What other areas does cd'ing affect?

[AKAMichelle]

I have read a lot of posts that talk about our style of clothing. How some of us like business suits or professional outfits. While others take a more laid back approach to our style.

Recently, it has been hitting me that I am free to decorate my house the way I want. All of these years I have let my wife decorate and with the divorce it is my turn. So here is the question: Do you find your feminine side changing how you do other things in life - not related to clothing choices?

I guess I will start it off by stating that I am preparing to buy a new bed frame and I picked a very nice and ornanate wrought iron bed frame. When I showed a friend of mine, she was a little surprised that a guy would be interested in that bed frame. It was definitely something my wife would have picked out, but this was me (a guy). I hate to show my friend the bed spread that I am also considering buying. That would be a dead giveaway that something is different about me. Now I have to wonder what a woman would think seeing a more feminine bed spread and frame in a bachelor's pad. The other question that I have is - would having a feminine bed spread and frame cause a woman to be suspicious immediately that I was a cd'er.

[NathalieX66]

zzzzzzzzzzzz.

Do I have permission on this forum to be frank and open?

My grandfather was a pretty macho and authoritative Italian guy....yet his passion was planting a zillion flowers of every kind, and doing all the cooking. We should all know by now that there are no absolutes, and plenty of non-stereotypes. Humanity is much too varied. It is what it is.....jeez I''m getting sick of that statement. :dh2:

[eluuzion]

"Do you find your feminine side changing how you do other things in life - not related to clothing choices?"

Well, let me put it this way...I have always had a
studio in my house for artwork and projects. I used to make furniture and art glass sculptures. Now I spend my time experimenting with platinum cure silicone, making breast forms and other items...:heehee:


"Now I have to wonder what a woman would think seeing a more feminine bed spread and frame in a bachelor's pad. The other question that I have is - would having a feminine bed spread and frame cause a woman to be suspicious immediately that I was a cd'er."

Women are like competitive bloodhounds, lol. In both cases... I think the first thoughts would be suspecting you had (or have) recent intimate ties with another woman. Or you are recently divorced and ended up with the bed in the divorce split.
The next thoughts would be thinking you could possibly be "gay". I do not think "CD" is something that pops into a woman's mind in that scenario. Unless one of your high heels is poking out from under the bed...:love:

[LaurenEP]

I will select or, customize, female characters in games. Xenia in Goldeneye, The Princess in Mario Kart, etc. If I played WoW, I'd have a female character. Though I'm not really a fan of Barbie, I saw a Barbie keychain I wanted recently because I liked her outfit. But instead, I bought an Iron Man because it was my favorite armor design. (If anyone else is a fan, it's the armor Stark built to deal with Firepower in v1 issue 231. The first red-and-gold after the red-and-silver was destroyed.)

Wow. What contrasts in my tastes.

[abigail43]

If you want to be femme then why not just be out there with it !or are you happy with deceiving women? If she is your friend then why not let her know or do you fancy this woman secretly ?

[SuzanneBender]

I don't think CDing effects other aspects of my life. I think my femininity is expressed in other aspects. I love to decorate. I look at a room and ideas bounce into my head. I wouldn't say they are femme or masculine just my style. Although when friends come over to our house and my wife explains to them that I decorated a room, it does raise an eyebrow or two.

I also choose the women characters in games. Its silly but fun. My guitar hero world tour charter is an 80's rocker named Chicky La Legs. Its kinda cool living out two fantasies at once. The other day I quickly put back Lady Peacock while playing Clue with the family after receive a stern look from my wife. I have to admit though that COL Mustard is pretty cool.

[April Renee]

You could just tell her the bedding was on sale and couldn't pass up a good deal..Katt Williams once said the satin sheets on his bed wasn't for him but for the Ladies that stayed the night, so maybe keep that in mind too. As far as decorating our home is neither fem or masc, we don't have a style other than contemporary and clean.
.
A

[ReineD]

Michelle, if you get so close to a woman that she goes into your bedroom, then you should come clean with her if she wonders why the feminine decor. Just tell her that you like to be girly. :)

[Marissa]

Recently, it has been hitting me that I am free to decorate my house the way I want. All of these years I have let my wife decorate and with the divorce it is my turn. So here is the question: Do you find your feminine side changing how you do other things in life - not related to clothing choices?

Now I have to wonder what a woman would think seeing a more feminine bed spread and frame in a bachelor's pad. The other question that I have is - would having a feminine bed spread and frame cause a woman to be suspicious immediately that I was a cd'er.

Michelle.. I feel for you..as I have been mulling about the same thing.. I do think that once we allow ourselves to delve into who we are (or think we are), that it does change our outlook and may have some impact on allowing our fem side change how we do things in parts of our lives.

Now someone who has been dressing (discreetly or otherwise) for longer period of time, may have not noticed the suttle changes.. for instance, I have always crossed my leg in a 'guy's' manner.. unless dressed..but now I'm feeling more comfortable crossing my legs as I would if dressed. Course at times i sense this in drab and may alter, depending on surroundings.

Okay back to story at hand.. I relate to this since I also allowed (yeah sure..whatever..:eek:) my wife at the time to decorate our 3 homes we shared. Each time, you can see it was more of a woman's room.. somewhere in the far corner was a part of me..the man.. With each move I noticed less of me, versus her decor.. which i was fine with.. sort of..

The final home (my current one), she put alot of purple in the room.. comforter, draps, Cher poster, purple boa.. It was a woman's room.. even though I worked a majority of my time away from home for months at a time.. it was nicely done and I began to also love the color purple..

With our divorce and her taking all items of the bedroom.. (it was agreed, k? :D) and I transferred work too, I now had the same idea of reinventing the bedroom in the same manner as she had it, with all the purple and decorative things..

But I have that same stigma of wondering what would be thought of me if a woman or man (especially male family members) sees how its decorated..

Sure some of the explainations given (ex-wife stuff, etc) would normally work..but when all know she took it all so it had to be my ideas..

Sorry, didn't mean to make this so drawn out..but its not always so easy to say "just do it"...

So yes, I want my John Wayne entrance, my career/office, my music room..but i want my purple bedroom, green/brown bath.. and my messy closet... :D

Hugs,

[AKAMichelle]

Michelle, if you get so close to a woman that she goes into your bedroom, then you should come clean with her if she wonders why the feminine decor. Just tell her that you like to be girly. :)

That is what I plan on. But it struck me odd because I had never really thought about it, but a lot of things have changed over the years. The feminine side is there even in areas that I don't understand why. The decorating is just one of those areas.

I lied to my wife for 24 years and I will never make that mistake again. If I am too afraid to tell the person that I am a cd'er, then they have no business being that close to me.

[Sarah Doepner]

I don't know if the cooking, laundry and decorating I do are a manifestation of my feminine tastes. Actually the decorating I've done has been pretty much what a guy would do in the front room anyway. I'll have to ask my bride what she thinks on this because I'm too close to the question and don't know any more what I'm showing with my choices.


The other day I quickly put back Lady Peacock while playing Clue with the family after receive a stern look from my wife. I have to admit though that COL Mustard is pretty cool.

Suzanne, Col. Mustard has always been my favorite, followed by Miss Scarlet if someone else took the Col., but that usually doesn't happen.

[Babette]

[QUOTE=AKAMichelle;2206654] So here is the question: Do you find your feminine side changing how you do other things in life - not related to clothing choices?

Michelle, I'm not sure that I have changed anything. I suppose that I have been much the same throughout my life. My wife definitely has a talent for decorating and fashion (e.g. my wardrobe), while I have always had a flair for artistic design and creativity. As much as I love to include my artsy-fartsy stuff, her "touch" to the final effect is unmistakable. I suppose you could say our home decor is a collaborative effort. If something were to dissolve our relationship (heaven forbid), I suppose the survivor would carry on much the same.


The other question that I have is - would having a feminine bed spread and frame cause a woman to be suspicious immediately that I was a cd'er.

Probably not as much as the shaved legs, plucked eyebrows, and a closet full of female apparel. All kidding aside, the answer to you question will depend on the woman involved. I know people that jump to all sorts of conclusions with any provocation. Surely there are others at the opposite extreme. Sometimes it's fun to leave people guessing. Maybe if they are interested in your true persona, they will be attracted to the mystery.

Babette