How does one stop crossdressing ?

[flogo920]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.

Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.

I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.

Flo

[carrie-ann]

Go full time that's how i stopped wearing male clothes then you don't have them problems no more.

[Samantha B L]

I'm sorry it has to be this way for you,Flo. You sound reluctant about it all.
Maybe your circumstances will be different in 2 or 3 years.



Good Luck in the Future, Samantha

[Jonianne]

If the desire to be like females is a part of who you are, then you can always integrate it into your ordinary life in your own personal way. I rarely fully dress anyway (too hot and too much work!) and just enjoy the special things I do that help me identify with females.

[carhill2mn]

Yes, "life" very frequently gets in the way of crossdressing. A person has to make choices about what actions one will take. The desire to CD will probably never go away entirely.

[sterling12]

Maybe so? But, you are on here formulating questions and participating. Perhaps that's a substitute?

I think as time goes by, you will find ways to "sneak in" some activity. It may not be a total satisfaction, and it's probably not what you want, but I think you will still do it. You see, I don't believe its like a Photography "Hobby." I think most of us are compelled to "release" our femme selves. If we don't, we put ourselves in grave mental peril! You might be able to abstain for a while, even a long while...but, anecdotal accounts around here always claim the same thing: "Pressure builds up, and something pops!"

For whatever reasons, our "Gift" seems to trump just about anything....so, we shall see, won't we?

Peace and Love, Joanie

[monalisa]

Just have to go cold turkey. Give everything feminine away and live unhappily ever after but secure.

[Emma England]

Well, some hobbies do take a lot of time.

But you have to be dressed regardless of how busy you are, so you might as well wear clothes that you like.

[pernille d]

Just have to go cold turkey. Give everything feminine away and live unhappily ever after but secure.

like the humor of your reply , but unfortunatly i think there is too much truth in waht you say to

the title of the thread "how does one stop crossdressing " , answer = you cant. so there has to be space for it :)

[lavistaa62]

We've all felt the stress that comes from being denied an opportunity to express ourselves when other activities; like say working on a house, cleaning or doing other chores demand too much of our time. CD as an activity does take up a lot of time but if you're not particularly worried about how you would look to the outside world CD can actually save time and improve your mood and comfort. You all know where it is going now I bet....

It's been REALLY hot here in New England and I've been stuck at the pointy top of a gutted "ell" putting in wiring. While at the top of a 10' ladder in 110 degree heat it struck me that it would be a lot more comfortable in a light and airy dress. Thus was the inspiration for Construction Katie who now is much more productive and happier doing her chores. Being covered in dirt and bruises doesn't mean you can't feel fem or happy.

[Ria]

I Know how you feel, for me dressing is private, I have no interest in doing it full time involving others, particularly my young family.

I find time to CD in the early mornings when planning my day. I'm self employed and have a home office (with a lock on the door). I'm working and dressed, it's very nice.

Can you set your life up in some way that allows you a frequent outlet whilst you get something else done like desk work or planning etc?

[Cheryl T]

For me I think the answer is I'll stop when I die...not that I want to do either...:heehee:

[Sarah Doepner]

When lifes demands make it hard to find time to crossdress, that may or may not be a problem. It really depends on if you accept your dressing as integral to your personality or feel that it's just something you do for kicks. It depends on if you feel you need to do this or not and then how you feel about that "need". Is it something that is necessary to keep your life in balance or is it something that feels like an unwanted addiction? Each of us has to sort through these, and many other, decisions as we address our crossdressing.

The real worry comes when crossdressing's demands make it hard to meet life's obligations. Be sure you are asking the right questions and have a good handle on realistic priorities, unfiltered by a notorious pink fog.

[Nikki A.]

Once bitten, I think death is the only cure. Lets face it, it's part of who we are.

[anonymousinmaryland]

Monalisa and Nikki seems to have it all covered. Can't imagine unloading all my unmentionables. Geez. Good luck in making the right choice.

[Rianna Humble]

I think there are two possible ways to stop cross-dressing, one of which holds positively more prospects than the other. I considered both and opted for number 2.

The two ways I know you can stop cross-dressing:

1 Suicide

2 Transition

[Lynn Marie]

I pretty much see my own crossdressing the same way Flo does, as a "committed hobby". I've had a number of hobbies in my lifetime and a couple of them I've returned to with the same "committment" and passion that I had the first time. I'm passionate about any hobby that I'm currently pursuing. To me that's the whole essence of having a hobby. I pour lots of time and energy and money into my hobbies. Always have and always will. I don't like to do anything halfway.

When my family got in the way of my hobby 25 years ago, I let my hobby go. I returned to it many years later, but it just wasn't the same and I let it go again. There are still some things I'd like to do in that hobby, but it's over and that's just the way it is. I miss lots of things that I was once so actively involved in, but you just let it go. Here's a brief rundown of my hobbies in the last 60 years. U Control Model Airplanes, Model Boats, Guns, Motorcycles, Corvettes, Skydiving, Scuba Diving, Aviation, Slot Cars, CB Radios, Cameras and Photography, Tennis, Bicycles, RC Model Airplanes, Power Boats, Sport Kites, and back to guns again, handguns in particular. In a number of the hobbies I've competed on a pretty high level.

So after making a long reply longer, I wish you the best Flo. Put it away and fulfill your commitments to your home and job and family. Maybe someday you'll come back to it and maybe not. Either way, it's just life.

[Fab Karen]

How does one make a leopard change its spots?

[Jaclyn NM]

I know what you mean, but now that I'm retired, I find that I crossdress to one extent or an other almost daily, and it is delightful.

[minalost]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.

Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.

I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.

Flo

The same thing happened to me in my late 40s. Kids got too old, too much time at work, too many other hobbies. Now that I'm almost an empty nester it has become easier to CD again. Sometimes you just have to put things on hold. But what ever you do, DON'T PURGE! Keep your stuff, even if it's packed away. You'll want it again... believe me!
:hugs:

[Kaz]

I went through several stages of my life, I bought stuff, then purged... and it always came back. Maybe for some us here it is a hobby, but for many it is part of who they are. In more recent years if I reach stages when I can't get into as much as I want, instead of giving it up I bring it inside. Kaz is always part of me. Sometimes she just has to wear men's clothes for extended periods and try to pass!

[lisajane]

Suicide!:tongueout

[patti.jean]

The only thing that even came close for me was a dedicated regiment of meditation. This also took a considerable amount of time 30 minutes to an hour a day at least. But in the end my desires caved in and I am now accepting of who I am. But during my “meditation period” I did almost stop for two years.

[Megan70]

Once bitten, I think death is the only cure. Lets face it, it's part of who we are.


Suicide!:tongueout

These comments are not even close to being funny and do not belong here. Do you realize that over the years perhaps thousands of transvestites, transsexuals, transgendered people have indeed killed themselves because they were so tormented that that was their only way out.
We just don't hear about those silent cry for help deaths.
Shame.:bigsmack::cry:

[jenifer m.]

i gave up trying to quit.now i just enjoy the two sides of my personality,and am enjoying life more than ever befor.ive found that when i came out to mostly everybody i know,and had good results,i decided that there would be no more closet for me any more.my life is twice as interesting as it was when i held back.i say just let yourself go.live a little befor its too late.

[Lynn Marie]

Good advice Megan. When CDing or anything else becomes an obsession rather than a simple avocation, we are treading on dangerous ground. I like hobbies, just don't think one should rule my life to the point of death!

[Nikki A.]

I was a little flippant, and Megan came up with a good point and she is absolutly right. What I meant was this is a part of who I am, and will always be.
To all of our sisters who have contemplated or attempted suicide, I offer my apologies and please understand it was not meant in a manner that makes light of your torment.

