Almost destroyed my sister's ball dress!

[Jessica Kelly]

About a week ago I was in the dressing mood and my sister's newly bought ball dress was to hand. Its a scarlet number which puffs out at the waist. As I was trying it on I could tell it was tight, but that hadn't ever stopped by before (no innuendos please), so I kept going. Got my arms in through the straps fine but really had to breath in, so I gave up.
As I was taking it off, I could tell it wouldn't be as easy as it was getting it on, and so I employed a "wriggle-a-little-and-slide-down" approach. It seemed to be working but then I heard a dreaded sound.
Fsst.
It had split ever so slightly at the waist and I panicked. Even worse, it felt like I was stuck - there was no way my technique would work without it ripping further. In addition to all this chaos, my parents were due home in ten minutes - Was this how I was going to come out to them? Trapped in my sister's ball dress?
Luckily, I tried the old "pull-up-from-the-bottom-and-lift-over-your-head" approach, which in the end worked fine (although did leave it creased to hell). I put everything back in it's place, went back into boy mode and tried to forget the whole ordeal as my parents came into the house...
Anyone had a similarly terrifying "stuck" or "splitting" experience? You'll know my pain :straightface:

Thanks for reading!
Jessica x

[Eve_WA]

Tsk tsk tsk!!!

Its always a bad idea to wear something of someone else's, without permission. And to damage it... and say nothing...

:Angry3:

such respect for your sister.

[Sheila]

I would say something, but what is the point, it will only result in hurt feelings & perhaps a closed thread :straightface:

But I will add that I think you know what you did was wrong, and in that case I am puzzled by why you posted what you did ?

[Stephanie Anne]

It would be only fair for her to ruin something of yours.

Oh and don't think for a moment that she won't notice.

[Eve_WA]

...so its the night of the 'big event'. Your sister goes to put on her brand new ball gown, and discovers a popped seam. Theres no time to get it repaired, and she cant go out like that. It could tear further, and create a real wardrobe malfunction. So she ends up dressing in an 'old gown' shed worn before...

...how do you think shed feel about her 'big night'.

if you cant fess up, and I understand that. Take the dress to a laundry, and have the seam fixed and the wrinkles taken out. Then put it back no one the wiser. But don't possibly ruin your sisters event.

[Blaire]

CD rule #2: Wear your own clothes!

[Engendered]

Wearing your own clothes is a good rule, but it is much harder for our younger members, who still live at home. Sisters regularly raid each other's closets growing up (if they're of a similar age), but obviously the dynamic is different here. I'd be shocked if there were any CDers who started young who only ever wore their own clothes. In fact, it's almost impossible.

Don't come down hard on Jessica. I think she was right to post this topic. If anything, it serves as a warning as to what can go wrong, especially for the young in our group who are facing similar situations. We all have had moral and ethical issues to deal with regarding our CDing in our lives, and these change as we get older.
:hugs: for the situation you found yourself in. Hopefully the damage to the dress isn't too noticable, and strive to build your own wardrobe as soon as is feasible. :) And be awesome towards your sister.

[JulieC]

CD rule #2: Wear your own clothes!

Amen to that. And #3, #4, #5 through to #100.

We seem to be getting a lot of these threads lately, of CDers wearing the clothes of other people without their permission.

[Deborah Jane]

Hi Jessica, you did wrong, I'm sure you realise that :sad:
But now do the right thing and get your sisters dress repaired, it's only fair on your sister that her dress be wearable for the event!

And learn from this, buy your own clothes, it's better for you and everyone concerned :)

[Eve_WA]

Wearing your own clothes is a good rule, but it is much harder for our younger members, who still live at home. Sisters regularly raid each other's closets growing up (if they're of a similar age), but obviously the dynamic is different here. I'd be shocked if there were any CDers who started young who only ever wore their own clothes. In fact, it's almost impossible.

I do completely understand. I too started very young. I stole plenty of my sisters clothes, as I was too ashamed and embarrassed to buy my own. I know where Jessica is coming from.

But her brand new ball gown? One that hadn't been worn for its' intended purpose yet?!? A gown like that, the first wearing is the most important, the most memorable. She probably spent months planning this first wearing, buying accessories and shoes to go with. Please fix the dress for her.

[Sheila]

Wearing your own clothes is a good rule, but it is much harder for our younger members, who still live at home. Sisters regularly raid each other's closets growing up (if they're of a similar age), but obviously the dynamic is different here. I'd be shocked if there were any CDers who started young who only ever wore their own clothes. In fact, it's almost impossible. .

