Tattoo or not to tattoo

[Pokergal420]

Hi everyone

I want to get a lower back tattoo. I have the design in mind I want, it is totally girly. I have been wanting to get it for about a year. But I am just hesitating because it is a big commitment. I have grown my hair and color it, pierced me ears and belly, but all the is reversible. I am just wondering if it is pink fog, how long should i wait? I am in my mid 20's so now is the best time to get it and enjoy it. I have been with the same girl for 4 years now and she is not for it or against it, but 6 months ago she said she would be fine with it, it was my body. But she only wants me to get one. What if we break up, will another girl take me with that tattoo? Any thoughts?

[April Renee]

You should have just done it six months ago when it came up. If you do it and decide in the future you don't like it or someone new comes into your life you can alter it or do a cover up design, but then again nobody else HAS to see it no matter how "girly" it is.
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April

[Megan Thomas]

if you have to ask I would say you're not ready for it.

Speaking personally, I would never date someone with a tattoo because I don't like tattoos. In fact, I have turned down dates in the past for that reason. That might seem a bit hypocritical coming from someone who crossdresses, but then i I have lost out in relationships with girls who didn't like the CD'ing.

As long as you are prepared to live with your choices then do what you will, but remember those choices no longer exist once you make them in regards to a tattoo.

Good luck whatever you choose to do :)

[Billijo49504]

You're 25, think about it will look in another 25 or 30 yrs? JMHO...BJ

[Alice Torn]

Please don't go along with the "tattoo fog!" You will regret it later. Too bad they don' make temporary ones!

[April Renee]

QUOTE=Billijo49504;You're 25, think about it will look in another 25 or 30 yrs? JMHO...BJ.
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Well, if the Tattoo artist is any good and the quality of the INK used is good it should look pretty much the same in 25 years. Myself, I've had one of my tats for 21 years and aside from a little color fade it still looks the same. The perception of how it will look is based upon the old ways,equipment and old ink used in the past. The artist doesn't want to give any "bad" tat jobs; they earn their living doing it and the work is represented on a live canvas that also can be used as advertisement..
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Imho.....
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April

[KristinSkye]

That's a tough one...but if you've been on the fence about it for over six months without committing to getting it done I would say it probably isn't for the best (and that's coming from someone who has five tattoos, both nipples, tongue and navel pierced).

I can completely see why you would want to get a lower back piece as it is one of the most feminine areas to get a tattoo (trust me, the thought has crossed my mind ;). But, it sounds like you're still finding yourself and even though you feel that it would work for your now and going into the future that might not actually be the case.

Having said that it is pretty awesome that your current SO is cool with it. Have you thought about getting a henna temporary tattoo done? That way you could have fun with it for 2-3 weeks then not have to worry about having permanent "buyers remorse" :P

[Miley]

Personally, I would never get a tattoo, even if it is a girlie one, I think they look bad on girls. Not only that but once it is there it will remain and if you are not able to decide now then I would say thats a no! People change, I once had a friend who was a tattoo artist, I could of had anything done for next to nothing but was unable to decide what I wanted, long story short, After 1 Year I was a very different person and was so thankful I never did it. thats my :2c:

[Megan Thomas]

There's an old english saying I often think about when I'm of 2 minds:

When in doubt do now't (nothing).

:)

[BobbiU]

If you've been thinking about it for 6 months, and you're not sure, and you're not sure if this relationship is permanent, ask yourself would you be happy with it, if you broke up with her, and were single again. Especially if it's a girly tattoo, are you going to be comfortable being out in public with it in the singles scene again? My feeling is that you might want to wait until you get a little more direction as far as your relationship. Sounds like you have a cool relationship now, and a great SO to allow you to enjoy your CDing experience so much ! :)

[Shananigans]

As others have said, if you have to ask....don't get it.

Haha if you want to play around with the look though, get a professional temporary tattoo. I think one spring break I had a certain butterfly temporarily tattooed on my lower back...

...One week with that tattoo and I decided I didn't really want it. Thank God.

