Mid term crisis?

[Inna]

I don't know is it some sort of mid transition crisis but I have entered "everything not quite as it should be" stage. I look in the mirror and see changes to my face and yes it sort of gravitates to feminine but not the feminine I was thinking of. Mainly was under impression I would turn into this blossoming beautiful rose flower but no rose in site. In fact I don't think I like it. Its weird and I feel hesitation of weather proceeding further is right. My internal drive says push forth but I see changes are not satisfying my own criteria. Is it normal? Am I just one of many going through this stage?

[AllieSF]

I can't speak from personal TS experience, but I would think that the main goal for most TS's is to transition first with hormones and then maybe with SRS. I do believe that most hope for more physical changes then may be possible based on age of transitioning and personal physical make up and how each person responds to the hormones. We all have those dreams. For me as a CD, I hope that new wig and waist cincher will do the trick to make me totally beautiful and that dreaded word, "passable". Of course, I would be disappointed with the true results, but I dream anyway. So, possibly you are getting your hopes too high and putting too much emphasis on the physical changes. Maybe a little self reflection as to why you started hormones in the first place would get you back to what you are and where you want to go with it. I have found out that I should hope for the best, but at the same time be realistic and expect something much less than that. If not, I would always be disappointed, which over time would just keep piling the negatives on me. That to me is not a good position to be in. I would much rather say, "Wow, that new wig really does help me look better than I thought that it would." Good luck and cheer up, I still love how you look.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

my personal experience was to have many ups and downs regarding my feminization...it takes a LONG time...
because i spent my whole life fantasizing and putting myself in "Her" place...i had all kinds of set notions about how i wanted to look...

i have only recently been actually seeing myself as female when i look in the mirror (i am being honest...that quick glance tells alot!)..

the thing is..its a totally differnet female than what i had in my mind's eye...its just me..

now i have my ups and downs and bad hair days..but more and more i just don't see the male in me..

i expect this can happen for you..

but bottom line is that you need to be prepared that your appearance may feel unrecognizable to you and will not likely be the woman you had in your minds eye...as long as its a woman tho, i'm not complaining...

[Inna]

When I approached my transition it was because I ran out of ways to disillusion my self with who I wasn't. When it begun, it seemed to answer all those questions I had and put me on the right track of getting to know my self. I have gone a way and feel much closer to the truth I feel is me, but along the way I created this monster of an idealized image. I suppose all the genetic girls do this being exposed to media and publications promoting utmost beautiful airbrushed and photoshoped creatures that do not exist. I too have fallen a victim and when faced with reality, not to mention starting from aged masculine, testosterone infected body, getting to anywhere near beautiful is rather immature hope. I know it will take time to come to terms with this notion of real me, but the emotions already at work do tear me apart again and again. Thanks for your wise words and letting me know I am not the only one who dwell on vanity and had unrealistic concept of what will be.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

along the way I created this monster of an idealized image.

well put

now get your sexy butt out there and slay that monster!

[Faith_G]

Some days I finish my makeup, step back from the mirror, and I think "Who the hell is she?" so I understand the disconnect you are feeling. I certainly am not the woman I dreamed I would be "someday." But I am so happy to look in the mirror and see a woman looking back at me that it really doesn't matter that she's not perfect. She'll do.

[7sisters]

Alexia I keept telling you you look hot. The camera can't lie that much.

[Joyously 27]

I don't know is it some sort of mid transition crisis but I have entered "everything not quite as it should be" stage. I look in the mirror and see changes to my face and yes it sort of gravitates to feminine but not the feminine I was thinking of. Mainly was under impression I would turn into this blossoming beautiful rose flower but no rose in site. In fact I don't think I like it. Its weird and I feel hesitation of weather proceeding further is right. My internal drive says push forth but I see changes are not satisfying my own criteria. Is it normal? Am I just one of many going through this stage?

Alexia I think most everyone has a crisis of sorts, For me it's I didn't think I was Fem
looking enough, however with aging I make a pleasant grandmother type.I didn't do any hormones and I'm still closeted and wish the hell I made the change years ago. I wish you well, that change can be reached if you truly want it.

[Aprilrain]

Alexia, do you airbrush your avatar photo? No? Then stop whining your beautiful girl!
I have to agree that as long as I see a female looking back in the mirror I'm pretty happy. That doesn't mean I don't sit there and say "god your pores are too big, your jaws too masculine, your makeup looks atrocious, your nose is crooked, give up now its pointless!!!!" Thats the thing though it's NOT pointless. If I get to see a woman looking back at me in the mirror just before I head out the door to face the world then its worth it.

[Melody Moore]

Then stop whining your beautiful girl!
Hello?

You do realise this thread is more than 8 months old?

I think Alexia has well & truly got a grasp on things by now.
And I am wondering why Joyously even dug it up & revived it?

[Aprilrain]

No didn't bother to look at the date. Lol! Details!

[Coyote]

Hello?

You do realise this thread is more than 8 months old?

I think Alexia has well & truly got a grasp on things by now.
And I am wondering why Joyously even dug it up & revived it?

Am I missing something? Looks like the OP date was October 2010 - 3 months is a long time in internet time, but its not "dog years" 8-P

Perhaps the date structure threw it off on what number is "month - day - year" as is in the US, and day - month - year in say, the UK.

[Melody Moore]

Am I missing something? Looks like the OP date was October 2010 - 3 months is a long time in internet time, but its not "dog years" 8-P

Perhaps the date structure threw it off on what number is "month - day - year" as is in the US, and day - month - year in say, the UK.


10-05-2010Of course, I forgot that the US has date formats twisted around. I looked & assumed it was 10th of May 2010 since my my time zone is set to AEST +10.00. But still its an old thread all the same & I do believe Alexia is doing a lot better nowadays. ;)

[JohnH]

Of course, I forgot that the US has date formats twisted around. I looked & assumed it was 10th of May 2010 since my my time zone is set to AEST +10.00. But still its an old thread all the same & I do believe Alexia is doing a lot better nowadays. ;)

What is the most logical date format would be yyyy-mm-dd the same as we express time as hh:mm:ss. That is the ISO date format, and I would write today's date as 2011-1/17. The American way of expressing dates is half way right in my opinion. Now we need to make the year first.

Johanna

[Stephanie Anne]

Of course, I forgot that the US has date formats twisted around. I looked & assumed it was 10th of May 2010 since my my time zone is set to AEST +10.00.

Best date format humo[u]r ever! You made my day Melody and get a gold star

http://i.imgur.com/M5Son.jpg

Oh and we have it correct, you all are upside down. I blame your toilets flushing backwards.

[Melody Moore]

Oh and we have it correct, you all are upside down. I blame your toilets flushing backwards.

Really? Which way is really up & which way is down? and how do you
know for sure that its not your toilets that are flushing backwards?

Isn't it all relative to the observer? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_relativity)

Maybe you are on the bottom-side of the earth because there always seems to far more 'sh*t' going on in
the northern hemisphere especially when you consider where all the war & conflict seem to be happening.
How many wars & natural disasters has there been North of the Equator & how many south of the Equator?

Now we have a crisis we can talk about, so I am very happy in the fact I live in a place you guys call 'downunder'. ;)

Yeah, I know, I can be a real cheeky b*tch sometimes :p and proud of it LOL :heehee:

[Traci Elizabeth]

Really? Which way is really up & which way is down? and how do you
know for sure that its not your toilets that are flushing backwards?

Isn't it all relative to the observer? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_relativity)

Maybe you are on the bottom-side of the earth because there always seems to far more 'sh*t' going on in
the northern hemisphere especially when you consider where all the war & conflict seem to be happening.
How many wars & natural disasters has there been North of the Equator & how many south of the Equator?

Now we have a crisis we can talk about, so I am very happy in the fact I live in a place you guys call 'downunder'. ;)

Yeah, I know, I can be a real cheeky b*tch sometimes :p and proud of it LOL :heehee:


Is this coming from the same gal who's country is half under water, and is being taken over by rabbits, snakes, and all sorts of "nasty" creatures?

[Traci Elizabeth]

Some days I finish my makeup, step back from the mirror, and I think "Who the hell is she?" so I understand the disconnect you are feeling. I certainly am not the woman I dreamed I would be "someday." But I am so happy to look in the mirror and see a woman looking back at me that it really doesn't matter that she's not perfect. She'll do.

Faith, I share your same sentiments especially when I am having a frizz hair day where it looks like I stuck my finger in the electrical outlet. Yet there are other days when all the stars align perfectly and after my make-up and hair are done, I stand back looking in the mirror smiling from ear-to-ear.

I think everyone wants to be attractive and we often try too hard when in fact we are all beautiful in our own right.

I know all the pictures I have seen of you and the OP, you are both very pretty women.

[Felicity71]

Is this coming from the same gal who's country is half under water, and is being taken over by rabbits, snakes, and all sorts of "nasty" creatures? Thats down here in Brisbane, shes up in Cairns, 1000 miles away. My workplace nearly went under water. Its been a huge week here, with so much of the city affected by a one in 50 year flood.

[Melody Moore]

Is this coming from the same gal who's country is half under water, and is being taken over by rabbits, snakes, and all sorts of "nasty" creatures?
Our country is half underwater? That is one huge exaggeration for a start LOL

As for the snakes & other nasty creatures, theyre not as bad as you think, theyre just part of life here, along with the crocodiles, cyclones & flooding we get in the tropical North. We deal with these types of issues every year here in the tropics and we know how to survive very well in this environment. I am at no risk of being flooded out because I live on high ground & not on a natural water-course or flood plain. This is something I have always done ever since I moved up here in 1979.

Every year around this time there is a monsoonal trough that comes down from Asia & usually extends right across the top end of Australia. However this year that monsoonal trough has gone much further south which is why the southern part of the country is now experiencing tropical type weather that is even affecting Victoria & Tasmania in the most southern part of Australia.

Also I was originally born in Brisbane & grew up in Toowoomba where the flooding originated from & know the Lockyer Valley area extremely well. I also seen the 1974 floods first hand at the age of 12. The flood disaster that started in Toowoomba this year was a freak tropical super-storm that dumped 150mm of rain in 30mins & has never happened before in the city's history that I am aware of. All the water from the Toowoomba area which is at an elevation of 691 metres (2,267 ft) was collected in a tiny storm drain that runs along Mort St/Kitchener Street (http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Kitchener+Street,+Rangeville,+Queensland,+Austra lia&sll=-27.463804,152.052841&sspn=0.148051,0.308647&g=Murphys+creek&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Kitchener+St,+Rangeville+Queensland+4350,+Au stralia&ll=-27.539327,152.055931&spn=0.147949,0.308647&t=h&z=12) & was funnelled down the Lockyer Valley via Murphy's Creek (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Helidon) then hit Helidon (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Helidon) & Grantham (http://maps.google.com/maps?q=Helidon) on it's way to Ipswich (http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&q=ipswich+queensland&client=firefox-a&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Ipswich+Queensland,+Australia&ll=-27.518624,152.921448&spn=0.295954,0.617294&t=h&z=11) & Brisbane (http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=brisbane+queensland&sll=-27.518624,152.921448&sspn=0.295954,0.617294&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=Brisbane+Queensland,+Australia&ll=-27.455274,153.054829&spn=0.074031,0.154324&t=h&z=13). I was reading some comments from Americans on another website where they believed that Toowoomba was on a flood plain & people shouldn't be living there. The recent disaster in central & south-east of Queensland is a rare occurrence that many people believe is attributed to global warming & the El nino effect (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/El_Ni%C3%B1o-Southern_Oscillation).

In the Northern part of the state where I am living, we are experiencing surprisingly dry weather as a result of the monsoonal trough moving south of my location. There was a tropical cyclone that dissipated a few days ago that moved that far south that it was actually east of Tweed Heads in New South Wales which is a very unusual path for a tropical cyclone.

My heart, prayers & thoughts go out to the victims of the floods in the southern part of Queensland & my hometown of Toowoomba. :gh:

[JohnH]

Faith, I share your same sentiments especially when I am having a frizz hair day where it looks like I stuck my finger in the electrical outlet. Yet there are other days when all the stars align perfectly and after my make-up and hair are done, I stand back looking in the mirror smiling from ear-to-ear.


When my wife wakes up in the morning her short hair really looks rumpled. My long hair just combs into place quite easily in the morning. Now on the other hand, when it is windy and I am going to church I have to stop in the "powder room" [as known as the men's room] to comb my hair. My wife does not have to worry about the wind.

Johanna

[Stephanie Anne]

Really? Which way is really up & which way is down? and how do you
know for sure that its not your toilets that are flushing backwards?

Isn't it all relative to the observer? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_relativity)

Maybe you are on the bottom-side of the earth because there always seems to far more 'sh*t' going on in
the northern hemisphere especially when you consider where all the war & conflict seem to be happening.
How many wars & natural disasters has there been North of the Equator & how many south of the Equator?

Now we have a crisis we can talk about, so I am very happy in the fact I live in a place you guys call 'downunder'. ;)

Yeah, I know, I can be a real cheeky b*tch sometimes :p and proud of it LOL :heehee:

Look at any globe. Who is on top? That's right! Forget that globes are actually upside down and you are correct, I am right because my toilet flushes the way nature intended.

And you are also right... you are downunder, I am whatever the opposite of that is. I am northern hemisphere and that proves my illogical claim at clockwise waste removal. Also, who cares if the whole toilet flush thing is a myth.

[Melody Moore]

Look at any globe. Who is on top? That's right! Forget that globes are actually upside down and you are correct, I am right because my toilet flushes the way nature intended.
Ok, now you are really asking for it Steph :heehee:

I am also right because my toilet flushes the same way that nature intended. :p

The truth is there is no difference to how a toilet flushes in either hemisphere, the difference you will see with water is when you pull the plug out of a sink or a bathtub, it spins in the opposite direction in the Southern Hemisphere to how you would see it in the Northern Hemisphere. Our Cyclones spin clockwise in the Southern Hemisphere, whereas your Hurricanes spin counter-clockwise in the Northern Hemisphere (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cyclone#Structure). So if these things in the Southern Hemisphere are going the 'right direction' & yours are going in the 'wrong direction', then this must proves that you must indeed be living on the bottom-side of the earth. :heehee:

Did you know that when the shuttle & space station orbits the earth they actually are flying upside down? But when you see footage from inside these crafts then everything appears to be the right way up? So in the continuum of space (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Continuum_%28topology%29) then up & down do not even really exist. So who was the idiot that invented such terminology for a direction here on earth? Does anyone really know the answer to that question?

As for the globe being orientated the way that is only because the silly boffin who invented it lived in the Northern Hemisphere. Anyway, can you imagine trying to look at a globe if you lived in the Southern Hemisphere? I recall the problems we had in school standing around a globe trying to at countries in the Southern Hemisphere. I think this would have been the same issue the boffin faced when he was thinking about how to design such a globe. So how about you forget that the globe is the right way up & see things from my point of view, where down is up & up is down?

So isn't it all relative to the observer? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theory_of_relativity)

And finally, you cannot claim to drive on the right side of the road because we sit on the right side to drive, whereas you guys are all sitting on the wrong side when you drive. So really the left side of the road is the right side of the road we should be driving on.

Now who really has things arse-about-face now eh? See I told you we now have a real crisis on our hands. :lol: