Advice needed

[MichelleOBrien]

Okay, so I know in bigger cities you can get away with going out dressed because there's a larger number of people to blend in with, but...

I live in a fairly small town with a max population of 3000 people, most of which are homophobic to a large degree. Unfortunately, I don't have the option of moving out of town at the moment, and I don't have any constant transportation, but I'd still like to dress up and go out more often, even just to walk around at night. So I'm wondering if it's worth the risk to possible employment/personal relationships/etc. to do anything until I can move back to Southeast Louisiana where everything is pretty much okay and people won't really bother you.

[carolinoakland]

You have to be safe, take what precautions you must. And trust your instincts. Carol

[DonnaT]

Is it worth the risk? Only you can answer that.

I grew up in a very small town, and they tend to roll up the sidewalks at night. Meaning there's no one out, during school season, real late, so there was little risk in getting caught. Was it worth the risk? I reckon, since I never got caught. Don't know how I'd answer that question, had I been caught.

[kimdl93]

Only you can judge whether the risks to employment/personal relationships/etc are worth it for you. Either way, maybe you consider coming out to some of those closest to you. If there was someone - even one person - for you to be totally open with, your life could be appreciably better.

[Gerrijerry]

If you are really asking. I think you already know your town already. The obvious answer is dress in the house until you can move some place where you will be safer. Just my 2 cents. Small towns have there own rules and a very few people can cause a lot of problems for you. There are small towns where it would be no problem at all. You must know if your town is one of them.

[AKAMichelle]

I am out to most people and go whereever I want most of the time. But I have to say that small towns are a little different. Personally I would probably recommend not going out until after you move or go to a bigger city.

[Inna]

Michelle, as I read your post within your words, I feel your hesitation and that is provoked by fear. You know deep inside, the gut feeling is telling you what you want to know and I think is saying: "wait"

[gretchen_love]

I would say avoid going out in town. But, if you can come out to a close friend and dress with them, it can be a lot of fun!

[sandra-leigh]

Small town, inconsistent transportation. Okay: now, is it feasible for you to walk or bicycle to an area that would be deserted and yet safe, such as a clearing or a meadow or a field or a creek? I used to spend my summers in a pretty small town, and there were endless opportunities for kids to wander and disappear from sight.

If the above is feasible, then you could either take your clothes with you, or you could put your femme clothes under some non-descript clothes (I've driven a bicycle in a full-length skirt tucked down the legs of my jeans more than once.) Travel to your place, let down your hair, walk, lie back and watch the bird... just be yourself. Cover up again when you are done, travel back to town; if anyone asks, you were out for a day enjoying the day.


Yes, it is a lot of fun to go shopping, but as a city-bound person, I assure you that it is also a lot of fun to take a 10 mile hike in a skirt, as long as you have proper shoes.