Best way to come out?

[Amy Gurl]

I want to come out as a girl...what's the best way to tell your freinds and your family??

[karen68]

Hi Amy i want to do that too so I will be watching this thread with much trepidation :D

[Sherry-Stephanie]

LOL is there a good way????

Who are you going to come out to and what do you think their response will be??? Each one probably needs to be done differently deepnding on who your coming out to....prepare for the best and worse and also fro a bumpy ride...just incase...

Good luck...

[Loni]

to test the waters. might even open the talk. leave a couple books laying around talking about cross dressing.

.

[Joann Smith]

Not too sure bout whats the BEST way ....but i can tell you what the worse is .../what ever you do ....do not go to the family reunion en femm...

not a good idea

trust me

Joann

[Pepper2783]

Well I don't know but when I told the few of my friends I didn't do it as Megan. I did it as Steve. I told people one at a time each person had a chance to ask me any question.

I think maybe you should have a coming out party? Drinks CLOSE FRIENDS, and family. And you know DO IT BIG girl. If you want to REALLY come out. Thats what I would do. Hold the party at a friends house even. And let people be comfortable and in enjoy them self and you'r new self. And it's an excuse to look FABULOUS. Think about all the gown SHOPPING! And who don't love getting liquored up. :drink:

[Kim_Bitzflick]

When you find a good way, let me know.

I kind of like the idea of the big party, but I think all you will get out of that is gossip.

One on one sounds good too. Find one or two people who accept you then work your way up (or down) the ladder.

I guess it's all up to you.

[Nicole Erin]

Dress all up, and do Karaoke to the Kiki Dee song "I got the music in me"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O825dkAyadY

I bet if TG'ness was more "out" in 74, this would have been a fav for TG and drag queens abound.

[Jessy]

I like the party idea, but as a second step. One on one seems better in my opinion, you can select who you want to tell first, and answer everyone's questions in private.
Start with trusted family and/or friends, people that you are most comfortable with and think they will understand and accept. Once you have some support on your side, it will be easier to continue.

Be prepared for both positive and negative comments. But don't show defeat if people don't understand, show them it is a part of you, and it doesn't mean you are a different person.

It will take courage, but I'm convinced you feel relieved when it's over. It'll open up a new world, and you have more people in your real life that you can talk to about it. And ofcourse you can go out being yourself, without having to watch your back for people that might "catch" you.

[sissystephanie]

If you are young and not married, tell your parents before anyone else! Do it in an honest, truthful manner without hiding anything. It may hurt them, or you, but you will be better off.

Now if you are older and married, it is a totally different story. The proper time to tell your wife is BEFORE you marry! If it is too late for that, then sit down with her and tell her the truth! You may lose a wife, but if that is the case it would have happened anyway.

Believe me, after 70 plus years of being a CD, I do know what I am talking about! If you want more information, PM me anytime!

[AllThingsPretty]

Just be honest. If your friends and family truly love you, they will support you :)


Not too sure bout whats the BEST way ....but i can tell you what the worse is .../what ever you do ....do not go to the family reunion en femm...

not a good idea

trust me

Joann

I would love to hear that story :D

[Jessy]

I would love to hear that story :D
That makes 2 of us :heehee:

[Christina Horton]

Not too sure bout whats the BEST way ....but i can tell you what the worse is .../what ever you do ....do not go to the family reunion en femm...

not a good idea

trust me

Joann


Lol I may not have gone to a family reunion but I did go to my high school reunion as Christina. Wow that was Fun. I wrote all about it.

The party is a neat idea bit I think the better idea is to tell them one by one. Like parents if you not married and so one sown the line. Just be ready with answers to give them. Like the girl scouts say all ways sell cookies and be prepaired. You might as said above may lose a wife or maybe friends but what do you want to do. Be unhappy all your life or tell the people you love and care about your secret or live on fear of being caught and outed with out educating them. Ya the party would be fun and could be the way you might want to go but it could have people embaresesd in front of others. Not good. Think of how you would want to be told something you would not want to have a room full of people all know and you are red in the face. One on one is best. Good luck.

[prene]

Well kind of.

I dressed all the way and looked to good I shaved my legs plus.

I was with a few friends a long time ago.

[Carole Cross]

I told my parents face to face and gave them some information I downloaded from the internet. I think the best way is to be honest and let them know what your intentions are, whether or not you want to transition or just live as a woman or even just dress up occasionally. Honesty is the best policy.

It is scary and I was very nervous but once you tell them you will get an immense sense of relief and wont have to worry about them finding out anymore. :)

[Shelly Preston]

Please read the link on how to tell your partner

You will find it at the top of the MTF section and in my signature

This has lots of good information for telling friends and family

Good luck to those taking this step

[Rianna Humble]

I want to come out as a girl...what's the best way to tell your freinds and your family??

I can't honestly tell you the best way, but I can offer some opinions based on my experience (at work) and some of the things I have read here.

Firstly, before telling anyone, I would sit down and try to make a list of possible questions with honest answers. If you find a question where you are not sure of the answer be prepared to say so.

Next, I would speak to one or maximum two people to start with and make it as matter of fact as possible. If there have been clues that they might have spotted, remind them of this and don't be ashamed.

Be prepared to listen to what they say as well as to their questions. Don't answer them until you are sure that you have understood their point/question and don't expect them to take it all in at once - after all you didn't understand everything in one blinding flash so why should they?

If you encounter a negative reaction, don't get angry and don't be put off either. If they are true friends they will come around to seeing that this is the real you and if they are not, then who needs them anyway?

Just my :2c:

[thenewgirl]

Hello everyone. Im still new and shy my name well alicia mack i guess. I live home with my parents and dad and my brother are military, Ive been dressing discreetly for about a year, and my fear is getting caught because ill get beat up and kicked out, My mom is the only understanding one but she doesnt know. Its getting to the point when i stopped dressing and very depressed, i was thinking about goin to the doctor but i would lose everything. Im sorry to clog with my drama, Thank you for listening::daydreaming::Angry3:

[carrie-ann]

I did it one on one lost most of my family and friends so good luck be ready for the fall out. Best wishes to you. I am happy even through all that.

[PretzelGirl]

I vote for one on one. That way you can have a discussion and work through each person's questions. If you come out to a mass of people at once, you will probably have people that hold back on acceptance because they may get swayed by the gang mentality and the fear that they may get ridiculed themselves. Others may just be quiet instead of speaking up. And if a non-accepting person is the first to speak up, it could be all over unless there is a very strong accepting person to shoot them down. It just seems it has more of a chance of going wrong than right. Ultimately, one on one is a more controllable and friendlier situation.

[SuzanneBender]

I see two methods here. First is rent a billboard, put a pic of Amy and your male self on it and roll the dice. :heehee:

A more realistic approach is what many of the ladies have already articulated. Start with your loved ones and the friends that you feel will be most accepting and work your way down the list. If you are married start with your wife. If you are not, start with your parents or a trusted sibling.

I just came out to my bride a month ago. I wrote her a letter and then read it to her because I knew I would forget something. Thus far it has gone well. Expect rough roads and whatever you do be honest about who you are, where you are going, and realize you are moving forward no matter what.

Remember that you have our support and feel free to PM me if you need to chat.


Please read the link on how to tell your partner

You will find it at the top of the MTF section and in my signature

This has lots of good information for telling friends and family

Good luck to those taking this step

[Peri Bender]

After Suzanne told me, I found this webstie and it helped calm my nerves. Well worth a look.

http://cdsecretgarden.femmegetaway.com/index.html

Good luck and I will say some extra prayers.

Peri