[Jennifer in CO]

Long time ago (on our honeymoon actually), my wife and I got matching roses on our ankles. They weren't "tattoo's per say...but a surface dye similar to henna. We thought it was just a paint and figured they 'd be gone in a few weeks. Six months later they were pretty much gone but both were visible (if you knew where to look) almost a year later. They weren't small, about 3" in length with the rosebud about an inch in diameter. It allowed us two things - one it allowed us to try and find out we decided we didn't like tattoos all that much, and two, it was a pretty girly thing we constantly kidded each other about for almost a year.

Jenn

[BRANDYJ]

My youngest brother owns a very successful tattoo shop in the Carolinas. Oddly enough, he does not have a tattoo on his body. Personally, I don't care for them and would not get one. But to each his/her own.

[Pokergal420]

Thanks for the advice, guess I will not get it, yet. I waited this long to make sure it wasn't just an impulse. So I will wait longer. I dont really care what people think. I already get all sorts of weird looks and shit from my friends, and even compliments from strangers about my nail polish and hair. I am a little shyer with people I know then strangers.

The reason I want the tattoo is as a symbol of me accepting this part of myself, and never deny myself who I really am. I have thought of all the places and that is the best for all the reasons girls normally get it, easily hide able, doesnt change much over time/weight, and is in my opinion very cute and says something bold and unique about me as a guy. Most people are ashamed of crossdressing, this is my way of not being on of them. I will probably marry this girl, and she is not too keen on a tattoo so I want to get one before she changes her mind. She hates needles, and would never get a tattoo, she almost passed out when we got our belly buttons pierced.

[Megan Thomas]

The reason I want the tattoo is as a symbol of me accepting this part of myself, and never deny myself who I really am.

I have to question whether a tattoo is really the best way of never denying who you are. I would say to live who you are is the ultimate way of not denying who you are. :2c:

[Dee Baker]

I am currently having laser tattoo removal for tattoo that I got about 30 years ago, its much more expensive and takes much more time than the tattoo but I am so glad that we now have the technology to remove the ink.

The laser breaks down the ink so that the blood can carry it away to the liver to deal with. Makes me wonder what impact that will have on my liver.

My son asked me a couple of years ago about tattoos. His friend was going to get a tattoo and offered to pay for him to get one too. I told him that was one thing I wish I had never done and that I wished I could get rid of mine (that was before I started my laser treatment). I was so pleased and so proud of him when he called a week later and told me that he decided to not get a tattoo.

Dee

[Rachel Morley]

As others have said, if you have to ask....don't get it.

Haha if you want to play around with the look though, get a professional temporary tattoo. I think one spring break I had a certain butterfly temporarily tattooed on my lower back...

...One week with that tattoo and I decided I didn't really want it. Thank God.
:iagree: with Shananigans. I can't tell you how many times in my life in the last 25 years I have considered a tattoo, and depending on my frame of mind at the time I was thinking about all sorts of things from uber feminine ones to macho guy ones. Today, I am glad I didn't succumb to temptation as if I had gone with the uber feminine ones then in the locker room of my gym I might feel a little shy with my top off and if I had gone with a more male one when I'm wearing an off the shoulder or sleeveless dress that would have ruined my whole look. Caution required! :2c:

[Anna Maria]

There's an old english saying I often think about when I'm of 2 minds:

When in doubt do now't (nothing).

:)
Wise words from up North. Also think to future as others have said.

[eluuzion]

I am not opposed to others doing whatever makes em' feel "right".

But tatoos and body decorations are just not for me. I cannot think of anything I could "etch" into or onto my body with the confidence that I would have no regrets at some point in the future.

But, that's just me...

[jessica renee]

I wouldn't do it. Like others have said, if you do think that you want to, get a temporary one first to make sure you like it and it's really what you want.

[KristinSkye]

I have to question whether a tattoo is really the best way of never denying who you are. I would say to live who you are is the ultimate way of not denying who you are. :2c:

I agree with you to a point; however, for many people, tattoos truly are a pure representation of self. If that is how you really feel about it Pokergal420 I can totally respect that. Let us know what you end up doing :hugs:

[Joanie_Shakti]

Last Christmas at 50 years old, I got a tattoo. When I was younger, I thought they were cool but as they became more of a fad, I started to dislike them, especially on women. I"m really not sure what finally compelled me to get one. And compelled is a good description as I was obsessed about it. I think it was partly a feminization hypnosis track I listen to. The hypnotist says to get a butterfly tattoo. Well, I resisted the suggestion, especially for something obviously feminine. But I eventually came around to the idea of some sort of feminine tattoo.

I am a meditator and had recently started to become enthralled with the goddess concept. I started thinking of ways to invoke and honor the goddess in me. My first thought was a "Sri Yantra," and while I was searching for images during a lull at work one day, I heard my teacher's voice chanting the sound for the Yantra, "Shreem." A coworker was watching a video of the teacher, having no idea who he was.

I took this as a sign. Unfortunatley, the yantra would not have turned out well for the small size I wanted. So after more thought, I got Three Sanskrit words tattooed on my hip, "Om Shreem Namaha." Goddess oriented, in a unisex, if not feminine spot, and in a place where no one will see it unless I show it to them.

I was pumped after getting it. I can see how tattoos are addictive to some people. It's now a little over seven months since I got it and it's in a spot where I don't see it all of the time. So when I see it in a mirror, I think, "Oh yeah, I did that." If I'm feeling good about myself at the time, I think, "that's kind of cool." But if I'm not, I wonder what compelled me to do this. It's not actual regret that it was done, but kind of "what was I thinking."

I bought special transfer paper to print out my designs and try out the size and placement on my body before I opted for the permanent one, so there was a lot of thought involved. And though I already had an idea for a second one while in the chair getting the first one, I don't think I'll do it anytime soon. But, because of how I felt after the process, if they could do it in disappearing ink, where it would be gone without a trace within six months to a year, I think I would be a regular customer at the tattoo parlour.

I agree with other posters here, if after six months you're still not sure, then I wouldn't get it. In the meantime, you could try out the transfer paper I used from http://www.tattoojohnny.com/test_drive. You print your design in a reverse image on this paper with an inkjet printer, then transfer it to your skin. It doesn't last as well as the commercial temporary tattoos, if it gets wet, the ink will run, but it gives you a chance to try out different designs and sizes to see if there is one that you really, really want to etch onto your body.

[RachelPortugal]

Why not consider a temporary tattoo. I saw an advert in the UK 8 years ago for "Temptoos". They are more permanent than the henna inks as they fade in about 7 years. So you need not worry about how it will look in 25 - 30 years, no need for expensive laser surgery to remove it. If you split form your current girlfriend, then any new girlfriend who does not appreciate it may be reassured if she knows it is not permanent.

[Laurie909]

I agree with you to a point; however, for many people, tattoos truly are a pure representation of self.

I guess I lost any desire to get any tattoos when I saw a man and a woman, husband and wife in their late 70s, who had tattoos on their wrists. Numbers put there when they were in a German concentration camp.

[Samantha Girl]

Just because Pokergal420 isn't sure and has been contemplating this decision for a while does NOT mean they shouldn't get it, or that by inaction they've made a decision not to. Getting a tattoo is a very personal decision. Everyone who gets one should absolutely contemplate the decision for a while. It is not a simple choice.

BTW I honestly wouldn't worry about the possibility of future women you may be involved with not liking it. It will be on your back, and even during naughty playtime it's still on your back, mostly unseen ;)

Full disclosure I am somewhat biased on this subject since I've had one since 2006 and just got a new one 2 weeks ago. Cat, my girl has 3. The stigma of having a tattoo in society is not what it used to be.

Another point I totally disagree with is the idea that having a tattoo is not feminine. First off, for a crossdresser to say that is a bit ridiculous. Really? You're really going to say having a tattoo is masculine? I have met many more women who have tatoos then men. Like myself, I find the whole thing pretty genderless at this point. Also, some of us find others, both men & women, with tattoos to be very sexy.

When I was in high school a lot of my friends got really crappy & cheap tatoos. It put me off them, even though I always wanted one and was always being pressured to get one. Instead I got one when I was 30 years old, when I knew exactly what I wanted, something very meaningful to me, and I had friends who new GOOD tattoo artists to send me to.

So I say contemplate all you want, get it, don't get it. Do what YOU want. Remember, no one will see it unless you want them to :) Good luck with your decision Pokergal420 ;)

[Megan Thomas]

The stigma of having a tattoo in society is not what it used to be.

Fashions come and go. No guarantee a stigma won't return :2c:

[Samantha Girl]

are we really supposed to live our lives worrying what other people think? I honestly don't care what society thinks, it's just a factor in most people's decision to get a tattoo. I happen to believe (wrongly perhaps) that society continues to get more progressive. And being that so many more people get tattoos these days almost ensures the stigma will not return for some time if ever. Also I don't think it's a fad, people have been getting tattoos for centuries, not sure what fashion has to do with it. Most people don't get a tattoo cause it's fashionable. It's usually much deeper than that. I love dressing like a woman, but I don't check Cosmo to see if what I'm wearing is in or not.

I was taught from a very early age to basically live in fear of what people thought of me (thanks Mom) and I've been working on purging all that crap, almost done. I don't think it benefits anyone to make decisions based on fear. Sorry if I seem a bit harsh on the subject. But what it comes down to is people fearing and forming opinions of what they don't understand. I don't base my decisions on people like that and I don't judge people because they are different.

If having tattoos makes others judge me so be it. Cause if that's what they are judging me on I have no interest in knowing them anyway :)

One last point, Pokergal wants to get it on their back... society is not really involved in this equation(I know I brought it up), no one will ever see it if Pokergal doesn't want them to.

[KristinSkye]

I was taught from a very early age to basically live in fear of what people thought of me (thanks Mom) and I've been working on purging all that crap, almost done. I don't think it benefits anyone to make decisions based on fear.

If having tattoos makes others judge me so be it. Cause if that's what they are judging me on I have no interest in knowing them anyway :)
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You go girl! Best post yet IMHO.

[Samantha Girl]

Aaaw thanks Kristin, you are sweet! I am a bit opinionated :devil:

[Megan Thomas]

are we really supposed to live our lives worrying what other people think?

I sincerely hope not.


And being that so many more people get tattoos these days almost ensures the stigma will not return for some time if ever.

Actually... I'd love to see some honest statistics for this because i don't believe it's as widespread as people think. If you put enough bankers in a room you will get the opinion the room is full of bankers... :heehee:


Also I don't think it's a fad

Time will tell :)


I don't think it benefits anyone to make decisions based on fear. Sorry if I seem a bit harsh on the subject. But what it comes down to is people fearing and forming opinions of what they don't understand. I don't base my decisions on people like that and I don't judge people because they are different.

I don't judge people on anything except how they interact with me. I might not like tattoos but i'll defend anyones right to have one. But that doesn't mean I will think they look great or will stand the test of time. Historically, tattoos have always ended up looking 'tired' after a number of years. That's just the way it is, a simple fact.


One last point, Pokergal wants to get it on their back... society is not really involved in this equation(I know I brought it up), no one will ever see it if Pokergal doesn't want them to.

Tell that to the medical world who may be called upon to treat her. As an aside, tell that to the men who emblazon their backs and then walk around topless. I accept your point to a degree, but it's not as definitive as you would make out ;)

There is one good aspect to visible tattoos though - it makes my job one heck of a lot easier when I need to identify people :D

[Samantha Girl]

Glad we agree on something :p

1st point, I actually know a lot of people from very different walks of life, different idealogies, etc who have tattoos. People you wouldn't think have them, not everyone tells people they have them and they go unseen. I'd love to see some stats too

2nd point, you didn't dispute what I said, it's been centuries people have been getting tattoos, time has already told :)

3rd point. I appreciate your defending freedom of speech, nice. But that last line is not supported. Older tattoos used different ink and different needles then the modern ones. Newer tattoos don't fade as quickly and there are newer techniques to strenthen the ink/skin bond. Also after care of one's new tattoo is always a top priority because it helps you heal better and helps the tattoo not fade as much over time. Plus most people serious about it (and who can afford it) have their tattoos re inked after so many years/decades if they feel it necessary.

4th point. What does that matter if his doctor or nurse sees it. Who are they to judge and why would they automatically judge someone harshly with a tattoo? You don't know that they would, but you seem to assume they would. You are right in the sense that if it bothered PokerGal for a medical professional to see that tattoo, then she probably shouldn't get it, that's all I'll give you. People, guys in particular, the kinda guy who would go walking around shirtless are NOT worried about someone judging their naked skin, belly, tattoos or whatever they've got, don't see what that was supposed to mean? I mean it was funny, but it didn't make a point as far as I could tell :p

I understand if you don't like tattoos, don't think they are attractive, hey that's cool. It's just the way you talk about it is the way my Mom talks about it. She still thinks a tattoo means something negative, but she's almost 70 years old and knows nothing about them in 2010. You seem to think on the whole that they are still perceived as negative and will mostly be seen as negative. You are greatly mistaken on this. I think you perceive them as negative and are projecting that, it's not that simple. Maybe it used to be, but not anymore

OK, I'm done now! Gotta go rub lotion on my new tattoo :D

[MsJenna]

Pokergal, it is really up to you to decide what you want out of this life. The suggestions of temporary tats are good ones, but you ultimately need to do what you want for yourself.

And, for the record, I have three tattoos. They are on my upper arms and back and are not seen unless I wish it. I got the first one over 18 years ago, and except for the color fading a bit, it still looks exactly the same as when I got it. And I am not done yet, :)

Just my :2c:

Jenna

[sometimes_miss]

Never understood girls with tattoos. Pretty jewelry is way more feminine than any tattoo. And if you get tired of it, you can always sell it. I've never seen a tattoo that was pretty. It's all just dull ink on skin. Can't compare to gold, silver, and diamonds. But, whatever floats your boat. My opinion is that you're on the fence, and want other people to tell you how hot or sexy a girly tattoo will be on your back, or that you will be able to feel girly privately when in public dressed as a guy, because you know you have something girly underneath, much the same way people who under dress do.
Screw the tattoo. Wear a pretty gold, slightly girly necklace with a dangling heart on it. Maybe with your GF's initials in the middle, or something.

[Megan Thomas]

Glad we agree on something :p

1st point [snip]

2nd point [snip]

3rd point [snip]

4th point [snip]

I can see you're into point scoring which i'm not. I responded with opinion and views from one side of the fence.


OK, I'm done now! Gotta go rub lotion on my new tattoo :D

Clearly you're on the other side of the fence, and biased in favour of tattoos.

Let's agree to disagree and leave Pokergal to her own choices :)

[Samantha Girl]

We were going back and forth point by point, I thought it was fun. It wasn't meant to be a contest per se. However your posts just struck me as being very negative about tattoos without being completely informed about them. Obviously I am biased about tattoos, I said as much in my first post :)

Agree to disagree ;)

[Megan Thomas]

Agree to disagree ;)

Works for me ;)

[Missy]

can it be removed if you find out you do not like
i saw a guy on tv for a beer comp and they made fun of him
i would say do not get it if it can not be removed easily

[christiek]

There are a number of good people giving good advice in this thread. In the end its all up to you and what you want. Just remember they are permanent and it takes a very harsh surgery to remove them (or you could burn them off). I personally love ink and metal both. I have 15 piercings and a single tattoo at this point in my life. I already have my next tat picked out and when I can afford it I will be getting it. (my friend is a tattoo artist so it wont take much for me to get it done). All I can say is take the time to think about it and make sure you are making the right decision.

[Victoria Anne]

I have not read the responses to your thread but I can tell you I have 7 tats and they are the biggest mistake I ever made as a young person Dont you will regret it later and then it will cost you a fortune to get rid of it , to give you an idea I spent $500 in the early 80's to get them and now to get rid of them it is going to cost ... are you ready ... over $5000 ! Think hard , I would suggest you dont , tats are a fad now later it will go against you.