Pink fog gone and a problem with passing.

[Nicole Erin]

Yep, has something to do with what a friend told me -
For some odd reasson he wants me to live with him, well, not in so many words but his place is a dump and he has a screaming baby, not my thing...

He was like, "If you were to stay here, you would have to present completely as a woman when people saw you come and go..."

So that is my thing - I am often too damned lazy to put forth effort to really pass well. Sad isn't it? :o

Makeup has become a chore, as has doing my hair well (but I still do if I must), I refuse to wear a bra, I hate skirts, I hate wedding dresses, gowns, and other "cinderella" attire
My sexy heels have been replaced with low heel sandals (one inch maybe) and flats.

Honestly, yes I want to live full time as a woman, but I am gonna have to go with the GG's 100% on one thing - dressing pretty is a huge hassle. That "pink fog" concept is now foreign to me.

I am hoping after some time on HRT, I can better pass without a ton of hassle.

It's like at what point did getting pretty become this loathsome chore instead of something fun. Right now I just have on this grey blouse, black capri slacks, boring sandals, and I imagine no one wants to hear about my beige undies... :thumbsdn:

TG events used to make me think - "Oh boy, I get to be pretty!" but now it is like, "Does this mean I have to wear makeup AND pantyhose?"

[Phyliss]

Sounds like "The Bloom is off the rose"

Am I reading correctly between the lines, that the Grass isn't any GREENER on that side of the fence?

[Sheila]

Nicole :rofl: welcome to the real world of a GG ........... worry not dear, when you find someone who interests you, you will suddenly find this need to "pretty up" coming back with a vengeance ;) or when there really is a need to dress up, like that dinner you can't avoid and you need to make that good impression you will maybe find it a chore but you will do it and good :)

[Stephenie S]

Welcome to the REAL world, dear.

It's actually quite nice when you get used to it. It's a bit more hassle, but the rewards are immense.

Why do you think you have more trouble "passing"? Dressing to the nines is often nothing but an attention getter. You pass much more easily when you look like every other women out there.

Stephie

[Katesback]

How about just being you and not worrying about what other people see you as!

[kimdl93]

Getting dressed can be a hassle - but I'd be more concerned about moving in with that friend. Can't stand a messy place and I particularly can't stand picking up after slobs.

[Andy66]

Aaaahhhh... you're starting to get it, my dear. Whenever I read some CDs saying "Why don't women wear slips and pantyhose and high heels and full makeup all the time? Don't they know how pretty and fun it is?" ...it makes me :facepalm:. Now I think you're really becoming a woman, Erin, because you get it. :)

Um... about that friend... obviously I don't know him, but I would be questioning if he might be trying to take advantage of your kindness.

[docrobbysherry]

That one day I'll TIRE of dressing to the 9's every time I CD!?:brolleyes:

Ugh! "Flats and 1" heels"? Oh, I hope THAT day never comes!:doh:

[mklinden2010]

It's mind over matter.

You don't mind and it doesn't matter.

[Karen564]

Regardless of the dressing,

Sounds to me that your Friend just wants to live out his own fantasy, and figures you would jump at the opportunity .....

But what happens when he gets tired of that fantasy & comes up with a new one?
Or will he drop you like a hot potato?

I hope you get your head screwed on straight 1st before you seriously go for this..

[melissacd]

You have to be true to yourself. If you enjoy dressing up all the time then do it. If you prefer a more casual style then do that.

Today I threw on a sundress, light sweater, casual sandals, ear rings, necklace and pulled my hair back in a pony tail. I went out to run some errands without any makeup at all. The woman next door gave me a polite hello and friendly smile as if nothing were out of the normal. People I meet treat me in the gender that I present as. It seems that if you have enough feminine like markers (that in fact only take moments to put on) that you can pass well enough to be accepted as a female. One of the benefits of the more casual styles of today and the less is more makeup approach is that you can more easily pass. I did have on breast forms, but I never use padding and I did not have on hosiery or high heels. At first I hated not getting all glammed up but as I move more and more into living my life presenting as a female the hassle of always going to the nines really starts to make itself more obvious and I gain more understanding why women don't. It also makes the times that I do get dolled up all the more special.

So by all means, do whatever makes you feel good and good luck on your own personal journey. Do not worry about what your male friend wants, he must accept you for who you are, not who he wants you to be, if he cannot then you need to move on to find someone who will.

Melissa

[Nicole Erin]

Sounds like "The Bloom is off the rose"

Am I reading correctly between the lines, that the Grass isn't any GREENER on that side of the fence?

Sounds about right.

But yeah a more natural look seems to pass better than the attention-getting "9's" cause people tend not to look as hard.

Now my friend, no it is not some potential lover. Besides, he is usually too busy complaining about his family, in-laws, how much companies pay, how the GOVT works, education, about the utility companies, about telecom companies, ... (not enough room on the web to list everything)

Besides that, my fat butt doesn't have the body to wear "fetish" outfits like mini's or revealing tops. :heehee:

[Kayla Shadows]

I hear ya.Unless I'm going to a club or something it is too much work for me some days.I'll throw on what I can get away with at the moment,a lil eyeliner and go.I might go out tomarrow night so I might go all out but that is for ME.I want to look my best and feel good.With everything,I have my moods.Sometimes Im like whatever and sometime Im like,yeah,its on tonight,there are drinks to be had and hearts to be broken.After all,Im me for me.