Finding the balance between both of our "sides"

[StephanieCD]

I'm curious. See, on all the gender tests and all that crap I weigh in right around the middle - androgynous. I love to get girly and dress up, particularly now that I'm accepting myself. But I also enjoy being a guy, about half the time... ok, that's BS, it's more like once in a while. Anyway - I know many of us have manly lives outside of our closet and I'm wondering...

Do you find it difficult to find the balance? I'm working toward a fine balance - where someday I can say...

"honey, I look better in pants than you and hotter in heels than your honey so go screw" ;) (joke)

I don't really have a pointed question so much as I want to see how people feel about balancing the half of themselves we don't talk about on here... seems to me that being girly helps me appreciate my manly side more. Anyone?

[Tristen Cox]

'WE' don't bother trying to be 'him' anymore. For me 'that' was the illusion. Being fem is all there is for me. :)

[darcyann]

Hello

Well for me anyway, I am living more as a guy, but that is because I am seperated and getting a divorce and live with parents until I get back on my feet. Once I get out truthly I would want to do it 24/7 yes I am still closet with my friends and family. So I would be a 24/7 woman all 230 lbs of it lol. But some people don't have a choice, job, life or what not. I choose to be more woman now than I have ever done and I love it.


Love

Darcy Ann

[Phoebe Reece]

For everyone the balance point is going to be different. There have been times in my life when, for one reason or another, I simply couldn't dress completely for some long stretches of time. During those times it was in the back of my mind that given the opportunity I would dress a lot, perhaps even 24/7. Now my situation is very different. I can dress up pretty much whenever I want for almost as long as I want (there are exceptions to everything). But, I find I don't really need to dress up more than 3 or 4 days a month to satisfy my femme side. When I dress, I really prefer to do the whole nine yards - makeup, wig, nail polish, clothes, heels, etc. - and that takes me a couple of hours to accomplish (shaving, showering, makeup, deciding what to wear, etc.). Also, after many years of being unable to go out while dressed enfemme, I don't get dressed up now just to sit around the house. If I'm dressed as a woman, I'm on my way out the door. I just don't want to do that every day.

I do a lot of guy things and genuinely enjoy them. For me, it's just easier to dress as a guy most of the time. And that is a choice I make and it is not forced on me by my wife or other circumstances. I would have to say that I have reached my own personal balance, and am satisfied with it.

[ChristineRenee]

Well for me finding the balance means bringing Chrissie out more and more to the general public...even when in drab! I have been going out and about more down here wearing a little bit of makeup, maybe some short shorts...etc. I fully expect to have some outings as Chrissie very soon as well...specifically when Pattie & Gem come down to visit us. My wife Penny seems to understand the need for me to be Chrissie outwardly more and more now, and while I'm sure that it is not something that she really is looking forward to personally, she does seem to be acknowledging the importance of it for me and seems to be accepting of it as long as I do it away from our general area here.

I held back for so long my sisters...largely to placate my wife because of our situation back in Michigan with living in a small community where my wife was very prominately known as a teacher at the local high school and having both current and ex-students working at businesses all over town. I respected her fervent desire to keep this out of the public eye and stayed true to my promise to her in that regard despite the fact that it was very personally challenging...particularly from an emotional standpoint and with me being on HRT now for the past year and a half.

I have been seeing some very positive changes in Penny's attitude about Chrissie, and I believe that once her tunnel vision focus is off of our new surroundings and she finally feels settled in and contented with everything, that she will start to become a more active participant in my CD world. Things appear to be changing for the better now, and I very much am looking forward to the future of finally being able to be the true person that I really am.;) :)

[emmicd]

I am very content as a male because I have accepted my femme side and realize that dressing occasionally and being able to buy femme clothes is really all I need. I do not have to go the full nine yards to be happy. I just have to wear clothes I like.

I will never go out in public in a dress but I can wear one late at night on occasion when my family is sleeping and just feel feminine for that brief moment.

As long as I can wear womens slacks and jeans with a nice tailored mens shirt I am happy.

I also feel I dress better because of it.

Emmi

[gennee]

StephanieCD:

I'm very happy being a male. I'm also happy with my femme side because I feel complete. I can separate both lives. When I'm alone, I can put on a dress or a skirt. I love window shopping for women's clothing and planning my wardrobe. I closeted to family and friends but content with the way things are. I know that some day in the future, I'm going to let it all hang out (when I'm out of town on business). I'm so happy that I discovered my femme side and can become the person i desire to be.

Gennee :)

[CharleneCD]

My male side has always been lacking because of the years of repressing my feminine side. Since letting Charlene out I have seen amazing growth in my male personality. Not as much growth as the fem side though :D . As for balance, I am just letting things develop naturaly until I find where the proper mix should be.

[Rachel Morley]

I feel as though I don't really have a "male" side in at least the traditional sense of what males normally like to do and be... i.e. they like sports, or going out drinking with their buddies, or hunting/fishing, or any kind of macho behavior.

So the issue of having one's sides balanced doesn't really apply to me. I kind of agree with Chrissie that my femme self is actually becoming more prominent in my everyday life. I wear fairly obviously women's clothes and I sometimes like to wear mascara, earrings and perfume too, all in "feminized guy mode". So the only balance for me is the degree of feminization in public. Either I'm a girly guy or I'm totally en femme.