I can’t go out dressed like that!

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I was just reviewing an e-mail with pictures of people while they were at Wal-Mart. I’m sure some of you have seen these e-mails. These people wear clothes that the average person would say “I can’t go out dressed like that.” It’s obvious that these people didn’t say “I can’t go out dressed like that.” They did their own thing & that’s OK (as long as it doesn’t break the law – and I think some were).



That got me thinking. So many of us are fearful to go out wearing the clothes we would like to wear. We have all kinds of reasons and fears. We say, “What if they laugh at me?” or “What if they know I’m a guy in a skirt?”, “I want to pass but I can’t.” etcetera. But we are entitled to dress the way we wish and present the way we want (once again – within the limits of the law).



If you want to go out dressed but are fearful of what people will say, I say don’t worry. After all the things they’ve seen at Wal-Mart (and other retail places), one crossdresser is no big deal.


We CAN go out dressed like that!

Clarification

I just want to clarify. This thread is NOT about Wal-Mart or trying to degrade, make fun of, etc. those people in the pictures. The point of the tread is to say, Other people are not afraid to go out dressed as they wish and we should not be afraid to either.

[StaceyJane]

You are so right, that's why I went to Walmart Sunday night dressed en femme. I had the best time. I couldn't believe that I was actually walking around the store as Stacey.

Nobody said anything bad to me and after a glance everyone went back to their business.

Now I can't wait to do it again. Maybe a little earlier than 1:30 next time.

Check out the first youtube video in my signature to see how things went on my trip.

[wishing2bali]

You pose a very valid point miss!

[Alexei]

If these people can be comfortable with the way they look, then so can I.

[TxKimberly]

It used to scare the hell outta me but I'm over that now . . .

[Kiera79]

I went out today and with a member of the site at a cracker barrel ate dinner and had good conversation. After that went back to my home city and went to fed ex kinko's to copy some docs and send a fax. Finally went to a local Wal-Mart and purchased my bath salts. Got a few looks all day and a snicker from someone bitost people were accepting and didn't say or look at me in a foul way. I was in some form fitting jeans, a nice femme blue shirt, and my heels. Felt absoutely awesome. If you don't care what people think it won't matter. Just have fun and be safe.

[Midnight Skye]

I've been to Walmart in a number of different outfits... a few where "what the #$!! was I thinking". My favorite number was black tights, a cute purple long sleeve top, a flowing black skirt, and my 5-6 inch suede boots. The boots were overkill. No one said anything mean... I actually got three nice comments of woman who loved my boots. But I attracted WAY too much attention. :o I apparently wasn't entirely blending as "female" dressed like that.

The funniest part were the children... whether in drab or dressed children love me. But in those boots children would spot me and start following me around the store. I'm NOT joking. I had one little girl leave the side of her mom/sister and wander around the isle to follow me. She just kept watching me so very bubbly as I shopped for some bread. Seeing that she was oh so curious, I said hi to her. She said hi back and kept watching my boots (sighs). I had another pair of children follow me around three or four isles before they finally stopped me so they could ask about my boots... if I had just come from church... my name. They finally scurried off as I headed to the other end of the store.

It was a crazy walmart trip :daydreaming:

[christinek]

Yeah I have done the Wal-Mart thing. Actually went there the very first time out in Fem. Its no big deal depending what part the country or world you live. In Atlanta GA no one even cares, in parts of Alabama you are taking your life into your own hands.

[kimdl93]

its a really good point. I'm incredibly self conscious...but when I think of how some people dress & look...not CDs, but the other folk...maybe I ain't so bad!

[Cindi Johnson]

Yes, we are entitled to dress as we choose. And as to the "law", it wasn't that long ago when the law in most cities and states denied us this entitlement. Unfortunately, the law in this country is made by mostly old, white, wealthy, very conservative males. (What? You thought the law was handed down from above, inscribed on stone?) It is our right, our responsibility, to challenge bad laws.

Are we subjected to mistreatment when out en femme? Well, I know I'm actually treated much better when I'm out dressed as a woman than when I'm dressed as a male.

Going out dressed used to be exhilarating; now, after years of it, it has become my avenue to Nirvana. When dressed, I'm at peace.

Cindi Johnson

[Anita Lynn]

Check out the first youtube video in my signature to see how things went on my trip.

I watched the video and I gotta say... love the perspective, the way you put it all together!
but c'mon, cute blouses at walmart:believeit:?! Girl we gotta get you to Ross, or TJ Max, or anywhere else!:devil:

seriously, it was a good video.

Melissa Ann

[jenifer m.]

cant say ive done walmart,but ive done k mart during the day in full femme.i used my blond curly wig white blouse,a jean jacket,a denim kneelength skirt,pantyhose,some pink ballet flats,apink purse,nails done makeup the whole nine.never got read once.even tried shoes on while there.what fun.

[Veronica Nowakowski]

I've been to WalMart once, and not by choice. You could feel the dark energy radiating off of it. Made me literally nauseated. But it is a kick being out in public.

[Michelle-Leigh]

Yeah, just wear a pretty dress or blouse+skirt with some hose and pretty shoes ! And enjoy seeing your reflection walking toward you in the store windows......

[Sarah Doepner]

Back in November there was a "crossdresser day" announcement that was being circulated on Facebook. I posted that I went to the local Wally World crossdressed and no one paid any attention. I said I went with little makeup and wore printed cotton pajama bottoms, flip-flops, an oversize sweatshirt with a Disney character on it and had my hair pulled back thru the opening on the back of my ball cap.

A couple of folks commented and laughed about it, BUT OMG & REALLY, no one should go out dressed like that in a public place. If nothing else we crossdressers tend to raise the bar on what is acceptable in women's fashions.

[sissystephanie]

Those who have my read some of my posts know that I go out frequently as a guy, but dressed totally enfemme! One of my frequent shopping places when dressed enfemme in Walmart! I am not always buying feminine things, but when I do the clerks almost always tell me that they think it will look good on me. They know that I am a widower, and live alone so the clothes are for me! I go everywhere wearing skirts and tops, or sometimes a dress, and never have any problems. Of course, since I am presenting as a man, I use the mens restroom when it is necessary!

[msginaadoll]

You definitely have a point Kim. I do believe however in dressing within certain standards of the place Im going to. You will not find me in a miniskirt and 5 inch heels wandering through wallmart or at the mall. I save that for the club. Its funny you hear of people going to various places and saying people looked at them, etc. Then you hear what they wore and in your head you say "No wonder." Or maybe its just me being judgemental.

[Josie Angel]

Thanks, Kim. This gives me some perspective. Very encouraging.

Cindi, I love it. "When I am dressed, I am at peace" is now my new affirmation.

[Karen7cd]

As I walk up to Wal-mart, I check out my walk. Is it fem enough? Are my shoulder back,
hip a little forward, are my hips moving like a woman, did I pad them just right?, not walking like a hooker??
Once in the store, I'm straight to the make-up isle. I put a few things in my cart.
Walking with a cart seems to help me maintain my walk. I can not help but check out a few bras, and the clearance racks. Last time as I checked out I found a lane with no one waiting. The cashier was great. I had passed, till I started talking. She was so cool. With no one behind me we talked makeup, tatooes, (she had several).

[Holly]

I still can't believe some people here think it is okay to judge others based on what they are wearing. The word "hypocrite" comes to mind. **Walks away shaking head**

[Melinda G]

I'll watch for you all on the "People of Wal-Mart" site.:D

[VeronicaMoonlit]

I still can't believe some people here think it is okay to judge others based on what they are wearing. The word "hypocrite" comes to mind.

People do it all the time. Don't you watch the Style Network? WNTW on TLC? The late lamented "Queer Eye" shows? The People of Wal Mart site is just an internet expression of that.

It's also not hypocritical at all, judging someone on their style is different than judging someone on being openly TG. There's a difference between someone saying:

"What trannies do is sick!"

and

"That tranny has no style."

Veronica Rogers

[DonniDarkness]

here here veronica!! wise perspective

[Cheryl T]

Well, if you compare any of us out at Walmart or anywhere for that matter to some of the people that dare to go out...WHAT ARE WE AFRAID OF???

Would you rather be seen in a nice skirt and top or...like THIS...

[JustWendy]

Cheryl - you're a Jersey Girl - you know it's almost dinner time - how am I suppose to eat after seeing this? Hmmm, the People of WalMart diet - I'll be back in that size 12 in no time :daydreaming:. On second thought, thanks, Cheryl.
Hugs, Wendy

[ReineD]

I've just spent a little time trying to find a common thread to the Walmart people pics. Some of the pics are humorous or optical illusions. There was a pic of the back of a young woman who had her knee-length hair tied into pony tail, under her hoodie, making it look like she had a tail. There were other pics of fantastic looking mowhawks, or t-shirts that have humorous things on them.

These pics are not disparaging to people.

The pics I don't like are the ones making fun of people who may not have the financial resources to look like the latest fashion plate, even though they are neat in appearance. Or maybe some people are going to a masquerade party. Who's to day some of the more outlandish outfits are not costumes yet out of context, the people are made to look weird?

But many of the pics are gross. There are people with butt cracks showing, love handles spilling out all over the place, ultra mini skirts to the point where you wonder if the person has any genitals, lol, or people who could wear clothing in appropriate sizes, but choose to wear items that are several sizes too small and leave nothing to the imagination.

The CDs seem to be targeted, but not the ones who dress conventionally or demurely. I saw middle-aged CDs with middle-school aged sparkly tops showing bare midriffs and wearing 6 inch heels, CDs weighing several hundred lbs with pink tutus, and more than a fair share of CDs with outlandish makeup or again clothing that is way too tight and is more appropriate for a nightclub.

Even if a gorgeous GG were to show up at Walmart in a bikini, a wedding gown, a miniskirt up to her navel, or a negligee, her pic would be included simply because the style of dress is unconventional for the setting, or for that matter, inappropriate unless she was at the beach, a wedding, a nightclub, or in bed.

I suppose a case could be made to have everyone in our society dress creatively strictly according to how they feel, but then there wouldn't be any fashion trends, which like or not, do establish norms.

So I wouldn't use the Walmart people pics as a discouragement against going out en femme provided (unless you don't care what impression you make), you follow the same general guidelines as the rest of the population and keep the tutus at home. :)

[Kim_Bitzflick]

I guess it is all a matter of opinion. But we can't just do things because that's what the general population establishes as the norms. If people did things just to fit in and NO ONE stepped out to be different then we'd still be dressed like cave dwellers.

We need to be different, but MYdifferent is different from your different.

[Holly]

People do it all the time.People murder all the time, too. Doesn't make it right.
Don't you watch the Style Network? WNTW on TLC? The late lamented "Queer Eye" shows? The People of Wal Mart site is just an internet expression of that.No, I don't. I also don't watch American Idol for the same reason. Laughing at someone else's expense is at best a cheap laugh and at worst shows some people can only feel good about themselves by demeaning and ridiculing others.
It's also not hypocritical at all, judging someone on their style is different than judging someone on being openly TG. There's a difference between someone saying:

"What trannies do is sick!"

and

"That tranny has no style."

Veronica RogersAnd yet we constantly decry the fact that we cannot wear skirts and dresses and makeup without incurring the wrath of society. If you want acceptance, you better be prepared to accept others who are different from you. Not doing so IS the definition of hypocrisy.

[Alice Torn]

Maybe Walmart should try having a monthly costume day!!

[ReineD]

If people did things just to fit in and NO ONE stepped out to be different then we'd still be dressed like cave dwellers.

Kim, I don't know if your comment was addressed to me or not, since it was immediately below mine, but I am saying that people shouldn't be scared to go out dressed just because there are sites with pics of Walmart people that are on the extreme ends of the bell curve.

There is a very wide range to normal. I believe CDs are "normal", but anyone showing up at Walmart or any other non clubby place attired like the people in the pics I've described will get stared at. Middle-aged people in sparklies and tutus, or scantily clad, or with their clothes half falling off and showing body parts the rest of us would rather not see will get stared at. It is human nature.

A woman dressed in a sterotypical streetwalker outfit would get stared at in the grocery store. A business man wearing his PJs to work would get stared at too.

My point was, judging by the pics in the gallery on this site, that CDs here to not have to worry about falling outside of "normal".

EDIT
Just to be clear, here is an example of my point. This woman could just as easily have worn something that covers her butt-crack.

109186

[Kim_Bitzflick]

Kim, I don't know if your comment was addressed to me or

Not aimed at you. I agree that the woman in the pic should wear something to cover the crack.

My point of this thread was to let people know that we should not feel scared, ashamed, or whatever about going out dressed like we wish (within the limits of the law). But then again, in some places it still is against the law for men to dress as women.:sad:

[cdsara88]

I'd really like to know, what's the deal with going to f-ing wal-mart? I'm happy to live in a place where we have a pretty equal mix of yuppy retail and walmart down the street, and if I saw a CD at wal-mart (which I wouldnt, because i dont go there), you better BELIEVE I'd be telling him/her that (s)he's setting his/her sights too low.

Let me say it again. Don't get dressed and go to wal-mart. you deserve better than the bull$hit judgement of SOMEONE ELSE shopping at wal-mart at 1am. they're just there to see the crossdressers anyway*.

*or take ridiculous pics to post on FB/myspace/etc. which most stores have a policy against.

**but i've done anyway.

[PretzelGirl]

Ho-boy! So now we are going to be elitists? How many here actually believe that the people in these pictures only go to Walmart? If I start taking pictures of people dressing the way they want at the library, will you stop going there? The post office? What about every grocery store going (you will sure get hungry)? BTW, I get a lot of my groceries at Walmart.

I am with Holly. We are always looking for acceptance for our appearance yet we are going to sit here and judge people for there appearance? If you don't care for the way they look, don't stare, laugh, and ridicule them. Just move on.

[ReineD]

Honestly, I don't think the OP was making fun of anyone. Rather she was worried that people might make fun of her or other CDs when they go out, which is a common concern whether there are Walmart People sites or not.

The Walmart People thing has become viral and IMO it is no longer representative of Walmart as much as mainstream places in general where people go out half dressed showing body parts that most of us would rather not see.

Maybe some viewers on the internet look at the issue as a 'privileged class' thing and some may even laugh at anyone who looks different (I expect that young people are mostly leaving the derogatory comments on the pic sites .. Angel Marie had a similar experience with some young people recently), but I did not get the impression from the posters in this thread that they think they are better than anyone else.

:2c:

[VeronicaMoonlit]

People murder all the time, too. Doesn't make it right.

I personally don't consider being told I should wear 3/4 sleeves, scoop necklines and find wrap tops and dresses to be morally equivalent to murder.


Laughing at someone else's expense is at best a cheap laugh and at worst shows some people can only feel good about themselves by demeaning and ridiculing others.

I don't watch those shows to laugh at people, but to see what suggestions are made to the person involved ant to get ideas.


And yet we constantly decry the fact that we cannot wear skirts and dresses and makeup without incurring the wrath of society.

Who is this "we"? Now I admit there is a segment of crossdressers.com that does so, especially among the older and more conservative crowd, but not the majority. There's plenty of folks, including CD's, who go out a lot and don't encounter any wrath.


If you want acceptance, you better be prepared to accept others who are different from you. Not doing so IS the definition of hypocrisy.

It's quite easy to accept and respect someone, and still think they're a fashion victim.

Veronica Rogers

[minalost]

It's quite easy to accept and respect someone, and still think they're a fashion victim.
Veronica Rogers

Smartest thing said in this thread!
:hugs: