Bathroom protocol...In a gay club?

[~Seana~]

I'll be off in montreal this weekend with a Tgirl friend and part of the plan is to visit some of the clubs along St Catherines en femme , and I know generally use the one of the gender you're representing, but does that differ at all in gay clubs?The one in particular I'm thinking of going off to has as much lesbian patrons as male gay if that makes a difference.

Amanda

[Dee Dee Gee]

Erm, somebody please reply to this thread for me !

I'm new and will be popping out "dressed" tomorrow night and would like to know the "general rule" on which washroom to go to !!

[AllieSF]

Since Montreal is such a cosmopolitan city and open to our community, I would just ask the bartender, waitress or waiter. Don't be shy.

[sherri52]

I always use the room to which I am dressed. Doesn't matter where I am

[Katesback]

I think they have porta johns in the alleys specifically for trans people!!

Ok sooooooooo.............umm are you going to to go the bathroom standing up? Might be a good idea to use the mens.

On the other hand if you are going to go to the bathroom like a lady and you look like a lady............do you think it would be appropriate to go to the mens room?????????


Katie

[t-girlxsophie]

Never found it an issue in any Gay Club I have been in,Just use the toilet of whatever side of you is being presented,and I would be very suprised If anyone had an objection

[Dorisnycd]

im gay...gender doesn't ever matter in a gay club. They may be marked, but lots of times they are not gender specific. Even if they are, go into the girls, or use a stall in mens, it doesn't matter at all.

[tricia_uktv]

Hi hon,

Use the ladies. If you stand up remember to put the seat back down - and make sure you are tucked again afterwards :)

Have fun

[Toni_Lynn]

My advice is go for the ladies. About 10 years ago I got some schtick at a halloween party that the local CD group had at local gay bar from one of the GGs for using the ladies. Gave her a strong frown of disapproval of her reaction, made a hand gesture referencing what I was wearing and then moved on.

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[sandra-leigh]

In Winnipeg, there are two gay clubs, across the alley from each other. At one, the regulars don't blink twice at either sex or any gender or presentation going into either rest-room, and if it is busier, it is common for GGs to go into which-ever one has the shorter line-up. I only once heard a GG grumble about it, but it was only a grumble and not a "pointedly raised voice" and not said to any of the gender-enhanced folk who had gone into the room without the urinals. The staff and management there wouldn't dream of suggesting that anyone should use any particular restroom in order to make someone else comfortable, and have emphasized to us that if anyone should ever bother us for being as we are, that the other person would be invited to choose between re-thinking and departing.

I have not been to the other club very often. I did once overhear a couple of male customers laughing at the cross-dressers, which I have never encountered at the other club. The staff and management there has never given me any problem, but they also have not given me any enthusiasm. I can say, though, that when I was working the door and coatroom there once for an event, the staff was quite attentive when I signaled that I was having trouble with someone. I have had more than one CD or TS person tell me that they have not had any trouble from the staff at that second club -- but yes, it does have a different feel to it.

I do not think that you can entirely predict the "feel" of a club or the staff or customers just by knowing that it is a "gay" club or a "lesbian" club. Some lesbian clubs discourage even gay male customers, because they want to feel like "sanctuaries" to the women; others encourage anyone to visit under the theory that the visitors are implicitly indicating acceptance and support for their core clients.

[Vickie_CDTV]

If you are not legally female/transitioning, and you want to be sure to avoid any possible trouble, ask the management which one you should use (and use it.)

At the local gay place, they ask those who are not legally female/transitioning to use the men's room. I do ask they ask, it is clean and physically safe so I have no problem doing as they wish.

[Tranny Tee]

If there are other crossdressers hold it as long as you can and see where they go. Many gay bars have no gender indication on the restrooms, you simply use which ever one is available. Be careful, it is considered bad form to go into a single stall bathroom with more than four other people.

[Annette_boy]

My Fave gay club here in Baltimore recently made all rooms unisex the signs just say "Restroom" Now days.Makes life easier all round.
Hugs and Kisses
Annette

[TxKimberly]

I've ALWAYS used the female bathrooms - ESPECIALLY in gay bars.'
If you are worried about it, you might consider asking the bartender as someone else suggested, but in 15 years of doing it, I've never received an unkind comment or dirty look.

[Diane Elizabeth]

I was at a gay bar in Minneapolis a few years ago, and they had kicked the guys out of the womens restroom. One was dressed. At another gay bar(heresay) the management kept a cd from using the womensroom. Minnesota is sooooo uptight. I always here how liberal Minnesotans are. Yet they are so phobic about GLBT type establishments. The best place for cd/tg to go is in St Paul.

[pamela_a]

This is exactly why I don't bother to go to gay clubs, nobody knows what to do. I always use the ladies room, no matter where I am, and I've never had a problem.

[Kerigirl2009]

I was so nervous about which restroom to use the last time I went out, I held it all night (5 hours) I kept checking over my shoulder to see if I could see which one to use. Never saw anyone go in or out of either bathroom. The first time I was there I was told to use the mens room so I did and as I was leaving a genuine girl went into the mens restroom and gave me a look of wtf. So I am still confused because I was told that last time to use the women room. So i have decided that I am going to use the room I am representing unless their is a unisex restroom available.

[Chickhe]

I think it depends what it has on the door... if it is a picture of someone wearing a dress and you have a dress on you use that one, if you match the one with pants use that one.

[carolinebrookes]

If I am presenting as a lady then I always use the ladies....even if it is a gay bar/club. Same in any place I happen to be. So far never had a problem......but if you are in doubt, then ask the staff.

[Terrihoney]

If you are dressed as a lady, why would you use anything other than the ladies room? And sit down! My local gay bar is not a large place. Two single use, unisex bathrooms.

Hugs, Terri

[Kaitlyn Michele]

dont worry about a thing..if its a younger crowd, there is gonna be all kinds of things going on in the bathrooms...

in the quieter clubs, i've seen mostly private bathrooms...and i would definitely knock before entering ..:heehee:

[JaytoJillian]

im gay...gender doesn't ever matter in a gay club. They may be marked, but lots of times they are not gender specific. Even if they are, go into the girls, or use a stall in mens, it doesn't matter at all.

I second what Doris wrote. Where I live, the correct toilet in such a club is the one not being used.

[ColbyInTx]

It doesn't matter whether it's a gay bar, straight bar, restaurant, or the mall, I use whichever bathroom correspondes with the gender I am presenting at the time. I have never had any problems or complaints using this formula.

[Jilmac]

The patrons at the gay clubs I have visited in Milwaukee have never had issues with me using the ladies room when I'm dressed. I've never been to Montreal but I'm guessing it will be the same there.

[tiffanyjo89]

I've heard from others (not from personal experience, I don't go to clubs) that people sometimes get so crazy at a club, that you'll see genetic women actually standing, yes, STANDING to pee. As well as people just flowing in and out of either restroom...

It's possible for women to stand to pee...if you want more info you'll have to Google it though.

[Lexine]

I'd go to the women's restroom. I dunno... call it female intuition ;)

[Veronica Nowakowski]

Someone may have already explained this...... but the one gay bar I went to was unisex bathrooms. Hell, segregating the sexes only increases the chance of sex in a gay club.

[Fab Karen]

im gay...gender doesn't ever matter in a gay club. They may be marked, but lots of times they are not gender specific. Even if they are, go into the girls, or use a stall in mens, it doesn't matter at all.

Yep, long before I accepted my dressing, I lived in the gay world(in boy mode), & in gay clubs/bars it was common to see both guys & girls( GG's ) in either restroom.

[olga]

I totally agree with the “unwritten rule” to use the matching bathroom of the gender you represent.

But what if I’m out and just wearing a dress, no wig, no make-up, and obviously not even trying to pass?

Any thoughts on this?


olga

[NathalieX66]

I go into the womens's room.
If they have a non-gender specific restroom, like a handicapped restroom, I'll use that.
I gurantee you a gay club will have no problem with CD/TG using women's room. That's been my experience.

[Kate Simmons]

It depends on the custom at the particular establishment. The easiest thing to do is ask.:)

[LeslieSD]

Years ago, I went to a club (that's somewhat gay oriented) in male mode with my gf. The bathroom is completely mixed. For example, I am totally in drab with my gf, and we used the lady's room. Nobody cares. Just lock your door when you do your business. I haven't been to clubs for years. But I think that's pretty much the way it is in those clubs. If you are not sure, just observe for a few minutes for the people who are in and out of the restrooms, and you will get the idea about what way it is there.

[Melissa Rose]

I've always use the women's restroom whenever out en femme. The stalls always had doors so you are not watching or being watched. I've never had an issue or snide comment. Your attitude and demeanor is also important so act appropriately. I will sit unless there is no one in the restroom and there is no chance of anyone seeing my feet. Some times I end up chatting with someone while waiting in line so many of the GGs don't seem to mind.

[Pikaxdresser]

Flip a coin heads- mens, tails- female. Seriously ask the bartender and see which one would be appropriate for the night. If they have a unisex bathroom then you should use it.

[Sammy777]

When I say "guys" I mean dressed as a guy
When I say "girls" I mean GG's, TS, CD, ect, ect.

General rule of thumb -mileage may vary-lol
[this goes for most any Str8/Gay bars/clubs]

"Boys" use the boys room, period.
"Girls" use the girls room, Unless it is crowed, lines to long or otherwise in use then they are free to use/invade the boys room. lol

Just please remember to sit down!
And that goes for the "boys" room too.
Nobody really wants to see you standing at a urinal with your skirt/dress all hiked up. :lol2: