An escape or how you feel inside?

[emmicd]

Crossdressing is what most of us have integrated into our lives. We all have a need to dress for various reasons and in varying degrees.

a)Do you dress because it is an escape for you and you are content with your male persona but enjoy being in touch with femme side occasionally?

or

b)Do you dress because you feel more connected to your femme side and feel you need to dress up and explore your femme side more and more.

How far do you need to go with your exploration?

Emmi

[emmicd]

For me the dressing is an escape and kind of theapuetic in a way. It helps me relax and just escape the male world for a bit.

I am very content in my male personality and would not change that for all the dresses in the world! I have too many responsibilities and enjoy my wife and being a father!

I admit I like to wear a dress in private occasionally but I don't need to dress en femme 24/7.

It seems there are some girls out there who do need to dress more often and seem to hate their male side and would dress 24/7 if they could.

I kind of feel for them because we all should find happiness in our lives.

My happiness is derived from spending quality time with my wife and son!

Emmi

[Debbie Kong]

Good question.
It used to be A but now it's B.
I go all the way.
Debbie

[SaraGoth]

I am actually content on being a male (though I'm not satisfied with my muscles - will need it when the baby comes around next year! :D )

I would say, then, that I'm an A, though it doesn't mean I don't like exploring 'more and more'... :) I will always be a guy and that's fine with me. I view it as an expression of my feminine side - perhaps almost to the extent of a 'secondary' personality, which I can let go from time to time. Goth for me is one way to 'let go'...and look pretty darn sexy doing it.

Though, when it comes down to it...my wife is the babe and the hot one. I can't compete with Japanese women.

Perhaps another way to shape this for people who are in relationships or who desire to be in one (I'm talking about CD guys), is: Is your CD persona something of an ideal woman to you (something your own significant other could/would not do; a fantasy of sorts), or is it just a physical/visual expression of your feminine side. Hmmmm....I'd say both for me, in a way, but not to disrespect my wife, it's just that she'd never get into clothes I wear - a bit of a conservative that way - and just the way I love her too!

Sarayuki

[kysmet]

Well, when I was dressing all the time and wasn't sure of who I was and what I wanted, then it was because I wanted it more and more. Now, however, since I don't get to dress as often as I would like it seems different. But, that could also be attributed to the fact that I am older and know more about myself and what I want in life. There was a time in my life that I thought SRS was the way to go for me. But as I began a new journey within myself and started seeking my own kind of enlightenment, I began to realize that for me, SRS was nothing more than an escape from who I really was. So, I guess in honesty my life a few years ago was a mixture of A and B. A: in the sense that it was an escape and B: because I thought I needed it more and more. Now it has evolved into something completely different from either answer. Now it is more like I am content with my male and female sides coexisting while at the same time content exploring my femme nature by itself when I have the chance. I also find that I am able to connect with my female side while in boy mode sometimes and people don't even notice. Maybe this is what we as humans need to evolve to the next level, a spiritual and mental form of asexuality. I am not anywhere near to discovering the entirety of who I am, but I can say with confidence that I am happy to be who I am right now.

Ericka Jean

[MelFoxxCd]

It is definately b for me. I feel more in touch with myself and the world as Melissa then I do in drab. As the male persona, I am moody, irratable and generally not a nice person at times then along comes Melissa and a gentler person rises from the inside that helps around the house, wants to spend time with people and is happy and boncy most times. It feels like I have two people living in one body at times. One who is selfish and inconsiderate, the other thinking of other people and helpful.

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

For me it's A. As they say, I'm happy to visit, but wouldn't want to live there. ;)

But seriously, escapism is one reason I started CDing. I was a social misfit around age 10-11 and what better way to be someone else than to change your gender. I suppose if I had been a bit geekier I might of joined Starfleet instead and be practicing my Klingon instead of my make-up. But I doubt escapism alone would have started me cross-dressing if I hadn't had a feminine side I felt the need to express/explore.

The escapism factor may be why I don't have any particular interest in underdressing. When I'm in guy mode, I'm in (stylish) guy mode. Also maybe it's because I've got a fairly androgynous personality, if various personality tests are to be believed, so I don't feel the need for an external reminder of my feminine side.

I'm happy to dress part of the time and except for while at conference, I'm not interested in doing so full-time.

To Sarayuki's question, I think most of us are acting out an idealized and/or fantasy version of femininity, even as it may simultaneously a physical/visual expression of one's feminine side. Hence we tend to be more girly girls and sex bombs than the typical GG.

[MarinaTwelve200]

For me the dressing is an escape and kind of theapuetic in a way. It helps me relax and just escape the male world for a bit.

I am very content in my male personality and would not change that for all the dresses in the world! I have too many responsibilities and enjoy my wife and being a father!

I admit I like to wear a dress in private occasionally but I don't need to dress en femme 24/7.

It seems there are some girls out there who do need to dress more often and seem to hate their male side and would dress 24/7 if they could.

I kind of feel for them because we all should find happiness in our lives.

My happiness is derived from spending quality time with my wife and son!

Emmi


Yes, CD is an "Escape" for me also. Ive always held that CD was not a "condition " in itself but a psychological TOOL used for various reasons for people with a variety of "issues" and different conditions.

I do not "hate" my male body/self---Indeed, I prefer it, But I have found CD can psychologically "detach" ME from my male identity/self---in effect giving me a mini vacation away from myself where all my stresses and worries assoiated with being a male, melt away. After a few hours, I go back to my male self, in a more relaxed state of mind. CD is sorta like a drug, I find I often need a "fix" every couple of weeks.

Now from reading other posts, it is obvious to me that many other guys CD for very different reasons. The more promenent one being to escape TO their "real (fem) self" ---Guys that actually WANT to be female and feel that the fem self is "who they really are". Hey this is cool too, although I fear their chances for happiness are more limited. These people MIGHT be defined as transsexual, but perhaps not to the more extreme degrees that force some to seek surgical help.

These conditions seems to be the inverse of each other, but CD is employed in both cases to symbolically change "identites". One should not assume that CDing alone is symptomatic of but a single condition.

There is also another condition of interest, somewhat obscure, classifed as "Non-Homosexual Transsexualisim" called AUTOGYNOPHILIA That has two interesting characteristics,that may be of interest to this group. The person WANTS to be a woman, but is a hetrosexual male. And tend to "transition" in later life--late 40's and beyond---After the kids are grown, etc. (unlike the homosexual Transsexuals who transition earlier) As the name implies, AG=Self/woman/love Autogynophiles are said to be in love with the female side of themselves. The latest theory is that AG is a strongly internialized hetrosexualality. its origin is unknown.

[ChristineRenee]

Definitely b for me. Chrissie needs to be allowed to be herself more outwardly. Too much has been kept inside for too long.;)

[Jonien]

Crossdressing is what most of us have integrated into our lives. We all have a need to dress for various reasons and in varying degrees.

a)Do you dress because it is an escape for you and you are content with your male persona but enjoy being in touch with femme side occasionally?

or

b)Do you dress because you feel more connected to your femme side and feel you need to dress up and explore your femme side more and more.

How far do you need to go with your exploration?

Emmi


b) Jonien is very much a girl and loving it,
looking forward to being fully feminized

[Joanna]

Most definatlet B all the way



Joanna

[joni-alice]

reasons change like the weather
i just do it to it
whatever the it is












;)

[Noel Chimes]

It has been over a month since I have been here. There has been a lot of searching, as well as some highs and lows. For me this is an escape from the madness we call reality. I can only speak for myself. I come here to be reminded that there is still a world where people can be accepted for their own self worth, and not for materialistic value. :thanks:

[SaraGoth]

This is something I've always thought about as some sort of rationalization of CDing, at least for me...perhaps it'll help others to come to terms with it.

Besides being a way to escape and or create some sort of idealistic feminine image that would otherwise be unreachable in the 'real' world, or even a way to 'connect' with one's own feminine side, it's also like an exploration of the feminine side in general - what it means to be a woman. Men have tried ages to know what woman are/want/can be, etc, and it still has eluded them; their efforts mostly in vain. Nod to Mel Gibson...

Ignorance of the other half (read= better half) isn't bliss, in my view of understanding, coping and bettering one's self/others in light of the opposite sex. Therefore, it's almost like a mission, so-to-speak to get to the 'essence of woman', and though I don't delude myself into thinking that I'll find any major secrets or come to some sort of ephany, I do think CDing allows me to get closer to an understanding of women in general just a little more than say non-CD's. Having a wife and four sisters and helping my mom cook in the kitchen when growing up helped for sure... :eek:

I will and always shall be facinated, inspired and moved by women in ways that I hope can make me a better person for myself and for those around me. In a prayer to who's ever in charge, I think it would be 'educational' and well, fun, for me to return as an actual woman in my next life...that is if reincaration does in fact exist. Call me crazy but child birth is simply one big thing men cannot experience and or really understand, but really should, in my view of the 'bigger picture'.

Peace,
Sarayuki
:cool:

[racquel]

" Now it is more like I am content with my male and female sides coexisting while at the same time content exploring my femme nature by itself when I have the chance. I also find that I am able to connect with my female side while in boy mode sometimes and people don't even notice. Maybe this is what we as humans need to evolve to the next level, a spiritual and mental form of asexuality. I am not anywhere near to discovering the entirety of who I am, but I can say with confidence that I am happy to be who I am right now."
kysmet has a clear insight I think.
This seems to be the state I am in. :thumbsup:

[Wendy me]

i dress because it makes me feel like me..and i can never get boared with it as i can always change my look to sute my mood ... i can have my hair up and hassle free or style it to be a big to a pain ..and just as comfy in short shorts as a long dress...this is who i am ....so i think i would be a "b".........

[vanessa]

I have to go with B. As I spend more and more time as Vanessa, I realize that, for me, it is neither escape, nor a thrill that I seek. It's comfort. I'm comfortable letting all the masculine fronts go for a short time, and am even getting to the point where it's almost harder to be masculine than femme. More work, more mental concentration is being required of me to keep looking, acting, and sounding like a man than as Vanessa. It just comes naturally. Almost as if all the moves, gestures, posture, speech patterns, etc. etc. were an archived program that I've had all along but never tapped into.