Femme gays people and mannerisms

[christine55]

Have you ever noticed just how femme some gay people act.
Their mannerisms seem so natural and apart from the way they dress and their body shape they could easily pass as women.
What I am wondering is if these people had to practice for a long time to learn feminine mannerisms or was it just natural for them. I wonder if some time during their childhood they made a conscious decision to act femine or else as so many gay people, even now, are not out in high school, at the time they came out did they just start acting femine or if they had to practice for ages like we do.

It seems to come so hard for us to successfully and convincingly emulate women. Why is it come so easily for them and so hard for us?

Hugs, Christine

Hugs, Christine

[NathalieX66]

I am going to throw just one component of crossdressing and transgender interests....that is we crave something of the opposite sex. Maybe we want to be it because we like it.

[sherri52]

Some have the perfect mannerisms of a girl or even more than a girl, but they are not always gay. Where I worked back in the 80's we had a delivery guy who was small and petite with the mannersims of a GG. Most of my employees would talk about how gay he was for hrs after he left. One day I noticed his truck still outside an hour after his delivery. Making sure he was ok I checked the truck only to find him in his birthday suit with not one but two beautiful girls. I talked to his boss later (not about what I seen) and he told me that he had all teh girls all over him and that he thought it was an act. It wasn't an act but he did get more than his share of beautiful women.

[Stephenie S]

Christine, the reason it seems so easy for "them" and so hard for "you", is that you are not doing it all the time. For you, it remains an act. For them, gay or straight, it is just normal behavior.

Stephie

[AllieSF]

One of the easiest and most accurate ways of answering your own question is to ask the femme acting gays when you see them. Noe, i am not saying asking them without any previous conversation. But, rather, start a conversation with them and then ask them if you could ask a person question. You will be surprised how honest and open they will be. i run into a lot of gays and lesbians when i go out. Since I talk with everyone when out, i have no problems getting into fun and sometimes very interesting conversations. When I feel comfortable in a conversation with someone, I have no problem asking some very direct questions, which are almost always answered honestly. I have never asked someone your question yet, bit if I remember it the next time I am out, I will ask it. One thing is I have not really noticed is that femme gays have shown femme mannerisms. Most of the ones I have met and talked with are actually over the top with these characteristics, which seem exaggerated to me.

[ReineD]

Here (http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1203/why-is-lisping-stereotypically-associated-with-homosexuality) is as objective an explanation as any. Last paragraph.

[Noceedee]

Maybe they never learned to act masculine. I have often wondered if one did not have any outside influences would the natural thing be to have feminine or masculine mannerisms. Since we all start out feale in the womb maybe some of us just never pick up all the masculine stuff.

[Annaliese2010]

Have you ever noticed just how femme some gay people act. Their mannerisms seem so natural and apart from the way they dress and their body shape they could easily pass as women. What I am wondering is if these people had to practice for a long time to learn feminine mannerisms or was it just natural for them. It seems to come so hard for us to successfully and convincingly emulate women. Why is it come so easily for them and so hard for us?It's obvious they simply ARE that way, haven't 'learned' it, just are the way they are.


...It wasn't an act but he did get more than his share of beautiful women.Why am I guessing that he is well-endowed? Bet!

[christine55]

I could easily see how much one would be influenced by his community. Wouldn't it be nice to live with a few women as a woman for while? Talk about immersion therapy.

Hugs, Christine

[Joann0830]

I could easily see how much one would be influenced by this community. Wouldn't it be nice to live with a few women as a woman for while? Talk about immersion therapy.

Hugs, Christine

This came about in one of my psych classes about the feminine charcteristics of some, Our Instructor said that is because we as male are groomed and become conscious of how we act in public and as young boys or young men we tend to cover up by correcting our feminism while in public, what in reality would come normal to us as we feel feminine inside and project it and feel comfortable. He also said as Young men you would get your head handed to you if other boys or men would see you act like that. Joann0830:battingeyelashes::heehee::love:

[eluuzion]

I am pretty sure it is the result of accidentally touching a gay person...:bonk::confused2::bonk::eg::GD::laughing:

Ok, could be wrong on that one...:brolleyes:

jus' kidd'n...

I agree with Stephenie S on this one.

[Elizabeth 66]

I also in the past have come across a lot of gay people, and had a couple of gay friends, i think it is not that they work on acting fem, rather we have worked on acting masculine, i on occasion have been asked if i am gay, because at times i can be quite effeminate, that is before i accepted that i am different.

I had a friend who i knew way gay, but very few others did, no one at work knew, until i got a job were he worked, he felt that people would find out because i knew and might let it slip, so he came out. after he came out he became a lot more outlandish in the way he behave and really layed it on, so much to the point he started to offend people.

so what i think i am trying to say is, some people are naturally more effeminate and don't need to work on it, others have to work on letting that side show, and a third group has to work at learning how to be. just as when i was younger i had to consciously act more male i now have to unlearn that.

I hope i made my point :doh:

[wearingtanpantyhose]

Many very feminine men are really acting like caricatures with far more exaggerated movements. Real women have more subtle ways they carry themselves. Ever watch RuPaul's drag race? Though some are quite visually convincing, they act like flaming gay men in dresses.

I want to be perceived as a woman, not a flamboyant man in a dress.

[Vivian Best]

I have a nephew that is openly gay. I was around the boy during his early years and everyone could tell he was different. As early as he learned to walk he was feminine. As he grew older his mannerisms became even more feminine. To my knowledge he isn't a crossdresser but then he doesn't know I'm one either. He didn't have to learn the things females do and men don't. They came natural to him. He is in his mid 40s now and hasn't changed since he was very young. Put a wig and dress on him and he is just as female as any GG except for a very few MINOR details.

[Sarah Michelle]

My step-son is gay. Didn't come out [openly] until he went to university but he nevr had any boy-friends in school, always girls. He had a finely tuned fashion sense from the time he could speak. and he always preferred shoes and earrings over trucks and guns.
Now, he carries himself effeminitely, wears a bit of make-up but he was clearly hard-wired to be what he was from birth.
And look at al the posts here; how many of these writers have been cross-dressing since they were old enough to sort out their own clothes.

Joann0830 is on the right track, we are what we are but we pretend to be what fits in best where we have to be, except for those who have the true courage to be themselves.

[mklinden2010]

**Have you ever noticed just how femme some gay people act.


My first thought was that this was an insulting question. Who says they're acting? But, well, OK, for some it is an act, or, you wish is was "only" an act. Yeeess, I have noticed. Granted.

A harder question is, "How you ever noticed how masculine some gay people act (Are)?"

Feminine gay stereotypes anger a great many gay men. They feel such behavior makes gay people, in general look ridiculous. It would be like professional working women having to be around/compete with "clueless bimbos" all the time. Very hard to get and/or keep a decent amount of respect when someone is thoughtlessly undermining you all the time.

Most gay men are either very masculine, or, not different in outward appearance and behavior from most men. They're manly men and proud of it - not girly men at all.

Word to the wise.

[Nicole Erin]

Some gay men do tend to overdo it.
I go to school with a few gay men, one of them is a bit feminine, maybe a softer male (despite the huge manly truck he drives), but we have one that when he walks by, tulips sprinke the path.

Women do carry themselves different, it is a very subtil feminine.

[Slim Jim]

Why is it come so easily for them and so hard for us?

Because they're gay and you're not?

[PhillyGuy2Girl]

Not every gay man is feminine or acts like it. I know a guy in my neighborhood,6' 5" 250lbs,all muscle,a contractor,drives a truck and does al the typical guy stuff and he's gay. I know because he is open about it and his boyfriend is the same as him. What I'm trying to say is you can judge a book by its cover.



Felicity :)

[Barbara Dugan]

I am gay , and my mannerism are the same since I was a child, sometimes I try to act more manly though I dont make a good job at it if I am around coworkers or in situations that require it. When I am dress or around other gay men it feels just natural nothing forced or simulated:hugs:

[Fab Karen]

The percentage of gay guys you're referring to, it's innate, not something they adopted.