Begininig of the end?

[5150 Girl]

Usually, my Polar bear loves it when I dressed up. She shows me off to anyone who comes along. Family freinds, people we just met, whoever. Infact, just a couple days ago, she had me dressing up in verious outfits, and comming out into the driveway wher she was sitting with her sister, kind of a fashion show for sis... I'm like "eye candy" to her brother. (he's very sick, EC is all that matters to him)
Her brother has pizza fridays at his place weekly. I went in full dress a couple times to the smaller gatherings.
But here's where it starts to get funny.... Last week, she was all "well, me and brother were wondering how Dad would react, if he showed up." Ok, he's not seen me fully dress, but he knows about it, in fact he even calls me Paris Hilton when the topic comes up. Just a couple days ago, he said somthing like, if that's the worst thing I do, then it's no big deal.
This weeks excuse, "the kids don't understand they ask a lot of questons." Ok, the first time yea, they had a couple questions, but all in all, the tween gets a big laugh out of it. (he'll be a prop comic one day) and the other one is to little to understand anything is out of place, we just said i was playing dress up like at Holoween. They hardly even noticed I was dressed up the second time back.

Confusing story? Yea, it is for me to. And I know the time line is propbly hard to folow the way i have it layed out to.
I wonder if she's getting tired of the CD bit, or if there's somthing else going haywire in her grey matter? Early metopause causing mood swings? She's had a few on other non related issues lately. I don't know what to think.

[PretzelGirl]

First you have to look at how you two are talking. If the communication seems fine then....


I don't know what to think.

Maybe you are thinking too much. Sometimes you have to give your SO a little downtime. It can't be "go go go" all the time. Maybe a quiet evening with Dad without the Paris Hilton jokes feels good to her once in a while. Maybe she wants family time with all the kids and the male you. You haven't transitioned (that I have seen you mention anyway), so even being accepting, she probably still wants time with the both sides of you.

So take a deep breath and let things go. If you keep thinking about every bit of this, you will have trouble getting through life relaxed. Stress isn't all its cracked up to be. But if it really bugs you, ask her.

[5150 Girl]

I've not transitioned yet, but I'd like to if I can ever afford it. And I'm reasonably sure that would be cool with everone. In fact i'm in drab most of the time right now.
This is just one example of things she used to like, getting pushed to th side.
The part that bugs me is, I'm thinking there is a bigger problem in the works. She's had 3 major meltdowns (unrelated) the last cople days, and I'm wondering if the cheez has slipped off her cracker?

[Tina B.]

sounds like it maybe something else entirely, sometimes when someone keeps blowing up, for things that just don't seem that big, it's something else that they don't want to talk about. sounds like it's time for a understanding talk about what sucks in life, maybe she will give you a clue.
Tina B.

[Cherry Lynn]

If I were your wife and you called me Polar Bear I would probably have issues with you too.

[DianeDeBris]

Hi -- you say your spouse has had three "meltdowns" in the last few days. The fact is that something important is going on with her; it may be a health issue (either medical or mental) or it may be some other type of problem she's dealing with. It may, or it may not, be you, or CDing, or who knows what. BUT: the most important person in your life is having a hard time. Your job, IMHO, is to love her and help her, whatever that may require. It certainly is appropriate for you to talk with her, openly and with love and care and concern, and to start by making it clear to her that you recognize that something is troubling her, and that you want to be good to her and help her and support her, *no matter what it may be.* I can't predict whether her issues at the moment involve you and/or CDing, or who knows what; but I'm confident that she is in pain and she needs her best friend to help her. Good luck to you both!

[Chickhe]

Well, playing dressup is a little different than doing it full time... she might be stressed from other things in her life and on top of that may just want to feel secure...you know, the little picket fence, slippers beside the sofa, guy on the sofa... give her some attention...take her out on a date? You didn't forget her birthday or your anniversary or anyhting ?

[Christina Horton]

Well her blow out may not be about you but I fear it soon will with maybe no fault of your own. Be prepared for a CD blow out cuz there is something wrong that she can't express right now. Just be ready and be there for her!

[raleighbelle]

I totally agree with Diane.

Your wife's issues may or may not have anything to do with your cross-dressing, but you should be there to support her. One problem with many of us who CD is that we get incredibly self-absorbed by it all and everything is centered around us. Make sure you give your wife equal attention.

Good Luck!