confidence

[jerri kelly]

who believes they are passable and why.xxx to all sisters.

[Toyah]

Not no way OK from distance but ughhhh close up

[Lauren_T]

I can dream all I care to, but I don't kid myself... :(

[gender_blender]

I am rather passable whenever I want to be, which is fairly often. I'm even occasionally addressed as female when dressed androgynously.

It's probably the long thick hair, cleavage, and being physically fit.

Charlie

[Billijo49504]

Last night, when the pizza guy made his delivery, and the wife and I were on the porch, he said, "Hope you ladies have a good night." I dress better than what I see at the grocery store. The other night when I went to Payless for boots, the lady asked if I wanted a purse to match. Some day I'll have to learn to post pictures, then you can decide.

[Lana]

I've been passed up by like thousands of people, some who've never even seen me :D

[Noel Chimes]

I'm sure I am passable, if your name happens to be Mr. Magoo and you forgot your glasses. :eek:

[Tristen Cox]

Okay I'm going to post this and I'm not debating it with anyone.

You can have confidence, you can believe you pass because no one 'seems' to notice. Fine and dandy.

HOWEVER. Actually looking like a real female? We can all be polite here and boost each others confidence but in the end it's just that. There's passing because you have confidence and 'think' no one notices(and even other CDers say you pass) and then there's passing for real. In regards to number one option sure many here could pull it off, but - in regards to not even having to try and really being passable? Like a GG couldn't tell the difference? Haven't seen one yet that can pass on all fields including voice.

Could I pass or do I? I can 'believe' I do but I like to dream a lot too :rolleyes:

[Lana]

Okay I'm going to post this and I'm not debating it with anyone.

You can have confidence, you can believe you pass because no one 'seems' to notice. Fine and dandy.

HOWEVER. Actually looking like a real female? We can all be polite here and boost each others confidence but in the end it's just that. There's passing because you have confidence and 'think' no one notices(and even other CDers say you pass) and then there's passing for real. In regards to number one option sure many here could pull it off, but - in regards to not even having to try and really being passable? Like a GG couldn't tell the difference? Haven't seen one yet that can pass on all fields including voice.

Could I pass or do I? I can 'believe' I do but I like to dream a lot too :rolleyes:

Wow what a buzz kill Tristen, and just when I was gonna go forth into that cruel world all dolled up and all sorts of passable? "Waiter check please"

[Samantha Jane]

Me pass, never. :eek: That said I don't really care. I just love being me, although it doesn't hurt a girl to dream. :)

[suanne]

Thanks Tristen. Ah.......the truth. Ain't it wonderful. You brought that issue down to earth. I agree with you 100%. :thumbsup:

Suanne

[Wendy me]

passable ??? me??? well no not realy.... but i still get out from time to time....like i said in a nouther thread ..... i am not even close to passable but i shure am funable.......

[ChristineRenee]

Nope...not even close....but then...it has never been about me being passable here...but rather...feeling good about who I really am on the inside and trying to bring that out in the open in order to make others feel comfortable about me and with being around me. Hopefully...I am succeeding more and more with that on a daily basis.;) :)

[Gemma Rhodes]

Not at all, yet, and though I am working on it I doubt whether I will ever be.

[Maude]

who believes they are passable and why.xxx to all sisters.

i will never pass that test !
but it sure is fun taking the exam !!!

maude

[Deidra Cowen]

My voice trips me up. But if I don't have to talk I can pass on appearance. So I guess Tristan is right...but regardless I have a lot of fun doing the very best I can at my makeup and wig. Then I work very hard on getting cloths that while are in style for GGs these days are understated.

I was on a date with my GG friend two weekends ago. We went to a liquor store and a Chinese Resturant...I am very confident I passed at those places and no one busted me. It was a thrill. But if I had to talk to the waiter or the guy at the counter at the store I would have been busted!

Maybe I am kidding myself...but having a blast anyway! :rolleyes:

[Kimberly]

... I'm thinking that I'd never pass, so I'm just going to look at how I feel and how I see myself. If I'm happy... fantastic. If not... it's time for a different look ;)

[JocelynG]

We all tend to be our worst critic and I feel that being passable is based on the judgement of others and how well you blend into the stream of society outside. I agree with alot of what Tristen said. We need to be realistic before we can truely say we are passable. But like the other girls it does feel wonderful to say "I am passable" ;)

[sportschick]

But (though I've only been out maybe 6 times in my life), going out at night, no close-up encounters, no talking, and keep moving, so far there've been no comments, and no stares that I've noticed. Good enough for the temporary fantasy world I inhabit when dressed, still fun. As for actually passing, talking with a GG and pulling it off? Tristen's got it right, you gotta be kidding! Not even if I had a sex change and all the surgeries in existence. That's why we call GG's the opposite sex, they don't look like us..thank god!

[Jennifer in CO]

how 'bout..."used to"

When I was in my late teens and early 20's (esp after hormones) I passed without a problem..even tho I was 6ft at the time (and 135 lbs). Presentation is 20%, confidence is 80% in not only how you look, but who you are. Now, almost 30 years later, after steroids and age (and an extra 75 lbs), I couldn't pass as a GG if a fairy godmother waved her wand...but I dont care anymore either. I dont go out in dresses, but I do wear slacks and tops when ever I want.

Jenn

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

There's passing because you have confidence and 'think' no one notices(and even other CDers say you pass) and then there's passing for real.

That's why I think blending in is a better way of looking at. Do I pass for a real GG if someone's looking closely? I doubt it, especially when I open my mouth.

But when I go out do I get read? Not that much (at least to my face). GGs come in all shapes and sizes, so I'd like to think that I'm not atypical enough to draw people's attention. And if I do get read, the fact that my hair, make-up and clothing are what a GG would wear -- and not what a drag queen or hooker would wear -- seems to cause most people to relax. So they typically hold a stare a little too long and them move on to other things. Of course, this is San Francisco, so a guy in a dress isn't the strangest thing they've seen.

However, confidence is the key regardless of whether you blend in or not. Act like you deserve respect and you usually get it.

[Caz]

When Jackie & I are out and about doing work-a-day type things....shopping,having coffee,any type of interaction with retail outlets, we are frequently greeted with "can I help you ladies" or "are you ladies being looked after" It really is a common occurance for us.

Neither of us are wearing make-up, and are both dressed androgenously.

We put it down to the fact that we both have quite long hair (half way down our backs), and I wax my face, and have had a number of years of electrolysis.

We are both Rubenesque in stature, and I think this also contributes.

In regard to voice attributes, Jackie (of course) has no problem.
For me, I lower the volume/level of my voice to just above a whisper.

I think the bottom line is thus....People take a cursory glance, see two middle aged ladies, and no further scrutinization occurs.

That be our experience :)

Luv from Caz xx

[Richelle]

Tristen

You make some very good points. For me, I believe that I pass due to the fact that most people do not take a close look at anyone. This includes the ladies room. It was great the time I was waiting for a stall and a young lady pointed to me when another woman came in and said "she's next" pointing to me.

The people I have prople "pasing" are teenagers. They tend to look at people closer. When I am out, if I am read it is most oftern by a teanager or someone younger.

As to my voice I tend to keep very quite and it seems to work.

Richelle



Okay I'm going to post this and I'm not debating it with anyone.

You can have confidence, you can believe you pass because no one 'seems' to notice. Fine and dandy.

HOWEVER. Actually looking like a real female? We can all be polite here and boost each others confidence but in the end it's just that. There's passing because you have confidence and 'think' no one notices(and even other CDers say you pass) and then there's passing for real. In regards to number one option sure many here could pull it off, but - in regards to not even having to try and really being passable? Like a GG couldn't tell the difference? Haven't seen one yet that can pass on all fields including voice.

Could I pass or do I? I can 'believe' I do but I like to dream a lot too :rolleyes:

[Jodi]

I look at it as being presentable. I believe that if I'm dressed presentably with makeup done well, and with the right behaviors, I will be accepted and not questioned--maybe even passable. I believe in the confidence factor with presentation. When I am out dressed in a mall or on the street and see a group of teenage girls, I will purposely walk past them to judge reactions. I have never gotten an adverse reaction or any overt giggles. I do change the voice level when speaking, but the big thing is to change vocal inflection and use gestures and mannerisms. Women speak with a different inflection in their voices and most always use gestures when speaking. When speaking, I just give a big smile and communicate. I have really never had a problem.

Jodi

[cindybarnes]

I seem to be like many here,, I dont pass but enjoy trying my best to achieve the best look I can.
No way to hide big shoulders and hands, and sooner or later your gonna have to talk unles you can do sign language, then there's the hands again ;)
Cindy

[Phoebe Reece]

"You can fool some of the people all the time and you can fool all of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time."

Many years ago I used to worry about passing. Not anymore. I've found that if you dress appropriately for your age and where you are, conduct yourself as a lady when in public, it really doesn't matter if you "pass" or not. Most people will either treat you with respect or simply ignore you. The world does not stop spinning when a crossdresser is "read".

[Rachel_740]

I can dream all I care to, but I don't kid myself... :(

Lauren,

I'm going a long way off subject here - I'm going to your location!

I was always lead to believe it was Wales where men are men and sheep are scared. I thought Texas was big on oil. I confused (but that's not difficult).

And then it's Scotland that have the haggis bred with legs shorter one side than the other, so they can run around the mountains easily :rolleyes:

Anne

[Lauren_T]

Lauren,

I'm going a long way off subject here - I'm going to your location!

I was always lead to believe it was Wales where men are men and sheep are scared. I thought Texas was big on oil. I confused (but that's not difficult).

And then it's Scotland that have the haggis bred with legs shorter one side than the other, so they can run around the mountains easily :rolleyes:

Anne

Oo, yas - livestock, oil, swamps, desert - alla kinda stuff req's testosterone-based life forms to work with it... in other words - not for me!

I'm not joking when I call this place 'Hell, with mosquitoes laid on'! :D

Love that bit abt the haggis... :p

[Marlena Dahlstrom]

I look at it as being presentable. I believe that if I'm dressed presentably with makeup done well, and with the right behaviors, I will be accepted and not questioned--maybe even passable.

"Being presentable" is a nice way of putting it.


I've found that if you dress appropriately for your age and where you are, conduct yourself as a lady when in public, it really doesn't matter if you "pass" or not. Most people will either treat you with respect or simply ignore you. The world does not stop spinning when a crossdresser is "read".

Agreed. That's been my experience as well.

[urban gypsy]

Um pass as woman? what a question but in my case no way. but that does not always matter when you are having fun with people looking at you when you walk along hand in hand with your wife who is a good looker. love to know what they are thinking.

[Lauren_T]

I agree, if you are done up tastefully and comport yourself with decorum, you shouldn't have too many problems being accepted, even if you don't 'pass,' per se.