not entirely sure where i stand.

[JamieRohr]

So im not sure if this is the right place to post this, but oh well..

ive been debating this for nearly a decade now, but i still don't know if I am attracted only to guys or both genders. Also, I feel that im a lot more confident and relaxed when I dress as a girl as opposed to my male side. I dont have an extreme urge to have sexual reassignment surgery, but I feel that everything in my life would be more in line if I were a girl.

I dont know if this is appropriate or not, but, whenever I have urges, I tend to think more of guys than of girls. Its harder for me to get turned on when i think of girls...

I dont think im asking myself the right questions when it comes to this... what does everyone else think?

Thank you all so much for your time.

[ellenwannabe]

I think we all go through this stage at one time or another - I have talked to other guys on gay date.com but have never had any encounters with another guy - I am married but my wife doesn't encourage my CDing but I dress daily in female clothes that are not "too girly" and she puts up with it - if I was younger I would certainly seriously consider becoming the woman I'd love to be - so your post is in the right place and I'm sure you'll get lots of posts that I hope help you sort things out - Ellen

[Faith_G]

Your orientation and your gender identity are two different things. You don't need to be a woman to be attracted to men. :happy:

You don't have to get surgery to live as a woman - ever. You can keep at it for as long as you like and nobody is going to say "Time's up!" and haul you off to the hospital for SRS. :devil:

Please don't feel like you have to make some sort of commitment to being a "real" transsexual. Explore and find what makes you happy and comfortable - then go with it, whatever it is. :hugs:

[JamieRohr]

Ellen - Thank you. =)

Faith - i love to dress up as a woman. and im physically attracted to the male body.

i guess a part of me is afraid to accept the possibility that i may not be attracted to women? I might start to sound like im contradicting myself, but im just confused.. (but im sure thats how some people are when they are asking these question.)

so i guess the question is... do i identify myself as a woman or as a guy?

At this point i seriously feel like im bisexual. =_= i wish everything was clear cut.

[Faith_G]

i guess a part of me is afraid to accept the possibility that i may not be attracted to women? I might start to sound like im contradicting myself, but im just confused.. (but im sure thats how some people are when they are asking these question.) Nope, I get you. I was raised in a very homophobic environment and it was hard for me to admit to myself where my desires were. :hugs:



so i guess the question is... do i identify myself as a woman or as a guy?

At this point i seriously feel like im bisexual. =_= i wish everything was clear cut.Only you can answer that question.

Think of orientation like the balance knob on a stereo - it's OK to be somewhere in the middle. :happy: You don't have to pick a team. :heehee:

[pamela_a]

so i guess the question is... do i identify myself as a woman or as a guy?

At this point i seriously feel like im bisexual. =_= i wish everything was clear cut.

These are 2 completely separate questions.
The first one is about your gender. Who you are.
The second is your sexuality, to whom you are attracted.

The answer to one should have minimal effect on the other.

[Hope]

Faith is right on. It sounds like you are asking (and possibly answering) 2 separate questions right now.

And don't feel like you have to answer them right this very instant. Or ever. And know that your answer can change.

[JamieRohr]

pamela - you're right. ive been assuming theres a relation between my gender identity with my sexual orientation. thanks for pointing that out. i didnt realize that till now.

Faith and Hope - yea, its for me to decide, and i guess ill just go with the flow on how i feel about everything.

Thanks everyone =)

[fallen_rayne]

Whether your male, female, trans-sexual, inner-sexual, or just cross-dressing, whatever you feel most comfortable as should be what your proclaim yourself to be. I go to work as a guy, to school, at my apartment with 4 other room-mates, or to my parents house, hell most of the time I go out as a guy. I'm so deep into the closet I'm finding Christmas presents. Though, i still refer to myself as a girl. It's what i feel more comfortable with. One of my room-mates said:

"Gender is up here [the head] and sex is down here [pelvis area]"

I think all of my room-mates would be cool with me being a girl, but that's a post for a different thread, basically do what makes you feel comfortable because your the one that has to live with yourself; there is no point trying to make yourself miserable by doing what society deems right.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Hi veronica...:hugs:

2 questions...pls try your best to take who you want to be with out of your thought process...

your long term feelings about yourself , your own personal identity, and your own ability to live a fulfilling life are much more important..

and those are all in play when you are suffering gender issues...in your mind, are you a man? or a woman? or something in between? it seems easy but there are so many hangups, family and societal pressures, financial implications, trans and homophobic thoughts..etcetc...that they all get in the way ...

i found all those things really hard to deal with...i wanted to make money, i wanted kids, etc etc...

you have a long long long time to decide, you are beautiful, and you are asking all the right questions...these are all huge advantages for you...

don't complicate it by your sexuality...just enjoy your sexuality.

[prene]

All I know what you mean.
I love girls but I have had this unusual feeling for the first time. I had spent some time with my friend Jackie. I look at her and wanted her body (as a guy) but I have gone out dresses with her and I caught myself envying her body and wanting it as mine.

[Ms Jennifer]

I agree with Faith.you do not have to decide what you are.Or what you want to do.We are all cd but each one is different in their own way.So don"t do anything you are not comfortable with.Good luck and keep us updated.