[Jane G]

I have to disagree with the hobby theory. I'm a committed sports nut. I played golf for years then gave it up and have never hit another ball. I raced cycles for several years two, but my last bike has hung on the wall in the garage for the past 20 of them. Then I swam, trained with an Olympian, though way off his pace. Again I haven't been in a pool for several years now. In fact the last time I went down to the country club was to play badminton. These days I dive off cliffs and body surf the ocean waves and I'm still just as committed to my latest sport fads, as I was once to golf in my teens, as my 18 year old son will testify, when he leaves dad to the dangerous stuff.

But CDing that's no hobby that’s part of who I am, been with me since the day I was born and it will still be there on my last day.

[Princess Chantal]

Just have to go cold turkey. Give everything feminine away and live unhappily ever after but secure.
So how many people are given restricted diets and forced to give up their passion for particular foods to help secure their health? Do they become unhappy ever after too?
Sometimes you got to suck it up and move on with life without the pouting.

[NicoleScott]

I agree with others: store, don't purge. You may (probably will) want that stuff again.
I agree that "it's a hobby" isn't the primary reason for CD-ing. But, there are aspects of CD-ing I think of as a hobby. I like to make accessories like lace headpieces (headbands) for my maid's outfit. I like to shape and paint fake nails. I like to do minor alterations on my femme clothes. I do things like this in guy mode, and approach it and am rewarded by doing these things in the same way as other hobby activities. But the dressup itself - it's not a hobby - it's more compelling than any hobby.

[sissystephanie]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.
Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.
I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.
Flo

I would definitely have to disagree with the idea that one cannot quit being a CD without excessive psychological stress. YOU can do it if YOU want to!!

That is the main problem, YOU!! You have to really want to stop completely, not part way! Some posters have said don't purge. If you keep your feminine clothing, I guarantee you will not stop CD'ing!! Some years ago I thopught it would be best for my family is I stopped completely. So I did, and purged everything I had at the time. For a 5 year period I never once wore anything feminine, and surprisingly did not care! Then my dear wife, who had totally supported my CD activities, informed me that she missed Stephanie and asked me to start dressing again. She even offered to take me shopping to restock a feminine wardrobe for Stephanie. I freely admit that I do like to wear feminine things, and even though my wife has passed on I still do!

But if my girlfriend, or any of my family asked to stop I would do so in a heartbeat. It can be done! I know because I did it, and without all the so-called stress. If there is stress, it there only because YOU put it there!! Unless you are a total prisoner, your life is your own! Only you can control it the way you want to! It just takes a little willpower!!

[Vicki-Z]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life,

From your statement above it sounds to me like crossdressing is more than a hobby to you. I may be way off base here but since it has persisted through most of your life it sounds more like a gender identity problem to me.

If it is a gender identity problem yes keeping super busy will push it to the background for awhile but eventually it will come back. Many men with gender identity problems ignore it and say it will disappear if I get married, raise a family and keep busy with my career etc., only to have it resurface many years later. I can say this with experience because I did it for 24 years before it came back.

On the other hand if it not a gender identity problem and it just that you like crossdressing I still don't think it is going to totally disappear forever. I'm sorry to say it dear but I think either way you are hooked.


Vicki :hugs:

[dresser1974]

You call this a hobby it isn't this is a lifestyle

[Rianna Humble]

I wouldn't even call it a lifestyle - that implies free choice to me. This is life.

[Kelly Greene]

Flo:
I have to agree with some of the others store your stuff for a while and allow your self some time to catch up with life. You could also try adding some little fem item to your regular life, an anklet you can hide under your sock, switch to panties instead of briefs ( I ware black microfiber panties every day and I have to change into and out of my work uniform every day in a locker room and not a single person has noticed over the past year or so). Life does get in the way of the thing we like to do but that does not mean that you have to give it all up instead give your self time to catch up.
Little things can make a big difference.
If you find things getting too over whelming you may want to find a counselor to talk to.


Kelly Greene

[Aleca]

I am like you where finances, funds, wife and life in general have caused me to hold myself back from CDing. Certainly if you don't feel like doing it is better to leave it out but it is such a rush, such a sense of freedom of the self that no matter how much it will be suppressed by life itself, finances and significant others it will always be there in the subconscious, waiting to come out again.

[Mi$$ Despair]

CDing is work for me at least :D Hey entertaining is what I love to do :battingeyelashes:

But yeah I felt the urge to stop completely at times, because of ruined relationships with girls once they found out I wore more then just their makeup and shoes. Just the stigma living in rural America can crush you, if you can't be a "good ole boy" wearing dirty t-shirts and blue jeans. I can tell you how to get your skin a pure dead white, but heaven forbid I run a tractor :eek: I might run over somebody :devil:

[Elizebeth]

I have found that life gets in the way and will make it so you don't crossdress but you will away wan't to dress just the same.

[SoTxGurl]

the real question is how does one NOT start......i use to stop everytime i dressed! Now i've just accepted it at part of my life and make the best if it..just wish my wife was remotely supportive. I'm glad to have you girls!

[Mi$$ Despair]

the real question is how does one NOT start....

I tie you up and sit you in the far corner of the mens section :tongueout

[Angie G]

Oh dear Flo I've had times in my life that dressing was out of the realm of possibility up till 4 years ago my wife never knew. When I came out to her And she accepted Angie my dressing time was very limited. Now the only place I don't wear some girlie things is at work And there has bee a few time I even did there. So hang in there hun you will find a way. Trust me it won't go away. I truly hope things work out for you Flo.And remember we are here for you girl. Love and hugs.
Angie

[mklinden2010]

After wondering for years why this particular behavior has persisted through most of my life, and wondering how to modify/control/compartmentalise/cease this, an answer has emerged.

Family, career and finances are critical. When those make demands that exceed 115% of one's waking hours, crossdressing goes like any other committed hobby.

I say I used to crossdress, with the same sadness I say I used to scuba dive, mountain climb, and do serious photography. Trying to consciously quit when time permits one to crossdress is quite impossible without excessive psychological stress. However some priorities displace it.

Flo


Flo,

That doesn't sound like an answer, that sounds like another problem.

Everybody has family, career, and financial problems at one time or another.

One thing that makes putting up with problems a bit easier is not worrying about wanting to crossdress in the midst of all that.

So, you think about it while all this stuff is going on. And, the harm is? So, you find an hour, or, a day, to do something for yourself - and you feel and function better for taking some "recreation-al time." All to the good, probably.

Crossdressing doesn't require a $75.00 green fee, a gun club membership, a rebuilt 1930s coupe to provide some distraction, relief, reassurance, pride...

Don't fight yourself and get in your way. Just tell yourself, "I'm a smart crossdresser and right now I need to do this first... But, tomorrow or next week or next Christmas, I'm gonna...."

Go ahead, make your plans.

Life is what goes on while you're making plans - you just work yours in where you can.

Good luck.

[Rachel Morley]

I think it's not so much stopping the physical aspect of the dressing as I think most of us would/could have a go at abstaining for a little while and probably be able to do quite well at it. It's the physiological pressures that are our downfall :sad:

For myself, I know that if I were to stop completely, in probably less than a month or for sure after a couple of months, I would be so desperately miserable, not to mention the mega increased levels of stress, anxiety, and irritability that for sure would happen to me because that's what happened before when I tried to stop. :sad:

There's also the frustration of "not being allowed to do something" ... when lots of others, especially GGs, would be allowed to do it. It would seem so unfair to me that just because I was born male I wouldn't be allowed to wear pretty clothes :sad:

[SoTxGurl]

I tie you up and sit you in the far corner :tongueout

And do dirty things to me............?????

[sissystephanie]

There's also the frustration of "not being allowed to do something" ... when lots of others, especially GGs, would be allowed to do it. It would seem so unfair to me that just because I was born male I wouldn't be allowed to wear pretty clothes :sad:

This exactly what I was speaking of when I mentioned in my earlier post about "YOU!" If you want to stop being a CD, why would you care about wearing pretty clothes? If you really wanted to stop, you would not even think about it!! I have said it before and will say it again!! It is YOUR LIFE, and YOU make the decisions! No one else does, unless you are a child or in a prison!

I love all you girls, but some of you have some totally illogical ideas about Crossdressing. Any CD can stop, but only if they really want to!!

[Rianna Humble]

I love all you girls, but some of you have some totally illogical ideas about Crossdressing. Any CD can stop, but only if they really want to!!

I'm sorry, but that is not borne out by reality. I fought this for nearly 45 years and even went a few years without dressing, but in the end the despair it created inside of me nearly drove me to suicide. The only way I could have made your statement true would have been to give in to that urge. So please don't tell me I could haver stopped completely if I had really wanted to.

[eluuzion]

I had a big job, big income, big car, big title, big toys, big ego.

So, Big deal :brolleyes: I just walked away one day. (over 15 years ago). I am "self-enjoyed" now and do not miss corporate america at all.

Was that a responsible decision?
I never told anyone my goal in life was to be "responsible" or follow rules and expectations. My goal has always been to just be happy...
I've been pretty successful in both of those areas, most of my life.

My philosophy has always been...
"If you have to make a choice between being responsible or being happyl...be happy."

I am thankful for all of the people who spend their lives being "responsible." They are the reason people like me get to slip between the cracks without being noticed.

So, thank you "America" I am real proud of you! :D

:love:

[erickka]

You Can't quit. I have tried, and gave up on that idea. I have come to accept the fact that it is a big part of my life, and have learned over several decades, how to keep balance in my life. Male/female is kind of the yin and yang for me, and I am relatively content in that.

[mklinden2010]

This exactly what I was speaking of when I mentioned in my earlier post about "YOU!" If you want to stop being a CD, why would you care about wearing pretty clothes? If you really wanted to stop, you would not even think about it!! I have said it before and will say it again!! It is YOUR LIFE, and YOU make the decisions! No one else does, unless you are a child or in a prison!

I love all you girls, but some of you have some totally illogical ideas about Crossdressing. Any CD can stop, but only if they really want to!!



"To be, or, not to be, that is the question..."

It was offered, in an earlier post, that, "All it takes is a little willpower!"

Yet, what is the "will" but that awareness that there are issues and choices and the knowledge that decisions must be made? What is a "failure" of will but an uncertainty about what to do? What is this "stress" but a conflict of the will itself about what to do?

Quitting crossdressing for five years without stress may be nothing more than the absence of awareness that there are issues and choices to deal with... Life goes on... Five years can fly by in our lives when we come across some set of plans we put aside - in the middle of other things - and, on seeing our dusty plans, we wonder, "Now, why didn't I do that?" Learning a language, adding that second floor, putting in that garden... Time passes, things happen the way they do, and, no stress is experienced because it doesn't occur to us that it's going to be five years... That doing anything about this thing matters so much.

It takes more than "willpower" to get anything done. It takes knowledge, it takes time, it takes money, it takes opportunity, it takes luck... The list of what it takes to get something done can be very long. Willing something to happen is only willing yourself to will it, but willing something into existence rarely works all by itself.

"If you want it bad enough, you can do it."

No, you can't - not always.

"Will" you cure cancer?

Maybe you will, but not just because you want it to happen.

Can you "will" the dead back to life?

Not when they're dead and buried.

The OP doesn't seem to lack willpower. The OP seems to lack time, money, opportunity, etc. to do everything he'd like to do.

From what he said, he's already put crossdressing aside in favor of other things.

He was, is, and probably always shall be a crossdresser of some stripe - and he knows it in his heart and mind.

He's made his choice and he's not especially happy about it.

It was done, not because he willed it, but in spite of it.

Willpower, by itself, had nothing to do with his choices.

But for deciding to post about it...

[victoriamwilliams1]

For me with work now filling the free time I once had I used to dress weekly at the most 3 times a week and now if I get 3 times a month that is a surprise! I do prefer to work so though I miss it I have to support the family!

[sherib]

I'm glad you asked? Just yesterday, my wife said to me that again that, she didn't care for me when I dressing. She also said, that it's got to be like smoking and you could quit if you wanted. This is from someone who never smoked. I tried to tell her why I can't. No matter how many times' I've purged, quit and stopped for a few months, it is impossible to competely stop. I have to dress! I was in the hospital from a couple of weeks, when I got out my legs and feet was swollen and I couldn't walk or stand, never the less I tried to put on my heels. Even as I laying in bed, I tried to put on the heels just to sit there and look at them. I was one angry, pain in the butt individual. I couldn't wait to to get out of bed and get dress. The question was, how do you stop dressing? If you really, really want to, its possible. But if you in between and can't decide where you want to be, you'll never stop. Off and on, I've dressed for over 45 years. Its never gone away. Never.

[LeeBe]

When I was a youngster I had a fascination with women's clothes, never did anything about it, guess I really did not understand what was going on inside. After marriage I finally had an opportunity to try some of those things on and then I knew what I was missing! During the time when we raising a family working and so forth there were times I did not do any dressing whatsoever for a couple of years or more. The simple answer is, life just got in the way and there were things that just needed to be done. I did not say I did not think about it! Dressing was always not far from the surface, all I would have to do is see one of my bride's outfits that I was fond of and the desires all came rushing back wishing I was the one wearing that outfit.

No doubt about it, anyone can stop, it's that simple and you don't dress. Now are you ready to deny yourself something that feels natural to you, something that gives comfort? If you do, then you will be missing something in your life that is a part of what makes you who you are and who knows what that absence will bring. I don't think I could and I would only be fooling myself if I thought any other way.

[Heidi_slave]

I empathize with the difficulties in trying to quit. The circumstances of my life make it extremely difficult to dress, and it would be easier if The Urge simply went away. Alas, that doesn't seem to be happening.

I have tried to quit, and have always had the same experience. It's like holding my breath - eventually it begins to seem like a really bad idea. In fact, each time I try to suppress The Urge it has the effect of reinforcing the behaviour. When I fight it and fail the erotic effect is so intense that I feel like another layer of my resistance gets burned away. Dressing has a strong erotic effect upon me, but feeling unable to stop dressing is somehow even more intense.

In my experience, trying to quit is a sort of cycle of mental conditioning, whereby each time I try, fail and enjoy the outcome so much that the cycle repeats itself, each time more intensely. And each time I fail to quit, I feel myself slowly becoming more helpless to resist, more feminine and more in the thrall of The Urge.

I'm not yet a peace with this side of my personality, but I can see how so many others have come to terms with the fact that this is not something that we can suppress. Resistance is futile...

Heidi

[DanaR]

...............................................

But CDing that's no hobby that’s part of who I am, been with me since the day I was born and it will still be there on my last day.

I have to agree!

Nearly every night I'll wear bra, panties, shorts and a top or a casual dress; while watching TV with my wife. It seems like my time constraints haven't allowed me the opportunities to get completely dressed and go out much lately.

[Joanne f]

They may displace it but when those things have gone it will find it`s own level again .

[Joanne f]

Although i would agree in that with willpower you can control a lot of things i think when it comes to CDing it is a bit different , there are still a lot of things that we don't understand about it , it pulls at so many different sense`s and feelings within you, and the reminder is in all aspects of daily life it would be a very hard thing to totally wipe out of your thoughts , for me it involves the way i am the way i think and feel even the way i look at things , you would have to change or block all of that so what would you be left with what is you , wearing clothes is normal so you would have to start thinking " is that shirt going to look a bit feminine" is that underwear going to look to girlie" should i not like the feel of certain things in case i feel it is to feminine , yes you can live like that but once you have tasted all these things it is very hard to deny them for yourself especially when subconsciously you know that there is no harm in it .

[Sandra Dunn]

Welcome to the family.

You are Transgender, yes crossdressers are Transgender. This is a part of who you are. Your feminne spirit seeks to express herself and she does this when you crossdress.

You, like many of us, have to figure out where the balance point is and how we can make that work in our unique situatuation. For many it is as simple as "underdressing", wearing girl undies, camioles, pantyhose and other items under our regular clothes. I have for the longest time wore womans jeans and a few of the gender nuetral tops.

In some of your activities you might find a way to crossdress while you do those activities.

One thing is most certian and that is if you try and sqealch this it will return with a vengence, depression my set in or even anger issues may arise from this squashing of your female spirit. You can go months without fully dressing and then you must. Another way to ease the need is to wear a night gown or even womens jammies when you sleep.

There are a lot of little things you can do to satisfy your feminne spirit and keep things in balance.

HUGS Sandra Dunn

[Jessica Who]

Magic?

[lemoignes]

I think that it is impossible

[wanagione]

life does get inthe way, but when i can't completly dress like when the kids re home for the summer, i stay connected to my true self by always stay sheved and always just wear panties. It helps alot.

[Tommie T.]

I think control is a more realistic approach.I do not seem to be able to stop however I can control when and how often without feeling a great deal of frustration.Under dressing often fulfills the need and is a relatively safe-barring a car accident-way of dealing with both needs or desires.I have accepted the fact that I will always be a cd,it is indeed part of my being.

[Loni]

why would one want to "quit", it is part of how we are put together. i know of no way to change this. sure you can try to suppress a part of your self.

but why? sure if you are a drunk this actively can kill and/or not just yourself.

but being a cross dresser there is no harm involved, some will never accept who you are but that is there problem to overcome.
but if a wife then it is a give and take, but not a do as i say, or there is nothing.

tough choices in life and can only be made by each of us as needed in our lives.
but for me i see no need or reason to slow down let alone stop.
if one has problem in there life you can put away in boxes your "other" life...but only for so long and she will burst out in full bloom.


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[sometimes_miss]

It really depends upon to what extent you are willing to go to suppress the desire to crossdress. I've read a few studies that had temporary success with electro shock therapy, but that kind of destroys other brain functions a bit as well, so you can wind up being a little dumber and less functional. And, you have to continue to go back for more treatments. There wasn't much information about long term patients, just that the treatments temporarily removed the desire to crossdress. IIRC, it works by destroying memories and I guess thought processes involved in the desire, but it's not selective, and you lose memories of everything else as well. What prevented me from ever trying it was seeing patients who had multiple ECT treatments; they all looked like mindless zombies, barely able to function at all, and were for the most part, not unhappy, but didn't seem to express any emotion at all, not happy either. BTW, those folks were almost all institutionalized. The few that weren't were dependent on relatives to take care of them once their thinking abilities were diminished.

I don't know the current state of ECT; perhaps it has gotten better, but I wouldn't bet my brain on it.

CD'ing stops when we're dead. But that's it. There is no other guaranteed 'cure'.

[PretzelGirl]

Wow. How long ago did you see these Electro Shock patients? It has been the same since the 70's and does not create zombies. Movies way over-depict the treatment (called ECT, electro convulsive therapy). They don't have to be strapped down. They don't flop on the table. It is used a lot for depression. And the only brain function that is affected is short term memory around the period of the treatment.

I haven't heard of this treatment being used for crossdressing. I tried a few google searches and only came up with this thread. So if it is used to treat crossdressing, no one is writing about it (or I didn't pick the right search terms).