Probably crossed the line

[ColletteCD]

Today I was shopping at a warehouse store picking up some things. I was walking by and noticed a beautiful set of legs in heels (what I always look at first :) ). Moving up the legs I saw a cute Sundress, and then noticed that I was looking at a fellow cd/tg. After being in the same line (hoping I could make small talk), but was too many people behind, I was looking at the reactions of people around her. I was frustrated that I couldn't talk to her, and frustrated at the non-acceptance of people.
I ended up getting out of the store a bit after her, and saw her putting their stuff into the car. I suckered up the courage to pull along side, and complement her on her ability to be out in public in such a cute dress and heels. She was very taken aback when I started talking about it, but mentioned that I liked to dress too. She quickly was moving to get into her car, and I drove away, almost regretting talking to her.
If she happens to be on here, I am sorry, if I offended you, I was just excited to meet someone like me.

[sterling12]

We have certainly warned others about this, on Other Threads. But, you give us an opportunity to verify what will usually happen. CD gets "Read" by you, is frightened....freaks out! And that's The Way The Story seems to end about 90% of The Time. The only time it seems to work out is when you are both Dressed, in a Club or at A Meeting, or some other TG-Friendly Environment.

Ladies, put The Shoe on The Other Foot. Try to imagine how you would react to some stranger coming up and striking up a conversation about how "Readable" you are, but how good your effort has been! Now you get The Picture! Everyone, Please Refrain!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Gillian]

The temptation is or must be enormous to go over and introduce yourself for sure, but as Sterling12 say's if I were the one dressed I would freak out myself, so I think the experience was very valuable to you for the future and if hopefully the person is a member here it will all end in smiles.

[Freddy12]

I agree that it usually doesn't end happily. I wish it were some other way, but I understand. Support groups are about the only way to meet other cders.

[CallMeMeg]

This happened to me in one of those discount shoe/clothing stores that you sometimes see. A guy acknowledged me; I knew I was read. I didn't know what to say although I knew he was "one of us". I said nothing and turned away. I told the gg friend I was with and she struck up a conversation with him, and invited him to join us as we drove to Baltimore for my first meeting with other t-gurls. He accepted but never showed up.

I'm always tempted when I see another cd, but I think it's better that I never said anything.

[linda allen]

What if it turns out to be a GG? How embarassing would that be?

[JenniferR771]

Your only choice upon spotting a sister in a store is to grab a skirt and walk up and say ,"Do you think this goes with my color?"

[Inna]

Most complicated and yet one of the most basic instinctual dilemmas. We dress, we embrace the woman within, and seek approval without. Well, if the world was transearth everything would be normal, but realities are such that for most part we swim in the pool of imaginary reality and yet we seek others to see us as we do. I am realist and can totally relate to opinions and reactions of regular folks who are taken by surprise seeing male body in female attire. Ladies we do bring it on and I know the need often surpasses the reason. Wanting to connect with other CDs out there is only natural, pack instinct kicks in and we want to acknowledge their courage as we would like them to acknowledge ours, at the same time we create a paradox of revealing to them being read, and beautiful thing turns to negative feedback. I am stuck between world of real and dream of femininity and that is all the anguish and frustration, in fact most of the dysphoria comes from not being real or passable, it is the disconnect we feel enforced by being read. Often I feel that the feeling of knowing of this makes us work harder at bringing woman in us to life and so makes it for a positive experience after all. As they say: no pain no gain, how true!

[suzy1]

This happened to me only yesterday!
I was walking along and a C.D. Girl was walking the other way. To be honest she looked awful. Everything was wrong, dress, heir, even here breasts where up around her shoulders.
The desire to go up to her and help with a bit of advice was almost overwhelming!
But, thanks to this site I walked on.

Bless this site, SUZY

[JulieC]

What if it turns out to be a GG? How embarassing would that be?

Exactly. It also could be a post-op TS. Being read so easily could be shattering.

I've never knowingly encountered a crossdressed MtF person in public before. But, I agree with what's been said; the tempation is VERY high, but how to approach and put the person at ease is sooo difficult.

[carhill2mn]

A CD friend of mine asked me just recently as to how to handle such a situation. My advice, based upon what I have read/heard, was to not make contact as the person may be unhappy about being "read" (I hate that term) and worse, may not even be a "T" girl.

[AKAMichelle]

This is a hard thing to deal with. A lot of cd'ers even the one who go out are terrified of being spotted even more so confronted. Even so I believe that saying something when able and appropriate is great. Often times the opportunities don't present themselves.

[sissystephanie]

As an individual old in age, and in CD'ing activity, my response is different. When my wife was alive and I did go out as Stephanie, I really did not mind being "outed" so to speak. If someone recognised me as a CD, I would let them know that yes, I was one! I know I am a CD, so why not acknowledge it! Now, of course I go out dressed totally enfemme but with no wig and no makeup! So there is no question that I am a man, but dressed totally enfemme!! I have a lot of fun walking around like that!