We are not without inderstanding fo rher, but can I just point out it is sister's
newly bought ball dress BALL GOWN, not an ordinary skirt, not an ordinary dress, a ball gown, for a very special occasion, one would assume & she has been a member here since MAY 2009 so is not a new member, she may not post much, but i am sure she has seen threads like this in her 12 month membership and the advice is always get your own ............. thrift stores/charity shops/ jumble sales etc etc are cheap sources of clothing

Owwwwwwwwww and she is not her sisters sister & many sisters get into cat fights over clothes borrowed without permission :straightface:

[Mirani]

About a week ago I was in the dressing mood

Jessica, being in the mood doesn't excuse us from sensitivity to others property ...


As I was trying it on I could tell it was tight, but that hadn't ever stopped by before (no innuendos please), so I kept going.

Why didn't you stop when you knew the possibility of damage?

How do you feel ablout it now? Any sense of shame for abusing your sister's property? Any sense of responsibility? Any Lesson learned?

Regards,

[Stephenie S]

OK, don't come down too hard on her. Everyone does it.

Well, no. That doesn't make it right. Yes, everyone DOES start by borrowing someone else's something. But that doesn't make it right. And this was FAR more than borrowing someone's something. It was a gown, and IT WAS DAMAGED.

You have to have it repaired. And you may have to fess up. I hope not, but if that's the only way to get the gown from your sister, then you have to tell her. You have to take it to get cleaned and repaired. There is just NO other way. You don't have to tell your parents, but if there is no other way, just put on your big girl panties and TELL your sister that you tried it on because it was just so beautiful. And then actually DO take it to be cleaned and repaired.

Then, stay the heck out of other peoples closets. This is a pretty important lesson to learn and some never learn it. But really, it will stand you in good stead. Get your own things. Can't shop? Shop here. We have a VERY discrete store right here on this site. It couldn't be easier.

OK, 'nuff said. Do it.

Stephie

[Ze]

Ruining somebody else's brand new prom dress by wearing it without permission, and then hanging it back up and pretending nothing happened?

That is the sin of all sins in Lady Land, m'dear. The sin of all sins. :thumbsdn:

Find a way to get that thing fixed, cleaned, and pressed PRONTO. Prom dresses are expensive as hell and most women consider it one of the most important nights of their lives (at that time). She also probably spent a large amount of time picking it out. It could have just as well been dipped in chocolate-covered gold.

The devastation on the side of your sister could be epic. Seriously. Do you find that a fair trade?

If you absolutely have to say something, say you were messing around, knocked it on the ground, and stepped on it or something. You don't have to blatantly say you were trying it on.

Just get it fixed.

[SuzanneBender]

Why is your sister wearing a gown to play ball in? :heehee:

Like many have said before. Its a ball gown, a very special item to your sister. I would make sure it was repaired and ready for the big night. Two reasons:

1. Its the right thing to do.

2. If you don't and she notices her beautiful new dress is not in the condition it was when she tried it on at the shop you will have some explaining to do.....

To answer your orginal question I have been stuck in many a dress. We have a tendancy to want to wear the smallest size possible and the way a lot of dresses are made it means being stuck with your arms wedged to your body or over your head while you try not to panic and run around the room in terror.

Hang in there girl this is just one of those lessons that we learn in our youth. Enjoy the experience it only comes once.

[Emily L]

How much time is left before the event where she's wearing the dress?

I can't add too much but echoes of what everyone else has said - go get it fixed pronto, paying extra for a rushed job if you have to. And we've (almost) all of us borrowed other people's clothes to wear before, but it's always very very dangerous to try on a gown before the person who owns it has worn it once.

Good luck, hope everything turns out all right.

[Kieron Andrew]

Ruining somebody else's brand new prom dress by wearing it without permission, and then hanging it back up and pretending nothing happened?

That is the sin of all sins in Lady Land, m'dear. The sin of all sins. :thumbsdn:

Find a way to get that thing fixed, cleaned, and pressed PRONTO. Prom dresses are expensive as hell and most women consider it one of the most important nights of their lives (at that time). She also probably spent a large amount of time picking it out. It could have just as well been dipped in chocolate-covered gold.

The devastation on the side of your sister could be epic. Seriously. Do you find that a fair trade?

If you absolutely have to say something, say you were messing around, knocked it on the ground, and stepped on it or something. You don't have to blatantly say you were trying it on.

Just get it fixed.

Exactly, if she finds out, you would have just tarnished the lady's very important night, all for the sake of a selfish moment, bad move...get the dressed fixed, dry cleaned and pressed!

[danielle.cd]

i cant believe the bashing all of you are giving jessica, holy cow, i hope youve never been in a tuff situation before, further more what it sounds like to me a stich or two poped not runing the dress and fixable, the wrinkles should be taken care of though if thats all u have time to do i would attemp to fix what stitches did pop with some thread of mathing color, yes there have been times when ive wore some of my wifes clothes and she came home before she was supposed to and i was in a panic an she almost walked in on me when i was trying to losen her bra and it wouldnt undo.

[Kieron Andrew]

yes there have been times when ive wore some of my wifes clothes and she came home before she was supposed to and i was in a panic an she almost walked in on me when i was trying to losen her bra and it wouldnt undo.

This isn't just some slacks or a skirt or bra she just found by accident! this was a ball dress for a special significant moment!! not the same at all in anyway shape or form!! it was totally bad taste!

[Emily L]

i cant believe the bashing all of you are giving jessica, holy cow, i hope youve never been in a tuff situation before, further more what it sounds like to me a stich or two poped not runing the dress and fixable, the wrinkles should be taken care of though if thats all u have time to do i would attemp to fix what stitches did pop with some thread of mathing color, yes there have been times when ive wore some of my wifes clothes and she came home before she was supposed to and i was in a panic an she almost walked in on me when i was trying to losen her bra and it wouldnt undo.

All of us? Really? I see a few people bashing Jessica, but mainly I see good advice and a few admonishments, which is fair considering the situation.

I had assumed that Jessica wasn't good with sewing, as I figured she would have tried that herself if she were. But that's a possibility as well, Jessica, as long as you're comfortable enough with sewing to make sure the repair job won't show. It'll still need to go in to get pressed, though.

[giuseppina]

Sorry, Danielle, your line of reasoning doesn't cut it. Jessica did this to herself, and she will have to get the dress fixed forthwith and own up to her sister.


CD rule #2: Wear your own clothes!

Shouldn't this be Rule #1?

[Engendered]

Deep breaths everyone. :)
We don't know that there is any visible damage to the dress at all, or anything that would ruin the most important night of her sister's life! Calls for Jessica to out herself to her sister at this point, are a little premature.

[Mirani]

oh well. "creased to hell" but the seam tear is not visable.

Phew, there's me thinking it was not fit to wear ... silly me!

[Karen564]

Well Jess,:hugs:

That happened to me when I was young too...and still remember those feelings long ago to get dressed in a beautiful gown can be completely overwhelming & I knew better, but did it anyways.....then hearing that dreaded sound...then it's Oh Sh*t, I'm in big doo doo, what am I gonna do now!?....and think that was my 1st sudden introduction to sewing 101.....lol

I had a much older sister that made the mistake of storing her wedding gown at my parents house..lol
(Um, just to be clear, this was after the wedding, so I hope I don't get beaten with a stick here)

Hey, we have all done stuff we regretted after the fact, but that's life.......live & learn..
And I'm sure it was just an accident & you never intended to cause damage to it, and you already felt bad enough about it after it happened...so I cant see bashing you to death about it..

Hopefully you can repair the gown & and then keep your fingers crossed and don't forget to say a prayer too....lol

:hugs:

[KandisTX]

In all honesty, I have to say that trying on someone's ball gown before they have had a chance to wear it for the intended event it was purchased, is somewhat callous.

NOW that I have said that, Jessica: You have GOT to do something to make this right for your sister, whether you make up a story as suggested about it falling on the floor and you stepping on it or something, she has to know there is a possible flaw in the dress so she can get it repaired before the big night.

Kandis:love::rose2:
((yes, I'm being relatively nice since I know from her profile that Jessica is still young, and hasn't quite been through all the same experiences as the rest of us "older" gals.))

[Terri D]

Bet you wish you didn't share your gown misadventure. Do the right thing. Have the damage repaired. Have it pressed. And don't do it again. After you have done the right thing,several years from now you can look back and it will be funny.
If you don't,you will ruin a very important moment in your sisters life. One that she will always remember. And not fondly.
Godd luck.

[Tranny Tee]

Everyone who did not wear Mom's or sister's clothes raise your hands.

[frederica13]

Everyone who did not wear Mom's or sister's clothes raise your hands.

Haha sorry mom...

[Stephenie S]

I think maybe EVERYBODY tries on mom's clothes.

[docrobbysherry]

WHAT HAPPENED next!?:eek:

Did she find the rip? Did u get it fixed? I MUST know!:brolleyes:

[makin' it real]

That tearing sound must have just torn through you, too. Others have already gone through the no-noes, and now you know you really do have to do something to fix it.

I spent the first 40+ years of my crossdressing "borrowing" or stealing from others. I usually only had a piece or two, and that was enough to last till my next purge, but I feel much shame, humility, and regret about it now. Please, for your own future well-being sake, don't continue this pattern of taking from others. It's a bad pattern to hold and hide.

One time I went into a gg roommate's closet and tried on a dress of hers. Well, you guessed it, it ripped. I was horrified! OMG what the heck am I going to do?!?! Well, I knew if she saw the rip (and of course she would eventually) she'd know it was me because there were only the two of us living there. So in order to avoid her finding out I'd been creepily creeping into her space and her things I took her dress out and had it professionally repaired. Yes, I was embarrassed to take it to the shop, figuring everyone there would know exactly what happened. Whether they knew or not didn't matter, I was scared anyway. Then I returned it to her closet and never heard anything about it.

It kept me out of her closet from there on out, but I somehow didn't learn the lesson. It took me another 10 years or so to accept this CDing as a part of me so that then I could accept that it's okay for me to have clothes of my own, in fact that I deserve them. I know that self-acceptance was the turning point for me in not taking from others anymore. It's weird. It's like I was hiding/denying my CDing even from me, so therefore I somehow had to be dishonest in getting the clothes too.

The change to self-acceptance led directly to the change in clothing sources. I don't know where you are in your process, but I wish for you much self-love and self-appreciation.

[Melissa73]

ok this hots home for me! i can recall wearing my sisters graduation dress 1 time. Ripped it at the seams bad! So it happenes. But i did the wrong thing....i hid it. And i did get fouynd out.....but i also really remember being stuck with the dress on. Its the most tramatic time ever...thinking u will have to stay in the dress forever lol

[t-girlxsophie]

CD rule #2: Wear your own clothes!

Yeah but what is CD rule #1?

[Amanda Stubbs]

I would doubt very much if many on these pages could say they had never borrowed clothes from others. We all started out somewhere and it's usually with sneaked sessions of a family members clothes. Let the person without sin cast the first stone.

Having said that, you have overstepped the mark by wearing it before her and as previously stated you must put it right. I appreciate you do not want to 'out' yourself but you have to come up with a reason for the damage, don't over complicate it with elaborations keep it simple and give her the money for replacement/repair.

Most importantly learn from your mistake and get your own clothes.

[Jonianne]

.......Let the person without sin cast the first stone....

Just don't forget the rest of the passage: "......go, and sin no more." Jn 8:11

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I won't add any further condemnation about your wearing her gown. Therefore, the only honorable solution to this situation would be.

1. Admit to it immediately and offer to pay for 2 ball gowns.
2. Offer something of value of yours to damaged to her, such as maybe an XBOX 360 and games if you own one.

[Ze]

Everyone who did not wear Mom's or sister's clothes raise your hands.

*raises hand*

And once again, we seem to be missing the point that we're talking about a PROM DRESS, not a second-hand pair of socks. And further so, the lack of respect for the sister in question by simply putting it back and, based on the OP, with little regret or guilt.

Age isn't a good excuse here, seeing as how I'm in that bracket myself.

[Blaire]

Yeah but what is CD rule #1?

Thy wife shall know this of you well prior to marriage, children, and commingled finances.

[Jessica Kelly]

Thanks for all your feedback and advice guys!
Quick update:
On further inspection the damage is not externally visible but there is small anomaly on the inside. My sister is aware of it but she's not the over-caring type. She recently ruined one of my hoodies, so, without her being aware of it, I think we are even :P I even made her a mix CD that she wanted as well so I don't feel guilty any more.
I'm aware that many of you are either offended or very passionate about what I did, but, to be honest, you don't know my sister, so no worries... I feel I've made it up to her in my own way.

Thanks to those who supported me
x

[JustAlex]

Everyone who did not wear Mom's or sister's clothes raise your hands.

I have to lower my two hands, my head, my shoulders, dig a hole ten feet deep and I'm not sure I'd get to the proper level.
This reminds me one time when I was wearing my mom's black pantyhose and I ripped it I don't know against what. I don't have to tell you that it was not fixable.
I know that the right thing to do is to take responsibility and face the consequences. However, I couldn't imagine (nor can I imagine today) me going to my mom saying "sorry mom, I'm a crossdresser, I wore your black pantyhose and ripped it"

Sometimes you have to let it go. I did.

PS: more than 30 years later, I'm paying her utilities. On a second thought, maybe it's better to come out to your sister :heehee: