Inqiring minds want to know - Week 2

[Di]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know

The second set of questions our GG's would like to ask to promote better understanding. We've put the questions together and will be posting them in sets of three every week. Please feel free to answer any number of them. We appreciate your input!

Here's the link to the Week 1 questions for those of you who missed them and would like to participate: Week 1 Questions (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2121858#post2121858)


Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

[WandaRae2009]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries? Yes, and I try to answer truthfully, and reasure here.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?I do express my softer feelings in male mode

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?[/QUOTE]I think so. I am only turned by by women in male mode or dressed. I get turned on by a good looking woman like any other male. Maybe even more as am also envious of the clothing

[Kathi Lake]

#4 - Do you really listen to your SO: Oh my gosh, yes! I "pedestal" this woman so much - though not in a creepy way. :) Her concerns are my concerns. It is one of the reasons why I try to keep her "in the dark" with my dressing - it is her wish. Well, that and to be careful when out and about.

#5 - Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode? That's so not me. I do express my softer feelings - empathy, nurturing, concern, sensitivity, and much more. I believe that having and expressing those feelings make me a much better father, a much better husband, and a much better man.

#6 - 6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is? Is it wrong on this board to swear? No? Good. Then my answer is Hell Yeah! Women rock! Men are smelly, dirty and hairy. Women are soft and curvy and smell wonderful (especially after they exercise - just like fresh rain. Shudder! :)). Women, most certainly, "do it for me."

:)

Kathi

[kimdl93]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know
The second set of questions our GG's would like to ask to promote better understanding. We've put the questions together and will be posting them in sets of three every week. Please feel free to answer any number of them. We appreciate your input!
Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

4) I really do listen and I belive that I try to be responsive and reassuring.
5) I feel I express my softer feelings equally - whether en drab or male mode. I think I'm the same person - regardless of how I'm dressed.
6) gosh - hard to know, since I've only been me, not a non-CD male. I certainly am turned on sexually by women. I will acknowledge enjoying the opportunity to live out the fantasy/illusion of being a woman when I'm making love with a woman...

[Ms. Emily]

4. Yeah I wouldn't get into the realtionship in the first place if we didn't tust each other enough to be open. I usually try and get to know the girl before I date them anyways.

5.Isn't this kinda a broad assumption about males ?? I have no problem expressing any of those emotions and I've known non-cd males who were just as able.

6. I don't know how to answer this honestly. I like girls I don't think there are varying degrees unless your bi. The clothes I prefer to wear wouldn't change that

[dilane]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes, but the more direct and to the point, the better the attention :)


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Hey, that's an assumptive question. The softer feelings are accessible in either mode. I'm more likely to get teary-eyed in movies than my wife, for example. I wonder if some CD's use "I'm only nice when I dress up" as an excuse ...


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I have no idea. I have zero interest in porn, and I wasn't attracted to women until I was 16 or so, when some time bomb went off in me and I caught up in a hurry! I do look at and greatly appreciate attractive women I see in the real world, though, and I'm pretty typical in that from what I've observed.

[Jessy]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I have no SO, but being able to communicate (both talk and listen!) is in my opinion most important in a relationship. If I have a SO and she has questions, I will try to answer. If she has worries, I'll be willing to listen. If she starts threatening me, it'll be another story.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

In my case, it's mainly because of a history of being an outsider, while having a big need of social contacts. So I tried living more to the society standards of a man, but of course that didn't work out too well. It's just not me, I'd be living a lie.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I think so. I mean I don't know any better than being a CD, and I've never been digging too deep in other people's sexual experiences :heehee:

[SuzanneBender]

4) Yes. Well I think I do. At least I try. I still have that silly Y chromosome that causes periodic deafness and loss of memory, but I am doing my best to over come it. Since coming out to her we have had numerous wonderful talks and shared our concerns and hopes for the future. I wouldn't be much of a hubby if I didn't do my best to accommodate because lord knows she is giving it her all to accomodate me.

5) I feel I do express these in male mode. Once again it is much more prevalent since coming out to the love of my life. Although I have always been that person that can't stop the tears when the sappy commercial comes on tv.

6) Yuppers. There are too many things that I love about women to list. However, I think our view of females is significantly different than non-Cding males. We look at women through a different lens. One colored with a little bit of their experience. Therefore, I find myself being much more empathic with their point of view. I will use an example of a buddy of mine at work. Last week I was able to meet a young lady that we have spoken to numerous times on the phone. When I told my co-worker that I had met this young lady his first question was, "is she hot". I found myself taking great offense at this. Not only because I am a gentlemen, but also because I did not want to objectify her anymore than I desire to be objectified when dressed.

[AKAMichelle]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes - but I have never really gotten credit for this one. Since I don't end up seeing things her way = not listening


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I do feel like I can express those feelings, but everytime I do I get a very negative response from my wife. By her responses, she would be happier she thinks with one of those macho jerks.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Completely - I have all of the feelings which every other male has. The only difference is that instead of being the typical male jerk who is only concerned about his needs, I want a connection now before anything happens. I guess that I am closer to a female thinking on this one. If there are problems in the marriage then I can't perform.

More importantly, after my divorce is finalized this summer I do want to find another woman. I want a woman to feel like she is loved and has all the appeal - nothing missing. I want that connection but I know I am not ready for a long while.

[Marshchild]

4) Doesn't apply to me as I don't have an SO (and probably never will, given what a solitary animal I am).

5) There are two possible ways for me to answer this. The first is to say that this question is also non-applicable to me since I'm more or less in male mode all the time (regardless of what I wear). The second is to say that what I wear usually has little bearing on how I behave. I can display all the traits you mentioned when I'm wearing nothing but male attire; conversely, I can be a right :censor: when I'm in female stuff!

6) Eh, probably not TBH. I find women attractive, no doubt about that, but am also something of an asexual, so am not driven absolutely mad with lust by the sight of an attractive member of the opposite sex. What feelings I do experience seem to be somewhat, I don't know, "half-baked", for want of a better way of putting it. They appear in a relatively mild form, and then quickly die away. Not to complain, however! My situation has its advantages, I've found.


Men are smelly, dirty and hairy.

Oh come on, we're not all that bad! Indeed, there've been occasions when I've seen a man who's been downright beautiful (at which point, my mind will be filled with thoughts such as "Whoa!", "I'd turn gay for that!" and "I hope he's a CDer too - with a body and face like his, it'd be a crime if he wasn't!").

[Blaire]

4) Absolutely I listen to her!

5) I'm not sure I buy into the concept of a "male mode" vs a "female mode." With 1 extremely significant exception, self-expression of the "softer side" is not a problem no matter what I'm wearing. The minor problems that I do have I can put down to too many years of self-programming in trying to be the tough-guy. Expression is not a problem - lack of experience in communicating that expression is.

6) This one is a solid "mostly". Certainly women turn me on, but typically, a purely physical or "animal" attraction isn't enough to start the lust reaction by itself.

[PretzelGirl]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I feel I do. My wife is a fairly quiet lady. One of my rules for myself as I progressed was that I would pay particular attention to her concerns and anything she was unsure of would become a boundary. This caused me to create a few boundaries that were unneccessary, but that was better than the alternative.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I was one of those kids in school that went through a lot of hazing and bus stop fights. As a result, I tried to be the biggest conformist that I could be. So no expression here because of that. But as I have been exploring myself, there has been some change. It is hard to break life-long habits, but I feel there is some change.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Absolutely. I am hetero, so I don't see where my feelings would be different.

[celeste26]

4) My wife is even worse at it than me in expressing her concerns. I find that I will end up questioning her to bring them out so we can talk about them.

5)I've learned over the years and I hope I've gotten better at it.

6)I usually focus on the clothes/presentation and my male reaction to a good looking woman is something that I've tried to eliminate.

[Cassandra Lynn]

4. My SOs primary concerns and worries are if her food dish is filled, and that she gets taken for walks. Listen? We are on a wavelength beyond hearing!

5. PUHLEASE, get real....are you telling me i'm not sensitive! Why i oughta!
I mean yes of course. Honestly though, that was a loaded and somewhat unfair question. Would it be fair to say that the single CD may be afraid to show a soft side to a GG in fear that he may be thought weak?

6. Yes, deffinitely, but like said before, the visual attraction goes deeper for us. It's not just the physical beauty, it's also how she is presenting it, or the whole picture i suppose.

All in good jest gang. mj (Cassie)

[Karenmarie]

4. My SO does not know about Karenmarie but I would hope and pray
that my wife would express her concerns and I hope that I would
encourage her.

5. I have a very soft side whether male or female. Of course, if I am
out fishing with the boys, well thats something different. En-femme,
I am, and LOVE to be soft and feminine.

6. Yes, way down deep there is still a "boy" who loves to look at
women, but like mentioned above theres more to it. I love to look at
the outfits, dresses, skirts, shoes, make-up and generally the entire
presentations. After all is said and done, my wife will always remain
my "most important person" in my life, and never would I go out on her.
If she knew of my CDing and excepts it, even partially, she would
be even more important to me....if thats possible.

Karenmarie

[Kerigirl2009]

#4 I like to believe that I listen to my wifes concerns about everything not just about Crossdressing which actually does not come up as much as I thought it would.

#5 I know that my wife knows I like to dress feminine but still has never seen me and the reason that she has not seen Keri live and in person is she would then see me even more different then she already does since I told her. Someday I hope to overcome this though. So when it comes to being sensitive I do not want her associating me only as being girly so I try to keep the comments suttle. However I think if I was more open eith my feelings we would actually be a bit closer then we already are.

#6 As far as sexually turned on, It is unfortunate for me as I have never had a great sex-drive. I know I look at my wife and she turns me on emotionally, I guess that is sort of girly, but that is the way it is. I find a lot of things about women very attractive. To be totally honest I really love to see the view of a nice butt on a pretty figure. So minus the sex drive I wish I have more encounters.

[Rebecca Petersen]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know

The second set of questions our GG's would like to ask to promote better understanding. We've put the questions together and will be posting them in sets of three every week. Please feel free to answer any number of them. We appreciate your input!

Here's the link to the Week 1 questions for those of you who missed them and would like to participate: Week 1 Questions (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2121858#post2121858)


Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

(4)Totally a "Yes." Lucky for me she doesn't have many worries.
(5)I actually can. In fact, I'm told this is part of my "male" appeal.
(6)Obviously I can't speak for non-CD males, but my wife turns me on in a very conventional way. My femme side doesn't exist in the bedroom, and this is by choice.

[RachelPortugal]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her
concerns/worries?

Yes I do. I would not want the cause of her concerns to be a problem.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I don't! I can express those feelings very well in male mode. I just enjoy wearing female clothes.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I am turned on sexually by women I find attractive (and men for that matter). I did not know that being turned on as a non-CD male was any different to a CD-male. The way that the moving parts work does not change!

Rachael

[t-girlxsophie]

#1 YES I would be treating my wife with Disrespect If I didnt listen If she ever has concerns,She has Done so much for me and I would never dismiss anything she had to say,or ask of me

#2 Honestly,I have to say I do express my feelings and emotions.Not once have i subscribed to the theory that Men Don't Cry.I think your missing something in your life,If you can't show your emotions

#3I would say yes.Of course there is only one Woman I wish to get turned on by now,In whatever mode I'm in :hugs:

[MiraM]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
My SO is fully supportive of me and has not expressed any worries/concerns. If he did, I would listen to them and give them the merit they deserve.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I have no problem with this. I am always told I am the perfect wife.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Being gay, I would have to say no.

[Deborah Jane]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes I do, we talk about everything c/ding related and not c/ding related.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

In male mode I'm very much an "alpha male". Softer feelings and emotions are seen as a weakness and as such i keep them well hidden!


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

YES!!!!!
I am very much an average male with an average males wants and desires. It's just the c/ding that can make me appear differantly.

[Freddy12]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

4) Yes, I listen to my SO. She does not want to know about my CD activities, and I hide them. It just "doesn't do anything for" her.

5) I DO express my softer feelings in male mode. I just express them more often in female mode.

6) YES YES YES YES! Did I make that clear? TES. I notice women MORE now!

[Jonianne]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes, very much. But, there have been times when a 2x4 would have worked better.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

As I am in male mode 98% of the time, it's my emotional side that is 98% female and I do tend to express my softer feelings while in male mode.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I almost just said "yes" to this question, but I guess it may depend on the personality of who you are comparing to. I've been a cd all my life so I don't really know what a non-CD likes, other than what I have seen and what is portrayed. Sexually, I am very conservative in my likes and dislikes. I have never been turned on by the extremely feminine, skimpy type behaviour or cloths (overtly sexual behaviour). I have never had a desire for the strip or night club life. For me that has been a "turn off", and I know sometimes people think I am gay because of that. But it's just that my taste in what I find sexy in women is not what is portrayed as what average males want. And, from being here on this forum, I don't think being a cd has anything to do with it at all. I think it just has to do with personality.

[Shari]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Most of the time I am wide open and willing to listen. There are still moments when I am involved with something to where it is a difficult task. However, I think I'm more open than most men.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I feel I can express myself at times in male mode, but I still find myself suppressing most of my more sensitive emotions. An ingrained response or lack of it I suppose that I'll always carry as an innate part of me.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?[/QUOTE]
Is the pope Catholic? Does a bear s**t in the woods? I adore women and have always been sexually attracted by the opposite sex. There isn't a pair of heels or sexy dress that's ever going to change that.

[JackieInPA]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I do listen to her and i do my best to ease those worries.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I do, but only becasue i don't really give a damn what people think about it. Most of the time for a man to do so gets him labeled and gay, weak, girly, etc.



6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

No i am not...i am much more respectful. I would never poke a buddy and say "look at the tits on that one!" I find such behaviour awful.

[stephanie100]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

not applicable as i live alone.



5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I dont think my feeling change they always have been softer than most males.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
the answear to that is yes I never had complants.

[msniki48]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries? Absolutely! Now that i know who I am. I can now somewhat explain it, and I listen to her supportive comments and her concerns. I admit I don't always have the answer, but I listen and try to find some common ground for both of us to accept

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

This is a tough one for me... I have always felt the need to over compensate for my softer side...every time i let it creep out in front of men i got critisized... even in front of my mother ... i got [ be a man] It wasn't till i found i was transgendered at 48 yrs old that the light went on!!! I have no problem showing my softer side now, at least in front of women... i however, put my guard up around men still... if i sence that testosterone from them. Still trying to find center i guess.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?


I think I look at women in a different light than a typical man. [ at least the ones I know] I look at the whole person, and yes I love women! I don't see myself objectifying them in any way. I tend to walk away from that kind of banter from guys... [ Hey! would ya do her?] stuff like that.

I have several women on the block coming over for wine etc. to get my take on different things in their lives...they see me as one of the girls..at least i hope so.:battingeyelashes:

Di, Thanks for making me think.:hugs:

[gabimartini]

4. I'd like to think so.

5. I can, and I do express my feelings, regardless of how I'm dressed.

6. I'm attracted to women like any heterosexual male, CDer or not.

[Renelle]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I don't have an SO, but I think I'm above average at listening and remembering what women say. It's been my experience that women really don't give men much credit for this. When I try to accomodate them, they just demand more.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I think I could, I just don't get many opportunities. Male life is about confrontation, competition, and bravado.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I don't think so. With my buddies, it's always about T and A (mostly T). For me, a well dressed woman is much sexier than a naked one. Maybe because I grew up with Sear's catalogs? I don't know. I've always admired women for their completeness. "Something in the way she moves" is how George Harrison once put it.

[Babette]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Absolutely yes! Everyone needs a sounding board - a best friend - someone who really cares - a guardian of hope - a person who will stand by them with unconditional love and support.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

To the opposite, I don't feel that way at all.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I going to presume how the universe of non-CD males would be and say yes.

Babette

[anna kate]

I listen all the time, don't know if I hear all the time.

In my male upbringing, was taught to be tough (which I'm not). Boys don't cry sort of thing. When my fem side gets loose, the relief of being able to express my feelings, is a pleasant escape from "malehood". After a lot of years, this (expressing my feelings) is spilling over into my male side and I like it.

Been a CD as long as I can remember, but yes I love women, especially my wife. Look at women more now, thinking, "wish I could wear what she's wearing". Sexually, my wife of 44 years, is the only woman I'm interested in.

[Shelly Preston]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes I do Although she wont always agree I'm listening


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I do express these qualities most of the time but not always It can depend on who is involved in the situation


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Yes, and beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes

[Joanne f]

4
I assume you mean it towards the dressing in which case it does not really apply to me as she has no worries or concerns.

5
It makes no difference in which way i am dressed just that when dressed i would be doing more relaxing things so would have more time to show it .


