Strong urge to out myself! Please advise!

[KateW]

Over the last few weeks I have been overcome by a growing need to out myself. Because I dress full time at home around my supportive wife, it has very much become the norm for me. But then the alarm goes off at 7am and I have to put on my guy clothes to go to work, and I have really started to begrudge it. The thing is, I'm not in a place right now where I'm ready to go full time, or considering a surgical transition. We have our first child on the way in less than 2 months and we hope to have more. So, it wouldn't really make sense to out myself and go through all of that hassle if it doesn't coincide with going full time. So why on earth do I keep wanting to?

IF I ever decided to transition, it'd make the most logical sense to first start hormones, then tell friends and family before getting facial feminisation surgery, and finally SRS. But any such idea is years off (after kids). Please talk some sense into me!

Kate xxx

[regina young]

KateW, I know exactly what you are saying. Part of me says I don't care who knows, or what the repercussions would be. The other part says, what in the world are you thinking. Even to the point of hoping someone will bust you so it would be out. I don't know what causes it but it is a very strong urge, or drive. I am sure many here have, or do, or will feel the same thing. Maybe it is the other person wanting out, I don't know. Maybe it is the real me trying to take over. Or maybe it is the excitement. I do feel as though a counselor might have better answers, or perhaps someone here....regina

[giuseppina]

Hello Kate,

I agree with Regina that a gender counsellor is a good idea. Outing yourself to the world is not a decision to take lightly, IMHO. Your wife's feelings on the issue must be considered.

[tricia_uktv]

If you have to go out then book a hotel at a nearby town and go to a transgender friendly place. That way you can experiment and keep your two lives seperate.