Amateur shutterbugs everywhere!

[Melissa A.]

Has anyone experienced stuff like this? I suppose this would happen much more often to folks in urban areas, I know I now come in close proximity with many, many more people a day than I did when I lived the automobile lifestyle....I'm just sitting, after work, waiting for my train late one night this week, when this punk(trust me, he filled the role well) sitting a few feet from me turns to me and says, "Hey, can I take your picture?" Well, at least he asked. "No, you cannot", I said, as the train was pulling into the station. "Oh, c'mon, bro, don't be like that!" Oh, geez....Now I'm starting to forget that I'm a lady....this time, juuuust a teeny bit angrier, "I'm not your, or anyone's bro. Be like what??"
"C'mon. Let's hang out".
"Let's not", I said, as we both entered the car.

So this tool proceeds to sit across from me, cell phone between his itchy fingers. It's not the first time I've had to deal with this, and it's a sucky situation. First of all, if they take my picture, and they know that I know they did, I now have to make a decision...I have no problem standing up for myself when taunted and the like, but walking over to someone and saying, "delete that picture or I'm gonna cram that phone so far up you you won't know what happened", really isn't my style, or, in most cases, something I have the ability back up after I say it. I'm really not a scary or intimidating person. So I can just let it go, I suppose. And I guess there's the perfectly reasonable view that some random a-hole taking a pic of the trannie he saw on the subway for all his friends to see isn't that big a deal, or something I'll ever have to deal with after it happens. But still, it bothers me. So much for Serenity Now.

So when I see someone fingering their cell and looking at me wierd, I typically stare at them, intently, and their phone, for a few moments. That has always worked as of this typing. That night, I lifted the book I was reading directly over my face, peering over the top of it a couple of times at this idiot, and giving him the bitchiest smile I could muster. He resisted the urge to capture me digitally. This city is alot of things, but rarely ever boring.

Hugs,

Melissa:)

[TxKimberly]

Have to admit that this has never happened to me. Of course, in all honesty, I probably would have agreed to allow it on the condition that I got to take his picture too. :D

[Hali]

Most pple find transgender pple really "interesting"...lol!

[Priscillia Smith]

Sometimes, don't you wish you were wearing some tall stilettoes so you can stab someone in their eye. Ok, that's a little harsh, but you get the point. Some people are just retarded sometimes. Also, gotta love NY. I bet you have the NY attitude, I certainly do! LOL

[7sisters]

It happens. I wear my giant sunglasses and I hold a kerchief discreetly over my nose. It does not look weird... just looks like I have a cold. I fake a sneeze sometimes. Really. Luckily in my city in India, we have seperate compartments in trains for ladies and men, besides the general compartment for families. But in buses, if you are sitting down and have a low neckline, and they are standing just next to you, you have to be careful they dont capture jiggly cleavage footage... and your face next. Always a chance they will put it on youtube. I normally complain to the bus conductor or scream "what the hell are you doing" "pevert" "dont you have respect". The offensive men quickly disembark.

[Ze]

I indeed had somebody take my picture with their phone while I was on the transit. He has his phone between his knees aimed at me (I was the only person on that side) and I heard the classic "shutter" sound. Case closed.

Only he never even bothered to ask me. I didn't do anything about it because, well, he was twice my size and had the "thug" appearance of wanting to start a fight with anybody smaller than him. So now I'm probably up on some site somewhere for comedic effect; I try not to think about it. The whole internet/picture phone thing really does easily strip people of their autonomy just because somebody's an ass.

[TxKimberly]

. . . I didn't do anything about it because, well, he was twice my size and had the "thug" appearance . . .

Aint that whole "twice my size" thing a bitch? LOL

[Teri Jean]

I had this happen this morning as I was loading a project in the car. I was parked in the loading ramp area and the semi driver decided that he could wait for me and must have shot a few pics as I worked and put the cart into the building. What a putz.

[Melody Moore]

I know it can be frustrating, annoying & very upsetting for some people to have their photo taken,
but personally I would just rather smile nicely for their happy snap, and let them be on their way.

I have had this happen several times actually in the past few weeks after I have left the Buddha Bar where I have been the MC/Host of the Bust Your Cherry drag show. Ive been stopped and asked nicely if they can get photo of me or with me. Most of the time they want the photo with me so I'm obviously all the attention is because I'm becoming a bit of a local personality and appear a bit larger than life for a lot of people but honestly I feel very humble & flattered by the attention but Im learning now to take it in my stride & deal with it.

From a legal point of view you are public property when it comes to having your photo taken while in a public place - so there really is nothing you can do to stop it. If you respond violently then there is a very good chance you could be arrested. This is the very loophole in the law the paparazzi always exploits when they are stalking the rich & famous. However if they are trying to peer down your cleavage or take a photo up your skirt or or what is between your legs this is a totally different story and an outright invasion of your personal privacy.

My advice is simple... learn to deal with it and Hali is right... Most people find the transgendered really "interesting"...lol!

[Megan Thomas]

From a legal point of view you are public property when it comes to having your photo taken while in a public place - so there really is nothing you can do to stop it. If you respond violently then there is a very good chance you could be arrested.

That is indeed the law in the UK - There is no right to privacy in a public place - a comment attributable to our last Home Secretary i recall.

There is a genre of photography called street photography, and the idea is often to get candid shots of public places and the people in them. I personally don't go in for it but nor do i feel the need to get prior permissions from anyone who is in my shot. Such is life...

Edit; It's also worth noting here in the UK no-one can order you to delete images from your camera without a court order, not even a police officer.

[Faith_G]

Only once that I've noticed, it was a teenage girl at an antique tractor pull. She was sitting down the row from me and she started eyeballing me and then nudged her boyfriend who tried to take a subtle look and failed. They whispered back and forth for a while and then out came her phone. I gave her a dirty look and they went away.

[Hope]

I haven't had that happen to me yet. Yet. I assume my day is coming. And I assume the reason I have not yet experienced it has to do with the fact that for the vast majority of the time I am still cross-dressing (that would be as a guy) and I am not out and visible nearly as often as many of the rest of you are.

I think when this does happen though - we should be gracious about it. We all know why these tools are taking the pictures... so they can go home and tell their buddies "Hey - you would never believe this tranny I saw on the subway! ..." The question is - how do we want the rest of that conversation to go? "Yeah he was total dick, I had to take this photo when he wasn't looking..." OR "Yeah, she was really cool, we had a really interesting conversation about what her life was like..." Ok, so the second one might be a bit optimistic, but the first one is definitely not how I want to be known... We are all ambassadors - willing or not.


That is indeed the law in the UK - There is no right to privacy in a public place

Edit; It's also worth noting here in the UK no-one can order you to delete images from your camera without a court order, not even a police officer.

The same is true in the US, though ironically some Police officers here have been attempting to circumvent that law when they get caught on tape doing - well the regrettable things police have become known for doing. But thankfully where those cases go to court, they are loosing (so far).

[Melody Moore]

" The question is - how do we want the rest of that conversation to go? "Yeah he was total dick, I had to take this photo when he wasn't looking..." OR "Yeah, she was really cool, we had a really interesting conversation about what her life was like..." Ok, so the second one might be a bit optimistic, but the first one is definitely not how I want to be known... We are all ambassadors - willing or not.
Im quite the willing ambassador and am only too willing to talk to anyone who might have fair & respectable questions - I ran into a lady who knew me as a male today while I was over visiting my ex-girlfriend who has the pre-conceived notion that the physical sex of a person is binary to the gender identity, gender role & sexual orientation. This stupid woman has some weird ideas in her head because I'm transitioning now I should be attracted to men when I'm not - I tried to explain that gender & sexual orientation isn't binary but she refused to accept that - I then told her that she was extremely ignorant of the real facts, then simply got up and walked out. Sometimes people don't have any common sense & cant accept simple facts no matter how simply its explained to them & refuse to accept the truth - so always be prepared to deal with that.

[Hope]

Yeah, sadly there are always going to be closed minded bigots around. We can't change that, and we can't change what they think of us... they are driven by emotion and ideology, and not reality. You are spot on right about that. But you never know about the guy who is taking a picture... Is he some uber conservative whack-job who is going to tell you that you are going to hell if you don't "believe on Jeeeezzzus!," or is he simply one of the hoards of folks who has very little real life experience with the trans community outside of Ru Paul or a comedians jokes? Chances are that he is one of the latter. Even if he is one of the former, there are lots of folks who belong to the latter group around watching what goes down, and if we behave gracefully towards even the jerks - they will see that and hopefully be influenced by it.

I'm not suggesting that it is fair, or fun, or even required that we treat others with dignity, even when they fail to treat us with dignity... I'm just saying that if we CAN, in the heat of battle, then it will be a little better for all of us down the road.

I am not suggesting that you or the OP did the wrong thing - or that anyone else did the wrong thing... I'm just encouraging graceful behavior - perhaps particularly where it is least deserved.

[Olivia2]

I had my own amateur phot experience. I was planning to meet a couple of the women here at a TG night in a club. I was in male mode and there was so much picture snapping going on with phones and razor cameras I decided not to stay as I'm not out yet and did not want to risk being identified or out in cyberspace. I guess we all have to learn to deal with this phenomenon. Truth is, our pictures can be taken without our knowing as well so we all just have to be aware and be careful and try to control the environment as much as we are able and to our comfort level.

[Melody Moore]

I am not suggesting that you or the OP did the wrong thing - or that anyone else did the wrong thing... I'm just encouraging graceful behavior - perhaps particularly where it is least deserved.Oh don't worry Hope I was as graceful as I could be while standing up for what is right & my true convictions. None of us have to tolerate ignorance particularly while it is being displayed in the face of someone else that I really care about. Another reason I walked out was because I was also sending a very loud & clear message to my ex-girlfriend about bigots who try to stand in the way of the two of us. What else can one do? Stay there and argue?

[Gisele]

I had it happen one time when I was getting my nails done. Jennifer had to work so I went alone. In came in 3 teen girls. I was in male mode except I was wearing tight fitting hipphugger jeans with a long t-shirt. I know they were looking at me because I caught them looking over at me.
When I had to get up to go wash off my hands I seen one of the girls act like she was texting. When I was standing at the sink I could see her in the mirror with her phone pointed at me. She must have got a good shot of my well defined butt (thanks to padded panties).
I was a bit upset at what was going on but, I just went on with what I was doing. I left it alone and when I was leaving the shop I could hear them break out laughing. I know the girls that work there were not laughing because I am a regular and they all like me.
I have been back and will keep going when I can afford it.

If someone wants a photo of me go ahead and have at it. I look nothing like my male self to worry about beeing seen on the net.