I feel bad about lying to the pleasant and helpful woman at the wig shop

[LitaKelley]

I am THRILLED AND ECSTATIC over having a real nice quality wig I just got today.. I feel so gorgeous, and it feels so nice and like real hair..

I've been browsing around online, but could never make up my mind because I can't tell how it would look, feel or fit..

So, I searched online to find local shops, found one not too far, called to see if they had long blondes in stock and price ranges..

I get there, the shop is predominately dedicated for clientele whom suffer cancer, or female hair loss, however, the mature woman, also the owner of the shop, was extremely pleasant, very nice and oh so very helpful with her suggestions and showing me what she had that was not on the shelf.

I felt uncomfortable with telling the truth, so on the phone and in the shop, I lied and told her it was for a film shoot as I was the stunt double for the lead female and needed hair to match hers.

Ironically, I had no problem trying on several wigs in front of her, nor the two elderly customers whom got a good chuckle out of watching me admiring myself in the mirror as I run my fingers through the hair, lol

Anyway, I don't like lying to people.. but I'm also afraid of being open about who, or what I am, but considering this woman's overall pleasantness and professionalism, I wonder, if I had been up front and honest from the beginning, perhaps she would of been even more helpful, so far as making recommendations on hairstyles, etc to go with my face shape, skin tone, make more feminine, etc.. Hmm... But oh yes, I do so LOVE this hair and I am definitely going back to her shop next time I want a wig.. I saw a GORGEOUS long long curly red wig,, OMG such beautiful hair, and had it been on a beautiful woman, I would of loved her hair, so some day I hope to see if I look good in red hair.. I told my wife about that wig and she says she wants to see it because she got her hair cut very short the other day and don't like it, and she has red hair. and says we can share it.. her by day, me at night :)

[tifftg]

Lita,

I understand the nervousness and the fear. I suspect that she knew in spite of your lies, what your true intentions were and after watching your joy in trying on the wigs, she was sure. Go back and next time be open, she will be extremely helpful and I am sure you are not the first member of our community that she has helped.

Enjoy the support of this shop owner.

Hugs,
Tiffany

[Mikaela]

She probably knew, but I'll tell you, that was an awesome lie. Next time, take the wife if she supports you!

[Stephenie S]

Don't think for a minute that she didn't know. While it's common for CDers to feel like they are they only ones in the world, it ain't true. There are far more than you may imagine.

My point is that you are not the first CDer she has seen and you won't be the last. They are common in her shop.

Now does that matter? Absolutely not. Do you have to lie? No you don't. However, you are under no obligation to tell her ANYTHING other than that you want a high quality hair piece. You don't have to discuss anything about your private life with her other than your hair. She doesn't want to know. She doesn't care. Her job is to provide you and sell you what you want. That's all. Later, as you get to know her and she you, you may wish to share more of your private life. But for now? Just buy the hairpiece and enjoy it.

BTW, you made an excellent decision to go to a salon dedicated to cancer patients rather than a run of the mill wig shop. Your SA was very knowledgeable and professional for a reason. Cancer patients demand the very best and it sounds like you got it.

Stephie

[Chickhe]

She doesn't care what your story is. My last wig purchase the retailer said guys buy them all the time. They can be for rock band, CDing, personal taste, etc.etc.. I would tell her it is to look as feminine as possible though. The other thing, go when it is quiet and try all the wigs in the shop, you may be surprised what looks good.

[Fab Karen]

Salespeople have seen it all before, there's no need to make up stories. You have money, they have things they wanna sell you. No big deal to them. I'll bet the shop has at least half a dozen CD customers.

[Steph.TS]

I went into la senza, and when I bought a bunch panties, I hand told the sales lady that it was for my girlfriend, but I was certain she knew, and while I thought she knew I was still oddly comfortable with that knowledge because the other customers that see me there might not think I'm crossdressing...

look crossdressing is a scary thing, atleast at the start I'm still at that point, I would like to go into forever 21 do some more shopping, but I honestly don't know how I'd go in there men don't typically by pants shirts or dresses/skirts for their girlfriend...

[Kathi Lake]

Oh come on!! Man up, ladies. Grow a pair - and I don't mean boobs.

You don't like lying? Great! Wonderful! Don't do it.

Do you want people to think that we're honest, trustworthy individuals, or do you want them to continue thinking of us like they already do - lying, perverted, weird "things?" Trust me, they'll have much more respect for us if we tell them the truth proudly. Especially since they already know.

Sigh.

Kathi

[StaceyJane]

When I bought my last wig I went to a wig shop I had never been to before. I just said what I wanted and took off my old wig and started trying on new wigs.
No need for a story, I just needed a new wig.

[lisajane]

I purchase my wigs locally from a wig shop that has a salon in it, I call the owner and she gives me an hour of her time to find a wig that I like, she then takes me in the salon a makes any adjustments to the wig on the spot [ its a service thats included in the price of the wig ] I always go dressed and she has many TG clients.
If you try this you will find it to be a great experience and leave with a great wig and a new friend:hugs:

Lisa

[lingerieLiz]

The first wig I bought in 1965 I told the woman it was for a girl friend. As I was looking at them she persuaded me to try one on. As I was looking at myself in the mirror she told me that I would make a very pretty girl. I bought the one she recommended knowing she knew who it was for.

The last one I bought a few years ago I just went into the shop and told the woman I was looking for a wig and wanted it to be as natural looking for me as she had. She had no problems with it. We talked quite awhile about passing and she gave me several hints about hair and facial proportions.

On both occasions while I was in her shop women came in and looked around. I was very at ease about what I was there for and none of the women seemed to be bothered by it.

[Ashleythenewgirl]

Yesterday I went to a wig shop here in town, already posted about it so I won't repeat the details here. But it was such a positive experience as I called ahead and said I am a male and yes I am a new crossdresser. One thing I forgot to post earlier, the shop owner said "I love working with you girls. Come here anytime." and "You are going to have so much fun". In my short time as a crossdresser it was one of the best experiences. Actually one of the best in my whole life.
My point- be honest as you will find many doors open on this journey.

[morgan51]

I went to a merle norman/ wig salon in billings mt. was treated with the utmost respect no worries there for sure.

[eluuzion]

Aren't paranoia, anxiety and "guilt" fun...:heehee: Those situations are like a jet when the wheels leave the tarmac...you get higher by the minute...:D

We seem to forget sales folks are not on a witch hunt. They know their business and product and the people that it attracts.

The goal is always the same as yours is at your job...be nice/make money.

The funny thing about telling lies...is that the more you do it, the easier it gets. Kind of scary, eh?

:love:

[sterling12]

So, what are you going to do The Next Time you need a wig? If you go back there she will remember you! Remember your the one who told her some convoluted story about being a Stunt Double.

The good thing is that she probably didn't believe a word of it! Wig Stores typically do a significant part of their business with The TG Community. She's heard "Fibs" before.

When you go back, start with fessing up and treat it like a joke. "Hey, last time I gave you some BS Story about being in a Movie, I know you didn't believe it, but I just wanted to make start with a clean slate. The Wigs for me, I really liked The Last One, and I want to do some more business with you!"

Then, watch The Big Smile on her face! Repeat Customer means money. And, if she does her job right, you will send her more business.

END of Story.....everybody mucho happy!

[LitaKelley]

Well, for starters.. She was in her late 60s, and she had a customer in her mid 80s sitting in the chair, and it's a small hick town with little tolerance. Had it been in a large city, sure, I could of been more open about it, maybe, but, being new to this, I was not ready to shock an elderly woman by telling her "Ma'am, I need a wig so I can look like a woman"

And, well, I could of perhaps been more open, but, no way I want to be responsible for an 80yr old woman's heart attack.

Second, I'm not ready to be proud and open about it, I'm new to CD

It never occurred to me that she has probably had CD/TG/TS clients/customers, especially here.

Maybe the wig shop in NYC, LA, or P-town is accustomed to selling wigs to crossdressers, etc, but this shoppe was a nice little place in a small conservative hick town.

[michellesworld]

If she's an owner of the shop, then your purchase of the wig is all she really cares about. If she's an employee, the more wigs she sells, the more likely she keeps her job. In essence, you purchasing the wig is doing them a favor, and that outweighs your fib (this is too small for me to call a lie!:)).

[AKAMichelle]

She knew. She didn't just didn't let you know that she knew

[Chickhe]

I see no problem with a little lie if it makes you feel better and if you are not prepared to be out etc. The shop I went to, the lady serving me, actually was more reserved than I was... I told her I wanted female wig and I was not dressed. She understood that males buy wigs and was helpful, she preserved my privacy, she helped find a natural looking wig. When I said, one makes my face more feminine than the other she tended to avoid the conversation and say I could be a rock star... she was sort of making the lie for me (could be for the benefit of other customers who might have entered the store). ...She was friendly and helped me try all most every wig in the shop, even the most expensive one and I even negotiated a better price on the wig I bought. The best lie, is one you both know is not true...but provides a cover, so include the nod and wink and the phrase 'you know and I know what I really want' and 'between you and I, we'll just say this wig is for my wife or acting job'.

[NicoleScott]

So you walk in and say "Ma'am, you're not going to believe this, but I got another stunt double job, this time for a redhead". And she won't, because most likely she didn't believe you the first time. Level with her, and you'll get better service. It's not the first time a wig shop dealt with a shy crossdresser. They know what's going on, and how to handle it.

[Nicole Brown]

Hi Lita,

In my experience, lying to the owner of a wig salon isn't really necessary, they know all about us and are usually happy to assist us and accept our money. After years of buying my wigs either online or at costume shops, I decided to visit a professional wig stylist. I located a shop near my home and called and introduced myself to the owner Lucy as a transgenered woman.

Lucy's response was basically, OK what can I do for you? Those few words have led to a wonderful friendship with this lovely woman. Lucy spent nearly and hour with me and had me try on about 20 wigs until I found my color and style. I have since returned and purchased additional wigs from her and receive the same wonderful attention and treatment with each visit, and this all started by telling the truth.

[Cassidy]

There are times when it is easier to tell the truth because the response may be surprising.

This past May I made an appointment to have a makeover/transformation. It wasn't my first time and in the hands of an expert it can be most satisfying experience. Anyhow I don't own a digital camera so I brought along two 35mm disposable cameras to memorialize the event and then have the pictures developed to a disc. This method has been successful in the past so there's no real reason to change.

I dropped off the cameras at the local CVS the following morning while on my way to work with the intent to pick them up in the evening. That part was successful as it had been in the past. What hadn't been successful was the lack of picures on the disc.

The next day I returned to the CVS and mentioned to the twenty something female photo clerk that there were no pictures on it. She reviewed the disc acknowledged it was blank and then offered to re-scan the negatives. Keep in mind I am quite 'closeted' and by design do the drop off and pick up at different times to reasonably assure myself there would be different clerks in the store.

She said she would scan in the negatives while I waited and if she wasn't successful using the 'store' brand disc she would use Kodak at no additional charge. After wandering around the CVS for about 10 minutes I returned to the counter. She asked '...are these pictures of you...?' Faced with saying no or yes I chose '...yes...' She continued '...do you do this professionally...?' My response '...no, just for fun...' Response '...that's neat....' Answer '...yeah, it's fun...' She hands me the photo package, smiles and then says '...have a good evening...'

The sun came up the next day, the world didn't end, store security didn't haul me off. As I mentioned the truth may surprise you.

[Tina B.]

Lita, first, there are cross dressers even in small hick towns, there you are, right.
Second, a movie roll in a small hick town that no one heard of, not likely, I know, when a movie company comes near here every one in the county knows.
Third, if you call the shop, explain who you are, and that you are coming in for a wig, I bet she would not ask or say anything in front of another customer that would embarrass either of you, that would not be good business for her.
Some one in that business will be able to help find the most flattering hair style for your face shape, and body size, she will know things about that, that you haven't even thought of. Give her a try, shopping really is fun even in drab, once you get over you fear.
Tina B.

[Lorileah]

at least you gave her a new excuse to write in the book she keeps. Let's see, "I am buying for my mother who is too ill to come in", "I need it for a costume party", "I am playing a trick on my wife.", "I have to replace a wig I ruined" and now "I am a stunt double for a film (that evidently does not have a costume budget)"

You will get better service and styling if you own up to it. They are in business to sell wigs, they don't care who you are (they work with cancer victims for crying out loud who they are required to keep secret). She may actually respect you more if you just fess up. The cost of the wig could very well increase when they suspect you are being secretive...what you gonna do? complain? after all you don't want anyone to KNOW its for you right?

Life gets easier when you tell. You don't have to remember which lie you used last time. Many wig shops keep a card file of what you like and how you like it styled. But since this was for a "job" they won't know next time you come in what you liked before.

So when is this movie coming out? Any big names we might know? Where you shooting? What is your stunt? sounds dangerous. Have we seen you in something else? Did you ever double for Bruce Willis?

[Samantha B L]

I used to tell the sales ladies garbage mouthed whoppers when I was first buying Fem stuff. I even used an alias on some paperwork for these handsewed custom items. I had sort of a temporary girlfreind in 1978 and 1979(not the same as the person from 1969 who later became my SO). We went shopping for fem stuff once in awhile and I would panic in department stores and shopping centers when I would buy stuff like panties and hosiery and agressively demand that she be the one to talk to the salesladies and that she also tell them the purchase is for her! our relationship broke off because she moved to another town but she did eventually tell me that my cover story lies were totally unescesary and I didn't need special assistance shopping for things. She said the help in those places are used to all kinds and they didn't give a s___ if I was a "Transvestite". Lita,I don't know of many wig stores that won't service TG/TS/CD people. Furthermore,they make no bones about you wanting to buy a wig and they aknowledge it openly. I don't mean to tell you your business,and by the way,the wig was an excellent buy. I think you got a pretty good deal and you look very fine,but hun,you're in for a real blast when you aproach shopping from an open kind of standpoint and you avoid those garbage mouth whoppers.