Acceptance, well not quite!!

[Gillian]

For those with suspecting / unco-operative partners.
As you know I got busted by my wife who has "known" for a very very long time but always denied and never wanted to talk. well last night at dinner a couple of little sarcastic remarks had been made to me, and I felt I had to bring the subject up again after our child was off to bed. So I did and this time my wife used different language to before, she spoke of coming to accept the situation. Nothing more she still loathes the idea and things it's "sick" but I know this is real progress for my personal situation!

She has accepted that I will continue now and she can't stop me, so I feel a huge sense of calmness that she isn;t going to do anything stupid or rash now and that in the times I am given alone, as she knows what I am doing she will give me a little more leeway, I think!

It may finally signal a chance for me to increase my own clothing from a single blouse as I really want to get a bra forms skirts and a dress but have never ever dared due to hiding issues. But this is still a long way aways as I still need to get more acceptance of the brader issues from her first, but! I am so looking forward to tomorrow with a renewed passion to be transformed as Gillian in much more real terms than ever before.

[Angie G]

That's great news Gillian. Just don't get carried away so fast that it bits you in the backside hun GO SLOW.Good luck with more progress. I wish you all the bast Gillian.:hugs:
Angie

[Rianna Humble]

I'm so pleased for you Gillian! After the lousy time you've had with recent events, you deserve some good news.

[Gillian]

Thanks guys, I know it will never be full on dressed together acceptance but for right now, my SO knows I shall be dressing as soon as she leaves, and going drab before she returns. She still cannot fathom the why part (well neither can I actually) or the impact extra to our marriage.

BUT, and this is an update, today I have enjoyed my family time far more and far deeper than in years, I did all the maintenence on her car needed did the lawn etc etc and feel totally different inside to I normally do. I don't know why however, have not got that far but I feel so calm happy and :drink:after two large beer's relaxed :o

I am not the kind to rush things though I am noping this cease fire may result in my being allowed clothes of my own? if I can get to that point Gillian will have a live game plan if not she remains my secret alter ego!

[JenniferR771]

Keep trying to explain yourself, Gillian. My wife has known for years, yet strongly disapproves--left over homophobia, perhaps. Recently she moved 4 of my dresses out to my outside storage barn. My wigs, shoes, makeup, jewelry, and lingerie are there in storage also. But she knows that when she leaves for church, I will dress and take photos. No problem, if I am drab when she returns.

[Gillian]

Hi Jennifer, I think we are in a very similar position but, for one detail. My SO has not found my stash as it is quite small well contained and looks totally innocuous, I dread if she did find it as it is a "woman in a bag" kit just add skirt and blouse!

I have very low expectation's of where my new found position will lead. The one thing I didn't disclose yet to you girls was that as I have a big smoking fetish as a girl only, my wife knows about this aspect and last night, has made me promise not to smoke in the home! Long story about the smoking won't burden you all.

Now she knows I dress, and moreover also that I love smoke but only ever as Gillian.

My feeling is quite honest that I will take each development as it comes cross every line and walk with my head tall, as I truly am not embarrassed of who Gillian is or who my male self is, for once.

[AKAMichelle]

Everything starts with one little step. Sounds like you just experienced that one little step.

[Gillian]

Everything starts with one little step. Sounds like you just experienced that one little step.#

Thanks Michelle yes I understand perfectly, for once, I tink I might have :hugs:

[Billijo49504]

Here's a idea, ask her if she would like to go girl shoppin together, for both of you. And make sure you spend more on her than you. But have her help you pick out a couple things. JMHO...BJ

[KristinSkye]

Congratulations Gillian, that's great news! :hugs:

It sounds like getting everything out there on the table has lifted a huge weight off of your shoulders hence the bubbly feeling.


Passing along some advice that was given to me when I came out to my wife in January: take things very slow with your wife as far as involving her with your dressing. The last thing you want is for her to get overwhelmed and go back into her shell.

From the sound of it it looks like you already have the right attitude being patient and all.


Anyway exciting times for sure, keep us updated :)

[Aeify]

Gillian, does she know there is a gg only forum here? It could be a great way for you two to "grow" this side of your relationship...just saying. Good luck!

[Satrana]

Good to hear your wife's resolve is beginning crack. You know of course that she will only want to give you an inch rather than a mile and if you were to push it, the doors would be closed shut again.

Did you tell her about how her words affected you? Have you discussed how this makes you a happier person? It is a good idea to give her feedback that her "giving in" will benefit her as you will be a happier more loving husband. Positive feedback will convince her that she made the right decision.

[kimdl93]

I'm glad to hear this. as noted above, it would be a great idea to let your wife know that you appreciate her comments...her tolerance if you will. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool for behavior modification!

[Jenny Doolittle]

Hi Gillian,

It is always nice to know that you partner is at least not going head to the divorce attorney.

My wife also has been cool over the years, but over time, especially after seeing the world did not end when others have discovered my female alter-ego. We are still in love with one another and live in the moment.

Even on a positive note, My wife had forgotten her lipstick over the weekend and asked me to use mine the other day. So with that in mind, stay positive.

[Nichola]

For those with suspecting / unco-operative partners.
As you know I got busted by my wife who has "known" for a very very long time but always denied and never wanted to talk. well last night at dinner a couple of little sarcastic remarks had been made to me, and I felt I had to bring the subject up again after our child was off to bed. So I did and this time my wife used different language to before, she spoke of coming to accept the situation. Nothing more she still loathes the idea and things it's "sick" but I know this is real progress for my personal situation!


Its great that she appears to be starting to accept the situation, my biggest fear is discovery by my partner.
If you don't mind me asking, how did she catch you?
It must have been a nightmare!
My partner sometimes makes remarks where I'll wonder, is she just messing with me or does she know more than I think she does?