is it inherited

[Michelle 51]

Two weeks in a row in sunday school my 5 yr old grandson commented to my wife how pretty a dress was that a classmate was wearing and coming home she commented about it because it concerned her so i asked her if she though he liked womens clothes to which she responded that it wasn't normal for a little boy to coment on how pretty a dress was.I said what are you trying to say and she said well if he is attracted to dresses we know where he gets it from.I said are you saying that it's my fault and she said yes.I quess my problem with that is in my case she thinks its a matter of choice but if he turns out to be a crossdresser that it's because of me.I will add that i'm very masculine outside the closet as is his father and other grandfather so if he has a feminine side it's not from the way we act around him but something he inherited.I know this is a complex question but wonder what your thoughs are around our femme side and where it comes from

[GirlieAmanda]

I really think that the propensity for being a TG in any form is something you are born with. Inherited? That is a good question but following my logic, maybe yes. I was raised in a regular family with loving parents. Normal. I started to have inclinations toward makeup and girlie things like playing with dolls in grade school. Possibly earlier. How can a child know how to feel about these things. No one showed me or suggested it. Nothing in my upbringing was even remotely associated with CDing. I really believe it is inside at birth. It may go away in some if its not strong or it may grow. Obviously for me, it is massively strong.

[Bethany38]

Well Michelle my Grandfather was a CD. I knew from A very young age that I liked womens clothes. I did not know about granddad until later in life. So I definitely think it could be a possibility.

[Cherry Lynn]

I think the inclination to crossdress is inside at birth much the same as homosexual tendencies. Whether it is in the genes to be passed down might make a good study such as the ones that have been done concerning homosexuality.

[Cassandra Lynn]

I tend to agree with the idea of there being a genetic component, especially in such early ages. That said, no need to get too worried yet, this could well be just a fluke.
I also sincerely hope your wife isn't going to let this fault thing get her head all turned around.
Let's say the genetic angle is true, it "visited" you and maybe it has "visited" your grandson, hardly meakes any sense to claim it is your fault. How it happens is beyond our power, so unless we have the power to change these things, fault is meaningless.
Good luck with this.
mj (Cassie)

[Steph.TS]

I'll just say if it is inherited, then my dad must be working hard against it, it's a religious man, very strict and uptight, and when he found out that I crossdressed I think he made it his mission to stop me from crossdressing, I honestly don't know how he'd react if he knew I wanted to become a woman...

[BiancaEstrella]

I don't think it's inherited. It's just who he is, just like you are who you are.

[nvlady]

I am convinced it is genetic, but it does not always manifest itself in the same way.
I believe it is a faulty gene that will make some people crossdress, others will be gay, maybe another will like little children, or another will like S&M.

[RachelZ]

I highly doubt I inherited my love of crossdressing from my neo-nazi father... maybe it came from my mom who was a lot more open minded... then again both my parents were hippies, so idk... the large amount of drugs they took through their lives could have also been a factor...

[Molly Wells]

I have wondered about this as well. My youngest son is in his early 20's. I have no reason to suspect he may be CD. However,when he was about 4 or 5, I open the bathroom door and discovered him standing on the counter where he could see himself in the mirror. He had on a pair of his sisters spandex shorts and was turning himself to see his profile in the mirror. There has never been any indication of similar behavior but I wonder ....
Molly

[Tasha McIntyre]

Michelle, although there has never been a genetic link (as far as I know) there is a possibility that if your grandson does crossdress, this may well have been inherited genetically from you. That's all well and good, but what concerns me is...


I said are you saying that it's my fault and she said yes.

Blaming someone for their genetics is hardly fair, as you have no say over any of it. It's like blaming your parents for being tall or short. If she wants to play the genetics game, your wife may as well blame one of your ancestors for passing the gene on to you.

[Patty B.]

Whether or not it is inherited, no one can be blamed for their genetic makeup. When I first started to try on female clothes, it was so much a choice, I had to do it, it wasn't a choice. It was and is the way I am, probably like most of us.

[Lucy_Bella]

oh boy this thread again..... Yes I believe it is but hard to prove because genes skip generations you may have a aunt or uncle or great granfather who is or was wondering the same thing...

[ReineD]

There's no logic to her argument. If it's a matter of choice for you, then it should be the same for your grandson, hence it's not your fault. Or, if she wants to blame you for your grandson's proclivities, then she can blame one of your ancestors for yours and it's still not your fault.

But back to your grandson: one of my sons was constantly admiring girls .. what they wore, their hair, the way they smelled, whether they were his age or older. He's not a CD. He just always liked girls and he's hugely popular with them. He's 21 now. One of the sweetest stories I remember was when he was 3 or 4. We had a neighbor in her 60's who still wore her hair in a beehive style, and her hair was pure white. My son lovingly looked at her one day and said, "You have boooful hair. (pause). It looks just like mahshmallows." He also loved marshmallows. :)

OK, another story. When he was 5 or so, we were at a public swimming pool. He was admiring a teenage girl in a very tiny bikini. She thought he was adorable, and engaged him in a conversation. Her similarly clad friends soon joined her, and my son was surrounded by the hottest girls at the pool, all making a fuss over him. He was positively beaming!

He was the envy of every man there! :)

[eluuzion]

so i asked her if she though he liked womens clothes to which she responded that it wasn't normal for a little boy to coment on how pretty a dress was.

...so if he has a feminine side it's not from the way we act around him but something he inherited.

I know this is a complex question but wonder what your thoughs are around our femme side and where it comes from

In my opinion, "normal" is nothing more than a setting on a washing machine.
There is no such thing as "normal" for a 5 year old boy or girl. Certain behaviors may be viewed as "typical behavior" in a generalized format, but that comment of his was nothing suggesting anything "abnormal". He is a young child exploring his environment. Kids pop out whatever comes to mind at that age, based on observations. They have not yet absorbed and confined their comments to socially acceptable "norms" with any prejudice at 5 years old to the extent your wife is suggesting.

We tend to selective interpret what we see and hear with our personal bias. If you are self-absorbed with a personal issue...you tend to see the world through the colored lens that makes your bias perspectives glow wherever you go...

So, if he comes inside some day with a handful of earthworms, will she think he is going to be a bird? lol

:love:

[linnea]

I'm convinced that TG is genetic; CD is probably genetic too. There is a growing amount of evidence that this is valid, including new work with brain scans that compare the qualities of GGs' brains with those of TGs brains--fascinating similarities. Saying that, I also think that what is genetic can be shaped, nurtured, discouraged, etc. by social/cultural factors. One consequence of this is gender-dysphoria.
In any case, finding fault is fruitless. If there are perceived problems, one has to deal with them directly, honestly, lovingly. And do the best one can.

[flwildboy]

I must comment, as this is a topic that I question many times. I've heard stories of my father sneaking under the couch to feel women's feet in nylons when he was young. To this day, he comments all the time about liking women in silky slips. My mother said he loved nylons. My brother is partial to blame what got me started, but I got caught. When we were young, I always remember liking the feel nylons. Well when we were about 4-5-ish, he and a buddy talked me into playing a sock game. Reach into a pile of socks, and you have to put them on and run around the basement. Well there were also a few pairs of pantyhose in the pile. Amazing, how many times all three of us boys almost fought to get the pantyhose every time. Anyway, always loved pantyhose, and think I was bitten by the bug before the sock game. At about 12, my brother caught me in a pair of pantyhose. Very embarrassing, but was only brought up at the time. I tried to blow off the questioning and said I was cold. Through the years, nothing has ever been said, but there still a cold silence when pantyhose are mentioned for any reason. He has made several comments through the years, as to liking women dressed in nylons, and bobby socks. So I know he has the bug too. I also think through the years, a few pairs have been discovered in my room without me knowing by him or a few family friends. They and I act as though it never happened.

I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too. About 2 years ago, my teen daughter and 3 year old daughter thought it would be funny to dress him up in a Cinderella dress, and a pair of clear little girl heels. Well I about flipped. I demanded that he get it off, and told him I didn't think it was funny at all. What a hypocrite! But, if you read all the stories on here, most mention a memory of being a kid, trying something girly on, and bam!! Now every time he see's something on TV, a man dressed up as a women, or a boy wearing women's clothes he comments and seems to get a kick out of it. Now do I ever really put my foot down, and try to persuade him that it's not right, funny, or anything of the above? Hopefully one day when I'm dead, my secrets go with me, and are never found or exposed to him. Scares me to think, if he ever found out, would he assume he is tainted with this thing if it is genetic? Would he be more acceptable to think it is in his blood and go with it? And will he possibly blame me?

Would love to hear any comments.

[GingerLeigh]

I've mentioned this before. I strongly believe this is an inherited trait. My son who is very young is doing the exact same thing as I did at his age. Rubbing stocking clad legs and now playing with girls jewelry. It isn't a soft feeling thing as my relatives often pass it off as, its a feminine thing. He specifically chooses the colour he wants the women in question to wear and demands they wear it. He throws a tantrum if he doesn't get his way or is interrupted.
My wife knows I did this as a kid, but knows nothing of my crossdessing. I feel she suspects something now though. Keep in mind I do not present as a female nor do I have feminine traits so this is NOT something he learned from me. Sexual? No. He is way too young to even know what that is.

