sandra-leigh
08-11-2010, 03:44 PM
The reaction I got to me being me last night was completely different than the reaction I got to me being me today.
Last night was our club meeting night, located an easy enough walk from where I work. As there was a gentle rain, I took the connecting "sky-walk" between buildings to get closer to my destination. I was not dressed up yet, so I had my usual below-the-shoulder hair, white jean-leggings, a light blue top, C-ish forms, dangle earrings, black shoes (not heels), and was carrying my big muti-colored bag (really a purse). When I got to one point between an active building and a now-declining shopping centre, there were a group of roughly 8 boys, probably around grade 11 I estimate. As I walked through, the closest one to me started calling me a "fag" and gay and a "homo" and a c***-sucker, and telling me he wanted to kick my ass; another of the boys called me a "flaming homosexual". I was momentarily tempted to say to the leader, "It takes one to know one", but instead I simply didn't bother acknowleging them and walked through.
Today... I had an appointment with my GP, at my local shopping center. I had to dash out of the house to get the bus, but as soon as I got to the center I changed into a linen dress and put in (the same) forms and went to my appointment that way -- yes, waiting in the waiting room as "a guy in a dress". I then went to one of the boutiques in the mall where they know me by name and browsed and bought a couple of items. The person who decides what discounts to give to regular customers and friends didn't happen to be in, so they handed the items over to me and told me to come back and pay another time -- yes, they trusted me with about $125 of merchandise.
After I had finished trying on the items I had changed back to my work clothes to head to work, so once more I was wearing the white jean leggings, a (different) blue top, (the same) forms, the same dangle earrings, and carrying my big multi-coloured bag/purse, but blue sandals this time. I went into the drug store and picked up some random items, and had to wait some extra time at the cash as the woman ahead of me was slow in moving her cart. While I was waiting, I glanced around a few times, in particular with direct face-to-face looks briefly exchanged with the male to one side. I did speak to the cashier in my normal voice ("No bag, thanks").
After I paid the cashier and moved up a bit to put my items in my bag, a disagreement broke out between the two people in line behind me as to which of them was first. And here's the interesting part: both of them, the male and the woman, spoke in terms of having been the first in line "behind this lady" -- "this lady" referring to me. Both of them used "lady" at least twice in referring to me and neither of them changed the noun as they continued the disagreement. The woman had perhaps not seen me clearly but the guy had, I don't know if the woman "read" me or not; if she did, she must have been relatively sensitive or practiced, in that there was no hesitation in her use of the noun, just someone upset about someone else butting into line and reacting without thinking about the word choice.
So last night I'm scum to be insulted and threatened, and today I'm a "lady" without even trying. What a ride, eh?
Last night was our club meeting night, located an easy enough walk from where I work. As there was a gentle rain, I took the connecting "sky-walk" between buildings to get closer to my destination. I was not dressed up yet, so I had my usual below-the-shoulder hair, white jean-leggings, a light blue top, C-ish forms, dangle earrings, black shoes (not heels), and was carrying my big muti-colored bag (really a purse). When I got to one point between an active building and a now-declining shopping centre, there were a group of roughly 8 boys, probably around grade 11 I estimate. As I walked through, the closest one to me started calling me a "fag" and gay and a "homo" and a c***-sucker, and telling me he wanted to kick my ass; another of the boys called me a "flaming homosexual". I was momentarily tempted to say to the leader, "It takes one to know one", but instead I simply didn't bother acknowleging them and walked through.
Today... I had an appointment with my GP, at my local shopping center. I had to dash out of the house to get the bus, but as soon as I got to the center I changed into a linen dress and put in (the same) forms and went to my appointment that way -- yes, waiting in the waiting room as "a guy in a dress". I then went to one of the boutiques in the mall where they know me by name and browsed and bought a couple of items. The person who decides what discounts to give to regular customers and friends didn't happen to be in, so they handed the items over to me and told me to come back and pay another time -- yes, they trusted me with about $125 of merchandise.
After I had finished trying on the items I had changed back to my work clothes to head to work, so once more I was wearing the white jean leggings, a (different) blue top, (the same) forms, the same dangle earrings, and carrying my big multi-coloured bag/purse, but blue sandals this time. I went into the drug store and picked up some random items, and had to wait some extra time at the cash as the woman ahead of me was slow in moving her cart. While I was waiting, I glanced around a few times, in particular with direct face-to-face looks briefly exchanged with the male to one side. I did speak to the cashier in my normal voice ("No bag, thanks").
After I paid the cashier and moved up a bit to put my items in my bag, a disagreement broke out between the two people in line behind me as to which of them was first. And here's the interesting part: both of them, the male and the woman, spoke in terms of having been the first in line "behind this lady" -- "this lady" referring to me. Both of them used "lady" at least twice in referring to me and neither of them changed the noun as they continued the disagreement. The woman had perhaps not seen me clearly but the guy had, I don't know if the woman "read" me or not; if she did, she must have been relatively sensitive or practiced, in that there was no hesitation in her use of the noun, just someone upset about someone else butting into line and reacting without thinking about the word choice.
So last night I'm scum to be insulted and threatened, and today I'm a "lady" without even trying. What a ride, eh?