacy (you can change on-site).

[Maude]

Do you actually know one? In real life?

I want to be all understanding and "cool" when someone reveals themselves but I don't think I've even seen a CD in real life for years.

And yeah I know that the guy next door could be one etc etc etc. But then no-one knows about me either.

That's not my point.

Do you actually KNOW one? I think the secret handshake is so secret no-one knows it.

Clubbing devas are excluded from this question, naturally.

I have trouble finding someone in my state let alone close by ?
So i am going to travel to meet with someone that invited me to visit them.
I am sure there will be frightful pictures !
Will get back to you..
maude

[DebbieThomas]

Oh my, I have tried to find out if there were any crossdressers up here in my neck of the woods. For I would like to meet with another special lady like myself. But so far I have ran into a dead end. So I must say that no, I do not know any crossdressers in person. Just all of you ladies here on the forum.

Hugs Claire

Hi Claire
Triess has two chapters in IL
Chicago, IL Metro Area
http://www.chi-triess.org/
Champaign, IL Area
http://www.cui-triess.org
wont say anything else dont want to kill this thread

[MistyCD]

Does meeting a CD'er at a pre arranged meeting count? If so, then the answer is yes! I belong to a crossdressers group on Yahoo called Crossdressers in NJ and have been chatting with this other person for about a year now. We finally met at a gay bar in New Hope Pennsylvania. The other CD lives by New York City and suggested we meet there as New Hope or parts of it are known as a gay hangout. (my apologies to any gays or lesbians if my terminology is wrong),but the people there are more open to different ideas.

Maybe we should get business cards printed using our word processing programs that have this site or another on it with our names/handles on it.
One could say "excuse me, but I believe you dropped this" and hand the card to them.

the card could say www.crossdressers.com member name MistyCD
all are welcome

This way, we could introduce ourselves politely as CD'ers and not put the other person on the spot. :)

[Julie York]

Nice idea Misty. Actually that is a very good idea. Thing is...I don't want to meet anyone as such...not like...."I am a CD let's meet." I have NO interest in that. I was just curious about the fact that unless you are in clubland, then it is pretty much totally hidden and you might know someone unwittingly who is CD but not really KNOW. And if you did come across someone and wanted to show support then what do you do? Apart from call them 'Miss' or something not really honest when you know it isn't a Miss, because you Know that they Know that etc etc..

The thing is, it would be cool to have some sort of way of saying "yeah good for you" without scaring the hell out of someone. But, as this thread has shown, the chances of coming across a CD /Tg in normal life, and knowing it, are so slim it doesn't really matter.

It's a strange contradiction. A Catch 22. If you see a CD/TG then you have to NOT recognise them to be polite. Or it would be impolite. So you have to pretend that they are a woman and ignore them. So you can't even nod and wink or then they'd get paranoid etc etc.

I think "nice shoes" should become a recognised secret handshake.

[Wendy me]

works for me girlfreind ...nice shoes.............. i like it.........

[MichelleGray502]

I have known quite a few cd's over 'th last 20 years or so either meeting them in clubs or somehow for some reason i can always seem read them on 'th street when they either walk pass me or i walk pass them. everytime i ever come across any dosn't matter if they pass or not i have always given my full support and sometimes try to be helpful in anyway i could possibly be at 'th time.

Since i married i haven't met to many new ones due to 'th fact i dont get much out these days but i still keep in touch with a few that i have known for years evry now and then due to busy schedules that we now lead in our lives we only get together when we can. i would to meet some new girls again one day when me and 'th wife can do it.

Since i have joined this forum i have already met some great people and hopefully be able to meet them in person some day. it has been one of 'th best things that i have done in my cd'ng life.

[CharleneCD]

Bunny and I are pretty sure we met our first crossdresser just being out, and not at a CD function or through a site. He was our waiter tonight at dinner. We were unsure at first that he might be an efeminant gay but the watch gave it away. It was definitely a girl watch with heart links for the band. We couldnt say anything to him/her because this was at her job but I am sure that my fingernails and earings were noticed as we got a lot of smiles through dinner and we got a lot of atention.

[Angela Burke]

Never met another CD?

You have, many times, many many times!

Love Angela XX

[Toni]

Hi Julie,

Until January this year I had never met another TV, TG, Gay or Lesbian when through a stroke of good luck more than good judgment I began to attend a social evening for TV's once a week. I have to say that this meeting is the highlight of my week when I can talk and be myself for just a few hours among other like minded people (My wife goes with me and she enjoys it too). So I can say that I have met dozens of TV's and the vast majority are funny and full of life and just like me like to wear a dress. Being with other TV's has made me more confident and happy and totally settled with my lot as my wife would confirm.

[Anita]

julie if you recollect a month or so ago you were invited to join a meet of cd's in the york area Which ,incidentally, never materialised but you opted out when asked to join So if you won't participate unless the postman knocks on the door in the morning and says "sign for this and oh I am a crossdresser you ain't giving it chabnce hun
Sorry to be so brutal but

[Stephanie Mancini]

I know lots of girls and regularly meet up with quite a few every month and go out as often as i can with some of them to various functions , sharing the mirror with a few other girls is always a nice experience


Steph

[Anita]

Steph You got it and I quote you "regularly meet up"
They dont knock on your door and say excuse me there is a meeting ofCD's next week woukld you like to come? lol

[Wendy me]

wow anita playing nice your not....or is this your.......?????

[Anita]

wendy just stating fact hun just stating fact
not being malicious etc but lets be truthful eh hun? xx

[Wendy me]

yes thats all right and fine girlfreind thats a mighty big spoon you got there.....

[Tristen Cox]

Ladies! You're bickering like a bunch of girls! Oh yeah:p carry on.. :D

[Anita]

wendy If someone posts" I ain't met a gay guy "and sits at home the chances are pretty remote they never will Agreed?So "I don't see other CD's" and "I sit at home dressed but do notvisit "for example Manchester or local cd groups why ask the question?
I have never seen a drag queen but then again I have never been to drag show ! Get my meaning?

[Wendy me]

Ladies! You're bickering like a bunch of girls! Oh yeah:p carry on.. :D
well truth be told .....well it set my heels to a smoken ....truth be told ....wow belive that for what it's worth glass house and all ......errrrrrrrrrrr...ok mutch better now....but better than what?????

[Shaylynn]

I do plan to go out and meet some other girls. There are so many things to do, have alot of shopping to do, right all I have is some sexy lingerie and some babydoll nighties. I also need help with my makeup. If any of you girls can suggest a good Cd Salon in NYC please let me know. My goal is to go out en femme by Halloween.
hugs
Shaylynn

[Anita]

Tristen I am not bickering or trying to be destructive On the contrary I am trying to be consrtuctive
Its like saying Bananas taste foul .ever tried one ...no

[Tristen Cox]

I was KIDDING. I know what you meant:)

[Wendy me]

wendy If someone posts" I ain't met a gay guy "and sits at home the chances are pretty remote they never will Agreed?So "I don't see other CD's" and "I sit at home dressed but do notvisit "for example Manchester or local cd groups why ask the question?
I have never seen a drag queen but then again I have never been to drag show ! Get my meaning?


i can see your meaning for shure , true enough but if you make a point then enough true some people can't see what thay are haveing right in frought of their nose....like some one who asks a question then lights hell fire under anyone trying to helpe lest we ever forget.... some stay in the house and don't see a thing sad but true then those that go for a walk in the big open world that miss the whole point ...thats all i am saying....

[Anita]

Lol Tristen at least you appreciate if you post a question you cannot expect everybody to get out a handkerchief and sob and agree with you This ,in my opinion, is what debate is all about
Some will agree some will argue but if you cannot stand the heat don't go in the bloody kitchen!
This site is for friendly banter not sod you how dare you not agree with my posting types
In my opinion a lot of people have left because of this if you diasagree with my posting you are a trouble maker attitude
If i post a thread and someone disagrees with my podting and openly says so Briliant Thats what its all about in my opinion
But cry babies leave me cold
Well thats my two bobs worth No doubt I will be reprimanded etc but eh lets be adults Life is a bitch and then you die :)

[Deidra Cowen]

Clubbing devas are excluded from this question, naturally.

Thats me! :eek: <<<<this lowly deva peeks thru the thread then sneaks out before I am caught!>>>>

[Anita]

Wendy YesI lit that fire and apologised for it forgoten OK?

[Wendy me]

Wendy YesI lit that fire and apologised for it forgoten OK?


thats what i am talking abought apologiesed and forgoten ok shure thats what we do here ... look i like to think we are freinds right?? i would most hope so....julie is also a freind thats for shure ... look when we get on that i will show you a thing or two...thats how things start off to be a forum war b.s. i have seen way too mutch of this trivel b.s. so look we all need to be a little more thought full of our sisters ....some just can't bare to walk out the door never mind mix it up with cd's danceing the night away ...to each's comfet zone we must respect as we wish ours wached and respected too...

damage controll after the fact is not the answer but respect and thought fullness before saves the trouble.....this is my home you all are my sisters together we are family ....lets think this way .....

[Anita]

Wendy Sorry but I think you miss the point post a thread but do not expect everybody to agree
It seems to me if you if one posts a reply and it is not agreeing with the poster one is a trouble causer
I like Julie but I disagre with the thread so Ii say so
Do you want me to lie and post what I do not feel?
Lets get real Ask a question /post and accept that not everybody thinks oh I must agree and grovel
That is where this site is going wrong in my opinion just like us Brits have

Say what you mean not what peoplewant to hear and if it causes a problem
dont ask the question/post in the firt place
I will answer what I feel and believe to be true If that offends so be it NBut I will not bum lick to be a nice person

[Anita]

Well i think i wont botherWill watch site but post nothing

[Wendy me]

your bum licking not requried yuck thanks for the pitcure....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do you actually know one? In real life? harmless question

I want to be all understanding and "cool" when someone reveals themselves but I don't think I've even seen a CD in real life for years. being ready to meat some one harmless
And yeah I know that the guy next door could be one etc etc etc. But then no-one knows about me either. truth nouthing abought going out looking or the lack of..That's not my point.

Do you actually KNOW one? I think the secret handshake is so secret no-one knows it.there again harmless questions ....

Clubbing devas are excluded from this question, naturally.
__________________
"I need your panties and yoor motoh cickle".
julie if you recollect a month or so ago you were invited to join a meet of cd's in the york area Which ,incidentally, never materialised but you opted out when asked to join So if you won't participate unless the postman knocks on the door in the morning and says "sign for this and oh I am a crossdresser you ain't giving it chabnce hun
Sorry to be so brutal but


was that a responce to the question ????or more a mixing of the pot???
truth fuly now don't uou just like that whole argueing crap , i am leveing oh txxxxxx your so good to realy english thing then we would see all the girls from over the puddle doing this realy some just like to through stones....then find what ever is todays flavor to blame it for ...me i say b.s. blame the stone throughing on the stone ...whilest the stone througher walks away blameless i think not.....

[Anita]

wendy not a problem will watch in future and not post
54321 i am gone Site is dead without respecting other s views :(

[MistyCD]

.

I think "nice shoes" should become a recognised secret handshake.[/QUOTE]

sounds good, but maybe we should add the following.....

Nice shoes....I have a pair like them in RED !

If you say this in a hushed voice, not laughing or smiling, the
this could open a conversation with the other person,
1. It lets them know that you are not making fun of them
2. It lets them know that you are possibly a CD as well
and it might put them at ease..... plus it may also let them know
they are not the only one out there and you may become friends


what do u think

Hugs Misty :) :thumbsup:

[Wendy me]

wendy not a problem will watch in future and not post
54321 i am gone Site is dead without respecting other s views :(

all too often the cry of wolf rings clear , shall we take a trip in time girlfreind
i am more than shure we done heard that before....oh i wont ...this site is dead to me... trust me we will not too long from now ecco the same words
the playground days are over ........sorry done full up with this ....my $1.98...

[Anita]

wendy your response says it all I rest my case

[Stephanie Mancini]

Steph You got it and I quote you "regularly meet up"
They dont knock on your door and say excuse me there is a meeting ofCD's next week woukld you like to come? lol

Anita your wrong, they do knock on my door and tell me and guess what i usually go along to the meetings


Steph

[Anita]

Steph \luckyyou all i get is Jehovas witnesses lol

[Julie York]

I missed all the fun here.
I didn't see what anita wrote before deleting so can't respond accordingly. So no idea what all that was about.



My point was not about wanting to meet CDs. I am not looking to meet anyone. They are all raging perverts who prance about in womens clothing after all. :D


It was about how rare it is to KNOW one in real life and if you did come across one how you could respond in a polite way without scaring the hell out of them.


(Damn I always miss the fun.)

[Sweet Jeanette]

Yeah, I know one. She drives all over town in her red teddy, fishnet hose, black pumps, with her black beard, and rag on her head, on her Harley! We pulled up to a stoplight one day, and she pulled up. I saw this, and gave her a "Thumbsup"! ---Then she pulled in to a store to pay her utility bills ! ---Yeah! ---I know one! :D

[Sweet Susan]

I know several. But I will admit that I met them all in cd social clubs.