My dad is not a crossdresser. If he is, he never told me about it but I told him about me.

I fear through his actions, my son will unwittingly drag his father and his secret out of the closet as time progresses. I will need to be there for him, I hope we all survive this as a family.

Ginger

[sterling12]

Comments about clothes from Five-Year Olds mean just about nothing! I think your Wife needs to wait a few years before she lays this very large Guilt Trip on you! Although "A Propensity" to Crossdress may be possible, there's no scientific evidence to back that up. They haven't found "A Crossdressing Gene" as of yet, and nobody has been able to find an actual statistical link that shows this trait being passed on.

Next week, when he says he likes "The Way that Jimmie's Pants look," are we going to jump to The Conclusion that he's Gay? I think there's some sort of unresolved conflict going on here.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[NicoleScott]

Correlation does not imply causation. It is a logical fallacy that two events that occur together have a cause and effect relationship.
Long ago, research showed that there was a correlation between urban burglaries and the sale of ice cream. So, to reduce the number of burglaries, let's reduce ice cream sales. Turns out, that before air conditioning was common, the hotter it was, the more people left windows for ventilation (and easy access for burglars), and the hotter it was, the more people bought ice cream.

[kimdl93]

there certainly is a possible genetic source for cross dressng. But she made this observation as tho its a bad thing. I would think women would appreciate a guy that can notice and appreciate a pretty outfit!

[RachelOKC]

It wouldn't surprise me at all to find out there's a genetic component. Even if there wasn't, I'd be confident that it was at least somehow biological. Over the years of my involvement in the TG community I've known a number of people with more than one TG in the family. In one case it was father / son, and in a couple more cases it was brother / brother. Besides TG's, I've known a lot more gays and lesbians with GLBT sibblings or parents. I've never seen any indication that their gender and sexual identities were taught, learned, or nurtured in.

To cap it off, my own sister was born with ambiguous genitalia and incomplete reproductive organs. She had some corrective surgeries in high school, but I just don't know much more than this since it's been one of the big family things that we really don't talk about. I know she was born a girl, was brought up a girl, and appears happy as a girl. I can tell you that I've never seen her as anything but completely female.

What does it all mean? I don't know. I do find it to be an unlikely coincidence that my issues and and my sister's would be completely unrelated.

[sterling12]

A Second Idea occurred to me, and since it hasn't been mentioned...."Maybe he's just a Budding Romeo who likes Pretty Girls in Pretty Dresses." (This may be a bit of a Shock,) but perhaps he's Heterosexual! (Sighs and Groans at this point, "Oh no, anything but that....Heterosexual, and he enjoys females acting feminine!")

If you are "Diplomatic," you might try to calm your Wife down. If that's A Long Shot, just be silent; it will all Blow Over!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Sophie_C]

I think it could be possible. I won't say any more than that.

[Fab Karen]

He's FIVE. He hasn't yet been brainwashed into a rigid gender-role. I have to wonder if he said "those flowers are pretty" if your wife would be talking that way. If you liked broccoli & the grandson liked broccoli, would it come from you? no.

Rachel: aside from me, none of my family is/was gay or TG.

[AKAMichelle]

My personal belief is that cd'ing begins with a chemical inbalance of the hormones. Too much of one or the other while a fetus. Then that inbalance triggers other changes in the way we think later during our development. We don't know any better and it just happens. Once it happens then everything is set in motion, which eventually leads to us trying on women's clothes. With that event which usually happens in childhood a cd'er is born.

Now the inbalance may be genetic. I just don't know but I have watched a lot of TS become much more feminine after taking hormones. So it makes sense that there must be markers which we don't understand that starts everything, but later in life it begins to take over. Depending upon the degree of inbalance determines the end result to a great extent.

[Ann Thomas]

I feel it is genetic. My late dad crossdressed, and so also does my son, and he didn't know I did until he turned 18, and that's when I found out he already was doing it but had been afraid to tell me. But, that's not why I feel it's genetic. During the last presidential election, a news article came out that ended up being buried in all the political news, from a genetic research project done by a university in Australia, in harmony with a study done at UCLA, both of which confirmed the genetic markers for crossdressing. I've been wanting to get their information and have my genes tested to show the results to my wife, who does not believe it is genetic, but how I was raised. One of these days I need to drive up to UCLA and visit the researchers that released the study info. I've written emails and left voice mails for them but they never respond.

Hugs,
Ann

[sometimes_miss]

If crossdressing was indeed inherited, like most other genetically passed on behavioral traits that make it more difficult to find a mate, the vast majority of it would have died off over the generations. You'd only have occasional genetic 'mutants' exhibiting the trait. But could the other personality traits that make it more likely to survive be passed on should someone be a crossdresser, such as intelligence, strength, speed, etc.? Sure. But there's too many other factors involved to say that it's definitely inherited.

