coming out strategy

[girlalex]

I recently thought about why it is so hard for some of us to come out. i think its because when we meet some one we introduce our selves en drub and purposely appear to be "normal" or act "like a man" because we think that their first impression of us is so important. and then when years pass and you become good friends you realize that the sooner you come out the better you would feel.
so i say if we approach someone who we might want to befriend with, at a party, club or whatever, why won't we just appear as who we really are as soon as we meet that person instead of dealing with how to come out years later. in other words lets say you are in a club and someone approaches you. obviously don't tell them straight up that you cd after a few drinks but just be yourself and don't try to hide. and if he/she end up asking if you are gay, bi ect tell them you cd. now if they don't like it that means you won't have to deal with it years later, therefore less problems for you.
so what you all think?

[Jessy]

I think I mentioned something like this recently.
Nobody knows about me, and I'm having hard times trusting people after bad experiences. It made me consider to move away, to a new area, meet new people, and be open about it right away. It would get rid of the feeling of having to loose something when you have to tell it to someone already close to you, that might not accept it in the end.

Still, I'm not sure if I'd have the courage to pull it through. Fact is that the longer I wait, the harder it gets, and the more people might think that I am ashamed, after hiding it first. I'm not ashamed, I'm just afraid of rejection, and being an outsider. That happened a lot in my life with even the most normal things.

I think my first goal is to try finding people in real life that are into cd, or at least familiar with it and supportive. I think that would help me a lot and would make a good first step for me. Don't know yet what the next step might be, and don't wanna think about it yet, only time will tell...

[Mandy]

I was given some good advice & I have chosen to follow it for now, If you tell someone, you just carnt Untell them, cos it just dont work like that in some cases:o

[tamarav]

I believe that letting people see the real you, the kind and generous person that you are, will overshadow the CDing. Let them get to know you, and maintain your same level of sanity, just let them know that you have a little extra hobby that none of them probably have. Do a manly thing and one-up them. Men hate it when you have something they don't..

I was with a group of guys once that were out-telling each other and doing the male thing, I have a bigger car, truck, whatever and I just sat there. When someone got around to me to let me lower myself in their eys by not having the same interests or as much as them, I just told them that I was a professional crossdresser. Sorta stopped the whole conversation until they looked at my web site.

[NatalieBliss]

I think an issue this does not address is people that fear for their jobs or place in the community at large. It has been said but you can't un-tell people and if your are not out to everyone telling relative strangers is risky business.