Are there rules to crossdressing?

[Deborah Jane]

After reading more than one thread recently where it was intimated that certain things shouldn't be worn together, or that certain looks were frowned upon, it got me thinking...........

Bearing in mind, that a lot of what we do is a form of self expression and we do it for our own differant reasons [whatever they are].

There still seem to be some among us who feel the need to tell us what is acceptable and what isn't, leading me to ask.......

Are there rules to crossdressing?

[LaraCreaft]

I would imagine only as it applies to good fashion. I wouldn't know for certain, however.

[Cait]

There are no rules, anybody that suggests otherwise is, quite frankly, a fool (in my opinion). They are just clothes, wear and do what you please.

[Rianna Humble]

I have a few rules for myself - don't know if that counts, but here they are anyway:

1 If I don't feel comfortable about wearing something, I won't

2 Because I want to blend in, I try mainly to wear stuff that seems appropriate to me

3 If a GG friend tells me "that really suits you" and I like it, I'll wear it (if it doesn't cost too much). :)

4 If I think it makes me look like Coco the clown, I'll only wear it if I want to look like a clown :eek:

:2c:

[Phyliss]

Rule #1. .... wig on head
Rule #2. .... shoes on feet
Rule #3. .... skirts on bottom
Rule #4. .... blouses on top

Everything else is optional. within the bounds of social modesty, or, not.

[noeleena]

Hi,

Depends on your age. & if your in groups as i am so yes there are.
Im a Edwardian girl our group dress in the 1900 to 1910 time,

we are not victorian all tho that was before, during, & after.

& some of us sew & make our own clothes i do, its a lot of hard work at times & yes its fun,
most of us are over 50 up to 70 years of age .

Out side of that you make your own rules if you need to or have an eye for clothes that look nice are nice fitting & your at home in them.
i have some i wear every day at home . & other causal clothes for going down the road , & evening wear, depends on where your going & what your doing , really its common sence , well it is for us women ,
you choose , you wear.

...noeleena...

[eluuzion]

hmmmmm...

Well, here is my position...

"Rules" were a list of specific behaviors and actions drafted by my parents that were either required or specifically forbidden while growing up.

When I reached the benchmark of "legal age", those rules became the "rules of the house" when visiting my parents home.

In the outside world the concept of "rules" became various examples of people trying to control some part of their world and the behavior of others that stepped in to it. Basically, not something I devoted much effort to or felt obligation to follow.. :)

Now, "Rules" only have meaning to me in a social etiquette context, not anything I feel compelled to cater to.

The only time I genuinely consider taking any references to "rules" seriously, is when they are called "Legal Statutes". Even then, there is no guarantee I will follow all (or any) of them. :D

In my life, there are few (if any) "rules" that apply in every situation in life. Just like the sandbox we played in at recess during elementary school...the more rules there were...the less fun everybody had...lol

So, I guess my answer to this one is...No, there are no CD rules in my CD operators' manual. :love:

[Kate Simmons]

Whoever tells you that is full of "donkey dust" Debs.:)

[erickka]

Rule #1. .... wig on head
Rule #2. .... shoes on feet
Rule #3. .... skirts on bottom
Rule #4. .... blouses on top

Everything else is optional. within the bounds of social modesty, or, not.

So True!! LOL

There are no rules in my book either, since all it says is be the best person you can be, and remember one thing... Harm none.

[tamarav]

Yes, there are definite rules for crossdressing. They are in the appendix of the fashion manual. I have one somewhere but can't seem to find it right now...

[Tina B.]

Of course there are rules, well only one that I think you should be aware of, and that is Be sure to cover up the dirty bits when going out in public all other rules are just guide lines!
Tina B.

I have to give credit for the "Dirty Bits" to Monty Python

[linnea]

Although I liked Phyllis's rules, my answer to the question is NO.

[ellenwannabe]

NO - wear what you like and are comfortable in - enjoy - Ellen

[Tommie T.]

I went to a friends birthday party in a sweater-low cut of coarse-and dress slacks with heels.One of the girls told me "crossdressers don't wear pants".I guess I broke a rule but must have misplaced my fashion rule book.

[StaceyJane]

Rule number 1 Have fun

Rule number 2 Don't purge!!!!!!

[Deborah Jane]

There are no rules, anybody that suggests otherwise is, quite frankly, a fool (in my opinion). They are just clothes, wear and do what you please.