[Alice Torn]

I don't have any kids, but, I am starting to wonder about my cats! They seem to like to bug me when i am dressed up!

[eluuzion]

.I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too. About 2 years ago, my teen daughter and 3 year old daughter thought it would be funny to dress him up in a Cinderella dress, and a pair of clear little girl heels. Well I about flipped. I demanded that he get it off, and told him I didn't think it was funny at all. What a hypocrite! But, if you read all the stories on here, most mention a memory of being a kid, trying something girly on, and bam!! Now every time he see's something on TV, a man dressed up as a women, or a boy wearing women's clothes he comments and seems to get a kick out of it. Now do I ever really put my foot down, and try to persuade him that it's not right, funny, or anything of the above? Hopefully one day when I'm dead, my secrets go with me, and are never found or exposed to him. Scares me to think, if he ever found out, would he assume he is tainted with this thing if it is genetic? Would he be more acceptable to think it is in his blood and go with it? And will he possibly blame me?

Would love to hear any comments.

I do believe it is possible to unconsciously reinforce behaviors in your child that you are trying to eliminate. For example, in sharing custody with my ex (who admits she does not care for kids)...our daughter was extremely shy as a child. Hiding her face, etc. My ex was an expert at making fun of her shyness in public. Typical comments... She is just a scaredy-cat. She is always quiet. She never talks. She won't answer you. She is always like this. She has a real problem with shyness...etc etc...
Now what is wrong with that picture??? Everything, and my ex did not have a clue she was actually reinforcing shyness and insecurity in our daughter...


"I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too.”Did a licensed mental health professional diagnose it as a “sickness?”

“About 2 years ago, my teen daughter and 3 year old daughter thought it would be funny to dress him up in a Cinderella dress, and a pair of clear little girl heels.”I thought it sounded kind of funny and fun myself, after reading that. That is one way (of many ways)siblings play. I used to rip the heads off of my sister’s Barbie dolls for “fun”, but I did not become a serial killer. I dressed up as Superman too, but unfortunately I did not end up becoming one as an adult.

“Well I about flipped. I demanded that he get it off, and told him I didn't think it was funny at all. What a hypocrite!”I am confident that all three noticed that you “flipped” “and did not think it was funny.” It seemed to me that all three were just having fun together…not “plotting against you”. I was not there at the time of course, but one option might be that you might be “projecting” a bit in that scenario. Particularly when you mentioned being a “hypocrite”. ?

“But, if you read all the stories on here, most mention a memory of being a kid, trying something girly on, and bam!!” I innocently walked in on my mother putting on a garter belt and nylons when I was around 6-7 years old. I do attribute some of my attraction to nylons to that event, but I did not begin to crossdress until I was in my 30’s.

“Now every time he see's something on TV, a man dressed up as a women, or a boy wearing women's clothes he comments and seems to get a kick out of it.” No surprise on that one. Welcome to parenting, lol. He knows it “pushes your button.” Few kids would pass up the opportunity to rattle a parents’ cage, lol.

“Now do I ever really put my foot down, and try to persuade him that it's not right, funny, or anything of the above?” “My starting point was/is to try to maintain “age appropriate perspective” consistent with my daughter’s cognitive and comprehension abilities at the time issues appear. It is easy to over-estimate a child’s “comprehension capabilities”, particularly when they begin to grasp some of the more complex linguistic tools. This makes them “sound” smarter, when they actually are still restricted to applying yet undeveloped social and cognitive tools that sharpen with age.
So, playing with matches or drawing on walls…yes.
Having innocent fun with his siblings and friends…in my opinion…no.

One option might be to consider how you might be projecting your concerns and perspectives onto him and you might be trying to resolve the unresolved issues of your childhood by reliving them through him. (it is a common way some parents unconsciously try to get “one more shot” at resolving issues they could not as a child). Just a thought….

“Hopefully one day when I'm dead, my secrets go with me, and are never found or exposed to him. Scares me to think, if he ever found out, would he assume he is tainted with this thing if it is genetic? Would he be more acceptable to think it is in his blood and go with it? And will he possibly blame me?”
He will probably end up blaming you for all the bad stuff in his life, regardless of the strategy you employ… that is just what “kids” do.

Hey, the only alternative to blaming others for our misfortunes in our life is to take responsibility for our own life when we grow up…

~But where is the fun in that approach?~…hehehehehe

My daughter did not come with a rulebook either…but when I thought about it…
I realized there are only three basic rules that really matter anyway…
1) Always tell them you love them.
2) Always be there when they need you.
3) Never, never ever…give up on them.

There are my comments…nothing intended to judge or control…just to help.

ThinkLess, ActMore...Life is short

:love:

[5150 Girl]

In hurch just this past Sunday, our vacancy Pastor was speaking on how the chuch was tryng to decide on a new posion on homosexuality, and how to best deal witht he issue.
The reason they're revaluating the issue is modern science has found that it does show up on brain scans. (and other assundry tests)
The old policy was bassed on the idea that beeing gay was as choice, but now we clearly know that it's not.
Of course he then lead into a lesson on acceptence for others.

[Rianna Humble]

I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too.
...
Would love to hear any comments.

If you think that cross-dressing is a sickness, you need to see a psychiatrist to get your "sickness" investigated.

I understand that there are psychiatric illnesses that can mimic gender dysphoria so perhaps there are others that can mimic the need to cross-dress. That is why when I approached my GP for help with my gender dysphoria, I was sent for psychiatric screening. The doctor then confirmed that I am not ill, but I need support to transition.

For most of us, cross-dressing is not a sickness but part of our nature.

[Satrana]

Snore....I feel sorry for everyone here that thinks for sure it is inherited. If it were then it would have been easily proved a long time ago. CDs do not bred CDs, gays do not bred gays. No matter how much you want to believe the facts on the ground show there is no genetic component. And why should there be? Everything we contemplate as masculine and feminine qualities are artificially constructed by society. Go back to the ancient Greeks and the male body was considered the height of beauty, not the female body. Alexander the Great was gay and lead the greatest military conquest the world has ever seen with an army of men who were actively encouraged to take on a lover within the army. Everything we think we know about gender is convoluted from our conservative religious past and the natural division of labor.

[Hillary Rose]

I think its totally genetic, I was caught by my father when i was about 13 and he pulled me aside very kindly and said he used to do it, and there were surgery options if i wanted to go forth with it....

Few years ago my nephew is 10, i caught him in my mothers room feeling her pantyhose... an indication of whats to come possibly? I think it must be genetic.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Genitic, sure why not, some people are born with blue eyes, some are born artistic, some characteristics skip a generation, some are so dominate everyone has them. And if it was inherited from you be proud , There is noting wrong with inheriting a charterstic. it's more important that you keep an eye on your grandson and if he is being hurt by people who don't understand, BE there for him as he grows.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Snore....I feel sorry for everyone here that thinks for sure it is inherited. If it were then it would have been easily proved a long time ago. Everything we think we know about gender is convoluted from our conservative religious past and the natural division of labor.

Time to open your eyes to the posibility, Genetics rule everyting about a person, from how they grow and develop to who we actualy are. The type of thing you suggest is that gender is taught from 'our conservative religious past'. Antropoogists agree that there are many cultures where crossdressing and transgender people play a role in society outside of religion. By your thing the world would still be flat just because someone says it is, ignoring the obvious physical characteristics.

Kelly

[NicoleScott]

Sure, we need to open our eyes to the possibility, but it has not been proven, no gene has been identified, and given the prevalence of crossdressing, it would be surprising if someone on a person's family tree isn't a crossdresser, but that doesn't make it hereditary. But if it is, maybe it's carried by the MOTHER but manifested in males. Nobody knows. Until science nails it, it's pure speculation. The world isn't flat, and that's not speculation. The argument that everything is inherited totally discounts any impact a person's experiences play in his development.

[Jamie001]

Please do not call it a "sickness" as it is not! It is a gift and if your son hs the gift, it is not a bad thing.


I must comment, as this is a topic that I question many times. I've heard stories of my father sneaking under the couch to feel women's feet in nylons when he was young. To this day, he comments all the time about liking women in silky slips. My mother said he loved nylons. My brother is partial to blame what got me started, but I got caught. When we were young, I always remember liking the feel nylons. Well when we were about 4-5-ish, he and a buddy talked me into playing a sock game. Reach into a pile of socks, and you have to put them on and run around the basement. Well there were also a few pairs of pantyhose in the pile. Amazing, how many times all three of us boys almost fought to get the pantyhose every time. Anyway, always loved pantyhose, and think I was bitten by the bug before the sock game. At about 12, my brother caught me in a pair of pantyhose. Very embarrassing, but was only brought up at the time. I tried to blow off the questioning and said I was cold. Through the years, nothing has ever been said, but there still a cold silence when pantyhose are mentioned for any reason. He has made several comments through the years, as to liking women dressed in nylons, and bobby socks. So I know he has the bug too. I also think through the years, a few pairs have been discovered in my room without me knowing by him or a few family friends. They and I act as though it never happened.

I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too. About 2 years ago, my teen daughter and 3 year old daughter thought it would be funny to dress him up in a Cinderella dress, and a pair of clear little girl heels. Well I about flipped. I demanded that he get it off, and told him I didn't think it was funny at all. What a hypocrite! But, if you read all the stories on here, most mention a memory of being a kid, trying something girly on, and bam!! Now every time he see's something on TV, a man dressed up as a women, or a boy wearing women's clothes he comments and seems to get a kick out of it. Now do I ever really put my foot down, and try to persuade him that it's not right, funny, or anything of the above? Hopefully one day when I'm dead, my secrets go with me, and are never found or exposed to him. Scares me to think, if he ever found out, would he assume he is tainted with this thing if it is genetic? Would he be more acceptable to think it is in his blood and go with it? And will he possibly blame me?

Would love to hear any comments.

[JohnH]

I am wearing a floral maxi-dress as I type this response.
And right now as I edit this posting, I am in drab with a plaid shirt and jeans.
I alternate between enfemme and in drab that same way as a woman might do so between a plaid shirt and jeans, and a dress.

Sorry for the long-winded ramblings....

"I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too" and "It is a gift and if your son hs the gift, it is not a bad thing" - I don't think is is a sickness or a gift - it is simply one's preference of what one likes to wear.

I like to wear skirts, dresses, and heels. My wife wears only pants, shorts, and flat shoes unless she is wearing sleepwear. I have much longer hair than my wife. These are our personal preferences and we should not have to conform to stupidly narrow constraints, especially for males. For me I don't think it is anything genetic.

Just seeing the section of Male-to-Female CrossDressers being much bigger in terms of number of threads and postings than the Transmasculine section by a factor of over 20 should tell one that men have a much more constricted notion of what is acceptable than women.

There is something very much wrong with our society if there is such a lopsided ratio. What society dictates does not necessarily make it right. For example, in Italy in the 17th and 18th century is was considered immoral for women to sing publicly. Yet there was the need for adult altos and sopranos - and so there were the castrati. Never mind how many thousands of boys were castrated, even if they did not have good voices, and how they had to go through life as eunuchs.

If a girl wants to wear jeans and a plaid shirt as a tomboy it's OK. But let a boy be a janegirl and he is labeled as being sick!

When I was a boy I used to notice when girls wore pretty dresses, and I would complement them, and mention to my parents that I thought the dresses really looked nice. My brothers and I used to wear my parent's clothes and shoes - yes, even Mother's clothes and shoes, and my parents thought there was nothing wrong. My grandmother taught me and my brothers how to apply nail polish on our fingers, and we wore girls underpants when Grandma bought the wrong underwear.

If I wear a skirt to choir practice some old fellow tells me it disgusts him and yet his wife wears pants to the Divine Service.

I guess I don't have the emotional baggage of negative feelings of wearing feminine clothing due to my background.


Kind regards,

John

[kimdl93]

If crossdressing was indeed inherited, like most other genetically passed on behavioral traits that make it more difficult to find a mate, the vast majority of it would have died off over the generations. You'd only have occasional genetic 'mutants' exhibiting the trait. But could the other personality traits that make it more likely to survive be passed on should someone be a crossdresser, such as intelligence, strength, speed, etc.? Sure. But there's too many other factors involved to say that it's definitely inherited.

This is an over simplified and inaccurate representation of how genes are passed along. It iignores the fact that many genetically influenced characteristics are recessive, or only expressed when both parents have a particular combination of genes. If this writers' assumption was correct - there would be not genetic predisposition for cystic fibrosis, as an example. It also ignores the possibility that many behavioral characteristics can be highly favorable to survival and reproductive success, and at the same time may be associated with other less favorable characteristics. We're talking about a lot of lines of genetic code here, and lots of possible interactions. And in addition, we now know that certain genes can be switched on or off by the uterine environment. for example, its clearly documented that male offspring born immediatly following older male siblings have a much higher probability of being homosexual or effeminate. The effect isn't apparent when there are intervening female siblings. And this itself could be a survival benefit. Younger gay siblings may actually help increase the survival of the heterosexual sibling's offspring.

[SheriM]

Here's my thoughts . . .
If you are gay, you were probably born gay. Environment may have something to do with it, maybe 20%.
If you are a hetero-crossdresser, you are very normal. Many, probably most young girls dress very sexy, even though it may not seem sexy to them. Skin tight jeans or short shorts, tight tops, and showing sexy underwear. I can't believe that every hetero guy would not want to try on a pair of bikini panties. Us crossdressers just do it a little more than others. When I see a young woman with a good figure, I wish I was younger without morals, both to get her out of her clothes and to get in her clothes.
SheriM

[flwildboy]

Thanks for the advice!

[Lucy_Bella]

If a girl wants to wear jeans and a plaid shirt as a tomboy it's OK. But let a boy be a janegirl and he is labeled as being sick!

I find this as a very interesting statement, as the youngest of three brothers I also had a sister 2 years younger than myself. I spent most of my time growing up as kids with her.. I wasn't allowed to hang with my older brothers not my parents choice but my brothers choice. Living out in the country and the nearest male friend my age was a few miles away ,I really had no choice but to play with my sister.

We would take turns doing boy things and then girl things, yes we even played dress up.. But my sister grew up to be one hell of a Tom Boy and she is closer to me than she is to my brothers to this date. Now at that age I was made fun of by my siblings for being basicaly forced to play with her but she was never rib for doing any of the boy things we did as was talked highly about for being so tuff.

Now the question is, did my brothers snub me back then for being to Femme ? Or were they just being big mean brothers who didn't want their little brother slowing them down?

[Samantha_Smile]

I'm scared to death that my son will have this sickness too. About 2 years ago, my teen daughter and 3 year old daughter thought it would be funny to dress him up in a Cinderella dress, and a pair of clear little girl heels. Well I about flipped. I demanded that he get it off, and told him I didn't think it was funny at all. What a hypocrite! But, if you read all the stories on here, most mention a memory of being a kid, trying something girly on, and bam!! Now every time he see's something on TV, a man dressed up as a women, or a boy wearing women's clothes he comments and seems to get a kick out of it. Now do I ever really put my foot down, and try to persuade him that it's not right, funny, or anything of the above? Hopefully one day when I'm dead, my secrets go with me, and are never found or exposed to him. Scares me to think, if he ever found out, would he assume he is tainted with this thing if it is genetic? Would he be more acceptable to think it is in his blood and go with it? And will he possibly blame me?

Would love to hear any comments.

Sickness?
Tainted?

I have to tell you I'm a little offended by that.
Have you learned anything from being here?
If he blames you so what? If he seems to enjoy it whats the big deal. Just make sure he understands that not everyone (his class mates in high school- When the time comes) will appreciate his clothing prefferences and so to be careful about it. Unless ofcourse he starts to exhibit signs of gender dysphoria, that's very different.

Might I ask how dare you persecute another CD? Especialy one of your own flesh and blood. Damn right it's hypocritical.
Why not try explaining the issues that go with this? Ask him why he likes wearing girls clothes? Does he feel like a girl? Does he want to BE a girl?
Basically all the usual questions any of us get asked during the course of all this. Give him reason to consider it.

Im not saying all this just becuase youre CD bashing, thats a big part of it but just think. You are forcing him to repress potentially important feelings that may become a source of extreme guilt in later life. You are surpressing your child's personality.
It's not like this is destructive of harmful, so why scorn him?
Im shocked.
It does make me question what I will do when I have children, but I know just from reading this, that your reaction will not become mine.

Sickness?
Go have a good hard look at yourself.

[Joanne f]

I am not so much sure that it is the cross dressing that may be inherited but more the freedom of expression , i expect some children would feel uncomfortable saying some things to their parents if the parents give off bad vibes as far as self expression is concerned

[ReineD]

I'm staying out of this one. :D well, except for the cute stories about my son. :)

[Joanne f]

I'm staying out of this one. :D well, except for the cute stories about my son. :)


I am sure it would help the OP to hear them :)

( OK i am just nosey):heehee:

[ReineD]

Joanne, I honestly don't know. I haven't done any research on this.

I do remember reading an article posted here last year where they identified a related gene that points to the possibility of it being genetic, but I can't remember what it was exactly. I'll look for it though. :hugs:


EDIT

Found it!

The post in the media section: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?118344-Genetic-links&highlight=genetic

And this: http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2008-10/ra-glt102908.php

Excerpt: "The researchers discovered that male to female transsexuals were more likely to have a longer version of a gene which is known to modify the action of the sex hormone testosterone."

[rocktheplank]

Im going to say genetic, based on nothing... except sometimes I wonder about my dad, not that I think he ever did it or anything, but I wonder if maybe there was an inkling since he and I are so much alike

[Joanne f]

ReineD,
i would think that it has something to do with genes but is it a case of looking for something hard enough and you will find it or at least a reason to say that you may have found it , i would like to know how many no Ts they found without this genes before i put any real faith in it fist and has the body or mine a way of switching this on according to your likes and dislikes of things in your life , but it still remains a big driving force in someones life if they are effected in the CD,TG and TS way whether we control it or it controls us, but i am all for anything that may help in future acceptance of it by most .

[Mary Morgan]

So if our need to dress is genetic it is more acceptable than if it is choice? Hum, it's genetic! And if it is hereditary, oh my the mind reels with thoughts of past generations.

[Joanne f]

Just play it safe and quote which one you need at any given time :)
I expect it is a mixture of all as if it is genetic you still have to let your inbuilt desires guide you to where you want to go and that can sometimes be quite a struggle

[juno]

There are obvious genetic and environmental factors in everything that makes us who we are. Whether or not it is inherited, can't we get over thinking it is a bad thing? IMHO, a well-adjusted crossdresser has a better life (but I am obviously biased). The only down side is a bad attitude by others. If it were me, I would ask if he wanted to wear girls clothes, and if he says yes, buy some for him. Acceptance by parents is important for a happy CD. If only you could get the mother to agree...

[Kelly DeWinter]

So if our need to dress is genetic it is more acceptable than if it is choice? Hum, it's genetic! And if it is hereditary, oh my the mind reels with thoughts of past generations.

Mayby not the need to dress, but mayby identifying as/with female. I've allways wondered about the stories of animals changing gender when the population gets to large or out of balance. Is'nt the current human population like 7 Plus billion, thats 7,000,000,000, I think I have enough zeros.

[Satrana]

Time to open your eyes to the posibility, Genetics rule everyting about a person Sure they do so point to me the gene which makes me want to dress in female clothes. In fact show me the gene that makes me want to wear clothes at all. The way our society works is wholly dependent on artificial rules not on the instructions on how our bodies should be built. Remember males and females are not a separate species. It is soceity that has divided roles and behaviors into two separate camps because this increased our survival rate and adaptability. Every person is born with the full range of human behaviors and emotions. It is thus predictable that some individuals will come to realize that who they are does not fit into the blueprint society has drawn up and so will seek to remedy this misalignment.

All we need to explain this is normal variance within a population not a specific genetic annomoly which is passed down. Genetics follow a pattern. We would be able to detect patterns within population groups and family lineages if this idea had any validity. All the available data shows transgenderness has no pattern.

[Mary Morgan]

Kelly, the world is certainly out balance, and I have no doubt it would be better if each of us could just be ourselves without all the judgment from people who aren't secure in their own skin. So I'll sign up for the gender change and tell my wife it is for humanitarian purposes. I am such a giver.

[Freddy12]

To me, it doesn't matter. If you are a crossdresser, does it really matter why you are a crossdresser? You are who you are. Accept it and stop worrying or even thinking about it.

[reginaNJ1]

I would defintley agree that it is genetic. I started as early as 8 wearing my mothers cloths and wishing I had breasts and a vagina. My father was a cross dresser and I found that out much later.I continued after i got married and then later on started hormone theraphy. My wife was tolerant of it and didnt say to much.

[Emma England]

None of my family are crossdressers, so I have not inherited it myself.

For me, it started when I found that women's underwear felt a lot nicer than mens.

[Proteus]

Perhaps I've had it backwards, but I appreciated a pretty dress long before it occurred to me I could wear it.

Now is a good time teach the boy that it's good to give a girl a sincere compliment every now and then, I know a lot of guys, myself included, who are notoriously bad at that.

Edit: Also, not all things in nature can be attributed to either genetics or environment. Some things occur completely at random. At least that's the case in quantum mechanics, but I wouldn't be surprised if that also applies to the human gender.

[Kelly DeWinter]

Sure they do so point to me the gene which makes me want to dress in female clothes

It's the the pink and blue gene on the 231,345th paired genome from the left on the reverse counter clockwise rotational of the twisted double helix strand ...... aproximatly.

I appologize I did not mean that a gene makes us want to dress, but that a gean 'probably' makes us identify much more strongly as famale, then male. Think of it like our tastes for certain food. I never ate spicy food when I was young, my parents never served it. When I went in the Navy, I was introduced to spicy food, I LOVED it, could not get enough. Sometimes 1 hour of gastronomic pleasure, is worth the 24 hours of intestinal pain i pay afterwards.

.... All we need to explain this is normal variance within a population not a specific genetic annomoly which is passed down. Genetics follow a pattern. We would be able to detect patterns within population groups and family lineages if this idea had any validity.

One of these days when TG's are more out of the closet (which is happening now) someone will do a study, where thay can ask questions like "are there any transgendered realtives in your family"



Kelly

[Kelly DeWinter]

Kelly, the world is certainly out balance, and I have no doubt it would be better if each of us could just be ourselves without all the judgment from people who aren't secure in their own skin. So I'll sign up for the gender change and tell my wife it is for humanitarian purposes. I am such a giver.

Mary, ROFL - You are a mrytr for the cause !
P.S. excuse my spelling