Cheryl James
05-27-2010, 10:21 PM
After my "firsts" of the last two nights and , sort of, tennis this afternoon, my plan tonight was to roller blade on the boardwalk at the beach. I began to get ready around 6PM and could have walked out the door at 7:15PM except for three important telephone calls. The last one ended at 8:30PM and my goal of rollerblading in the dusk was gone. I had dressed for that activity, Tommy Hilfiger shorts (fairly short, but not the cut-off type that the younger girls look so great in), an American Eagle clingy t-shirt, a cowgirl hat that, actually, didn't look bad, my women's readers, and some open-toed sandal that had about a 1" heel. My roller blades were in the car. It would have been a leisurely 4-mile skate on a pretty busy stretch of beachfront. It is still on the list.
So, after the last call ended, I was already dressed and I didn't want to change, so back to the mall I went. My goal, decided upon while driving there, was to enter a main entrance and walk into the mall to, at least a major intersection of hallways. Well, it was closing time, again, and I just couldn't get myself through the door against the traffic. I guess it is one thing to go into a fairly empty department store and browse the bras in solitude, and, yet, another thing to face the crowds. I felt so proud last night, tonight I question whether I will ever be able to get past this hurdle.
And, there was a downside. While trying to muster up the courage to go into the mall, I stood around window shopping about 30 - 40 feet from the entrance. A young (16, 17, maybe) girl came out of the mall and walked in my direction. I pretended to make a cell phone call and continued to window shop. They had some really cute short shorts that I would love to have been able to wear when I was fifteen. Well, the girl stopped right behind me (maybe 3 or 4 feet) and didn't move. I didn't look at her, but I sensed that she was looking at me. I don't really know if she was or not, but I thought it sounded much more perceptive to say that I "sensed" her looking at me.
OK, so I was getting a little uncomfortable, so I moved away from the window and her. And, I didn't see her for about five minutes. Now, I am still hanging around trying to get over the case of nerves, when I notice that she returned and sat down on a bench about 20 feet from where I was standing. I glanced her way and saw that she was staring at me. I guess I don't pass that well. Here is what makes me mad at myself, I glanced at her and saw her staring at me and I looked away. I failed to follow the advice of one of you girls. I should have held my head up and stared her down. I wasn't hurting anybody. Why did I give her that power over me?
Eventually, I accepted the fact that it wasn't going to happen so I made my way back to my car. On the positive side, I walked by two very busy restaurants that have outside seating. In each restaurant there happened to be a table of 2 young women right by the walkway. I did look their way and I did keep my head up. They didn't do much more than a glance my way, but they took no special notice of me, viewing me as just another woman walking to her car.
On the drive home I decide that I need one more try at capturing another flag. So, I decide to stop at the ATM and get some cash. Now, the ATM that I use happens to be about 15 feet from the main entrance to a very, very busy grocery store. And, it is situated right by the sidewalk that a large number of shoppers use to enter and exit the store. So, I park and walk across the parking lot. I reach the sidewalk and begin to walk toward the door of the store and the ATM. There are about 5 or 6 cars parked at the curb facing the sidewalk. I checked them as I walked and all appeared to be empty.....except the one closest to the ATM. There was a girl of about 16 or 17 in the drivers seat talking on her cell phone. I looked at he, she looked at me...and kept on talking to the other person. I went to the ATM, she could monitor me the entire time. I did what I was supposed to do, some shoppers came and went, but did not walk directly by me. I got the money and decided, what the heck, let's give this girl a good look. So, I walked off the sidewalk about 8-10 feet from her drivers side window (it was down). She paid no attention to me. I did have to walk right in front of a couple of guys, but there was no problem that I could see.
Again, I've gone on and on. It's funny, in guy mode I could go quite awhile without saying much. Cheryl must have gotten the verbosity gene. Thanks for caring enough to read this. Have a good night.
So, after the last call ended, I was already dressed and I didn't want to change, so back to the mall I went. My goal, decided upon while driving there, was to enter a main entrance and walk into the mall to, at least a major intersection of hallways. Well, it was closing time, again, and I just couldn't get myself through the door against the traffic. I guess it is one thing to go into a fairly empty department store and browse the bras in solitude, and, yet, another thing to face the crowds. I felt so proud last night, tonight I question whether I will ever be able to get past this hurdle.
And, there was a downside. While trying to muster up the courage to go into the mall, I stood around window shopping about 30 - 40 feet from the entrance. A young (16, 17, maybe) girl came out of the mall and walked in my direction. I pretended to make a cell phone call and continued to window shop. They had some really cute short shorts that I would love to have been able to wear when I was fifteen. Well, the girl stopped right behind me (maybe 3 or 4 feet) and didn't move. I didn't look at her, but I sensed that she was looking at me. I don't really know if she was or not, but I thought it sounded much more perceptive to say that I "sensed" her looking at me.
OK, so I was getting a little uncomfortable, so I moved away from the window and her. And, I didn't see her for about five minutes. Now, I am still hanging around trying to get over the case of nerves, when I notice that she returned and sat down on a bench about 20 feet from where I was standing. I glanced her way and saw that she was staring at me. I guess I don't pass that well. Here is what makes me mad at myself, I glanced at her and saw her staring at me and I looked away. I failed to follow the advice of one of you girls. I should have held my head up and stared her down. I wasn't hurting anybody. Why did I give her that power over me?
Eventually, I accepted the fact that it wasn't going to happen so I made my way back to my car. On the positive side, I walked by two very busy restaurants that have outside seating. In each restaurant there happened to be a table of 2 young women right by the walkway. I did look their way and I did keep my head up. They didn't do much more than a glance my way, but they took no special notice of me, viewing me as just another woman walking to her car.
On the drive home I decide that I need one more try at capturing another flag. So, I decide to stop at the ATM and get some cash. Now, the ATM that I use happens to be about 15 feet from the main entrance to a very, very busy grocery store. And, it is situated right by the sidewalk that a large number of shoppers use to enter and exit the store. So, I park and walk across the parking lot. I reach the sidewalk and begin to walk toward the door of the store and the ATM. There are about 5 or 6 cars parked at the curb facing the sidewalk. I checked them as I walked and all appeared to be empty.....except the one closest to the ATM. There was a girl of about 16 or 17 in the drivers seat talking on her cell phone. I looked at he, she looked at me...and kept on talking to the other person. I went to the ATM, she could monitor me the entire time. I did what I was supposed to do, some shoppers came and went, but did not walk directly by me. I got the money and decided, what the heck, let's give this girl a good look. So, I walked off the sidewalk about 8-10 feet from her drivers side window (it was down). She paid no attention to me. I did have to walk right in front of a couple of guys, but there was no problem that I could see.
Again, I've gone on and on. It's funny, in guy mode I could go quite awhile without saying much. Cheryl must have gotten the verbosity gene. Thanks for caring enough to read this. Have a good night.