I like this idea...............Rules?...........There are no rules :D


Rule #1. .... wig on head
Rule #2. .... shoes on feet
Rule #3. .... skirts on bottom
Rule #4. .... blouses on top



Be sure to cover up the dirty bits when going out in public



NO - wear what you like and are comfortable in - enjoy - Ellen


Rule number 1 Have fun

Rule number 2 Don't purge!!!!!!

Ok, I accept we have to have a few rules.....The ones above seem perfectly sufficient to me :thumbsup::D

Unless someone else has any rules they think we should have?

[Jamiegirl1]

No Rules,wear whatever you want as long as it's legal

[docrobbysherry]

In civilized societies, there r ALWAYS RULES!:Angry3:

To prove my point:

How many CDs go the store dressed looking like you're hosting a drag queen show?
How many mature CDs visit their friends looking like a Barbie doll? Put your makeup on with a trowel?
How many younger CDs go to clubs in loose, heavy granny gear? Or, in only a bra, panties, and heels?

If u EVER go out dressed, I submit there r LOTS of rules you'd NEVER consider violating!:straightface:

Even avowed closet CDs, such as myself, have rules! I sometimes dress crudely and VERY tastelessly in private, (YES! Even worse than the pics you've seen!):doh: Of course, you'll never see those pics!:heehee:

And, even then, I have my own dressing rules I won't break even when I'm alone in private and NOT filming!:eek:
And, I think we ALL HAVE THOSE! However different they may be!:brolleyes:

[Lorileah]

I saw a young lady this weekend downtown. She was topless, except for two small round pasties that covered her nipples (think 50 cent pieces) and she was within rules. I saw several males at the same event topless, no nipple covers bellies hiding their belt buckles (if they had belts, most the shorts were showing 4" of cleavage) and they were in the rules.

Now as taste goes, I really liked the GG outfit. The guys not so much. Maybe nipple pasties and butt pasties for guys is in order?

Rules? We don't need no stinkin' rules. I wear what I like. I like what I wear. All the preachy squeaky fearful posts here...they don't bother me...until they direct them at me. I say, if you gots it...flaunt it.

[kimdl93]

I took that thread a little differently. I don't think anyone is advocating rules for cross dressing - rather they were simply observing that in public, the more outlandish outfits (whether worn by a GG or CD) will draw attention...and when worn by a CD, tend to reinforce stereotypes about CDs.

It all depends on the venue.

A note of full disclosure - I can't bring myself out in public (at least not yet), so maybe I shouldn't be commenting on this either. But if I could, I'd want to look age and situation appropriate. The former is pretty limiting, but the latter allows one to express herself quite freely...just not around schools and shopping malls!

[Lorileah]

*excuse me Debs as I side track this a moment...still sort of within the OP)

What the heck is age and situation appropriate? Ok, you are at the beach and you are wearing a "Little House on the Prairie" dress while everyone else is wearing swimsuit. Situation?

You are Rachel Welch and you are at a social function wearing a LBD that shows your marvelous body. Age?

These are the "rules" Debs was asking about. And I agree with her. Where are they written down because I have never seen them. (Tamara, can you get me a copy of that book?). Last year I posted something with a photo of me and was told I was too old to dress like that. I didn't see a "for ages 14-29" on the tag.

We place ourselves in these "rules" things. Illegality aside (dirty bits) why do we need to place these rules? I will buy the time and place thing but it is MY decision what is the time and place. Show of hands here, who dresses to look like their 5th grade teacher?

Life is short
Break the rules (if you don't harm others)
Forgive quickly (especially yourself)
Kiss slowly
Love truly
Laugh uncontrollably

and never regret anything that made you smile

No re-rides at this rodeo

*now back to the OP.,...thanks Debs*

[Deborah Jane]

Thanks Lori for clarifying things, you've hit the nail on the head :thumbsup:

No where have I ever seen rules for crossdressing, I've seen advice, I've seen opinions, based on a particular persons perspective, but never hard and fast rules.

The only real rule I've ever had with my crossdressing is....If it feels good, do it!!!!

Hell, if there were hard and fast rules, I'd stop crossdressing in an instant, as rules take the fun factor out of everything!!

I'm sure we all have self imposed rules, put in place for our own reasons, but I for one, have never felt the need to push my rules onto anyone else!!

[kimdl93]

*.....

We place ourselves in these "rules" things. Illegality aside (dirty bits) why do we need to place these rules? I will buy the time and place thing but it is MY decision what is the time and place. Show of hands here, who dresses to look like their 5th grade teacher?.....*now back to the OP.,...thanks Debs*

To paraphrase...."First, you must be a CD for the CD'ers "rules" to apply ..... And second, the rules are more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules. Welcome aboard the Black Pearl, Miss Turner." :)

[Samantha B L]

Lori and everybody,there are NO rules. The exception being that there are certain procedures in how to handle makeup so you do a good job and don't make a mess or the right ways to put on hosiery and lingerie so you don't tear em up and other things like putting on wigs and doing it right. A few little things like that. I was taught stuff like that by GG's who were close freinds. Anyway,I don't dress age apropriately. I am NOT altogether passable so I go for kind of a drag queen look. My latest aquisition is a custom made Ronnie Specter("Veronica" in the early sixties trio The Ronettes)wig which I ordered from fifi-mahony in New Orleans. I think I could be passable if I went for one of those CD makeovers which I may decide to do one of these days. There are no rules. And there shouldn't be any. I've seen some incredible wigs and outfits on LGBT and TG/TS/CD people and speaking as a CD if they ever create a rulebook for proper CD attire I will probably end up losing my copy in a gas station restroom.

[Naomi Rayne]

There are most definitely NO RULES. There are only social guidelines which in my opinion are bogus because society shouldnt really decide anything because it all comes from personal opinion.

[JOY445]

Regal head wear only (tiaras, etc)
Underwear? underneath!
Lovely lavender lips (at night)
Exfoliate exfoliate, i'll say it again...exfoliate!
Spandex never (if ur 6 foot 290lbs, like moi)

anything else is merely accessorizing!

love JOY

[TrekGirl1701]

There are definitely no rules for crossdressing, besides the obvious one of not exposing your privates.

I, too, have been told, Lori, that I should dress my age. I just have to ask, why? I'm nearly 28 years old, but almost all of my clothes have been bought in the Juniors section at the various stores I shop at. The reason I do that is because the clothes are just more my style. I work with a GG who is over 40 and also buys her clothes in the Juniors section. I know this because she's worn some of the exact clothes that I, myself, have bought. :lol:

I don't like that some people have taken to being fashion police officers. I'm sure a bunch of us on here have seen these TV shows. These are the people who lecture to you on what's in and what's out and which colors go best together and why you should dress your age. What's ironic is sometimes these people are wearing clothes that I wouldn't touch with a 50 foot pole.

So, no, there are no rules. Wear what you like. Nobody can tell you otherwise.

[NicoleScott]

If there are rules, who enforces them?

[Rianna Humble]

Rule #1. .... wig on head
Rule #2. .... shoes on feet
Rule #3. .... skirts on bottom
Rule #4. .... blouses on top

Everything else is optional. within the bounds of social modesty, or, not.

I would only question Rule #2

[Deborah Jane]

I would only question Rule #2

Ok, I know I'm gonna end up looking stupid when I see the answer, but what's wrong with rule 2, where else would you wear shoes? :heehee:

[Rianna Humble]

Like some GG's, late at night I occasionally carry the shoes

[sissystephanie]

The major rule for CD's is the same as for GG's or even regular guys! If it is illegal to show it, cover it up!! Pretty much everything else goes, unless you really have bad taste in clothes!!

[Fab Karen]

Yes, for 39.95 I will ship the handbook to you.

[carhill2mn]

If you CD only at home, there are no "rules". If you are going to be out in public then some "common sense" rules might apply as to what is the activity, where is it, who will be there, do I want to blend in or stand out, do I want to be perceived as a "lady", etc.

[Lover girl]

Rule#1 When walking in high heels you must maintain balance at all times.
Rule #2 If some says hello to you, Say hello back to them.
Rule #3 If someone tells you that they don't like your dress, Ignor them because there idiots.
Rule #4 If it looks like it might rain, Bring an umbrella or you will need a new perm.
rule #5 Don't wear panty's in the docter office!!!! See thread " Things that make you think Oh NO "
Rule #6 Always carry a can of mace with you, The fashion police are everywhere.
I can't remember the rest of the rules right now, But I think you can make them up as you go!!! That's what I did!!!!! Just have fun!!!!! :drink: :2c:

[AKAMichelle]

if there are rules then nobody showed them to me. Plus even if they did I would just claim that I can't read.

[~Michelle~]

If there are rules, who enforces them?

How about the law? Unless you think you can run around in public with nothing but a thong and high heels.

[ReineD]

There are no rules in private. In public, it depends on how much you want to be accepted by others or how much you want to blend in, whether you CD or not. The rules aren't written in stone, and they do vary depending on the situation and in what part of the world you live.

Most offices have certain rules for office wear. Most schools have a dress code. You wouldn't wear a bathing suit out to a fancy dress ball or to church. You wouldn't walk down the street half naked or in a Halloween costume outside of Halloween, if you wanted to be taken seriously by others. In an artistic milieu, I suppose anything goes, but not in a conservative environment. These are the obvious rules, but there are more subtle rules determined by social convention.

I don't know who makes up the rules. But I do know that generally people wish to feel as if they belong and there is a difference in how I'm treated depending on how I dress, even if it is a subtle difference. I wouldn't expect to be given a good table in a fancy restaurant if I walked in looking bedraggled. Why do you think the fashion industry is so big? Maybe it's because the only thing that people have to go on when it comes to gaging someone they haven't yet gotten to know is their appearance: general hygiene and clothing. First impressions do make a difference.

But if you don't care how others treat you, then there are no rules except for abiding by the law. :)

[NathalieX66]

Rule Number One: Be yourself.
....only you know you.
This forum may offer suggestions, but none of us can speak for you.

[Bernadina]

Don't rob banks dressed. It give us a bad name.

[NathalieX66]

Don't rob banks dressed. It give us a bad name.

LOL!, Bernadina, yeah, I'm kind of familiar with that story, being from New Jersey and all. http://www.nj.com/camden/index.ssf/2009/08/crossdressing_jersey_city_bank.html

[jennifer easton]

rules! rules! we don't have any stinking rules!!!!!

[Engendered]

The same way sporting fans from one country are in a sense "representing" their country, crossdressers who go out in public are representing our section of society. I don't want Irish fans behaving badly, as it reflects poorly on the country, and similarly I wouldn't want crossdressers to give us a bad name with their "no rules" choices.

You're still free to wear whatever you like, but taking an "I can do anything I like, as it only effects me" approach can be slightly selfish.

[victoriamwilliams1]

The rule is to follow the same rules that GG's follow:)

[Deborah Jane]

Well bearing in mind that Sheila's completely unruly.......No rules then :D

[Rachaelb64]

Someone famous once said, 'Rule are for the obedience of idiots and the guidences of wise men' (or something along those lines)

Seems I'm neither an idiot or a wise man(ish) I just like to bend the rules to see how far the go :devil:

Ok now and again i do break the odd one or two, but I look sheepish and brush them under the carpet anf hope nobody notices :devil:



P.s. Me being an idiot or not, does depend on who you talk. I would also like to point out those people who think I'm clever, its just all smoke, mirrors and big words :tongueout

[Tina B.]

There are most definitely NO RULES. There are only social guidelines which in my opinion are bogus because society shouldnt really decide anything because it all comes from personal opinion.

As far as social guidelines goes, I belive that would be men don't wear womens clothes, so I guess none of us are very good at following those either
Tina B.

[Sarah Doepner]

Article VII
The Official Crossdressers Handbook - Volume 18, Third Edition
Chapter 4
Section A.2.b.(9c)
All Crossdressers will conform to the standards established by the International Fashion Council, MTF section, published in the January issue of Crossdresser Quarterly following the bi-annual meeting of the representatives elected by local boards. Crossdressers found out of compliance will be politely asked to return to the closet until such time as they can conform. If compliance is not forthcoming, the accused crossdresser may call on counsel to explain the violation. On the third such violation the accused crossdresser may be sent for a makeover and fashion consultation at the nearest supporting member salon (See list in appendix 14b).
Violations will be reviewed at the next meeting and if within the guidelines adopted by the membership, shall be accepted as standard.
=====================
It turns out that the IFC/MTF Section has approved everything ever brought to them (omg that's so cute! where did you get it?), so in effect, you can do anything you want.

[suchacutie]

This thread has been bouncing around in my head for a couple of days. I'm not sure I'd call it a rule, but it seems that the one principle that governs our actions needs to be:

Be truthful to yourself, know that your feminine self is not going to go away, and then act ethically.


Yes, I think that covers it.

tina