Am I being too sensitive?

[pamela_a]

After all, it's just a word but I have serious problems with the word Tranny. Being alone for the first time in nearly 30 years is starting to get to me so I've been looking at several TS dating sights but I just can't seem to get past their use of the word Tranny. I'll get most of the way through the registration then somewhere along the way that word will pop up and I'll stop where I am and close the page.

Maybe I'm just using it as an excuse. In all honesty, the idea of dating again scares me to death. I was never very good at dating 30 years ago but now it's worse, especially starting to date as a woman now, and I'm using that as an excuse.

[Hope]

I know how you feel. Not a fan. It has definitely been used as a pejorative and as a term of disrespect.

On the other hand, I don't mind it at all when I hear another girl use it. I'm starting to think of it like "N166er" or "fag" or some of the other words that have been used to demean a group of people but have been reclaimed by that group and can be freely used by that group in self reference.

But what the hell do I know?

Whatever the case - if you are using an excuse to do something that is going to make you happy - knock that off. But here is an important question - is a TS dating site going to make you happy?

[GypsyKaren]

It's never bothered me at all and I use it all the time, I don't see it as a word that was created in order to be an insult.

Karen :g1:

[luvSophia]

I am with Hope. I am not fond of the word and do not use it myself. If others want to identify themselves that way more power to them. The word is used all too frequently in a derogatory fashion for me to care for it.

[MJ]

the idea of me dating again scares me to death and at my age whats the point... and that word well it's just a word :straightface:

[Kaitlyn Michele]

I personally don't mind the word at all..

i know its used negatively sometimes, but its a harmless short version of transperson...

in context, perhaps on a dating site its more of the negative..."looking for a tranny" doesnt sound very nice..

[Teri Jean]

Pam, I'm in the same situation being single after 35 yrs of marriage and the idea of dating is scary as ever. I don't find being tanssexul an issue and terms to discribe what I am are what they are. If someone ask or stated I was a tranny I may respond with I'm transfemale.

The other side is I'm not eager to date but to have fun by experiancing the single life for a while. Hugs sis, ttyl. Teri

[Mariah]

I prefer not to be call it, but it's just no big deal to me.


Mariah

[Sharon]

I call myself a tranny all the time, but another (non-TS) person who uses it in my presence had better have a friendly tone of voice when they say it.

[Veronica_Jean]

I have to agree with several that have already posted. It snot so much the word itself, but how it is used and the intent.

Like many other words, they can be used in many ways.

I am not looking forward to dating as like many of you I was not good at it 30 years ago either. The good news is that I'm not ready or interested quite yet so its not a big concern for me.

Hang in there Pam.

Maybe you can get a free newspaper like I recently from the local "old folks" organization inviting you to bingo and cards, and pictures of 80 year olds sitting in the park on a sunny day.

I know I'm not young, but I don't need a walker quite yet either!

Veronica

[Pink Person]

If someone uses the word tranny as a positive informal term that means transperson, transfeminine person, transmasculine person, transfemale person, or transmale person then I think it's okay.

If someone uses the term to trivialize, insult, or invalidate the above types of people then it is definitely not okay. Unfortunately, the negative uses of the term are very prevalent, so I understand your feelings.

[ronny]

Well, no I think you are not too sensitive. I just see myself as a post op ts...all woman. My advise is simply be yourself...a beautiful woman waiting to be found. Enjoy your life with friends and just let the other happen where and when it will. Congrats..u look good girl!!

Roni

[Eileen]

Pamela you may already have and active social life but if you do not, it is a good place to start. It looks like many of us were not comfortable dating years ago and for many, including me, the thought of dating may seem even more frigthening today. For me, atthis time in my transition, I find having an active social life is very fulfilling. In time perhaps I will want to move on. Just enjoy being being your true self. Being happy is a great facilitator.

As for Tranny, I do not like it and my reaction to the word depends on who and how it is used. In any case, someone's use of the word is not going to dampen my day.

Eileen

[Genifer Teal]

Tranny could apply to many of the variety of us here. Possibly it applies the least to our TS sisters. I used to take offense to the word. My last GF used it all the time. I quickly realized she used it generically to refer to anyone who is trans. I've since adopted the word in my own vocabulary and no longer mind it's use. On occasion I can still take it in a bad way but for the most part I would not worry about it.

Gen

[Plasibeau]

The issue trully is the context and the company. Even in certain company the context becomes even more important. It would seem to be the n*gga issue that many afro-americans try to use, but the fact remains that the word is negative and honestly shouldn't be used at all. Just like tr*nny. But that said, I'd rather be called either of those than coon or *******.

[meri]

I too am bother by the connotation of the word "tranny".

Hey, if you interested in dating, why not go to a regular "hetro" dating site? You just never know who you are going to find in such places.

[CharleneT]

I think it is all about context, when and how it is used.

Oh, and I call Sharon a Tranny all the time .... too ! :tongueout

[carolinoakland]

I feel that the word Tranny is as offensive to the trans culture as the "N" word is to the african american culture... and used just about the same way. Stupidly.

[Arianna Aine]

personally, some of the words people use for transgender/transsexual people (and even cross-dressers and transvestites sometimes) really, really bug me. a smacked someone in the head for using 'she-male' in my presence once. another time, a friend of mine punched someone in the face for calling me a 'tranny' (which was amusing, though more violent than i would like :heehee:). while the second bugs me less than the first, it still bugs me.

i suppose i could be being a little too sensitive, i would never deny that possibility, but i definitely don't appreciate being called those words...my name is aria, damnit.