6
Difficult to answer as i have always been this way so would not know how to judge that but i would be inclined to say yes. But (always that but) there are times when i wonder if it is always the female or the desire to be the female that turns me on .
I don`t think that i have been entirely honest with my answer and it is bugging me , the desire to be that female far out weighs any other thought:sad:

[joandher]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes 100% but wether i act upon it is anouther mater

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I do express my softer side to wife all the time and she says i am dead sloppy

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Easy one this 200% PURE HETRO ,and if GOD made anything better he's keeping it to himself
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[Connie D50]

4. That is a hard question after 32 years I think I do. However I'm still not sure we r on the same page 100%.

5. I do feel I can express my fem traits when in male mode. I don't see how you can't.

6. Yes I am, However I do look at all women some just attracted to what cloths-make up-shoes--Hair they wear and how they wear them.

[sometimes_miss]

4. Again, no SO.

5. I can, so there's no conflict there.

6. How exactly can we ever know how another person feels when getting turned on? I don't think there's any accurate way to answer that question.

[Tomara]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know

The second set of questions our GG's would like to ask to promote better understanding. We've put the questions together and will be posting them in sets of three every week. Please feel free to answer any number of them. We appreciate your input!

Here's the link to the Week 1 questions for those of you who missed them and would like to participate: Week 1 Questions (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2121858#post2121858)


Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

4- Yes I do listen to my SO and I address all of her concerns and worries with honest and complete answers to the best of my ability.

5- I do express the same softer feelings whether I'm cross-dressed or not , it's who I am.

6- I believe I am , but I never asked a non-CD male that question.

Tomara

[Tina B.]

1. Yes
2. I can
3. Yes
Tina B.

[Diana L]

4. Yes, in fact we have a written agreement that outlines the boundaries of my activities as Diana. It covers how often I dress, the seasons I dress ( I don't dress during the summer), and a couple other things. I never cross these boundaries. We have had it for several years and it works well.

5. I work hard at listening to her concerns and worries. Her major worry is the neighbors. I also do a lot around the house to help keep things running smoothly.

6. I have always been attracted to women and I don't think my dressing affects it.

Diana

[Farrah]

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Question 5 is easy. As a male child you were always taught to be rough and rugged and not show signs of weakness. Usually when males show softer feelings, we are viewed as weak or gay....No straight male wants that rumor going around about him, even though he does where dresses secretly.

Question 6: I dont think i'm turned on exactly the same way as non cd males. Non cd males do not admire the woman as a whole. As a cd, I admire everything about the woman, not just her physique. I notice how her clothes are put together, her makeup, and the way carries herself.

[mapletree]

re week 2

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes we speak often

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Often I can express my feelings I just sometimes feel as if they are not the only way to communicate or necessarily the only best way to communiucate


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
I am a cross dresser and I find women sexually attractive so yes

[Rianna Humble]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

If I had an SO, I would certainly want to listen to her concerns actively and try to work through them with her.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

My old self has a reputation for empathy, sensitivity and consideration, he gets it from me. "In male mode", I am more likely to be treated like a big brother come confidant than a potential mate because of this.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Even when I was fighting my true nature, I was rarely "turned on sexually" by a woman. I was much more likely to want to get to know her and become a trusted friend. Now, I am just as likely to want to know where she got her outfits.

[Michelle I]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
When she was alive, I would listen and try to ease the concerns. But if you would be able to ask her, she would probably say that the male side did not listen most of the time. I tried but did not always connect correctly.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
Since I have retired from a very "male dominated" career where softer feels would get you hurt or killed, I have been able to express my softer feelings. It has been hard to let go of the macho side but boy when I do I feel much better.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Since I am not a non-CD male I dont know, I look at women and see the clothing, the hair, the way she presents herself, I am not looking at a sex object but a person.

[hotskirt]

#4 Yes we talk about everyday situations and discuss how to solve problems.
#5 It's easier doing it in a girl mode
#6 Yes. Girls always turn me on

[Sophie_C]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

No SO. Not applicable.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Severe negative reaction by virtually all men and women. Simple as that.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Probably not, although I do suspect that I'm a straight TG, or at least bi (not as much into women). There's always been more of an envy than a raw animal attraction there. Maybe that's all it's always been.

[TGMarla]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

This is not much of an issue in my home, since crossdressing is not an issue that we really ever talk about. I'm sure she has wrestled with some of these issues, but I keep my femme side pretty much under wraps, and rarely go out anywhere. Out of respect for her, I try very hard to be careful with my cross-gender activities.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Likely this is due to my programming from growing up in an America that virtually prohibits men from acting outside the macho box that has been constructed around the accepted male behavior pattern in Western society. Subliminally, we fear that other men will see us as inferior, effeminate, limp-wristed, gay, and subject to ridicule. It's a shame.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

It's difficult to have a frame of reference, since I've never known what it's like to be a non-CD male. However, I'll say this: I am attracted sexually to women in the same way that any normal heterosexual male is. But in addition to that, I also notice, am attracted to, and am more positively sensitive to things like her appearance, her clothing choices, her makeup, her hair, her jewelry, etc. I have a greater empathy for her as a feminine being than do most men, and I feel this gives me an even greater appreciation of her as a woman.

[StephanieDragg]

4 yes

5 I can easily express my softer emotions no matter what I am wearing

6 Yes I adore women, I think I probably have a better understanding of them than non-cders

[WendyH]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Absolutely. Though having been trained as a male to try to "fix" everything, I have to make a conscious effort to shut up and just listen.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I can express those feelings in male mode, though it's hard as it goes against my cultural upbringing as a male in the American South. In some circles, primarily at work, it is socially risky to express softer feelings as these are not considered "manly" by some and are ridiculed by the more insecure males. It is somewhat easier to express those things in female mode, but that's not the reason I crossdress.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Never having been a non-CD male, I don't know. I'm not sure there is a "normal" way to be turned on. I'm attracted to/by particular women, not all women. In other words, I have my criteria for what I find sexually attractive, just like anyone else.

[Emily L]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know

The second set of questions our GG's would like to ask to promote better understanding. We've put the questions together and will be posting them in sets of three every week. Please feel free to answer any number of them. We appreciate your input!

Here's the link to the Week 1 questions for those of you who missed them and would like to participate: Week 1 Questions (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=2121858#post2121858)


Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?


4) Yes I do. I may not always reach the same conclusion that she does, but I am pretty satisfied that she knows that I am listening to what she has to say.

5) I think I can express my softer feelings no matter how I am presenting. Yes, of course I have acted macho at points when in male mode, but that doesn't mean that access to the gentler emotions only comes while dressed. My most emotional moments with my wife have been all while I was in male mode.

6) Not living inside another person's head, I can't answer that with 100% confidence, but I would think so - I am definitely very physically and sexually attracted to any good-looking women (who can come in many shapes and sizes). And if she's wearing attractive clothing, so much the better. :)

[docrobbysherry]

Whatever that means!:brolleyes:

4. No SO.

5. I'm always the same, no matter how I'm dressed. I WISH I felt and acted more fem when dressed, but I don't!

6. THIS ONE I GOT!:devil:
After all, I was a non-CD male for over 50 years!:eek: I'm probably MORE turned on by the finer aspects of a GG's look now, than I was back when.
( Glad u didn't ask about "performance", tho!):o

[Tina Dixon]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Yes I do, but my SO just don't let thing bug her.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I have been told I don't have feelings, but just me both ways.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
It don'y matter what I'm wearing, a sexy women is still a turn on!

[CherryZips]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Is this not more of a heartfelt request?

As in "Please listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries."

I feel for those involved.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

As others have said. This is an obvious one. In general men cannot express feminine traits and expect to continue their role in the community. Careers, relationships and family problems can be expected.

I'd say effeminate gay men face more prejudice than macho gay men.

Also the average woman does not appreciate femnine man.

Most of the crossdressers here probably started out with feminine traits that they learned to hide early on and have perhaps found a lifestyle in which they are free to express them. And good for them.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I certainly hope not.

But then I don't want the average woman.

[Andrea Reynolds]

4.Yes I do listen, when she is making sense and not just nit-picking trivial matters.
5.Social standards. However, I am pushing this one aside as rapidly as I can.
6.Yes. Actually, I admire others of both sexes equally and respectfully (with only a little bit of ogling). Andrea

[Veronica Nowakowski]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

No SO to listen to.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

In general, that will get you thrown in jail. I still remember a professor explaining how if a child falls and scrapes their knee, a teacher picks her up and pats her on the back saying "poor baby," there's a completely different reaction if it's a male or female teacher among society at large. It's just great if the teacher is female, she's a good, caring teacher. If the teacher is male, he's a sicko and a pervert.

However, I don't think that the emotional expression is the only issue with dressing up. It is a part of who you really are, and different people have different levels of preference in having a female body. You have those who get excited, those who feel more comfortable, and those who want to just chop it off. It's about showing yourself to the world, and, of course, it is easier to show that emotional side if you're showing your true self all around.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Have you ever seen a lesbian? Heard of one? Yes, the attraction's going to be the same if you have it. If your SO is a crossdresser, there's no reason to believe they are not physically attracted to you. There's still testosterone pumping through them th'ar veins after all.

However, that does not mean I view a woman differently than a non-transgendered man. Most men think of women as physical conquests, and even married men focus on the physical in the bedroom. With transgendered women (still biological men), it is much more emotional. When I lost my virginity, it felt like a spiritual experience to me.

I've also always had different tastes in women than most men. I found many women that were passed over by other men as attractive and never cared for the bleach blonde bimbo with huge tits. I've also really been affected by what a woman wears, so I imagine you won't be able to dress down as much in front of a transgendered SO, but neither will they.

[Roxi Loh]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries? I do and I have changed plans when she showed a concern.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode? I do and I think that is what she appreciates about my dressing.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is? I am very turned on by women despite what kind of plumbing they have.

[Di]

Thank you so much:bighug2: keep em coming ladies/

[Fab Karen]

Maybe the titles should reflect: for those with a female SO.

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
once again, don't have one. If I had a female partner I would listen & discuss it.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
Wow- what's with this assumption?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Seems kinda vague & general- if we throw out EXACTLY, yes. I'm pansexual.

[BRANDYJ]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Yes, I do. I am always very aware of her concerns and what's on her mind. I can honestly say I put her concerns or worries before my own.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I have no problem expressing my softer side in either mode. Those traits don't change with my mode of dress or presentation. They are part of me always.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
I don't think so. I think I am much more turned on by women
any non-CD male could ever be. I think I see women as more beautiful,
more erotic, more sensual, and desirable then those men that have not felt their own feminine side or even acknowledged it's existence.

[sherri52]

#4 When married I listened to my wife but CD'ing was not an issue during the marriage only at the end of it.
#5 I can be sensitive around women while in drab but around men it is a sign of weakness and I try to act like one of them. OK so it doesn't always work
#6 A beautiful woman is a beautiful woman, And I look at them the same in both modes

[suchacutie]

4) I sure hope so!! We have been in this together from the beginning (5 years) and I can't imagine doing anything to hurt her support or her love, so meaningful 2-way communication is a must!

5) Who says I can't express my softer feelings as a male. I did for 55 years before we knew about Tina. What I didn't understand was that Tina was an identifiable part of me that we can now explore separately. We can even go farther and really discuss what it's like to be feminine, grow up feminine, and how girls act together! It's just better communication!

6) I've been on both sides of this was only in male mode for 55 years and my feelings for my wife have never diminished, including the last 5 years knowing Tina!

[girlygirl152]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Definetly, I love and respect her and listen to everything she has to say.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I have no problem expressing my feelings with her under any circumstance. we always talk to each other about how we feel. I believe thats why we are so strongly connected

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
without a doubt.

[Di]

Really appreciate everyone joining in.:D

[CharlotteB]

4) Yes I think I do.
5) The softness spills over to the my male side I think and hope.
6) Absolutely the same, except if she wears a lovely nightie to bed I might be a little envious and imagine trying it on.

[Mary Jane]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries? Yes, very much so.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode? I have never tried to hide my sensitivity when around others. I have always been that way and could not hide it.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is? Of course, after all I AM a male.

[zoe m]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

4) I try to in general, though we all tend to forget to do that sometimes or we space out while the other person is talking. If you mean concerns/worries about CD issues, well, my SO has only known about it since about a week and a half ago when I told her (we've been together for a year and a half). She didn't have a lot of concerns/worries, in fact she was really positive about it, kind of accepting and intrigued at the same time. She did ask "so what comes next?" and I wasn't sure what to answer, it's not like she's seeing the CDing right now since we live in different towns, I had to travel 8 hours just to tell her. Maybe she'll have more concerns in the next few weeks.

5) I think I do tend to express all 3 when I'm in male mode, esp. empathy, maybe a bit less the other two. I don't feel uncomfortable expressing those as a man, whether I succeed is not for me to answer. For me crossdressing is not about those 3 emotions but more about beauty and mistery - that's at the conscious level, of course a lot of it is at the subconscious level too. I have been told by women that I'm too rational and analytical, but I think that happens also when I'm in "female" mode, my personality doesn't really change, only the superficial expression of it.

6) Hard to know what others feel, but I would be inclined to say yes. I don't like to go around beating my chest and saying "I'm heterosexual", because I think that reinforces heteronormativity, and in any case I don't think even heterosexual crossdressers are "regular" heterosexual men. But the fact remains that throughout my life I've been attracted to women almost exclusively, I'm not at all opposed to homosexual sex and I'd like to think that in principle everyone is at least somewhat bi, but it's just never really happened for me. Since I was a kid, before I knew what sex was, I've liked girls, the way they looked at me, as a teenager I began to be attracted to them, at the age of 17 I began to date. I had several relationships and I experienced the things I assume "normal" heterosexual men feel - attraction, infatuation, being upset when getting rejected, etc. And I haven't often even thought about crossdressing when being with a woman, only very few times. All this would often lead me to a state of denial about the crossdressing and to assume that I was just a regular guy. And yet in spite of all of the above, I had this whole other fantasy world that seemed unacceptable and that would come and go. I sometimes think of it as having two parallel sexualities, that are probably somewhat linked at some unconscious level but at the conscious level seem separate. Both crossdressing and interpersonal attraction have a sexual and a non-sexual component. The sexual part of crossdressing is not really about being attracted to "the woman in the mirror" as seemed to be implied in question 3 (in the last set), it's more about being turned on by a state of mind and of being, to which the clothes are accessories.

I think on a purely sexual level I could be attracted to many kinds of women, including the very feminine women that form the "ideal" in society, but in practice I've always tended to be more attractive to women who were at least a bit androgynous, rebellious and non-conforming. Maybe because I felt closer spiritually to them due to my own issues. I'm also a bit androgynous even in male mode - I have a small body, and my attitude is not super macho, I've been told I'm more ying than yang (though I forget which one is which).

Sorry for rambling. All of the above applies only to my own experience and thoughts and is not meant to represent other crossdressers.

[SherriePall]

4. Do I really listen to my wife when she expresses her concerns/worries?

I like to think that I do. I imagine that sometimes I may not say exactly the right thing, but I try to listen.

5. Why do you feel you cannot express your softer side when in male mode?

Assuming that I cannot, it is probably because of the way I was brought up by every external influence imaginable. Parents, relatives, neighbors, television, friends, the military, etc.

6. Am I sexually turned on by a woman in the same way as a non-CD'er is?

And this question, Di, is worth the price of admission. No, I believe that I am not.
Some have touched on this, but I believe I am not. Magazines touting the wonder and beauty of the female naked body apparently do not do as much for me as my friends who, I believe, are not CD'ers. They undress woman while I "dress" them.
I much more prefer the female body with clothing on. The soft curve of hips accented by a cute skirt, dress, or pants. Breasts slightly hidden beneath a lovely top. A bum tightly caressing that skirt, dress, or pants.
A leg peeking or fully showing above a nice pair of pumps, strappies, or flats.
A face with some make-up or totally done -- with a warm smile.
Hair, well kept and styled.

Plus, from my advantage, I also find that how a woman relates to others, how she treats others to also be stimulating.

[Sarah Doepner]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I really try. My biggest problem is when I focus on something I tend to tune everything out, including her. All too often this is when she wants to share and it takes a bit to bring my focus back to where it should be. I believe we share a lot of the same concerns and worries after 35 years, so I do have a bit of a leg up there. Sometimes I do get a little bogged down on the details and I think that's my "Y" chromosome beginning to filter the conversation. It's that time when I have to give myself a little whack on the head to get priorities back where they belong.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Who said I can't? It you talk to our children, now all adults, you will probably find that I was the one doing the nurturing and taking the softer approach much of the time.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I don't know for sure, but probably not. I can share much of what my buddies and guys I worked with had to say, but my take on women is (I hope) much more nuanced than theirs. I pay a lot more attention to the details of women, what they wear, their hair, makeup and accessories than my friends, I do know that. While they know all the Internet porn sites, I've visited once and never returned. Those sites offend me in how they exploit and reduce the image of women and the relationship men have with them. That isn't to say I don't like the look of a womans naked body, it's without comparison and very attractive sexually. It just should be handled with a lot more respect than a lot of men seem to be able to muster up.

[johnboy23]

Im always in male mode. I still listen like a male.

I still get turned on by the same things non cd guys do. I don't get turned on but I look at girls the same way gg's do.

[Rachel Morley]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
You bet I do. Her happiness is my happiness. Also, I'd like to think that when I listen, I actually listen to what she is really saying (without interrupting her) and without rushing to "fix it" like most guys do. She wants my empathy, and support first, the fixing can come second.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I don't think this question applies to me. Expressing my softer feelings and especially my emotions is one of the things my wife told me she was most attracted to when she first got to know me.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Humm ... not sure. I do have a slight problem (if it is a problem) in that I have no great desire to have sex with just anyone. I have to either be in love with them or have very strong feelings for her before I feel comfortable enough to want to go that far. I don't think that's typical in a non-CD male, at least that's to say, not the one's I know.

[Renee_E]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes. I always have.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I always have let my softer side show. Never could pull of the macho act effectively.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I guess so. I have never been a non-CD male so I can't compare effectively.

[bredalee25]

1 of course I listen because I LOVE her with all my heart

2 The male is looked apon in society as the butch male not the butchette male we would be thought of as being weak and sissyfied.

3 I would'nt know i've never been a nonCD male

[TxKimberly]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
I'm sorry - we're you saying something? Just kidding - stop yer yelling. Of course I listen to her. I've gotta listen to her so that I know when she is done yapping and I can start telling her about my vastly more important and interesting day.




5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Tsk tsk - that question paints us all with the same brush and assumes that we all feel that way - I don't. I am the same person whether dressed as male or female. My feelings nor my expression of them change based on my attire. I will tell you that I love you just as quickly in male as in female mode. I will also be just as big a jerk when I am wearing a skirt as I would be otherwise. People who think of themselves as two different individuals sort of weird me out . . .


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

The question assumes we know what turns on your average "normal" male. Still, I would have to say that I don't think it is quite the same for me.
I think most men can't wait to get the woman out of her clothes and do what comes naturally and I would be much happier (and turned on *blush*) if she were wearing something sexy or pretty. Unlike what I think your average guy would like, I'd rather have the prom queen IN her gown than out of it. :D
And for those of you who are cynical, it's not necessarily the clothes that are the turn on, though that is a factor. It's more the combination of someone I find in attractive in something I find attractive. This irritates my wife because it makes her feel like it is not her that turns me on, but the clothes, but in the end it's not something I can change. I can't help what turns me on any more than I can help going bald or getting old. It is what it is . . .

[Petra Bellejambes]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

She has not expressed concerns as such. She did quite pointedly indicate the first time she saw me dressed that she did not have lesbian tendencies. I listened closely, and do not try to introduce a different lover / bedmate than the one she married.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I do not feel that way. I have been happy finding out how integral these things are to me, and deploying them in all aspects of my days. Cross Dressing has made my access to those characteristics easier.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

O god yes. Except I probably notice details of style, movement, carriage, accessorizing, setting appropriateness, skill in the application of make up, and the O so powerful deployment of beautiful feminine guile, charm, seduction and etc....

Women are so much more interesting than fellows are you know... :)

[StacyCD]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Of course, listening to my SO has nothing to do with being a crossdresser and it has everything to do with being a good spouse.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Who says that I can't/don't. I like don't think my 'softer' side only comes out when I'm wearing a dress.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I appreciate a well-dressed woman probably as much as the next heterosexual crossdresser. Yesterday, I saw a woman wearing stratospheric stilettos and I found myself staring at her/them. I was torn between the idea of going over and doing her right there or asking where she got the shoes. What a dilemma!

[Samantha_Smile]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I try my hardest. Work and a busy life causing fatigue usually strain my ability to nail it 100% of the time though :sad:

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I've not got to the bottom of this yet. All I know is that 'dressing makes me feel softer and more sensitive from the second Ive got a bra on.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Very much so. Have no interest in men.
Men just arent sexy.

[Jenniferpl]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I do my best. Perhaps the best person to ask would be my wife.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I have no problems with that.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Hard to answer. I love everything about woman and I support them when I can. They are an ammazing creature. They have the power and ability to bring out the best in us and make us do crazy things just to be around them.
Life would be boring without them.

[Tess]

4. Yes, I listen very closely to my SO. It didn't come naturally, but missing some important messages over the years have trained me to pay attention...if she has an issue it is important.

5. I think I'm sensitive in male mode but I'd have to mark myself as "needs improvement". I say that because one of my adult daughters commented that I don't say "I love you" enough to them. Its a work in progress.

6. Speaking from long experience, my sexual preferences and cross dressing are unrelated to each other. You either like women or men or both, but cross dressing has nothing to do with it.

[minalost]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes. Absolutly.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Tried that, got beat up. This was way back in my school days. Learned NOT to express anything soft or "feminine" in male mode, and it's a darn hard habit to break!

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

I assume so. That being said, I find a well dressed woman much more attractive and sexually appealing than a naked woman. Never been into porn like some people I know. NOT physically/sexually attracted to men, naked or other wise.
:hugs:

[MissKara]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Of course, but we talk and thats about it because I am not going to change for someone else, I am only going to change myself for myself.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

A male who shows those emotions is usually rediculed and called gay, but as Kara I tend to feel like there is a shield around me. It's kind of hard to explain.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Yes, infact even more. But I do want to say (Because this is the first question everyone asks me): I am not gay. Just the simple act of thinking of being with another man makes me want to throw up.

Lots of Love,
Miss Kara

[Michaela42]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

4. Well, if she provides me the same courtesy.

5. I can, I just do it better in a dress and heels:battingeyelashes::battingeyelashes:

6. Appearance wise, sure. But to really get me revved up said woman better be able to speak about more than just fashion,reality TV:Angry3:, or anything else that is just noise. So, I guess what I am saying is that looks count, but brains are where its at, for me at least!

[eluuzion]

Week 2
4) If she raises her hand and waits for me to call on her before talking, then yes. :heehee: I am divorced now, but when married, I tried endlessly to communicate, but she never shared anything with me or anyone else. I was married two years before I knew what her favorite color was

5) I have always been told that I am one of the only males "they ever met" that did exactly that.

6) If you are referring to "physical aspects only", as in the typical "if you have the time, I have the beer", meaning anything that is available, no. I have been with probably way too many women in my life, lol...but I was never just into the physical only, without losing interest quickly. I always required a cognitive connection for real interest. Same is true today. So, not sure where you file that one.

[Lexine]

4) Yes, if they tell me. Communication is important in any relationship. When there is a breakdown in communication, then there's a huge problem.

5) I think for most people it's the fact that society does not allow for this. For me, I have no problems expressing this with a SO.

6) Most certainly yes!

[Teddie]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?[/Quote}
Yes. And, she listens to mine. Maybe it's why we get along so well.

[quote]5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I can express it and do.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Maybe. I love women for who they are. Do non-CD males feel the same way?

[pj]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?Oh yeah. They are very important to me. But then they always have been.


5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?I can say that when I was in hiding I didn't want to give any kind of outward sign of femininity. But I think now that I am out there, or as out there as I'm going to be, I am more empathetic and sensitive all the time.


6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?Yes. Well, I can't speak for non-CD men, but I think I love women more than they do.

[Raychel]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes, I really do listen, She may not think so, But I do listen. I always do my best to solve any issues that she may be concerned or worried about. Not always to her total satisfaction, But I do my best.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I don't think that I am any differant person, no matter how I am dressed. Softer feeling aren't really changed that I know of.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

OH YEA

[AmandaM]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Yes, always.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

It seems like the male inside is at polar opposites to the female inside. Getting these feelings out "all the time" when in male mode is a chore. I would say I'm more of these things in male mode than other guys though.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

When I see a hot girl, my first thought is sexual, then the secondary thought of wanting to be her comes up. My desire is usually to be the submissive one to her, not just take her like men do, though if that's the only way, I'm game.

[flatlander_48]

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Yes, I try to.
5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I like to think that I'm pretty consistent regardless of how I am dressed.
6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
Yes, I think so.

[Sally24]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Absolutely! The hard part is getting her to talk, rather than saying everything is fine.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

Not applicable in my case. I've always been a sensitive 70's kind of man. I cry at movies and don't have a problem with sharing my feelings. I'm a hugger and find many men of my generation are the same.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Hard to say since I don't live in their skin. I think I appreciate, and observe the finer touches of femininity much more than your average male. I've never thought naked pictures were all that attractive. I much prefer pictures of women with clothing and accessories that bolster and compliment their beauty. I think we TG are probably all about the details whereas your average guy may be more into the broad picture. And of course there is the whole envy thing working within us.

[corrinediane]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Yes! The problem was the other side of that road. I never got the concern and the ear when I needed it. Perhaps it was the fear of the CDing being brought up.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
Not really sure but I think it's because as a male we need to be strong and expressing those feelings is not what society has envisioned for us.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?I can only speak for myself as a CDing male. I am turned on by women but idk if it's the same way a non CDing male is.

[Michaela42]

4. Well, I am currently single now, but when I was with a SO yes I feel that I did my very best to listen and understand.

5. Part of it is trying to hide Makaila from the rest of the world. As I have gotten older and cared less about what other people think about me I have expressed those feelings more often in male mode.

6. That is a joke right? Sure, I can admit when a guy is good looking but sexually they do nothing for me. Now an attractive woman who is intelligent and independent . . . I am just your typical male in those situations :devil:

[RozalynLove]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

I currently do not have a SO, but I feel it is very important to carefully listen to any worries or concerns that the people you care about have. It is vital to understanding the person's feelings on whatever the subject may be, and to be in the position where you can attempt to help them by either by explaining to them why you think their worries and concerns are unjustified, or by realizing that they are justified and attempting to change the aspects of you which cause them. Although, I have come across women who believed they were not being listened to because my opinion did not change after they had explained how they felt, and that's just ridiculous logic which I believe probably comes from them being so convinced that their opinion is the right one, that they are completely ignorant to someone else possibly being able to have a different opinion on the matter.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I can, it's that the person asking this question, as well as being incredibility sexist in thinking all men are the same, is ignorant to the many different reasons that make men enjoy cross dressing.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Yes, I am attracted to women in the same was as any other heterosexual male.

[giuseppina]

Thank you to all that gave their time and help with our first set of questions.:love:


Inquiring Minds Want To Know
...

Week 2
4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?
Don't have an SO.

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?
I've had a lot of problems with disrespectful responses when I try. This isn't confined to expressing feelings. :sad:

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?
For a long time I have been closed to the idea of a relationship with anyone and have had this part of me turned off, but yes, I am attracted to genetic ladies.

[JulieK1980]

4) Do you really listen to your SO when she tells you about her concerns/worries?

Of course! :)

5) Why do you feel you cannot express your softer feelings (empathy, nurture, sensitivity) in male mode?

I can and do express them.

6) Are you turned on sexually by women in the same way that a non-CD male is?

Not being a non-CD male, I can't honestly answer that. Hard to say definitively without the experience of not desiring to Cross-dress. I think its the same, but that's sort of akin to saying I think I can imagine the pain of child-birth, I'll never experience it, and thus, really can't relate at all.